Blue Desire (12 page)

He
slid back and then thrust back in. Then back more before filling her again.
Then farther still. His hands, one
gloved,
the other
not, moved to grab her hips, controlling her movements. He pulled on her when
he thrust in and held her still when he partially withdrew. Her clit tingled,
wanting attention and not getting it. With every thrust, the tingling got
worse, and it filled her head. She wanted to be touched there so badly. In
fact, she could definitely come this way, filled from behind—no, fucked in the
ass, that was the term for it. She was getting used, roughly, and she wanted
it.

She
pushed back, trying to drive him deeper, even though he felt impossibly huge
there, because she wanted more.
More of anything but above
all more of this powerful man and his control.
The hands on her hips
were the best part, telling her that she couldn’t get free and wasn’t in charge
of her movements. His grip seemed as much made out of steel as the bones in the
corset.

“Would
you come if I stroked your clit right now?”

She
thought of shaking her head. Maybe she could get what she needed, but if she
did, he wouldn’t come first. He might punish her for that. Spank her, although
that didn’t frighten her. Disappointing him was more frightening. “Yes, I think
so.”

“Yes
what?”

“Yes, Sir.”

His
ungloved hand moved let go of her hip and cupped her mound. Then he used it to
pull her, and he either had grown another half inch or found a way to get even
farther in. She gasped. His hand was so close.

“Would
it take just a touch, or would I have to rub?”

“Rub,
Sir.” She wasn’t sure. Actually the thought of him pressing her clit hard was
almost enough. But a light touch seemed wrong, somehow. She wanted more than
that. She wanted it as rough as she could get it.

“I
don’t think I’d enjoy being gentle right now, so I won’t tempt fate. You will
come, Kat.
When I want you to and not one moment before.”
He sighed. “I’m almost there, you know. I’m hanging by a thread. I’ve got all
this pressure built up in my balls since the last time I played with you, and I
want release.”

She
felt like she was on the edge too, but at his words she knew she wanted
something else more. She wanted him to come. “Yes,” she heard herself say.
“Please.” She imagined him shooting deep inside, or even withdrawing and
covering her back.

He
swelled inside her and then gave a low cry, almost a growl. Then his fingers
slipped between her legs and pressed her clit so hard she felt as if it was
being ground against the bone beneath.
“Now, Kat.”

As
if she could stop herself if she tried. Her orgasm bloomed like an exploding
gasoline truck, flowing outward from her clit and involving every muscle in her
body a split second later. His still rigid cock stopped her ass from squeezing
as tightly as it usually did when she came, and for some reason that made it go
on and on. He grabbed her as her hands gave way, holding her up as a thrill
rippled up and down her spine.

“Fuck
fuck
fuck
,” she
cried,
the intensity of it almost too much for her. She
couldn’t get enough air, but somehow that intensified everything too. She felt
like she was on some kind of crazy drug.

“We’re
fucking, little kitty, trust me. And we’ll be fucking for a while.”

She
was sure he’d come. Any man would need some rest. But she didn’t argue with
him, because he felt so good. His strong hands holding her up was what she
needed right now. He withdrew from her slowly, and as he did so, he pulled her
up so that he could hold her better. She had thought that maybe she wouldn’t be
able to feel a hug as well through the corset, but she could, and it was warm
and wonderful. He kissed her cheek, and she turned to meet him, pressing her
lips to his. He tasted sweet.

“Was
your first time, wasn’t it?”

“Yes, Sir.”
She blushed, but she knew she’d been
found out, although she didn’t know quite how.

“Thought so.
You should learn to tell the truth,
little kitty.”

She
nodded, feeling guilty. The whole idea that nodding wasn’t lying seemed pretty
specious now. “Are you going to punish me?” she asked. She bit her lip. She
wanted to tell him how sorry she was.

He
looked at her for a moment and sighed. “I’ve never enjoyed the idea of
punishment,” he said at last. “The things I do—flogging, spanking—are meant for
pleasure, not for retribution. But do you need to be punished, Kat?”

She
needed to make it right, and she didn’t know how to do that. Slowly, she
nodded.
“Yes, Sir.
Please. I can’t just…let it go, and
I don’t want you to send me away.”

He
blinked. “I wasn’t planning to send you away tonight.”

Tonight.
How about tomorrow?
But that was silly thinking because
he’d made no commitment, and she hadn’t asked for one. She wondered if her face
betrayed the mixture of relief and disappointment at his reaction.

He
frowned. He slid off the condom and then the latex glove on his hand. He folded
the inside-out glove around the condom and tossed them into a metal
wastebasket. Then he pulled on the knot holding the corset tight, and Kat felt
it loosen. She thought of asking to keep it on but stopped. She had asked to be
punished. He tugged at the loops, giving them more
slack
.

“I’m
really sorry, Sir.”

“Show
me by not telling me any more lies.”

Ouch
. But she supposed
she deserved it.
“Yes, Sir.”

He
reached around her and undid the hooks on the front, and the garment fell away
from her. It should have been a relief, to get something that tight off, but it
felt more like she’d been pushed out of a hug. He laid it carefully on top of
the chest of drawers, making sure the two halves lay perfectly flat on the
surface. She watched, feeling as if she might cry. Not for the corset—at the
emotional barrier that seemed to have come between them. She felt suddenly
adrift, and it was making her stomach knot up. She hadn’t expected to care that
much. His back was broad and strong, and she could have touched it, but it
seemed a mile away.

Then
he turned, sat down on the bed, and pulled her into his lap. He held her tight,
as firmly as the corset had although in a different way. His skin was warm
against hers, and she pressed her hand to his chest and felt the soft hair on
it. She ran her fingers over his nipple. She kissed his neck.

“You’re
mine for the night,” he told her, “and you’re not going anywhere. I’m going to
take you, again and again. You’re going to walk out of here sore, more so
because of the spanking I’m about to give you. But I think it will be a night
worth remembering.”

She
took a deep breath. “I’m yours to use, Sir.”

“Yes,
you are.”

His
response made her shiver. She’d said words like that before, as a come-on, but
she thought it was the first time she’d ever meant them. She didn’t care if she
came again. She didn’t even care if she liked what was going to happen. He’d
already made sure of her pleasure, and now she desperately wanted it to be his
turn. He’d come once, but she wanted him to come again.
And
again.
She found that horribly confusing after years of looking out for
herself, of having to look out for herself because no one else would.

Suddenly,
he pulled her legs to his left and pushed her shoulders down with his right
hand. She went from being held to lying over his lap, ass up. She could still
feel how he’d stretched her. It wasn’t sore exactly, but her body hadn’t
forgotten where he’d been, either.

She
twisted her neck so she could see him, and she was surprised by what she saw
there. He didn’t look aroused. In fact, she
realized,
his cock wasn’t even hard; she could feel it soft beneath her. Instead he
simply looked disappointed and maybe sad. She’d caught him in an unguarded
moment, she realized. It was like sneaking into her mother’s room to see her
Christmas presents before they were wrapped. She was seeing something she
wasn’t supposed to see, and his expression broke her heart. She’d hurt him by
lying and possibly hurt him worse by asking him to punish her.

He
noticed her looking, and his expression went blank. “Turn your head, little
kitty,” he said. “This is going to hurt, and I won’t hold back for tears.”

She
turned her head, and the tears started flowing before he even touched her. The
first smack on her butt came as a relief. It was no light warm-up, the way most
doms
did it in a club. Instead it hurt as he’d
promised. He swatted her again and again, and her tears made wet tracks down
her face. She’d never met a man like Brett. He was someone she could be honest
with, and she couldn’t get out of the habit of lying. He stood up for her
against Angus, he was good in bed, and he’d caught her every time she’d fibbed.
She wondered what it would be like to surrender to this man completely, to ask
him to spank her anytime she screwed up, until she didn’t screw up anymore.

He wouldn’t like
that. He’d want me not to screw up. Maybe that’s why I feel safe with him.

Safe.

She
wanted to tell him she was safe because she knew she was. She hadn’t actual
intercourse for over a year until he’d fucked her ass. Was that actual
intercourse? Well, it was fucking, anyway. She knew she couldn’t know for sure
about him, that she shouldn’t trust him. But she wanted to tell him anyway, so
that when he took his pleasure, he wouldn’t have to do it inside a rubber
sheath. Not if he came in her mouth, at least. That was, well, not safe, but
safer.

There’s not a damned
reason for him to believe me, even if I told him.

She
didn’t like herself very much right now, at all. She pushed her butt back,
hoping to make the blows harder, as if they could wipe out all she didn’t like
about herself, but instead he stopped and caressed her bottom.

“Sir?”
she asked.

“You’re
not a bad girl, Katrina. No one bad wrote those songs with their hidden
messages of love and hope below the hard edge. No one bad is over my lap right
now, either. You need to know you’re safe. That being
yourself
is okay.”

He
pulled her up again and set her upright on his lap, her butt on one hard thigh.
Her bottom was definitely sore now, and it hurt to sit on anything, but he
probably knew that. She accepted it as part of her punishment.
Thank goodness for the muscle. It’s at least
softer than bone.

He
licked her cheek, tasting her tears. It felt more intimate than being fucked,
and it almost made her start crying again. She wiped at her face with her fist.
He’d think she was a regular faucet, and the truth was she wasn’t prone to
tears at all. She hadn’t even cried when she’d gotten kicked out of the band.
She didn’t want him to think she was soft. But she wanted to be soft with him.
It was hard to sort out.

He
kissed her hard, and her lips parted to accept his tongue. She could taste the
salt of her tears on him. It felt like the kisses she had imagined when she
dreamed of being conquered and claimed, and she yielded to it eagerly. She
twisted her body, rubbing her breasts against the hair on his chest. She felt
his cock stir. She knew what she wanted to do.

The
moment his lips parted from her and his grip loosened, she slipped down to the
floor. She wanted to finish what she had started before and have his cock in
her mouth again. But she’d learned from before. She leaned in close enough to
kiss it and asked, “May I, Sir?”

He
picked the strawberry-flavored condom and handed it to her. “Yes.”

She
ripped open the package and slid it over his hardening cock. It was still
sticky from him coming inside the condom. She wanted to lick it clean, but she
resisted, covering it with the protective rubber instead. Then she took him
into her mouth, inhaling the scent of strawberry and the sweet taste. He still
wasn’t at his full length, and she could get him all the way in with
difficulty, although the tip of him tickled her gag reflex. She cradled his
heavy sac in her hand and slid her finger underneath.

He
swelled inside her and hardened further until she was forced back to avoid
choking. She slid him in and out of her mouth, squeezing her lips around his
cock. She didn’t know if she was giving him enough friction through the condom
or not, but judging from his sharp intake of breath, she decided she was. She
put her fist around the part of him she couldn’t get in her mouth and pumped,
looking up at him to watch his reaction.

He
moaned and watched her. She enjoyed having his full attention. She let him
slide almost all the way out and licked his tip. The strawberry flavoring was
starting to fade, but that didn’t matter to her. What mattered was that she had
his rapt attention. Assured of that, she took him in again as far as she could
make him go, her hand moving in time with her head. She closed her eyes in
concentration.