Born in Sin (8 page)

“Meaning?”

“He has many enemies at court. Including some who would gladly kill him if the opportunity ever presented itself. Women as well as men.”

Callie couldn’t imagine living a life in which no one could be trusted. “And he has no friends?”

“He has me and King Henry.”

“Nay, Simon. He just has you.”

Simon frowned. “I don’t understand.”

“If Henry were really his friend, he wouldn’t ask Sin to venture into an unfriendly country where he would be even less welcome than he is here.”

Simon gave her an appreciative look. “True enough, milady.”

Simon excused himself and took Jamie out to play before the lad destroyed the room.

Seating herself at her dressing table, Callie tried to think what she should do. Part of her knew it was the worst sort of foolishness to bring an Englishman into her clan, and yet another part of her was fascinated by Lord Sin and the possibility that he could be the bridge between her clan and the English.

She was well past the age of marriage. Years ago, she’d been promised to a man who had died of illness mere months before their wedding. She’d spent two
years mourning him. Just as she reached the end of that period, her father had died. Since then, she had been too occupied with the problems of her clan and the unknown rebels to think about a husband.

How she wished Morna was here. Jamie’s mother was good at thinking through matters such as these. She would help her decide what was best.

But then, Callie knew the answer in her heart. She had to get home before the rebels or her uncle attacked the English to get her back. Her Uncle Aster wouldn’t rest until she and Jamie were home, and there was no telling how many of her clan would perish in that foolishness.

If Sin kept his word and left his men behind, then perhaps there could be peace. Perhaps the men of her clan could see the English weren’t so terribly bad. Of course, from what she’d seen, some of them were demons incarnate; but then, even some of her precious Scots could be a bit bloodthirsty as well.

Oh, what was she to do?

Her head ached as thoughts and doubts chased each other around.

The door to her room opened. Callie looked up to find Aelfa standing pale in the doorway, wringing her hands. Though they hadn’t known each other long, the lass had come to mean a great deal to Callie. Aelfa had been her only friend and confidante these weeks past, and had aided her in ways that would have the tiny woman beaten if anyone ever learned of it.

Now the dear soul looked as if she’d seen the devil himself on her heels. “Aelfa, what is it?”

She moved forward, biting her lip and twisting her wide sleeve in her hands. “Oh, milady, I just be hear
ing something awful, I have, and I know not who to tell or what to do about it. Maybe I should just forget what I heard. Aye, forget it.” She looked around a bit wildly as she nodded in silent agreement with whatever words were in her head.

Aelfa froze and her large brown eyes widened even more. “But if I do and he dies, then I would be responsible. God might not forgive that. Would it make me an accomplice? Aye, I think it would. The king himself might want me dead for that one. Oh, Lord, I’m too young to die. I haven’t even a husband yet, nor children. I don’t want to die yet. Nay!”

Callie pressed her fingers to her temple in an effort to follow the woman’s prattle. She took Aelfa’s arm in a gentle grasp and tried to get the lass to calm a bit and explain what had her so distraught. “Aelfa, what exactly did you hear?”

“Men talking in a room down the stairs.”

Now, that, unlike her previous monologue, made sense. “What were they saying?”

The lass crossed herself, her eyes turning wild again. “They said they were going to kill Lord Sin tonight so that one of them could marry you for your lands. He said he’d be teaching them—beg your pardon, milady—them Highland dogs how to mind their betters, and that he would train the—beg pardon again—Scots bitch to heel.”

Callie’s heart froze at the words as disbelief tore through her. It was quickly followed by rage and indignation. Just who would dare say such?

“Have you told his lordship?” she asked the young maid.

“Nay. He scares me too much.”

Callie patted her on the arm in gratitude. “Thank you, Aelfa. I’ll tell him myself.”

When she reached the door, Aelfa’s voice stopped her. “Milady, you realize that should they kill him, you won’t have to marry him?”

The thought had never entered her mind. And even now that it had, her choice was clear.

She couldn’t stand by and see a man slaughtered. Especially one to whom she owed so much. Regardless of what others thought, she knew the heart of the black knight, and it wasn’t so dark or forbidding.

Without another word, she left the room in search of Lord Sin.

S
in stood in the center of Henry’s throne room, waiting for the king’s return. Why he bothered, he couldn’t imagine.

Henry had made his decision clear. Sin was to find the Scots rebel leader and kill him.

There was nothing unusual about the order. He’d murdered more than once at Henry’s command. It was what made him anathema to the court. An abomination to the pope.

It was also what had saved his life as a boy.

He’d only been ten-and-four when he’d taken his first life. He’d never forget that moment. Scared and shaking, he had followed his orders and gone into the man’s room at a local inn. The man had been nothing more than a poor pilgrim who had come to Outremer to pray. The Old Man of the Mountain, the leader of the Saracens who had bought and trained him, had ordered the pilgrim slain and Sin knew that had he failed, they would have taken him out and…

He shook his head to banish the memory.

He didn’t like to remember the past. There were no happy memories of childhood or of anything else.

All he remembered was the wanting.

Yearning for a mother’s kindness. A father’s gentle hand. What he had gotten was innumerable insults and beatings. Torture at times so cruel and severe that he wondered how he had managed to survive it with his mind and body intact. Then again, maybe his mind wasn’t so sound after all. Surely no one could survive what he had and be left normal.

Day by day, sometimes even hour by hour, he had suffered through and emerged so strong that no one could touch him now.

He was granite. And he fully intended to stay that way.

Sin cocked his head as he heard a sound. It was the soft whispering of leather against stone. So slight, most men would not have heard it at all, but for a man whose lack of vigilance had cost him dearly in his youth, it was mammoth.

From the shadows he saw a man emerge with a dagger. In an instant, he knew the man who attacked him. Though why it surprised him, he had no idea. Roger’s enmity toward him was nothing new.

Sin rolled his eyes as the fool rushed him with the dagger raised. “Roger, this is a mistake.”

Before the knight could comment, two more attacked.

Sin sighed disgustedly. They knew he was unarmed. No one was allowed through the main entrance of the throne room bearing arms. Not that it mattered.

He caught Roger with his foot and kicked him back. The knight went sprawling.

The next man he knew not at all. It didn’t matter. Sin hit the ground in a roll and knocked him off balance, then twisted the sword from his grasp.

Sin heard the rasping swoosh of Roger tossing a dagger toward his back and the door opening. Instinctively, he dropped to the floor. The dagger whizzed past and embedded itself into the chest of the man he had been about to fight. The man gasped as he sank to his knees.

The man he’d disarmed ran out the open door while Sin turned to see Callie standing there in shock.

Roger started for him, but Callie jerked at the rug beneath Roger’s feet and sent the man sprawling.

Hiding his amusement at her aid, Sin angled his stolen sword at Roger as the knight slowly regained his feet while Callie stepped back to observe them.

The knight’s eyes glared his hatred and Sin was amazed Roger didn’t run and hide. It was what the knight did best.

Sin lowered his confiscated sword. “Care to explain?”

“Explain what? That someone needs to kill you? Everyone knows you need to die. How many sleeping throats have you cut in the name of Henry?”

Sin heard a soft gasp at the words. He glanced behind Roger to see Caledonia covering her mouth with one hand, her eyes wide. Now she knew the truth of him.

So be it. He’d never hidden from what he was.

Perhaps it was for the best. Now she would hate him as everyone else did. It would make avoiding her all the easier.

And yet something inside him shriveled at the thought of her hating him. It made no sense to him at all. But then, few things in life did.

Roger looked to the woman and his eyes narrowed. “Does she know you were a
hashishin
?”

Sin took a deep breath as he recalled the way his masters had
thoroughly
trained him in ways to take a man’s life. He saw the confusion on Caledonia’s face as she regarded the two of them.

“She doesn’t know the Saracen term
assassin
, Roger.”

“She knows the term
murderer
. That’s what you are. You are a filthy murdering dog with no conscience or morals.”

Sin lifted the tip of the sword to Roger’s throat. “You’ve said enough. Any more words, and I will show you firsthand what my Saracen trainers taught me.”

Roger paled.

The gilded oak doors opened to admit Henry and his guard. The king drew up sharply as he caught sight of Sin in the middle of the room with his sword at Roger’s throat. “What is this?”

Henry’s guards came around to protect their king.

Sin stepped back and handed the sword hilt first to one of the guards. “Nothing of any great import, Sire. ’Tis only another attempt on my life.”

Callie stood in shock at Sin’s bored tone. It was as if he thought little of the fact that the man had just sought his death.

Rage suffused Henry’s face as he confronted the handsome knight who was almost a head shorter than him. “Any good reason why you felt the need to kill our advisor?”

Roger glared his hatred at Sin. “He killed my father in cold blood and yet you reward him like some treasured hound. ’Tis obscene the way no one dares make him pay for what he’s done.”

Henry’s eyes narrowed dangerously. “We understand you are upset, but we stringently advise you to counsel that tongue, lest you find our wrath falling full force onto your head.”

Roger stepped back and turned his chastised gaze to the floor.

Henry glanced to Sin. “Is it true? Did you kill his father?”

Callie saw pain flare in Sin’s eyes a moment before he shielded it.

Sin shrugged. “How would I know? I never knew my victims’ names.”

By Sin’s expression, she could tell he did remember their faces. There was such a haunted look to him that she had no doubt it troubled him still.

“See?” Roger snarled. “He doesn’t deny it. I want justice for my family.”

“Justice, sir, or were you after a more selfish end?” The words left her mouth before she realized she’d spoken.

Suddenly all the men turned to look at her.

Callie shifted nervously. “I was told you came to kill him so that one of you could marry me and put down my people.”

“You lie!”

Henry cocked a brow at her words. “How do you know this?”

“Their plot was overheard by someone I trust.”

Sin was stunned by her words. In the whole of his
life, no one had ever defended him. He was so used to being cast out and left to his own ends that her actions baffled him.

Now her sudden appearance in the throne room made sense. “Is this why you came here?”

She nodded. “I wanted to forewarn you.”

He stood in complete disbelief.

Henry narrowed his eyes on Roger. “A witness to your plot, Roger. What say you now?”

“There was another conspirator as well,” Callie said.

Henry looked to Sin.

“Aye,” Sin concurred reluctantly, “Thomas of Wallingford. He ran off.”

Henry sent his guard in search of the man. His eyes cold, he looked to Roger and instructed his other guard. “Send him to the tower. We shall deal with him later.”

Once the three of them were alone, the king approached Callie with one arched brow. “By your actions, may we assume you will abide by your marriage?”

“Might I speak alone with Lord Sin on the matter, Majesty?”

Henry focused a suspicious stare on her, but ultimately allowed them to leave his presence.

Sin led her from the throne room and down the hall to a set of stairs. They walked along in silence until Sin took her to a courtyard behind the keep.

The small area was surrounded by gray stone walls that were covered in ivy and honeysuckle. It was a peaceful afternoon, with nary a sound to intrude on them.

Callie watched him stand proudly before her, his dark hair falling becomingly over his face. Lord Sin was a dangerously handsome man. One who could devastate a woman with nothing more than a simple smile. She couldn’t help wondering what it would be like to be held by him. To taste those lips on hers.

She shouldn’t be having such thoughts of him, and yet she couldn’t quite stop herself.

He clasped his hands behind his back and eyed her a bit impatiently. “Well?”

Callie sorted through her jumbled emotions as best she could. “May I be honest with you?”

“I certainly prefer it to dishonesty.”

She smiled at that. He was such an odd man.

“I…” She paused as she searched her mind for the best way to broach her concerns.

“You…?”

She fidgeted with the sleeve of her gown. She knew so little of this man that she wasn’t sure what to say.

Finally she lifted her chin and did what she did best. She blurted it out. “You and your king have asked me to bind myself eternally to you. To entrust my life and my people into your hands. I wanted you to know that I take my oaths very seriously. And if we are to do this, then I wish to spend a little time getting to know you.”

Sin opened his mouth to tell her of his plan to find the Raider and leave her in peace, then paused.

She would never agree to his going home with her to hand one of her people over to Henry, or worse, kill him. If she had any intention of doing that, the rebel leader would already be on his way to London.

Nay, he would have to let her think he was agreeable to this match. “Very well,” he said. “How do you suggest we get to know one another before the morrow?”

“Will you dine with me this evening? Here. Just the two of us?”

He arched a brow at that. “Us alone?”

“And Aelfa, of course. But no one else.”

It was a strange request she made. Yet he could see no harm in humoring her. “What time?”

“Vespers?”

He nodded. “I shall see you then.”

Callie watched him leave her. For the first time, she noticed the way he walked. Like a stalking lion waiting for a predator to jump out at him.

He was a fierce man, this knight. Fierce and lonely.

And soon to be her husband.

Swallowing at the thought, she went to make preparations for the night.

Sin was alone in his room, sitting at his desk, when he heard a knock at the door. “Enter.”

He half expected it to be Caledonia, so when Simon entered, it surprised him.

“What brings you here?” Sin asked as Simon closed the door and leaned against it.

“I was wondering when we’d be leaving for Scotland. I wanted to send word to Draven. I thought we could stop in for a short visit, since Ravenswood is on the way.”

Sin let out a slow breath. “I truly appreciate your offer, Simon, but I have no intention of taking you with me.”

“You need someone to go with you.”

“I need no one. I assure you, I will be fine.”

Simon crossed his arms over his chest as he eyed Sin speculatively. “Do you remember what you said to me the first night you came to Ravenswood?”

“Nay. I barely recall that night.”

“I asked you if you were afraid of being so far from your family. You said that you had no family. That you belonged nowhere and to no one. Do you remember it now?”

Sin shrugged. “Vaguely.”

“Well, it seems to me the man before me is still that nine-year-old boy who stood defiantly before Harold. You still have one shoulder braced to take a blow while your hand is curled into a fist to strike back.”

Pain assailed Sin as unwanted memories rushed through him. He’d spent the better part of his life trying to forget the very things Simon wanted him to remember, and the last thing he wanted was to dredge up such horrors.

“Simon, is there a point to this?”

“Aye, there is. When Draven and I tried to befriend you, you would say nothing to us. You drew into yourself even worse than Draven did. He at least kept himself open to me. But you…you refused all comfort.”

Sin held his silence. He had never refused comfort. It was simply forbidden to him. Every time Harold had caught him speaking to Draven or Simon, he had been punished for it. Harold had despised him with a passionate zeal. Older than both Draven and Simon, Sin had never had a protector.

Sin had always been alone. There had never been choice in the matter.

“I want to go with you, Sin. Haven’t you spent enough of your life with nothing but enemies at your back?”

Sin sighed. “You know you don’t owe me for what I did.”

“I know that. It’s not why I want to go.”

Sin frowned at that. He would never understand Simon’s mind. “Then why? Why would you want to spend a week’s time journeying to a land where they will despise you?”

“Because they tell me a friend of mine is going there alone.”

Sin shook his head. Simon was a strange man. Inside, he knew Simon had no business going along. The man had no idea what they were in for. But Sin did.

He was used to it. But Simon…Simon was a fool to want to do this.

“Well?” Simon prompted.

“We leave day after tomorrow.”

Simon nodded. “Good. I shall send my squire home to his parents until I return.” Simon pushed himself away from the door. He had a devilish gleam in his eyes. “I
will
return, won’t I?”

“Only if you learn not to annoy me. Otherwise I might just feed you to the Scots myself.”

Laughing, Simon opened the door. “By the way, I learned from the lady’s maid that her favorite color is green.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Just thought you might want to know. I’ll be around if you need me.”

Sin leaned back in his chair as he thought about everything Simon had said.

It was a cold place, his world. He spent his days tending whatever matters Henry needed and his nights alone in his room listening for the next attack.

He wondered why today that bothered him when it never had before. He’d merely accepted it as fact.