Authors: Kwame Alexander
who thinks your post
was a cry for help
when actually
you were just listening
to Eminem
and thought
the song was
kinda nice.
cinnamon French toast with blueberry preserves
homemade lunches
her headlocks and sloppy kisses
her saying
sugar balls
when she's pissed
her cheering at matches
Ping-Pong late Saturday nights
clean clothes on Sunday
double fudge milkshakes after church
dinner with real plates and glasses
her bad horse jokes at the table
both of them holding hands watching TV
family meetings
and, yes,
you even miss the group hug after family meetings
but, no,
neither your mom nor dad
is a monster
and you don't need
an interventionist.
Camouflaging your fears doesn't make them go away, Nicholas.
I'm afraid, okay. Now what?!
Now we try to figure out what to do.
I know what to do. I need to learn how to fight.
You think you need to learn how to fight?
Why are you repeating everything?
There are ways to deal with bullies.
Like what?
What do you think are some of the ways?
I guess if I knew that I wouldn't be here.
Why don't you think about some ways to deal, and when you come back for the next session, we canâ
Wait, I'm coming back?
We have five more minutes
remaining, Nicholas.
Is there anything
you'd like to say
to your parents?
Other than
it kinda blows
that I'm here
instead of playing
in the soccer tournament,
I'm good.
. . .
Really, I'm fine.
The twins aren't coming back
to school this year,
and I didn't really mean
I wanted to be dead.
I just . . . I just think . . . I guess
I was mad, and if
they don't love each other
anymore, then
they shouldn't be together.
You only get one chance
to love,
to be loved.
And they lost theirs.
I get it.
Of course we still love each other,
Dad says.
We just can't be together,
Mom adds.
Let's explore that,
says Dr. Santa.
What do you think about
what your parents are saying, Nicholas?
I think being an adult
must be confusing
as hell.
Also, I'm starving.
Are we done?
The silence
at dinner
is only interrupted
by the chomping
of chips and salsa
at what used to be
our favorite family
restaurant.
On second thought,
there
is
something
you'd like to ask
your parents.
According to a brochure
in Dr. Fraud's office,
adultery is the leading cause
of divorce among Americans.
Principal Miller would agree.
His wife got caught kissing
a man who wasn't Principal Miller.
Splitsville.
Your Uncle Jerry quit his job
and your Aunt Janice found out
when her brand-new Lexus got
repossessed. Separated.
Coby's dad and mom
never got divorced
because they were never
married.
But you still don't know
what happened.
So right after
the first bite of enchilada
you say: Dad, did you cheat
on Mom or something?
Beads of sweat cling to his bald head.
Mom stops chewing and gulps.
But before either can answer,
guess who walks up
in a T-shirt that says:
  Â
I Like Big
BOOKS
and I Cannot Lie
?
Mom and Dad,
this is Mr. MacDonald,
our librarian.
Dad stands up,
shakes his hand, and
The Mac, in,
get this,
red, white, and blue
bowling shoes,
kisses Mom's hand.
Dad kinda frowns.
Nice to meet you two, finally.
Sorry for the sweaty palms.
Happens after bowling.
Mom slips her hand in her lap (where her napkin is).
Your son talks
about you all the time.
I hope nice things,
Mom says.
Actually, he kinda wants
you to take it easy on him.
Life ain't been no crystal stair
for young Nicholas here,
he adds.
The silence is thick
and super uncomfortable.
I'm just kidding,
The Mac says,
and then
breaks out into
a way-too-loud chuckle.
Well, I should get back
to my lady friend. Just
wanted to say hello.
Nick, they're a lot cooler
than you said,
he pretend-whispers to you.
Well, it's our pleasure,
Mr. MacDonald,
Mom says.
Oh, one more thing, Nick.
Did you finish that Pelé book yet?
You lie and say yeah,
'cause the last thing
you need is he and Dad
ganging up on you
over a book
that's never
gonna get read.
He turns to leave, and
your mouth hits
the table
when you see
The Mac's
lady friend
in red heels
waving
from across
the room is
Ms. Hardwick.
Yuck.
Mom, I overslept, can you
drive me to school, please? It's
too late to take the bus.
Sure.
How'd you get to school?
My mom.
She's back?
She was. But she's gone again.
Why didn't you call me?
I overslept.
Dude, you never oversleep.
I just wanted to see my mom a little longer.
Yeah, whatever.
You want to come over after school?
Don't you have practice tonight?
We're just running today. Coach says we're ready.
Ready to get demolished like an old apartment building?
We'll see.
You see what April has on today? Whoa! Be bold, Nick!
Yeah, I should.
Be bold or go home.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna wear cool today.
Huh?
No more corduroys and turtlenecks for Nick Hall.
What are you talking about, Nick?
At lunch, I'm asking April to be my girlfriend.
Yeah, right!
Seriously, I am.
What are you gonna say?
Uh, will you be my girlfriend?
That's corny. Be cool with it.
How would you know? You've never done this before.
You either.
My dad gave my mom flowers once.
You gonna give her flowers?
I could, there's some yellow ones in the library.
Those are fake, bro.
Oh! Yeah, you right. Maybe I'm rushing it. She may not even like me.
Didn't she already tell you SHE LIKES YOU?
I'm just saying, maybe she doesn't like me anymore.
Don't chicken out.
I almost forgot, we have a sub today.
Where's Hardwick?
All the English teachers are in a meeting today.
Cool, we can play blackjack.
DANG!
What?
I forgot to brush my teeth today.
So.
I can't talk to April today, like this.
I got some gum in my locker.
I'll just wait.
What happened to no more corduroys, chicken?
I'll wear jeans on Monday.
Brawkk-AWK!
CLUCK CLUCK!
At lunch she walks by, smiles.
HEY,
APRIL,
Coby yells.
NICK HAS
SOMETHING HE WANTS TO TELL YOU!
Don't know if it's
the fish nuggets
you ate,
Charlene's perfume,
the egg sandwich
someone's eating behind you,
or Coby's leftovers.
Whatever it is
sends you
running
out of the cafeteria
just as the volcano
of butterflies
in your belly
E
R
U P
TâS.
Go wash up. I ordered pizza for dinner.
Nah.
Pineapple pepperoni.
Ugh.
You've already eaten?
Got a stomachache.
Drink some ginger ale. That'll help.
It just hurts. I need to lie down.
Are you in pain?
A little.
Come here, let me check your forehead.
Really? C'mon, Dad, I'm not a baby.
You're hot, Nick.
I just practiced for two hours, Dad. Course I'm hot. Good night.
Maybe you ate something bad today.
Cafeteria food is always bad. We had fish nuggets. Pretty nasty.
I'm gonna run out and get some activated charcoal.
Charcoal? Like for the grill?
Go get in bed, Nick.
G'night.
If you're sick, you probably shouldn't play tomorrow.
Oh, I'm playing in the match tomorrow.
Nicholasâ
Dad, I'll be fine.
We'll see.
. . .
hungry, so you eat. Chips. Coke.
Thank goodness that's over. Bored,
you even read the Pelé book.
You and Coby
are on teams
that like each other
as much as crocs
and Kenyan wildebeests.
There's always
a skirmish
during
the matchup.
There's no beef
between you and Coby,
but you WILL go hard,
come with your A game,
'cause while winning
is wicked,
bragging about winning
is icing
on the steak.
You good, Nick?
Coby asks
at midfield
for the coin flip.
Good enough to beat
your sorry team, you answer.
Not gonna happen!
Pernell,
your co-captain,
jogs up.
Coby daps you,
then goes to shake
Pernell's hand,
but Pernell leaves
Coby hangin'.
(Told you it was a rivalry.)
Call it,
the ref says,
then tosses the quarter.
Coby calls tails
.
He loses.
You choose the ball.
Before Coby turns
to leave,
Pernell chides,
Sorry about that, chopstick,
then laughs,
but Coby laughs back,
then winks at him,
and Pernell is flummoxed
or pissed
or
both.
Both teams take their positions.
You know Coby's smile
is misleading.
He's ready to pounce.
You
pass to the forward, whose
shot stings like wasabi, then
disappears into net. BOO-YAH!
with the score 2â1,
Coby dribbles the ball
past two of our defenders,
speeds down the sidelines
like a cheetah,
then slants
toward the middle.