Burn Out (11 page)

“You know I could
never leave you,” he said, squeezing her leg.

She looked at the
hand resting on her leg before she turned her attention to his face. “I like
you a lot, but I think we both know the reason our relationship hasn’t evolved
the way you hoped it would.” She sighed. “We just don’t have the chemistry.”
She could see the tension in his jaw, and she knew he would try disputing her
statement.

“You haven’t even
given us a chance. You’re still hung up on that guy, and until you’re willing
to move on, no one else can give you what you need.”

“You may be
right.” She set her hand on top of his hand. “I want closure, and I hope that’s
what this trip will give Evan and me, but it still doesn’t change things
between us. I have to believe if you and I were going to develop feelings for
each other, we would have by now.”

“How the hell do
you expect to develop feelings for me when you’re sleeping with him?”

Luc, sitting
across the aisle, raised an eyebrow at Jeff’s sharp tone.

She smiled at
Evan’s father and said between clenched teeth, “Would you keep your voice down?
The whole world doesn’t need to know my business.”

“You think they
don’t know already?” he said, gesturing to the people seated around the plane.
“He’s here to get you back, and as far as they’re concerned, I’m the only
obstacle in the way. They don’t want me here anymore than he does.”

“That’s not true,”
she whispered. “We’re all here for one reason: to see our good friends get
married. This has nothing to do with you.” She’d accused Evan of being
self-centered, but she was beginning to realize Jeff shared the same trait.

“What did he say
to you earlier?” he asked, shifting in his seat to face her. “When he hauled
you away from your friends?”

Erika didn’t see
any reason to hide the truth from him. “He said he’s changed, that he wants to
prove it to me.” She would give anything for that to be true, to have a second
chance at the life she’d always wanted with a man she still loved with her
whole heart, but she couldn’t allow herself to believe his empty promises
again. Pinning all of her dreams on him had almost destroyed her last time.
This time she was smarter and stronger and she refused to believe his lies.

“That guy would
say whatever you want to hear to get you back.” He looked disgusted when he
said, “But as soon as he had you, things would go back to the way they were.
You’d spend all of your time alone, waiting for him to come home, arguing with
him because he forgot to call or he missed an important date-”

“You don’t have to
remind me why it didn’t work out with Evan. I haven’t forgotten how bad things
were.” And no matter how hard Evan tried, he wouldn’t be able to make her
forget.

***

Evan watched Erika
from across the table, the candlelight casting a glow over her beautiful face
as the gentle ocean breeze teased her hair. She seemed happy, carefree, as she
laughed and traded stories with their friends, but he knew she was uneasy with
the man at her side vying for her attention while her ex-lover stared them
down.

It killed Evan to
watch her with someone else. Even though he knew they’d never been intimate, he
questioned whether she might be willing to settle for a marriage built on a
foundation of trust and mutual respect if it meant she could spare her heart.

“So, how are
things at work, Ev?” Nick asked, bringing the beer glass to his lips.

Evan saw Erika’s
eyes drift to him, waiting for his response.

He didn’t take his
eyes off her as he said, “Actually, I’m in the process of makin’ some changes.
Tryin’ to make time for a life.”

Nick laughed as he
slapped him on the back. “It’s about time. You know what they say about all
work and no play.”

“I was the one who
suggested it,” Ryan said, linking his hand with Brianna’s. “I hate seein’ him
work himself to death.”

“You’re right,”
Evan said, still looking at Erika. “Some things are more important than work.”

Dominic clutched
his chest and grinned. “Damn, I never thought I’d hear you say that, Spencer.”

“Neither did I,”
Erika said, quietly. “Of course, saying it and doing it are two different
things, aren’t they?” She brought the wine glass to her lips and broke eye
contact.

“I guess the proof
will be in the steps I take to make it happen, right?” He folded his hands over
his stomach. “You may not believe me yet, but I promise you I am gonna make it
happen.”

“How do you plan
to do that?” Jeff asked, glaring at him. “You gonna become a man of leisure?
Live off your daddy’s fortune?”

Evan was sorely
tempted to lunge across the table and throttle the man, but he didn’t want to
ruin the week his friends had worked so hard to plan. “Living off someone
else’s hard work wouldn’t satisfy me,” Evan said, staring him down. “That may
work for you, but I need to challenge myself.”

The color rose in
Jeff’s cheeks as he gripped the armrests of his iron chair. “For your
information, Erika couldn’t get along at that clinic without me. I’m always
there to support her, which is a hell of a lot more than I can say for you.
Where were you when she needed you, Spencer?” He pretended to contemplate his
question. “That’s right, you were only worried about how you were gonna make
your next mil provin’ to the world you were more than just your old man’s
lackey.”

Erika grabbed his
arm. “Please, don’t do this.”

Dom chuckled as he
rubbed his hands together. “This has been long overdue if you ask me.”

Evan smirked at
his best friend’s reaction. Dom loved a good fight and was often the one to
instigate them back in college.

Lena rolled her
eyes at her fiancé. “Can we all pretend to be adults so they don’t throw us out
of here on the very first night?”

“Sorry, Lena,”
Evan said, raising his hand. “It won’t happen again.”

“Excuse me,” Erika
said, pushing her chair back.

Evan didn’t waste
any time getting to his feet as he followed her down the path to the beach.

“Why don’t you
just back off?” Jeff asked.

Evan turned to
look at the man over his shoulder. “I could ask you the same question.”

Erika strolled
along the beach trying to catch her breath. It was closing in on midnight, and
she was tired. She should have simply excused herself and retreated to her
room, but she’d always been drawn to water when she was trying to work out her
problems.

She wasn’t
surprised when Evan fell in to step beside her. “What do you want?” she asked,
pulling her wrap around skirt up to her knees so it didn’t trail in the water
as they walked along the shore line.

“I just wanted to
tell you I’m sorry for mixin’ it up with him back there. I didn’t mean to make
you uncomfortable.”

Gazing out at the
stars, she admitted, “I shouldn’t have brought him.”

“Why did you?” he
asked, slipping his hands into the pockets of the shorts he’d changed into when
they arrived at the resort.

“Maybe I didn’t
trust myself to be alone with you for a whole week,” she said, knowing he
already knew the reason she’d brought Jeff along. “I’m kind of ashamed to admit
I needed him as a buffer.”

“Did he know
that’s why you were bringin’ him?”

She ran her hands
over her upper arms. It was a beautiful night, but the breeze blowing in off
the ocean made it feel considerably cooler. “I think so.” He put his arm around
her and she let him pull her against his body as they walked. She’d always felt
so safe in his arms, and she suspected that would never change.

“Did you tell him
about what happened between us the other night?”

“Yes.”

“How did he take
it?”

“He wasn’t happy
about it.” She focused on the sand under her feet instead of her body’s
reaction to his touch. Falling back into bed with him would be so easy, but she
knew that would only give him false hope.

“You know he
doesn’t belong here. This week is about Dom and Lena. We could have a great
time together, just like old times. Why don’t I have the jet take him home?”

Evan was so used
to people bending to his will, but she refused to allow him to sway her. “I
can’t do that. He’s my friend and co-worker. I asked him here to spend the week
with me. If you don’t like it, that’s your problem.”

The hand on her
arm clenched, but he didn’t respond as they walked a few more feet in silence.
“I meant what I said earlier. I’m makin’ some changes at Titan.”

“Don’t do it for
my benefit, Evan. It won’t matter what you do; we’re not getting back
together.”

“Who said I’m
doin’ it for you?”

Ouch.
“If you’re doing it for yourself, I’m happy
for you. It’s not healthy to work so much.”

“Yeah, besides I’m
thinkin’ it might be time to slow down. Buy the house, adopt the dog, find a
wife, have a couple of kids. You know, all the things we used to talk about.”

Her stomach
clenched as she imagined some other woman living
her
life. Pulling away
and stepping another foot closer to the water’s edge so she could feel the
splash of the water gliding over her feet, she said, “I hope you find
everything you’re looking for.”

He stretched his
arms over his head and released a contented sigh. “I will. I’m not worried.”

She glared at him
out of the corner of her eye. Of course he wouldn’t be worried. Women had
thrown themselves at him for as long as she could remember. He’d always been
rich, gorgeous, smart, and sexy, but now he had the impressive title to make
him the ultimate catch. “Just make sure you don’t choose some gold-digger who’s
only after your money,” she muttered.

He laughed. “I
have better taste in women than that, don’t you think?”

She didn’t know if
he was serious or just trying to bait her. Either way, she didn’t like it. “I
don’t know. It’s been a long time since you’ve had to find a girlfriend.
Unless…” She hated herself for asking, but her curiosity wrestled her pride to
the mat and won. “Have you been seeing anyone this past year?”

He shrugged. “I’ve
gone out on a few dates. Nothing serious.” Translation –
I’ve slept with a
few women.

“Are you thinking
one of them might be
the one
?” It pained her to even ask the question,
but if he responded the way she feared he might, at least it would help her
move on.

“I didn’t think
so, but…”

She held her
breath as she waited for him to continue. When he said nothing, she clenched
the soft fabric of her skirt in tight fists and asked, “But?”

“That was before
you made me believe we didn’t have a chance at a future together.”

She narrowed her
eyes at him. “Back at the airport you made it sound like you weren’t ready to
give up on me. What changed your mind?”

“You did,” he
said, brushing a hand across her cheek to remove a strand of hair plastered
across her lips. “I don’t know why, but somethin’ clicked. I laid on the bed in
the plane for a long time thinkin’ about what we had, what I want…”

“And?” She was
determined not to cry. This was a good thing. He was finally willing to let her
go so she could get on with her life. “What do you want?”

“Like I said, I
want to settle down.” He reached for her hand. “We had some amazing years
together, but I know we can’t go back. You can’t trust me with your heart
again, and I understand why, but I hope that doesn’t mean we can’t be friends?”

She swallowed the
lump in her throat, determined not to let him see how much this hurt her. “You
want to be friends?”

“Sure.” He lifted
a shoulder. “You and Lena are still tight. Dom’s my best friend. We’re bound to
cross paths, you know, when Dom and Lena have kids. There’ll be baptisms,
birthday parties, holiday get-togethers. Our lives are linked, whether we like
it or not, right?”

She nodded, not
trusting herself to speak. She was grateful the breeze was drying her tears
before they could fall.

“I think what
happened the other night happened for a reason, so we can both find closure.”
He pulled her into his arms and kissed the top of her head. “I’ll always care
about what happens to you, and you know that if you ever need anything, you can
always call me.”

“I know,” she
whispered, burying her head in his chest. She didn’t expect it to hurt so much,
but this felt more final than the first time they broke up because this time he
was letting her go instead of the other way around.

He tipped her head
up and brushed away the tear that escaped. “Please don’t cry.”

She sniffled. “I
know it’s silly. We’ve been broken up a long time, but…”

“It’s hard to say
good-bye.” He kissed her forehead. “I know, I feel the same way. You deserve to
be happy. I wish I could’ve been the guy to make you happy, but since I’m not,
I hope you find what you’re lookin’ for, baby.” He inclined his head toward the
restaurant at the top of the hill. “Just make sure it’s not with that loser.”