Can I Wear My Nose Ring to the Interview?: A Crash Course in Finding, Landing, and Keeping Your First Real Job (48 page)

I
ONCE TALKED TO AN EMPLOYEE ABOUT TAKING INITIATIVE
, thinking ahead, and anticipating needs. I cited my boss’s assistant, who did things like calling hotels to request extended checkout when she suspected he would be running late. The next day my assistant said, “I thought about everything you said about initiative, and I get it. I just have one question: How do I know when to take it?”

Though that wasn’t the brightest response, I do have a few things to say on the topic. Initiative is highly valued in the workplace, but too much initiative can get you into trouble. You’ve got to get the lay of the land and a sense of the personalities around you before you start redesigning the company. Communicate your ideas and see what kind of response you get: “I started drafting an agenda for tomorrow’s meeting based on what we discussed. Would that be helpful to you?” Don’t be offended if the boss says she doesn’t need it, but half the time I’m guessing she’ll be delighted. Definitely ask before you embark on any time-consuming projects of your own design.

There are small ways to take initiative, too: e-mailing your boss with information you’ve come across that relates to projects she’s working on, reminding her about a colleague’s birthday. Be a team player: Take initiative in ways that benefit your whole group, not just your boss. Be helpful even when your efforts won’t be recognized. Especially when you’re new, volunteer to pitch in and take on those jobs nobody wants. Clean up after the breakfast meeting, take minutes, figure out how to work the projector.

I
HEARD A STORY ABOUT A YOUNG WOMAN
who quit her first job on the spot when someone asked her to change a lightbulb. I was not impressed:
When I was thirty years old I was picking dead mice off the floor at a nonprofit.

While I hope you won’t have to deal with rodents, I urge you to always clean up after yourself. Don’t leave messes for the janitor or cleaning crew. If you break or spill something major, leave a note or tell someone—don’t just run for the hills.

If you break glass or need to throw out chemicals, take precautions. Find out where the remnants should go and take the necessary steps. A custodian at a former workplace of mine sliced his arm open when someone threw broken glass in a trash barrel without wrapping it or leaving a note—an innocent mistake, but a thoughtless one with consequences.

If you eat at your desk or use the office kitchen, clean up after yourself. Be blameless when using the office bathroom. Change the toilet paper if you use up the roll, and check to make sure you’ve left the place clean.

When you use something up or a machine you’re using breaks, don’t just walk away. Refill the printers and copy machines! If they jam, try to fix them, and get help if you can’t.

D
ON’T AIR YOUR DIRTY LAUNDRY AT WORK
.
It’s a small world. The colleague you confide in could end up being your boss one day. Does everyone need to know how you kicked your addiction or recovered from a serious eating disorder? Leave your personal problems, past and present, at home. I once had to fire an intern who not only came in late every day and mis-handled every task she was assigned but tried to excuse herself by telling me how hungover she was, how late she’d been out, and how she was on a new combo of antidepressants. Another confided that he was an alcoholic as an explanation for some erratic behavior. (We recommended counseling and had to let him go.)

If you ignore my advice because you feel you simply must have a confidante at work, don’t use your boss! No matter how friendly you become, you shouldn’t lose sight of the fact that your relationship is professional. There’s a difference between friendly conversation and personal revelations. Know that sometimes bosses try to get intimate with their employees as a way to make them feel more comfortable, or because
of what’s going on in their own lives—I’ve heard plenty of stories about assistants becoming de facto therapists for their bosses. This isn’t right. But take the high road. Keep your private life private. Disclose as much information as you feel you need to in order to satisfy your boss, but keep your emotional life and romantic crises to yourself.

I
F YOU WANT TO GET AHEAD AT WORK
, it’s not enough simply to report to your boss and do what you’re told. You need to make it your goal to learn as much about the company as possible. That includes getting to know people from different departments and understanding reporting hierarchies, both formal and informal.

Obviously, the most important hierachy to understand is the one that involves you. To whom do you report? While you may have been hired by the manager of your department, it’s possible that on the job you’ll report to his associate. But you’ll also want to determine who needs to be cc’ed on what e-mail and to whom you should bring particular issues. Is there a company directory listing titles and department heads? If not, you’ll have to figure it out by watching and listening. Keep in mind that titles aren’t everything: Two people with the same title may have very different jobs or levels of authority, depending on their seniority.

E
SPECIALLY WHEN IT COMES TO NEW SITUATIONS
, I’m a big believer in the expression “With two ears and one mouth, you should hear twice as much as you say.” In meetings, listen. It’s fine for you to have and express an opinion, but hang back a bit at first. Don’t be the person who just loves to hear himself talk—while other people roll their eyes. As my grandfather used to say, don’t be the person who states the obvious with a sense of discovery. If you do speak up, be humble:
“I may not understand the bigger picture yet, but it occurs to me that …”
Better to keep quiet and ask questions of or share ideas with a colleague after the meeting than make a fool of yourself in public.

A note on challenging the status quo: When you’re new, you may feel you’re able to bring a fresh eye to problems or situations to which others are blinded by force of habit. But do your research before proposing any changes. It could be that your big idea was thought of and nixed months ago. There may be background you’re unaware of. Yes, some default
routines and procedures should probably be challenged—but it could all be much more complicated than you imagine.

S
HOW DEFERENCE TO YOUR ELDERS
and to those who have been at the company for longer than you have. I once asked an assistant to check some information in the database for me. “You should really learn how to use it,” he said. I suggested a better answer would have been, “Sure, I’ll get the information. If you’re not familiar with the database, would you like me to give you a tutorial sometime?” His response added insult to injury: “I don’t have time for that—I’m really busy!”

Who isn’t busy? (Well, maybe not you, yet—but you’ll soon find out how much
stuff
there is to do in the work-world.) When someone asks for help, regardless of whether it’s your direct supervisor or not, you need to step up. Besides the importance of being a team player, as a junior person you are in fact “junior” to almost everyone in the company. Yes, it may be annoying to fetch a package or two for the flaky executive who can’t be bothered to ask her own assistant, but just do it. In my experience, good office karma never goes to waste. If the request really seems unreasonable, make an attempt to steer the asker to someone more appropriate. If you feel someone is routinely abusing your time, talk to your boss.

R
EMEMBER WHAT I SAID ABOUT NEGATIVITY DURING THE JOB HUNT
?
It doesn’t stop there. Negativity is toxic to the workplace—actually, it’s contagious. One negative person can bring down the morale of an entire team. Don’t be that person. Pessimism impedes your ability to get your work done: While a negative person will see situations as doomed from the start, focusing energy on diverting blame, a more productive mind-set seeks solutions.

Keep this mantra in mind: Don’t place blame, offer solutions. Rather than saying, “Well, the budget for this project was insufficient to begin with, so there really wasn’t much we could do,” be the problem-solver:
“When I realized our budget and mission weren’t in line, I reexamined the scope of the project and found we could cut costs in the following ways.”

What if there actually is a problem, and it’s with a colleague who’s not pulling her weight? Remember: Don’t place blame, offer solutions. First try speaking directly to the colleague. Don’t be accusatory. Offer guidance or a suggestion for a better division of labor, perhaps one you feel might be better suited to your colleague’s talents or proclivities:
“I’m thinking we should be more organized about things the next time we tackle such a project. What if I handle the invoices and you take on the outreach?”

If that doesn’t work, seek help from a supervisor or another colleague. It’s delicate, though. You want to convey the situation without looking like a tattletale or as if you’re shirking responsibility. Accept ultimate accountability. “I’m sorry the project was late. I assumed Jack had gotten the figures I needed from our Dallas office, but I never checked back. When I needed them and found out he didn’t have them, it was too late.”

I
F YOU’RE NOT IN A PARTICULARLY HIGH-PROFILE POSITION
, you’re going to need to do your own PR. If you have good news about a project you’ve worked on, share it in an e-mail to your supervisor or team. But make sure you don’t try to take all the credit for a collaborative effort—thank everyone who helped. I’ve seen plenty of young upstarts, but I’ve also seen people be too self-effacing for their own good. Don’t assume your boss will remember that you were the one who closed the big deal. Slipping in a subtle reminder never hurts.

S
HARE GOOD NEWS ABOUT OTHERS AS WELL
.
If you hear good professional or personal news from a colleague, say congratulations and ask if it’s okay to share it: “Samantha is too modest to tell you, but one of her articles has just been published. I have a copy if anyone would like to see it.”

If you hear praise about an employee from a supervisor, you might repeat the compliment:
“I don’t know if Andy has told you directly, but he couldn’t be more pleased with the report you did and he couldn’t stop talking to me about it.”
Often people don’t remember to offer positive feedback when things are done well; it’s easier to pick on what’s wrong.

What if a colleague shares negative information about another colleague? Don’t repeat it. Encourage that person to speak directly to the offending party. If he won’t, you might try vaguely hinting without giving away too much information: “In a meeting, I heard Bob express some
concern about the project your team is working on. You might want to check in with him about the timeline.” In short: Contribute to a positive office culture in any way you can.

I
NSTEAD SAY
, “I’
LL FIND OUT
.”
Writer Nora Ephron has a great piece about a husband who asks “Where’s the butter?” He knows perfectly well where the butter is; it’s in the little part of the refrigerator marked
Butter
. What he means is, “Bring me the butter!” When your boss asks what’s the cheapest way to mail a package to Australia, don’t say, “I don’t know” say,
“I don’t know, but I’ll find out right away. What would you like mailed and when does it need to be there? Should I insure it?”
Try to figure out what your boss is really asking. Is it a question or a request for action? Even if it’s a question, the correct answer usually involves “I’ll find out.”

Q. What do I do if I’m running late?

A.
Call in right away and leave a voice mail if you can’t reach your boss in person. If there was something important you needed to get to early in the morning, try to delegate. Call a colleague or intern and see if you can get someone to handle it for you. Make sure you trade home and cell numbers with your boss and close colleagues in case of emergency. At the end of the day, leave things in good enough order so that someone could find information on your desk or on your computer if necessary. (Think files, not piles.)

Q. I’m planning a vacation. How do I prepare things at work?

A.
Different companies have different rules about when and how vacation requests should be made. Check your company’s policy in advance. Might you be refused if others have requests in? Find out. Don’t buy nonrefundable tickets and then ask. Your tickets are not your employer’s problem.

Be sure to make things as easy as possible for your boss and any colleagues who may be covering for you. Leave status memos outlining any unfinished business or specific things that need to happen while you’re gone, along with contact info for people you deal with regularly. Set your e-mail auto reply and change your outgoing phone messages.

You will make mistakes. It’s a fact. Accept it. Everyone messes up, and everyone new messes up sooner or later.