Blossoms of Love (53 page)

Soon he was asleep. He hadn’t made love to her in over a week. He was so tired when he came to bed. Barbara couldn’t go to sleep. She thought, “We just don’t have any time together any more. When he’s not on the range, he’s either taking the children fishing or riding or he was at the club. Of course, I went with them some, but I want Monty alone sometimes.” She listened to his regular breathing, “Darling you just work too hard.”

Morning came, Barbara looked over on Lamont’s side of the bed. He was already up. She raised up in bed and called, “Monty?” He stuck his head around the corner of the bathroom. He was brushing his teeth, “I’m in here babe.” She got up and went over to him, “Don’t I get a good morning kiss?” He grinned with toothpaste in his mouth, “Right now?” Barbara said, “That’s more than I’ve been getting lately.” He rinsed his mouth, “Uh oh, my wife feels neglected.” Barbara threw a tee-shirt at him. She asked, “You mean you don’t know?” He came up to her and gently put his arms around her soft body, “I guess that’s the first sign of getting old.” Barbara said, “Oh poop, you’re not forty yet.” He grinned, “No, but I’m getting damn near it.” Barbara traced her finger around his mouth, “You know what they say, life begins at forty.” Lamont chuckled, “I sure as hell hope so.” Then he kissed her very tenderly. He looked into her eyes, “You know that new stock can wait to be branded as far as I’m concerned.” He slipped the negligee off her shoulders as he kissed her on the neck. He gently picked her up in his arms and laid her on the bed. He dropped his briefs and laid down beside her. They teased each other with their hands until neither could wait any longer. Then, with the weight of his body on hers, he possessed her. As always their climax was fulfilling and satisfying. He asked, “Love me?” She teased, “Well—I do now. I thought I’d find someone else to love me.” He grabbed her to him, “Hey watch that. You told me I was the only man who can really satisfy you.” Barbara said, “That’s true but sometimes you’ll settle for second best.” He slapped her on the butt, “Like hell you will.” He kissed her again and began to get dressed.

The last week in August, Lamont and Barbara gave a big barbecue for his family and the work hands and their families. Mrs. Ellman came early to help Barbara and Sara. It was going to be a beautiful day. Lamont, Jesse, and David gathered the firewood and began the cooking in the back yard. Everyone was there by ten o’clock that morning. The children played while the women made slaw, potato salad, and stuffed pepper. Leon showed the children how to make Jimmy’s horse raise his head and show his teeth. Jimmy was amazed, “Uncle Leon, how did you do that? Will you show me how?” Leon said, “Sure I’ll show you and all the others who want to learn.” The older children gathered around Leon and Jimmy’s horse. Leon also made the horse nod his head and bow to all of them.

David got some more firewood. He said to Lamont, “Leon’s putting on a good show for the kids.” Lamont laughed, “Yea Leon was always good on training a horse to do anything. We use to have one when we were kids that he could make do a lot of tricks.” Jesse said, ‘Man does that barbecue smell good!”

Ellen and Alice put table clothes on the long, wooden tables outside. The aroma of the barbecue beef made everyone hungry. Barbara noticed Ellen wasn’t as cheerful as usual. Barbara got Ellen’s hand and said, “Come on, help me carry the paper plates and napkins out to the tables.” As they carried them out Barbara asked, “Care to talk about it?” Ellen asked, “Does it show that much?” Barbara said, “I’m afraid so.” Ellen remarked, “I never was good at hiding my feelings. Maybe I’m making a mountain out of a mole hill but Susan (their oldest daughter) and Johnny just can’t get along lately. They had a big argument before we came.” They sat the napkins and plates down on the tables. Barbara said, “Well you know Susan is in that difficult age. She’s not a child any more yet she’s not an adult either.” Ellen said, “Yes I know. Just like this morning, Susan decided she didn’t want to come with us here today.” Barbara said, “That’s easy to understand. There’s no one here her age.” Ellen replied, “But Barbara she’s only three years older than Dennis and Linda.” Barbara said, “There’s a big jump from twelve to fifteen. In those years you’ve developed and your interests are different. Don’t you remember how grown up you felt when you were her age?” Ellen sighed, “Yes I remember but I wasn’t boy crazy. Susan thinks she is in love with a seventeen year old boy. She dated him once or twice. Johnny thinks she’s been slipping around dating him. Johnny won’t let her date except for special occasions. He said she is too young to start dating regular. That’s why we wouldn’t let her stay at home alone today. Johnny blew his top so they had a big fuss. It just spoiled my day.” Barbara patted Ellen on the hand, “I wouldn’t worry too much about it.” Ellen asked, “Would you or Monty talk to Susan? She likes both of you.” Barbara said, “Sure one of us will. Now come on, enjoy yourself.”

Soon they all gathered around the tables filling their plates with the good food. Then Lamont saw Susan sitting down by the swings all alone. She was making no effort to come eat. Lamont asked Johnny, “What’s wrong with Susan?” Johnny answered, “She’s mad at me.” Lamont left the tables and walked over to the swings. He asked, “Is my cooking too fattening for a pretty girl?” Susan looked up at her favorite uncle, “I’m not hungry.” He sat down on a swing beside hers, “Now come on honey, you’ll have to do better than that. Your old uncle knows you better than that. Want to talk about it?” Susan said, “Nothing to talk about.” He asked, “No? Then why the long face?” Susan said, “I wish Daddy was like you. I can’t talk to him. He gets mad. He thinks I’m still a little girl.” Lamont said, “Well we Ellmans are known to have bad tempers but we’re great lovers.” She smiled. Lamont said, “Seriously angel, nothings so bad it can’t be talked over and unusually when you do, it’s not as bad as it seemed.” Susan said, “I told you Uncle Monty, Daddy thinks I’m still a little girls. I’m not a little girl any more. All the girls I go to school with date. Daddy won’t let me date boys yet.” Lamont said, ‘Now let’s analyze this problem. You’re fifteen. You’re very pretty and you’ve developed early into womanhood. Now at fifteen, do you think you could handle a boy if he got fresh with you? Believe me honey, they will try. To young people there is a very thin line between infatuation and the blooms of real love. Most young girls are infatuated with their boyfriend and that’s why they let them make love. Do you know what infatuation means?” Susan said, “Not really.” Lamont said, “It means a short-lived passion. It never lasts.” Susan said, “I know how to handle boys. I know how far to let them go. Lamont said, “Okay, let’s say you do. What if a boy you’ve been dating say three or four times says he loves you. What would you do?” Susan said, “A boy has already told me that and I love him.” Lamont sighed, “Susan you are too young.” She said, “There you go. Just because we’re young everyone thinks you can’t love anyone besides your family. I do love him and he loves me.” Lamont said, ‘I don’t know of anything else to say except I hop you don’t give away to your emotions. If he really loves you he will wait until he has a right to have you. Think about it Susan.” Lamont got up and left her to think about what he had said.

Allen heard Barbara say something about someone being wonderful. He looked around and asked Cindy, “Who’s so wonderful?” She answered, “You are.” Allen said, “What have I done to deserve this?” Cindy said, “You fell in love with me and married me.” Allen teased, “And that’s wonderful?” She poked him in the ribs, “You bet your sweet life it is.” Everyone laughed.

As the women cleared the tables and put away the leftovers, Johnny began taking pictures. It was his hobby. Everyone was so busy they hadn’t missed Berry and Alice. Lamont said, “I know where they are. Berry has fallen in love with my hammock. Alice looked at her husband, “Uh oh, they’ve found us. Here they all come.” Berry pinched her on the thigh, “Let’s go home soon. I’m hot as hell. The girls can come home as Leon and Ann do.” Alice said, “I’m game but you find an excuse.” Berry laughed, “I don’t need one. I’ll just go tell Monty I want to go home early and get us a little.” Alice said, “Berry you wouldn’t!” Berry chuckled, “I am. All he will say is get gone brother. Don’t ever let something that good get away.” Alice said, “How do you know he would say that?” Berry laughed, “Honey I’ve told him before. We all tell each other sometimes.” Alice got up from the hammock, “You guys.”

Alice and Berry did leave early. By seven o’clock, everyone was gone. Sara said, “Leftovers tomorrow and maybe the next day.” Lamont said, “That’s okay. Your leftovers never taste like leftovers.”

Just when all the Ellman seemed to have everything going smooth for a change, Barbara went to see Dr. Morris. After he examined her he asked her to come to his office. She sat down on the chair in front of his desk. Dr. Morris said, “You’ll have to have an operation soon. Barbara how long have you had this lump in your breast?” She said, “About three months.” Dr. Morris said, “You should have come to me sooner.” Barbara asked, “Is it serious?” “I’m almost certain it is cancer. Of course, I won’t know for sure until we get ready to operate.” Barbara asked, “If it is, will you have to take my whole breast off?” Dr. Morris said, “Yes. That would be the only safe thing to do.” Barbara began to cry, “Oh Dr. Morris, my face isn’t pretty, my hair is an ugly shade o brown, all I had was a fairly nice body. Monty always thought I had nice breasts, now I won’t have anything.” Dr. Morris said, “You won’t have a life if you don’t have something done very soon. You didn’t turn Monty down when he came home disfigured from the war. He won’t turn you down either.” Barbara said, “Monty has a beautiful face.” Dr. Morris asked, “If he hadn’t been handsome you would have turned him down?” Barbara dried her eyes, “No of course not.” Dr. Morris said, “Then have faith in Monty.” Barbara got up to leave. When she got to the door, Dr. Morris said, ‘I want you checking in the hospital tomorrow.”

Barbara cried all the way home. She was glad Sara had taken the boys over to Ellen’s house for a while. She was also glad Monty was still at the stables. Barbara looked in the full length mirror on their bedroom door. She wanted him to make love to her tonight, to love her more than she’d ever been loved, because after the operation, he would probably not want her.

She took a bath and put on her prettiest gown. Sara had supper cooked because she and the boys would be late getting back. They were going to a movie in town. She laid down on the bed and thought, “Oh God, haven’t we had our share of troubles?” Then she wished she hadn’t even thought of that. Who was she to question God? Then she said, “I’m sorry God. I have no right to question you. Please help me. Help my family.”

She heard Lamont come in the back door. Jesse was with him. Lamont asked, “Anybody home?” She answered, “I’m in the bedroom darling.” Jesse went to his and Sara’s room. Lamont came into the bedroom, “Hello babe. Where is everyone?” He kissed her. She said, “Sara took the boys to Johnny’s Then they are all going to that movie they’ve been talking about for weeks. Sara has supper ready. I’ll warm it up. I know you and Jesse are starved.” Lamont said, “I’ll shower first.”

As Lamont and Jesse began to eat Jesse asked, “Aren’t you gonna eat Barb?” She said, “No, I’m not hungry. I’ve got a bit of a headache. I think I’ll go lie down while you two eat.”

While she lay on the bed, she could hear Lamont and Jesse laughing. Jesse was telling Lamont something funny that happened today. Soon the two men had things cleaned up and Jesse went to his room. Lamont turned the lamp on by the bed, "How's the headache?” Barbara said, “It’s better.” Then they heard Sara and the boys. Both boys stopped by and told Barbara and Lamont goodnight. Robbie hugged both of them, “We didn’t get to see the movie.” Jimmy said, “Don’t fuss Robbie. Sara said she would take us back tomorrow night. The film didn’t come in today.” Then Jimmy hugged them all and said goodnight.

When they were gone upstairs, Lamont said, “We got two fine sons. I’m proud of both of them. Once I didn’t think I could really love a child as my own if it didn’t belong to me. I was wrong. I love Jimmy as much as I do Robbie. He really seems like my own flesh and blood.” Barbara said, “I knew you would”

As he began to undress he looked over at Barbara, “You look like you need a lot of loving.” She smiled, “How did you know?” He winked at her, “You’ve got that hungry look in your eye.” He laid down beside her and reached out and held her to him, “It’s just wonderful to come home at night to a lovely wife waiting for me. Always ready to love me. I’m damn lucky.” She clung to him, “Love me. Please love me.” He kissed her cheek and felt the tears on his lips. He asked, “Why the tears?” She answered, “Nothing, I’m just happy.” He reached over and turned the lamp on, “I don’t buy that. I know you better than that. You don’t cry often and when you do it’s something serious. Come on, out with it. I’m not gonna make love to you until you tell me.” Barbara said, “I didn’t want to tell you until in the morning.” Lamont said, “I’m waiting.” Barbara said, “I went to see Dr. Morris today”. I have to go in the hospital tomorrow. I have to be operated on.” Lamont sat up in bed, “What in the hell is wrong?” Barbara cleared her throat, “I’ve got a lump in my left breast.” Lamont didn’t say anything for a second. The only sound was the lock ticking on the night stand. Then he asked, “How long have you had this?” Barbara said, “I noticed it three months ago. The lump is getting larger.” Lamont said, “Three months ago! Baby why have you waited this long?” Barbara explained, “It was so small and it didn’t hurt so I really thought it would go away but it hasn’t.” Suddenly she burst out crying, “Monty I’m so scared. Dr. Morris said he was almost sure it was cancer.” He cuddled her to him, “Everything will be alright.” Barbara cried, “How can it ever be again? They will they my whole breast off. That’s all I have pretty enough for you to look at and after tonight I won’t have anything.” She wasn’t worried because it was cancer. She was more concerned because she would be ugly to her husband. Lamont tried to comfort her, “If they take off one breast—so what?? We’ll make a good couple, you with one breast and me with only part of my manly tools.” Barbara cried and laughed at the same time, “How can you joke?” He asked, “Why not? As long as I’ve got you that’s all that really matters. Anyway, it won’t be many more years until I’d rather think about sex than do it.” Barbara said, “I can’t believe that. Sex is very important to you. Not long ago you said I had beautiful breasts.” He said, “You do. After all babe, you’ll still be better off than me. You’ll still have one left. Look babe, I didn’t fall in love with any certain part of you I fell in love with all of you. Remember what you told me when I was in the hospital in California? You said you loved me, not just part of me. I believed you and it brought me through hell and back. Now you believe me.” He touched her breast and gently moved his hand over it until he felt the lump. It was about the size of a walnut. He asked, “Does it hurt?” She answered, “No, it’s not even sore. It’s just getting bigger. In case you don’t know it Monty Ellman, you’re making me hot.” He winked at her, “I’m gonna give you the best damn lovin’ you ever had if it kills me.”