Cam eyed him, as unfazed as AJ. “I’ve been around. I heard you were sick, but I thought you might be hiding out from Rex’s monster cock.”
“You heard about that?” Levi frowned. Jon had told him he was keeping the scene on the down low until it was shot. It was a big deal that one of Blue Boy’s most exclusive tops was going to break his own rules, and it had to be managed right, though Levi suspected Jon wanted to be sure Levi would go through with it before he leaked any publicity.
AJ threw down his wrench and wiped his hands, cutting off Cam’s reply. “On that note, I’m taking a lunch break.”
It was midafternoon, but Levi wasn’t about to point out that lunch had come and gone. Discussing the three-way in front of AJ didn’t feel right. The dude was barely forty, but he was the closest Levi had to a father figure in his life. He waited for him to cross the street before he turned back to Cam and said, “I’m not hiding from anything.”
“Wouldn’t blame you if you were. I wouldn’t want to be breaking myself in with Rex. What were you thinking? Are you fucking insane?”
Levi sighed. It was Cam all over to cut right to the chase. “Jon made me an offer I couldn’t refuse.”
“I’ll bet.”
Levi let the silence hang, waiting for Cam to confess that he was indeed sleeping with Jon, but no such confession came. He sighed again under his breath. It had been a few months since the rumors had started, but he'd never talked about it with Cam, and he found himself equal parts frustrated and relieved. Frustrated because, away from the madness of porn, he considered Cam a friend, and relieved because, well, he didn’t get it. At thirty-eight, Jon was hot enough, and he’d always been good to Levi, but really, who wanted a porn boss for a boyfriend? A man who spent all his time thinking about other dudes having sex?
“Earth to Levi?”
“Huh?”
Cam waved his hand in front of Levi’s face. “Something on your mind?”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know, maybe the fact that you’re about to pop your ass cherry with some mutant-dicked giant? Seriously, dude. Why are you doing it?”
Levi reached for a bottle of water, opened it, and took a long swig. He had a vague memory of one beer-fueled night at Silver a few years ago when he might have told Cam more about his financial situation than he really wanted to. The night had ended at Cam’s place with a bunch of other models, and besides the reaffirmed knowledge that he and Cam shared a respectful sexual chemistry, the only thing he remembered was that Cam gave
really
good head. “Why does anyone do porn?”
“You tell me,” Cam said. “I got into porn to pay for college, and I still do it because I kinda love it. You, my friend, do not love it. You do it because you think you have to. I think you enjoy it sometimes, but that’s the primal, animal side of you. Deep down, there’s a big part of you that hates what we do.”
“I knew that psychology degree of yours was gonna come back and bite me in the ass,” Levi said. Cam was wrong. He didn’t hate porn, and he wasn’t ashamed of how he made a living. There was just something missing in his life right now, and he didn’t know what.
Cam reached over and swiped Levi’s water bottle. “I don’t need academics to bite you in the ass. Been there, done that. If you’ve got an itch you want to scratch, there’s better ways of—”
“You shot with Rex?”
“No.” Cam twisted the cap back on the water bottle. “I’ve watched a couple of his scenes, though.”
“And?”
“Put it this way. He’s not gonna go easy on you, even if you ask him to. From what I’ve heard, that riles him up. The dude’s got no respect.”
Levi swallowed, remembering the fear in Kai’s eyes a few days ago. Was that what people thought of him too? That he would actually fucking hurt them? “What about Sonny?”
Cam grinned. “Yeah, I’ve filmed with him. He’s a damned good fuck, bendy as hell. We had a lot of fun.”
Levi eyed Cam. Cam had never mentioned Sonny before, but the smirk on his face seemed familiar, like Levi was missing something obvious. “He seems like a whiny diva prick.”
“Really?” Cam shook his head. “Nah, you’ve got that wrong. Sonny’s a handful, but he’s cool, and he’s
all
fucking man. I told Jon I would’ve fucked him for free.”
Levi snorted. Cam said that about pretty much every scene he shot. It was only the fact that he was as resolute about topping as Levi that kept them from fucking each other, just for fun, of course. “You say that all the time.”
“Not true,” Cam said. “Anyway, you’ll find out for yourself soon enough. That’s the plus side of getting nailed by Rex, right? You get to fuck Sonny. Trust me, you won’t be disappointed.”
Levi felt sick. He slumped and put his head on his arms. The prospect of fucking Sonny was intriguing but laced with apprehension. To fuck Sonny, he had to get fucked himself, and there was nothing exciting about that.
Cam reached over and laid a hand on his forehead. “Jeez, you’re burning some fever there, man. Do you want me to drive you home?”
“You don’t have a car.” Levi shrugged him off. It was true, he did have a fever, but he knew the flush of his skin couldn’t be completely attributed to being sick.
Damn you, Sonny Valentine.
Later that day, he left the garage and headed for home. He hadn’t kept anything down for twenty-four hours, but he swung past the store all the same and picked up bread and ginger ale, hoping his churning stomach was a sign he was hungry.
He parked by his building and trudged inside, throwing the contents of his pockets on the coffee table. His cell phone beeped as it clattered against the glass tabletop. He picked it up and glanced at the message, expecting more well-meant ribbing from Cam.
Still sick? — S
Levi frowned. S? Who the hell was S? He fired back a message, threw the phone back on the coffee table, and retreated to the bathroom to shower away a day of oil and fevered sweat. After, he drifted back to the couch and flaked out in front of the TV. He was all but asleep when his cell phone roused him.
Sonny. Cam sed ure sick?
Sonny? What the fuck? Levi sat up and rubbed his eyes. His digits were known to quite a few models at Blue Boy, but he was pretty sure Sonny Valentine wasn’t one of them. He wandered into the kitchen, tapping out a reply, and downed a generous shot of bourbon to clear the congestion in his chest.
Yea. B back soon.
Need anything?
Like what?
Drugs? Gatorade?
I’m good. Thx.
Levi paused after he sent the last reply, deliberating over another shot of hard liquor, before he sent another message.
Why?
Why what?
Why you askin?
There was a break in the quick-fire texts then. Levi took his cell phone into the bedroom and dropped it on the bed. He came back from brushing his teeth to find it still blank, and it remained so until it rang a little while later and woke him for a second time.
He fumbled for the phone, barely registering that the screen was lit up with Sonny’s number, and pressed the Call button with his thumb.
“’Lo?”
“Did I wake you?”
“Yep.”
“Sorry,” Sonny said, though he didn’t sound all that contrite.
Levi rolled over, scrubbed a hand over his face, and glanced at the clock. It was just after midnight, and he’d spent most of the evening asleep, but he still felt like death. Maybe the half-pint of bourbon wasn’t such a good idea. “How did you get this number?”
“Cam gave it to me.”
“Oh, yeah? Why did he do that?”
Sonny laughed softly. “Does it matter? Or would you rather know why I wanted it?”
There was a pause as Levi considered his answer. His apartment was quiet and still, but at Sonny’s end, he could hear the distant sound of pounding dance music. He wondered if Sonny was dancing at Silver. “Why did you want it?”
“I saw your scene with Kai.”
Oh. “And?”
“And…I don’t know, man. Jon said you signed up for the three-way. I was kinda hoping you wouldn’t.”
“You woke me up to tell me that?”
Sonny was silent. Levi pushed himself up on one elbow and looked out of the window. The sky was dark and clear. A handful of stars glittered against the midnight backdrop. “Listen, this has been epic, but I feel like crap. I gotta sleep. Are we done?”
“Have you bottomed for someone like Rex before?”
Levi sighed. Clearly this wasn’t over, but he wasn’t about to admit that he’d never had
anything
bigger than a tongue up his ass before, let alone a monster cock like Rex’s. “What do you care?”
“I’ll take that as a no,” Sonny said. “And I don’t care, as such. I’m just trying to figure you out. I’m not like you. I like to know who’s putting their dick in my ass.”
“Porn star with a conscience?”
“Maybe. Or maybe I’m discerning. Ever tried it?”
And so it went on. Levi woke up the following morning with the keypad of his phone imprinted on the side of his face, and a vague memory of falling asleep with Sonny’s soft accent still chattering in his ear.
Still, until Sonny appeared on his doorstep a week later, he was utterly convinced the whole conversation was the result of an alcohol-induced fever dream.
Chapter Six
Levi yanked open his front door, fresh from the gym and dressed only in sweatpants. He did a double take at Sonny’s lean, agile frame leaning on the opposite wall of the corridor. “What the hell are you doing here?”
Sonny smirked and pushed himself off the wall, eyeing his bare chest. “Nice. I told you I’d come by tonight and show you how to stretch for your big bottom scene.”
“You did?”
“Duh, yeah.” Sonny slipped under his arm and into the apartment. “What the hell? Were you drunk or something?”
“Or something,” Levi said, unimpressed by the mere presence of Sonny in his home and the implications of something he had no memory of consenting to. He’d never bottomed, but he wasn’t naive enough to believe that Sonny’s version of stretching involved hamstrings and yoga poses.
Sonny dropped his bag on the floor and narrowed his eyes, his gaze appraising. “Feeling better?”
“Uh-huh.” Levi eyed the bag. How long did the kid think he was staying?
“You sure look better than you sounded last week. Did you cut your hair?”
Levi sighed. “Do you ever quit asking questions?”
“Better than whining, right?” Sonny smiled, his rakish grin set off by a day’s growth dusted over his jaw. It wasn’t the thick, dark stubble Levi liked to wear, but it added something to Sonny, something he found far too intriguing.
“I guess. Tell me again why you’re here?”
“You really don’t remember?”
Levi shook his head, though in truth, now that Sonny was right in front of him, vague recollections of a rambling conversation he’d never dream of having while in his right mind began to drift back to him.
Sonny took advantage of Levi's silence and poked his head into the living room. “Nice place,” he said. “Shoulda known you were a neat freak.”
Levi bristled. It was an accusation he’d faced before. Cam figured his bordering-on-obsessive need for order in his home stemmed from his chaotic childhood, but Levi didn’t much care. It wasn’t like he spent all his free time lining up the cans in the cupboards. At least, not often. “You came all the way here for a home inspection?”
Sonny ventured farther into the living room with Levi trailing behind him. He spun in a slow circle to face him. “No I came over here to stop you from letting Rex rip your ass open. I thought we’d covered that?”
“What makes you think I need your help?”
“Okay, maybe you don’t.” Sonny migrated to the wall and peered at the one photograph Levi had of his parents. “What are you going to do instead? Bend over and hope for the best?”
Levi crossed the room in two strides, lashing out before he could stop himself. He yanked Sonny away from the photograph and pinned him to the wall with one arm. “What do you think? You think I’d let
anyone
bend me over?”
Sonny’s eyes flashed, but he didn’t fight Levi’s hold on him. “If you can’t figure out how to control a three-way scene from the bottom, you’ll have no choice.”
“Why do you want to help me?” Levi ground out the words, his face inches from Sonny’s. “I thought you were gonna enjoy every scream from my arrogant mouth?”
“I changed my mind.”
Levi increased the pressure of his forearm across Sonny’s chest. “Why?”
Sonny stared at him for a long moment. For the first time, Levi saw confliction flare in his cocksure gaze. “You need to prepare your body, or it’s gonna tear you apart.”
“Talking from experience?”
“I might be a ‘whiny twink’ in your eyes, but I was a stupid kid once, stupid and naive. You don’t want to make that mistake, trust me. That kinda shit stays with you.”
“Yeah?” Levi released his hold on Sonny, letting him regain his footing. “So what can you do to help me?”
“I can show you how I get ready for a scene.”
Levi thought for a moment. He had a pretty good idea what getting ready for a bottoming scene entailed, though it wasn’t something he’d ever envisioned himself doing. “You want me to watch you?”
“Might help.”
“Nah.” Levi shook his head, his mind made up. “I don’t need to watch you. I can do it.”
“Really?” Sonny raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t seem so sure the other night.”
Levi scowled. It was unnerving to barely remember a conversation about something so intimate. “Yeah, well, maybe
you
should watch
me
.”
Sonny laughed and leaned back on the wall. “That’s what I suggested in the first place. I said we could do it on Skype, but you mumbled some shit about being a technophobe.”
Levi winced. That
did
kind of sound like him. He could work a cell phone and his laptop for basic Internet browsing, but the world of social networking had passed him by. “Okay, how about I do it, and you tell me where you think I’m going wrong?”
Sonny shrugged. “Whatever you want.”
The exchange should’ve been strange, or at the very least awkward, but it wasn’t. Levi hadn’t filmed with Sonny, but they shared the same lack of inhibition that came with the job. Though it was unchartered territory, agreeing to play with his own ass while a virtual stranger looked on felt perversely normal.