Breaking Clear (Full Hearts Series Book 3) (17 page)

“Oh, I don’t know if it’s quite the same thing. Your wife left you because you were so generous that you were willing to sacrifice your own home to take care of other people. You’re a hero. And I’m just the trash next door that you should stay away from.”

Evan’s eyes narrowed at her. “You’re not trash, Harper. I don’t ever want you to say that again. And I’m certainly no hero. I made my choices knowing how things would turn out. I ended up broke and alone.”

“You had a downfall but you bounced back in record time. I’ll always be the daughter of that woman who left her family for a teenage boy. And now I’m sleeping with you, but at the same time I’m planning to leave as soon as I can. What does that say about me?”

“It says that you know what you want and you’re not letting anyone else define who you are. It would be one thing if you were lying to me about what you want, but you’ve been honest from the start. I knew what I was getting into and, quite frankly, the fact that you don’t want more is what makes this work. We can have this simple, beautiful, sexy relationship and then move on, happy that we had it.”

“But what you don’t see is that it’s not normal for a woman to want to live like this. I’m supposed to want the ring and the house with the white picket fence.”

“Why should you want that? Just because everyone else thinks you should? Fuck them. I had that once and I can tell you it’s not what it’s cracked up to be. We’ve got it right, Harper. You and I have it all figured out. The only thing that is going to ruin what we’ve got here is letting other people’s opinions get into our heads.”

Harper stared at him for a moment, digesting his words. “You’re right. I shouldn’t let it get to me. I never think like this when I’m in New York. There’s just something about being back here, especially this time. When I used to come back for quick visits, at least I had an impressive career to go back to. But what do I have now to feel good about?”

“Feel good about how generous you are. You’ve only been in town for a few weeks and already you’re doing charity work. Plus, look at why you’re here in the first place. How many people would give up everything to care for their father?”

“Most people,” she said, trying to pull her hand away.

Evan tightened his grip. “No. Most people would hire help or pawn it off on someone else. You’re different. You’re better. You’re an incredibly beautiful, thoroughly impressive woman. And it’s got nothing to do with what you’ve managed to accomplish in your career,” he said, his words growing thick with emotion. “You’re not only one of the most thoughtful people I know, you’re also the most fun woman I’ve ever met. Not to mention sexy as hell. And for what it’s worth, I love that you’re here and that I get to be with you. It makes me one of the luckiest guys on the planet.”

The moment was interrupted by the waiter bringing them their food. Harper was grateful for his arrival. She needed to slow her racing pulse. For one horribly delicious moment, she had thought Evan was about to say he loved her. What had gotten her heart beating so furiously was her own reaction. In the tiny instant that hung between the words
love
and
that
, she felt a thrill she’d never experienced before. And the realization terrified her. She wanted him to love her. But he didn’t. And he wasn’t going to.

She heard Evan thank the waiter as her mind returned to her surroundings. She needed to shake it off. She couldn’t let herself hope for a future with him, not when it wasn’t what either of them was capable of. That meant this would have to end. And she was nowhere near ready to end it. She was suddenly overcome by the need to remind herself that this was just about sex. She couldn’t be out on a romantic date with him. This felt too serious. She reached across to touch his arm. “Let’s get out of here right now. I need to be naked with you.”

Evan gave her a quizzical look. “You sure?”

“I’m sure. It’s exactly what I want. Now.” She gave him a look that was pure lust.

Flagging down the waiter, Evan asked him, “Can we get this wrapped up? And the bill as quickly as possible?”

*     *     *

“I’m sorry I ruined your plans for a romantic date,” Harper said as she watched him get into the truck.

“Believe me, I’m okay with it. You can have whatever you need.”

Harper slid across the seat and straddled his lap. “This is what I need.”

She lowered her mouth over his, giving him rough, passionate kisses that he returned. Rubbing herself against him, she could feel how hard he was through his pants. She felt his large hands glide over the silky fabric of her dress, along her waist to her breasts. Squeezing them firmly, he leaned his head back against the seat, letting her come to him as if he needed to check one last time that she wanted this. She moved in closer, pressing her breasts against him. They stayed like that, kissing, caressing, driving each other to the brink, almost forgetting where they were.

“You’re going to get us arrested,” he said finally, trying in vain to hold back.

“You can stop anytime you want,” she replied, licking her lips.

“Then we better hope nobody calls the cops,” he murmured, letting his hand find its way under her dress, finding her naked, hot and wet. He groaned with desire as his palm covered her warm flesh.

Harper reached down, tugging his shirttail out of his pants and unbuckling his belt. Frantically unzipping his pants, she pulled them down as he lifted his hips to help her. There was nothing between them now as he pressed his smooth, hard length against her. He guided himself inside her as she lowered herself over him, taking in every inch he had to give. She squeezed her tight sex around him, drenching him as she ground back and forth on his lap.

“Oh God, Harper, you’re so fucking hot,” he told her, his words increasing her wild desire. She picked up her pace, moving more forcefully now. He was in so deep, nothing could be better than this. She revelled in the feeling of his powerful hands gripping her hips as he took control, slowing her to tortuously long drags now. She watched as he looked down at her full breasts, his hands raking her back and forth on his lap. But when his gaze turned to her eyes, it was full of adoration. Shutting her eyes tightly, she tried to forget that look. Forget the part of her that wished he was in love with her.
This is just sex, it means nothing
, she told herself over and over.

She gave herself over to the lie, releasing her fears and just allowing herself to feel the pleasure of what he was doing to her, in her. He pressed her down onto his lap even harder, their bodies becoming one explosive mass of flesh and bone. He covered her mouth with his as she started to come, muffling the sounds of ecstasy erupting from her throat.

When it was over, he drew her close to him as they recovered. “Wow, Harper. What was that about?”

“I don’t know,” she answered. “I just needed to have you.”

*     *     *

An hour later, they lay tangled together in Evan’s sheets. They’d gone straight to bed when they arrived home, stripping each other’s clothes off the moment they got in the door. Now the moon had risen in the sky, and by the time they’d had their fill of each other, it provided their only light.

“I think I’ll have to take you out for dinner more often,” Evan said, lazily running a finger along her side.

“Agreed. That was amazing.” Harper’s stomach let out a loud growl, interrupting the moment.

“Now that I’ve satisfied your lust, I should satisfy your hunger.” He got up and pulled on a pair of grey lounge pants, then tossed her one of his T-shirts. “Let’s eat.”

A few minutes later, they sat side by side at the kitchen table, swirling noodles with forks and sipping ice-cold water by the light over the stove.

“Even reheated, this is delicious.” Harper picked up her glass and took a long gulp. “Thank you for taking me out tonight, Evan. This might have been my favourite meal of all time. I especially enjoyed the course between the bread and the main.”

“Hands down. Best. Meal. Ever.” He grinned over at her and rested his hand on her knee.

Harper returned his smile, plucking the last prawn off his plate with her fork and popping it into her mouth.

“My last prawn? That’s just evil! I was saving it for the end!”

Harper covered her mouth as she laughed. “Sorry, it sat there so long that I thought you didn’t want it.”

“No, I always save my favourite thing on the plate for the last bite.” He shook his head at her. “Why would I have ordered prawns if I didn’t like them?”

“Good point. I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you had that whole ‘saving the best for last’ thing going on. Won’t happen again.” She planted an apology kiss on his cheek. “I would offer you some of mine but I know how much you hate mushrooms.”

“That’s okay. I’m sure you’ll make it up to me.”

“Sure. You think of a way and I’ll consider making it up to you.” She gave him a sideways glance.

“You don’t sound that sorry.” Evan’s voice was incredulous.

“I’m not that sorry. That prawn was delicious. Like, ‘melt in your mouth’ delicious.” Harper laughed out loud as Evan tickled her in retribution.

“Okay! I give!” She laughed. “I’ll make it up to you!”

“Good. Because my fingers have a lot more tickling in them yet.”

“How about a naked massage?”

“Done. And please note that you may always eat my last bite if that is how you pay me back.”

*     *     *

An hour later, they both flopped back down onto the bed, glistening with sweat, wearing only satisfied expressions.

“So, are we even?” Harper asked.

“And then some,” Evan answered, pulling the covers over them before lying back on his pillow. He ran a finger down the centre of her chest. “Tell me one thing I don’t know about you. Something you’ve never told anyone.”

“Oh God, that’s a tough one. Let me think . . .” She stared at the ceiling for a minute. “Okay, this one is really embarrassing, so I’m going to need to hear something of equal or greater value. If I don’t, there will be consequences,” she said, trying to sound ominous.

“No problem. I’ve done lots of stupid shit in my life.”

Harper laughed. “True. Okay, then. When I started at
Style
, I was a lowly intern, fresh out of design school. After a few weeks, I was graced by being in the same room as Cybill Hart for a few minutes, but of course it couldn’t have happened at the right time.”

“Naturally.”

“I knew who she was, obviously, but I had never expected to meet her in person. Anyway, I was in the closet—that’s what we call this enormous room filled with row after row of racks jammed with clothes. I was supposed to be putting away a rack that had been used for a shoot that day. It was late, no one was around—or so I thought—so I decided to try something on. I had my eye on this gorgeous Valentino gown—it was a black silk duchesse with these delicate, hand-painted flowers. I stripped down and slid it on, but it was probably a size two, so there was no way I was going to be able to zip it up. I barely managed to squeeze into it and had to leave it open at the back. I was standing in front of the mirror admiring myself when who did I see standing behind me?”

“Cybill.”

“Mmhmm. I was so humiliated and terrified, I think my whole body turned red. I started making all these apologies and excuses while I hurried over to this curtained-off area to take off the dress, only I was stuck. I had shimmied myself in and now I couldn’t slide the straps off.”

“Oh shit.” Evan laughed.

“That’s exactly what I was thinking as I stood in the dressing area, sweating all over this ten-thousand-dollar gown, wishing I could hide under a rock for the rest of my life. I was sure my career was over.”

“So why wasn’t it?”

“Turns out she shouldn’t have been in their either. She’d been in one of the aisles when I came in, and let’s just say it wasn’t her husband who had his hands all over her ass. She thought I had seen them. The next morning she came and found me and did the whole ‘I didn’t see you if you didn’t see me’ thing.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, in the end I think it actually might have helped my career, since I proved I could keep my mouth shut. She got divorced a year later, though.”

“Wow. Crazy. But I have to know, how’d you get out of the dress?”

“I waited in the closet for an hour, then managed to find another intern and begged her to help me wriggle my way out of it. I had marks on my shoulders from those straps for two days.”

Evan chuckled. “Can you describe that in more detail? Starting with what the other intern looked like?”

Harper laughed, giving him a light smack on the arm. “Alright, you’re up.”

“Up for what?” Evan asked, trying his best to seem authentically confused.

“You know exactly what. You owe me one embarrassing story.” Harper pursed her lips at him.

“Oh, right.”

“Were you hoping I’d forget?”

“Maybe.”

“You should know me better than that by now, Donovan.”

“Alright, I guess I owe you one. Hmm. Oh! The first time I had supper at Avery’s parents’ house. That’s a classic. But you have to promise not to tell anyone.”

“That bad? Ooh, yay!” she exclaimed.

“So you can imagine how nervous I was to be going there. Went out and bought new clothes, picked up a ridiculously large bouquet of flowers for her mom, and then I must have spent over half an hour staring at labels on wine bottles, trying to pick the right one on my way over. When I got back in my car—I had just leased a little black Porsche at the time—”

“Nice.” Harper interjected.

“It was. Anyway, when I got back in the car I realized I was going to be late. A total no-no when you meet the parents. I jump in and zoom over, weaving in and out of traffic, running yellow lights, basically driving like a total asshole. So I go in, give her mom the flowers and the wine and notice that her dad’s not at the door to greet me. A couple of minutes later he comes in the door, looking thoroughly pissed off. He points at me and says, ‘You!’

“I didn’t know what to do so I extended my hand and said, ‘Good evening, sir,’ trying to think of why he could possibly be so angry with me. He says, ‘Don’t
sir
me, and don’t think you are ever going to be driving my daughter around in that little death trap of yours!’”