Cake: A Love Story (10 page)

Chapter Four

Jake

What the hell was happening? The last thing I needed in the middle of a tour was a girl, even one as amazing as Casey. I had to stop acting like some horny middle-schooler. I was not myself with Casey. She brought someone out in me that I didn’t recognize. Chatty, flirty…shit, I was ‘this’ close to inviting myself into her room. Not to have sex, but to keep on talking to her. Me? Talking? It certainly wasn’t what I was known for. Usually the less I knew about a girl the better. Made it easier to get her out of my bed afterward. Yeah, it was a douche-bag way of thinking but what can I say? I’d had a fucked up life…emotional attachments had never been my strong suit. But damn, this girl was different than anyone I’d ever met before…I had to get it under control before I did something stupid and crazy…like fall for her.

I maneuvered my way back to my room, avoiding the women who were riding the elevator looking for me. What made it more difficult was that the elevators were see- through glass so I was actually having to duck and hide. I took the stairs and waited until the coast was clear before darting down the hallway to the room I was sharing with Kyle.

As I burst through the door, Kyle looked up at me in surprise, “That was quick. She’s probably not real impressed with your stamina.”

“Shut up,” I shot back, breathing heavily as I sunk down on the sofa next to Keith. “I’m not interested in your annoying commentary right now.”

“Geez…testy.”

“Leave him alone, Kyle,” Keith said then turned to me. “Why are you panting?”

“Why are you here?” I countered. Keith had his own room that he was sharing with his girlfriend, who would be here tomorrow.

“I wasn’t tired. And I wanted a drink. Why are you panting?”

“Dodging fans,” I replied.

“Oh great,” Kyle huffed, rolling his eyes. “Did they follow you here?”

“I don’t know, probably.”

“They better not start knocking.”

“I hope they keep you up all night, asshole,” I derided. I was in a foul mood. The whole thing with Casey had me questioning myself and I didn’t like it one bit.

“Fuck you!” Kyle exclaimed.

“No, fuck you! I can’t believe you did that to me?” I spat at Kyle.

“What? Call over a girl that you’re clearly crushing on? So sorry. Shoot me.”

“I’m not crushing on her. I met her six hours ago. And asking her if she has a boyfriend? Dammit Kyle. Obviously she knew we had been talking about her.”

“So? Now she knows you’re interested.”

“I’m not interested!” I protested loudly.

“Uh-huh,” Kyle said knowingly. He knew me better than any other human on the planet and sometimes I hated the power he had over me.

“Fuck you! I don’t need you playing matchmaker. I can get a girl all on my own.”

“Not with that attitude you can’t,” Kyle joked under his breath.

I glared at him. “I swear to God, Kyle, I’m about to punch you.”

“Okay, okay,” Keith intervened. “Would the two of you shut up for like two seconds? Jesus Christ. You’re giving me a headache.”

Keith took a swig from his beer.

“Where did you get that?” I asked, momentarily forgetting my hate for Kyle.

“In the cooler. Help yourself.”

I got up and grabbed a beer. Leave it to Keith to bring a cooler full of beer to a wedding. First the Jack Daniels and now this? It was the most I’d had to drink in a long time but tonight I really felt like I needed something to take the edge off. My head was spinning.

I’d nearly finished off my first beer when Keith stated, “It’s too bad you aren’t interested in her. Casey is a cool girl.”

I didn’t respond.

“I was surprised that you even invited her to sit with us,” Keith pressed.

“It was not like I had much choice after Kyle’s little stunt,” I said through gritted teeth and glared at my younger brother.

“Hey I just called her over, you’re the one who extended the invite,” Kyle grinned smugly.

That pissed me off. “Well if you hadn’t called her over than I never would have invited her to sit down.”

“Tomatoes…tomaatoes,” he replied in an accent.

“Shut the hell up Kyle!”

“What are you so defensive for? Sounds to me like you’re trying to convince yourself that you don’t like her when, by inviting her to sit with us, you clearly do.”

“Was that such a problem for you guys? Jesus!”

“No. It wasn’t a problem at all, Jake. Casey is really fun to hang out with,” Keith said trying to defuse the argument between Kyle and me. “I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant you don’t usually bring girls home to meet the fam. I mean how long did you date Krista? Three/four months? I met her once backstage at a concert and you didn’t even introduce us,” Keith revealed, laughing.

I frowned but didn’t refute his claim. He was right. I’d never been real captivated with any girl I’d dated or slept with. Introducing her to my family seemed a moot point since I knew she wouldn’t be around long enough for it to matter.

Keith shrugged. “Yeah well anyway, I liked her. You should try dating a nice normal girl like her sometime.”

“As opposed to what?” I asked.

“Your groupie sluts.”

I got up and grabbed another beer. I popped the cap, took a swig and sat back down before responding, “I like my groupie sluts.”

“Yeah well I hate to break this to you but those limber ladies aren’t marriage material, my man,” Keith laughed.

“Who says I want to get married?”

“I’m not saying now…I’m saying that someday you will want to grow up and have a big boy relationship. And all I’m saying is it should be with a girl like Casey.”

“If you like her so much why don’t you date her?”

“Can’t.”

“Why?”

“Because she likes you dummy,” Keith rolled his eyes.

“No she doesn’t,” I argued.

Keith looked at me like I was a crazy person then laughed, “You’re an idiot.”

I gave him a dirty look.

“Seriously?” He said.

“What?” I asked, feeling annoyed.

“Oh come on Jake. You guys have chemistry. You know it. She knows it. The fucking goldfish in the lobby pond know it.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at that. “I just…I don’t want to give her the wrong impression.”

“What impression is that?”

“That I’m interested.”

“You’re not?”

“I mean, she’s cool and all but,” I hesitated. “It’s just not a good time to get involved with someone, you know.”

“Who says?”

“I say.” I sneered at Keith. “I’m insanely busy, Keith. I just don’t have time for a relationship right now.”

“So tell me exactly when will be a good time, Jake, because for the past seven years you’ve been perpetually busy. If that is going to be the deciding factor then you might as well prepare now to be alone forever.”

I stared at Keith. I wanted to argue with him but we both knew he was right. I was always making excuses, using my schedule as a reason for not wanting to get close to a girl, but the truth was…God…the truth was so much more depressing. We sat in silence drinking our beer.

“So if you aren’t interested,” Kyle broke the quiet moment, “Can I have a go at her?”

I gave Kyle a death stare. He loved pushing my buttons.

“I’ll take that as a ‘no’,” Kyle smirked.

Chapter Five

Casey

I had trouble sleeping that night. All I could see when I closed my eyes was Jake’s face, Jake’s smile, Jake’s hair. I liked everything about him, including his awesome family. I was hopelessly smitten with a guy I would probably never see again after tomorrow.

When I woke up in the morning, the only thing on my mind was Jake McKallister…and I couldn’t stop smiling. I ran our conversations over and over in my mind, laughing to no one. God, I had it bad. I was seriously crushing on Jake. How had this happened? How had I become one of those horrible clichés…the love-struck groupie who fell for the rockstar? Stupid! This guy was gorgeous, talented, rich and famous. The girls in his world were models and singers…not waitresses. Yet, Jake gave off all the signs of being interested. Of course maybe he was only interested in a booty call; but if that were the case, then why didn’t he push for it. Obviously he had to know I was into him. It wouldn’t have taken much to sway me. No, I’d convinced myself that Jake was into me and no amount of self-doubt could break me of that belief.

Chapter Five

Jake

“Wake up, dipshit!” Kyle’s voice broke into my dreams.

I bolted upright, unsure of where I was or what was happening. Kyle was standing in the doorway grinning.

“Your alarm is going off,” he said.

“Oh God. What the?” I reached over and turned it off. “I’m so out of it. Fucking jetlag! What time is it?”

“Eight. You’re fine.”

I’d been having quite the dream when I was so rudely interrupted. I turned so Kyle wouldn’t catch sight of my morning wood. Kyle remained in the doorway.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“Are you waiting for a tip?” I asked grumpily.

“I wasn’t but I wouldn’t turn one down if you offered.”

“Well then here’s my tip…if you don’t leave now, you’ll see dick.”

Kyle made a gagging sound then walked out of the room.

I rubbed my tired eyes and thought about the dream I’d just been having. She was even invading them. A smile spread across my face as I thought about all the funny things Casey said yesterday. Damn she was smart and feisty and fun. Keith was right. I liked her. There was no denying it.

I yanked off the sheets and walked to the bathroom. I turned on the shower and took a piss while the water warmed up. I stepped into the steaming flow and let it roll over my tired body before dunking my head under the steady stream. Water saturated my hair and ran down all sides of me. I shampooed then soaped up. My hands slid over the rough, raised skin that crisscrossed my body, a reminder of the childhood horrors I’d survived. I had long ago come to terms with how those scars came to be but that didn’t mean I openly discussed my past. It was one of the main reasons why I pushed women away. I hated revealing my scars because that meant having to explain them. That was why my ‘groupie-sluts’, as Keith so eloquently put it, where so perfect. The encounters were quick and impersonal. No girl was ever around long enough for me to have the conversation. Hell most of the time, they weren’t around long enough to even see me without a shirt on.

My thoughts turned back to Casey and I wondered what she would think of my scars. She was different than the others but that didn’t mean she would be any less curious. At some point she would want details and I knew that I couldn’t give that to her. What had happened to me was something I would never share with anyone. It was just the way I dealt with the trauma. But unfortunately, people always wanted more from me. My pleas for privacy were never accepted. This had always been the major deal breaker when it came to women. One or two trysts in bed and they were, all the sudden, my personal therapists, prodding me to open up and share my feelings. Fuck that! That part of my life was off-limits to everyone…including any woman who tried to get close to me.

But then, I’d never really been too invested in those relationships to begin with. There was no real trust. The few “girlfriends” I’d had were really just about sex for me. There was no emotional connection. We didn’t have light, fun conversations. We didn’t laugh together. We just got together often for sex and then, by default, we hung out in public occasionally. I guess I could see why the girl might consider us ‘together’ but I never did. My past relationships never went deeper for me emotionally. In fact, I spent most of my last ‘relationship’ just trying to get out of it. But Casey excited me in ways that went beyond just sex. She made me feel, I don’t know, normal, and my attraction to her was undeniable. So then why did I feel so conflicted? Why couldn’t I just let go? Why couldn’t I just allow myself to be happy…just this once?

Later that day, after arriving at the church with my family, Mitch came up and said, “Hey Jake, if you want you can just hang out back here until the ceremony. Having you as an usher might be counterproductive to getting people to take their seats. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Yeah, that is probably best,” I replied, more than a little relieved. I’d actually been a bit worried about that very thing. I waited in the groom’s room by myself for a while playing on my phone until I got bored and started thinking about Casey. Once I did, I couldn’t get her out of my mind. I still had 45 minutes to kill so I decided to go looking for her.

I walked out of the church and was heading over to the rooms in the other building where I knew the bridal party was getting ready, when I saw a group of teenage girls lingering. They weren’t dressed for a wedding and they had cameras and cell phones at the ready. Crap. I froze in place and contemplated going back inside the church but by now I was already halfway there. I had not yet been spotted so I made the split second decision to keep walking. I’d only covered half the remaining distance before a girl screamed my name. I looked up, smiled, waved then, like a coward, ran the rest of the distance. I quickly ducked inside the building, feeling instant relief but also worrying that the entire hoard of excited teens would follow me inside. I turned around and locked the door. If anyone was coming behind me they were screwed but I figured that was preferable to an invasion of enthusiastic teenage girls.

I wandered from room to room looking inside for Casey. I passed an older woman and I asked if she knew Casey. She didn’t. Finally I rounded a corner and there she was. I stopped dead in my tracks and gazed at her in awe. Casey was wearing a shimmery, flowing bridesmaid dress. The color was so unusual, a greenish-yellow mix but it was perfect with her skin tone and hair color. The dress fell just above her knees and I was treated to a view of her perfectly toned legs. Holy shit! I gulped. I was awestruck by her beauty. My eyes scanned upwards. Casey’s hair was again pulled back into a ponytail but now it looked glamorous, slicked back tightly, with curls cascading down her back. A couple of small flowers were pinned into her hair. Even the makeup she was wearing, more than last night, was still subtle and radiant. The sunlight from the window illuminated her and I swear she reminded me of a meadow full of wild flowers. I just stood there and stared at her, mesmerized. Casey was smiling as she chatted easily with a young girl. She was arranging flowers in the child’s hair. She must have sensed my presence and looked up. When she saw me, a bright smile crossed her face. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever seen anyone as beautiful as her in all my life.