Broken Souls (5 page)

She looked at the kind hearted man before her. She knew that his reaction over Gabby was just his way of releasing grief. He didn't mean any of his
earlier words. He was just here to try and help.

“
Yes,” Ashley replied. “I can’t talk about it yet. I really think that the best thing would be for you to perhaps leave for today.”

Ben nodded.
“I understand. I just want you to know that I will always be here for you, Ashley. I know that people handle things differently, so I want you to know that it is okay for you to be feeling like this right now. You will eventually come around, and when you do, I'll be waiting for you.”

At this
point, the hardened exterior that Ashley was clinging to was struggling to stay intact. Her emotions swelled and bubbled within her body, desperately trying to find an opening to escape from. She continued to push them down, but was finding it extremely difficult the more Ben talked.

“Please, don't come to work tomorrow. I'm authorising a week of holiday for you, starting from now. I will ask one of the girls on reception to reschedule Gabby's patients and transfer them over to Patrick and myself in the interim,” Ben said, turning his back on her and walking into the hallway.

“
Thank you,” she replied gratefully.

With his hand poised on the front door latch, Ben took a deep breath.
“Just... please forget about work for now, okay? You don’t need to be thinking about that on top of everything else.” He turned the latch and opened the door. Without turning back, he stepped into the corridor and closed the door firmly behind him.

Every part of
Ashley's body trembled from head to toe as she stared transfixed at her front door. A feeling of nausea rumbled in the pit of her stomach after watching Ben leave. Things were starting to become tricky between them. The realisation settled upon her like a black cloud, sucking the life from her mind and body within seconds. She wasn’t sure if it was another relationship that was potentially reaching its expiration date before it had got going. She didn’t know if they would survive a blow this big to their lives.

It was upsetting to think that things were rocky between them. Even though s
he had warned herself from the start not to over think things, it had been too easy for her to do with Ben. He was good looking, caring and kind. The man had the words ‘Future Husband Material’ practically tattooed across his forehead.

But he wasn’t Marco.

Ashley startled as the loud beeps from the smoke alarm suddenly echoed throughout the flat. Sniffing the air, she wrinkled her nose.

“
Bugger!” she shouted, her eyes widening as she remembered the bacon cooking in the kitchen.

Dashing along the hall, she battled
through the plumes of billowing black smoke as she stepped into the kitchen. Locating the frying pan on the hob, she quickly turned off the gas and submerged the pan into the bowl of washing up water in the sink. Flicking on the extractor fan, she tried to get rid of the smoke before the smoke alarm that was noisily beeping prompted attention from other residents in the building.

Today was clearly
going to be as bad as she was already feeling.

“So what do we think ladies? Do we think that this fine specimen of a male should take off his shirt for your delight? How about I hear you all make some noise!”

Ashley
scoffed and wrapped the blanket around her shoulders.

“
Alright, calm yourselves. Number two, can you please take off your shirt?”

She hummed with approval and threw another piece of popcorn into her mouth as the hunky man on the television placed his hands on the collar of his t-shirt and ripped. He placed his hands into the pockets of his jeans and grinned widely at the camera
once he had bared his torso.

Ashley rolled her eyes and picked up another handful of popcorn.
“Number two, you think you are something. Well, you have got nice abs I suppose... Shame you are boring me now.”

Picking up the television remote, she flicked over onto another Sunday evening reality show, hoping that it was going to keep her entertained for another ten or fifteen minutes until the need to change the channel arose again.

She had been in this cycle ever since she had distinguished the near fire in the kitchen this morning. Collapsing in front of the television with as much junk food as she could lay her hands on appeared to be the easiest option in trying to distract her mind.

Although, s
itting in the same position at seven thirty in the evening with various empty food containers littering the coffee table and floor was not something Ashley was proud of. She knew however, that this was the only cure for her to stop the grief from creeping in. She had to occupy her thoughts. Whether it was with food or television, she had to do something.

A thought crossed her mind
as she recalled this morning's incident with Ben. Immediately, she picked up her phone.

“
Ashley, is everything alright?” She heard Ben’s anxious voice.

“
You said earlier that you were going to reassign patients over to you and Patrick in the interim. Do you mean... until you have found a replacement for G-Gabby?” She tried to soften her words as much as possible, trying not to come across as hostile and snappy as she could have. She was just slightly amazed that Ben was already thinking about finding a replacement so soon.

“
Look, Ashl—”

She noted the
sound of exhaustion in his voice. “But it’s so soon, Ben?” she said, struggling to understand how he could just forget about her so quickly and move on. “You were so broken earlier, but you’re still talking about replacements?” The bowl of popcorn on her lap rolled onto the side, sending kernels flying over the sofa cushions. She pulled her knees under her chin and stayed quiet.

“
Of course something will need to be done. We do still have a business to run, Ashley. We have bills and employees to pay.”

“
It has been less than twenty-four hours. How are we supposed to just carry on like nothing has even happened?” She was getting worked up. The emotions inside were starting to bubble and spill over like hot lava. It was a struggle for her to cope, she wanted to just breakdown into tears at every mention of Gabby’s name.

“
Why are you doing this to yourself? Listen to you... Do you think that Gabby would want you to be this way? You are going to make yourself ill, do you understand? I feel like you are trying to shut me out.”

Ashley couldn’t contain the overwhelming pain that was controlling her body. “B-Ben, I’ve got to go,” she whimpered, disconnecting the call and throwing it onto the sofa beside her.

It was understandable that they had to think about their business, but she just couldn’t wrap her head around it all. Especially since Ben and Patrick had been friends with Gabby since university, thus the reason why they all went into the partnership with the dental practice. It just hurt her that he could talk so easily about finding a replacement for her so soon.

Ashley put
her chin on her knees and allowed the volcano of emotions to finally erupt. Tears clouded her vision as the image of Gabby's orange bodycon dress filled her head. She replayed the entire evening's memory over and over in her head.

They were getting
ready to go out to celebrate. It was all so clear in her mind. Closing her eyes, she continued to work through the story, one heartbreaking frame at a time.

The queue around the outside of the club.

Gabby charging up the road.

Ashley's phone call with Ben.

And then...

“
No, no, no,” Ashley cried as the image of Gabby's lifeless body crashed through the fog. She felt the wind being knocked from her lungs as the memory fully surfaced and fused into place.

The ambulance.

The sirens.

The hospital
.

A loud thud
on the front door rumbled throughout the living room, sending Ashley to her feet in a startled panic. “H-H-Hello?” she called, unsure of who would be at her door on Sunday evening.

“
Cara?”

Her voice cracked as she wiped the tears from her face
. “M-Marco?”

“
Si
.
”

A gasp left her lips as she hurried to open the front door.
“I'm coming,” she called, fumbling with the latch and deadbolts. She managed to get the door open, but what she found was not as expected.

Marco
seemed weak and limp, his body weight being supported against the wall on the opposite side of the hallway. She noted his ashen face and bloodshot eyes. Skimming further down his body, she saw that he was still wearing the same clothes from last night, and that there was a smell radiating off of him.

Ashley sniffed in disgust as she caught his scent of sweat and stale alcohol.
She wiped her swollen red eyes with the back of her hand. “What happened to you?”

He
grunted in response as he tried to steady himself away from the wall, his arms flailing wildly as he fought to keep his balance.

“
Wait, let me help you,” she said, coming forward to wrap one of his arms over her shoulder. She tried to take some of his weight, but her petite frame struggled. He was a lot heavier than she expected.

“
I'm fine,” he grumbled, shrugging out of her grasp. He stumbled on his first steps alone, but was then able to find support in the wooden door frame. Gripping it tightly, he held up his body weight and staggered into the flat.

Ashley closed the door behind them and followed the stench of alcohol into the living room. She watched on with complete astonishment as a heavily intoxicated Marco attempted to manoeuvre about the flat. Aside from the falter in his steps, she was surprised to find how at home he was making himself.

Finding comfort on her sofa, Marco hadn't wasted any time in removing his suit jacket and shoes. Dumping them on the floor beside him, he swept away the discarded popcorn kernels and lay back against the cushions, placing his hands behind his head. He studied the room, his eyes drifting across the various photo frames and canvas pictures that adorned the surfaces and walls.

Despite the friendship they had built over the years,
Marco had never actually flown to London for a visit. He was always so busy with his boutique that he was never able to take time off to come and see them. Instead, he always made sure to Skype and invite Gabby over to Italy during the holidays so that they could spend time together. Ashley had also been included in those invites, but had never chosen to go. She felt uncomfortable about the idea. Almost like the third wheel if she had gone along on the brother / sister holiday.

T
heir parents had already passed away. It was one of the first heart to heart conversations Gabby and Ashley had both had in the early stages of their friendship. It was at that point, she understood how important her best friend's relationship with her brother was. They were both the only family each other had remaining, and she didn’t want to interfere with that.

“
I knew her home would look beautiful in person,” Marco murmured, taking in the open plan kitchen and living room. “It may be simple, but it has a nice personal touch to it,” he said, his eyes focusing on a particular canvas picture across the room.

Ashley noted
a slur to his voice. “Have you slept since…?” She looked to the ground and avoided contact with his eyes. She didn't want to come out and just say it so simply.

“
I like that picture,” he mumbled, ignoring her question completely.

She looked up to see him nodding towards the canvas photo above the firep
lace. “Me too,” she smiled sadly.

He had chosen a picture that meant a great deal to both her and Gabby. Taken shortly after
they had first met at a training course, it was a photo that symbolised great friendship and a positive looking future. They had decided to hang it in their living room as a reminder of the start of their journey and that they were to always look at the brighter side of things. So far, it had always served its purpose; but now that she was looking at it following Gabby's death, she felt that it had a new meaning.

It provided her w
ith a different outlook on life. It gave her something to push for and to treasure. She knew that it was true when people said that life was too short. She was living proof of that having lost two people closest in her life.

“
Cara,
are you alright?” Marco slurred, noticing the moisture dampening her cheeks.

Wiping her face, Ashley
nodded. “I think I’m going to go to my room. It’s up to you if you want to sleep on the sofa tonight or...” Her eyes drifted to the door of Gabby's room. “I mean, I’m assuming that you are staying over?”

Understandably, Ashley was feeling a little apprehensive about having Marc
o staying in the flat with her. Their relationship over the past few years had never strayed further than a friendly Skype call every few days when he was online with Gabby. And although she had always held a soft spot for him, she was starting to notice that the more time they were spending together, the more her feelings towards him were starting to skew and morph into something more.

“
I’m going to make some coffee and have a shower. Goodnight,” he replied, watching her carefully.

~

Ashley choked back a sob as the paramedic lifted Gabby’s body into the back of the ambulance. Gripping onto her best friend’s hand, she tried to fight against the tears that threatened to fall.

“
You are going to be alright, babe. You are going to be just fine.” She continued to repeat this over and over as she squeezed Gabby’s hand on the way to the hospital. “They are going to help you and you are going to get better.”

They were greeted by a flurry of people after they arrived at the hospital.

“
Miss, we need you to step aside so that we can take her out of the ambulance,” a paramedic asked, gesturing towards a seat for her to sit in.

Ashley hopped out behind the paramedics and followed them into a long
, sterile looking hallway that never seemed to end.
“
Gabby, I’m right behind you,” she called out, trying her best to keep up with them.

The wheels on the hospital trolley clacked loudly as the paramedics picked up speed,
and started to practically run along the corridor. Ashley felt tightness in her chest as she struggled to keep up with their pace.

“
I-I can't keep up,” she panted, bending over to catch her breath. She paused for a few seconds before straightening up and looking for the crowd of people and the hospital trolley.

It was gone.

“
Gabby?” Her voice sounded suddenly panicked as her steps turned into a sprint.
“
Gabby?” She continued to run along the corridor, watching as it continuously extended before her eyes. It was never going to end... they had disappeared, and they had taken her best friend with them.

“Get out of the way please!”

Ashley was pushed to the side as another trolley was rushed past her. There was just a thin sheet covering the patient’s body, but the face was left visible. Recognition hit her as she caught glimpses of the young girl whose face and head were bloodied.

“Issy!” Ashley cried, sinking to her knees as yet another s
warm of paramedics disappeared down the long and sterile corridor that didn’t seem to end. They had taken two of the people in the world that she had truly loved. It wasn’t fair... at all.

Beep. Beep.

Beep. Beep.

A blood curdling scream erupted from the back of Ashley's throat. She clutche
d her duvet cover as she sat bolt upright and pushed her body back into the headboard. Tremors wracked her body from head to toe as she began to sob uncontrollably.

It was beginning; she could feel it brewing.

“No, no, no, no.” She shook her head to try and disperse the thoughts from her mind. She couldn't fall back into the black hole again like last time. She had to try and stay strong. She could fight this... she knew that she could do it.