Captured Secret (The Captured Series) (27 page)

After a hot shower, I grab my Kindle. Unfortunately, my mind is not obeying because I can’t settle myself enough to escape into my new book. All I see as I lay there is me on top of Ty, his face looking up at me as I slide him in and out of me. He looked at me as if I was a sent from heaven just for him. He looked at me as if I was the most perfect girl he had ever seen. I looked at him with thick emotion on my face as well. Emotion to show him that, in this short time, I’m totally falling for him. The other side of my brain bombards me with him stating that he doesn’t do or want more than casual. Why the two sides can’t just get along is beyond me. They should help me see what’s really in front of me, because
I feel like they are two sides working against one another.

I wake to Zoey’s loud mouth and then a hard knock on my door. She gives up after a couple seconds and I lay there listening to voices in the living room. I will not subject myself to any more humiliation today.
You should just go out there and party with all the boys and girls, including Ty and Caroline. They can analyze your tear stained face and all take a guess why you have been tearing up all night.
The voices quiet quickly and I fall into a slumber.

Monday was, well…Monday. Busy as hell and one would think that I could get that whore caressing Ty out of my mind. However, that doesn’t seem to be an option today. I was sad and having a pity party last night, but today has turned to anger. Ty wants casual. I get that. But I wouldn’t shove another in his face. The rational side of me knows he really truly didn’t shove, but I’m angry, and angry works way better than sad with me.

A bit after lunch, I shoot a text to Ty:

Me: Do you need me tonight?

Ty: I can get by if you have something else.

Me: Perfect. See you Wednesday. Let me know if I’m not needed then as well.

Ty: Come Wednesday. Please, I need you.

I laugh out loud in my whacko head. I’m not analyzing that reply. I need a break from my life. I text Mandy and ask her to an early drink. I got to work super early, so I am happy to get out super early. She agrees and meets me for book club. I drink more than normal and am happy to listen to all the books she has read. I miss the escape, and really need to get back to fiction where life is way easier than this big shit stain I have going on. We giggle and change the subject a million times as normal. I promise her that I will, in fact, make time for her next week. I received the benefit last night of giving my time to another. The benefit was a swift kick in the ass.
Dick.

We part and my phone dings with a text from Zoey. She just got out of work and she and Pierce are eating at The Cantina. A liquid diet has worked, but the thought of The Cantina makes me want Mexican like a pregnant woman craves food. I shoot a quick text saying, ‘I’ll be there.’ As I drive over, I rethink committing to coming right away. Today was not my better appearance days. I have the usual business casual look, but my hair is wrapped in a knot and the makeup is beyond minimal.
Whatever.

My bestie and Pierce are sitting with their backs to me when I enter the restaurant. I grab Zoey from behind and pull her against my chest in a big bear hug. She giggles and kisses my cheek. She is most definitely my salvation. She always makes me happy. I hug Pierce the same way. “We missed you last night Stel,” he whispers in my ear. I pull up a chair and already know that I want chicken tortilla soup and will gorge myself on the chips and salsa.

A large margarita is set down in front me and I can’t help but smile big as Pierce tips his big glass at me. “Thank you, Pierce. I missed you guys…”

“What’s up with you?” Zoey is so straightforward. I’m caught off guard as I take the tangy drink into my mouth. She’s looked over my face and eyes multiple times.

I pull my brow together and reply, “Nothing. A girl can’t wear light makeup?”

She says, “It’s insulting when you play me for a fool.” Her tone is light and I keep my face just as neutral.

“Nothing, I didn’t sleep well and I didn’t plan on going anywhere after work tonight. I called Mandy and we met for drinks and our weekly book club. Now, I’m with my favorite person who gives me shit. I must not have gotten the memo it was a look pretty day. It’s Monday, Zoey, and it was a long one.” I pick up my glass again and enjoy my margarita.

“Why aren’t you at Ty’s tonight? I just thought you both would come after you were all done with clients.” She has this ‘I know something’s weird’ look.

“I texted him today and he didn’t need me.” I look her in the eye. If I didn’t, she’d probably pull me out of this restaurant and demand to know where my head is. I feel someone brush the back of my chair. I smell the most perfect scent I’ve ever pulled into my nose as Ty sits in the chair next to me.

“What’s up? Did you guys order yet?” He looks at them and then glances at me.

“No, Stella was out with someone else and just got here like a couple minutes ago. But we are ready if you all are,” Zoey answers.

“I’m ready,” I say to Zoey. I shoot over to Ty, “Are we waiting on anyone to join you tonight? Is Jaxon bringing your lady friend for dinner again?”

He looks unaffected by my questioning and replies, “No, it’s just me tonight.”

“No offense, Ty, but you can do so much better than that Caroline. She’s so damn ditzy acting and catty. I guess if she’s good in bed, I get it. I mean, I won’t deny she is attractive, but other than her looks, there’s definitely not much to her.” My insides light up with pride that this outspoken woman is my best friend of all time. She makes me so proud. The waiter approaches the table and we all order. I couldn’t be more content knowing I have another margarita coming.

As Ty unwraps his silverware, he says, “To answer your question, Zoey, I could do a lot better than Caroline.” He shoots his eyes to hers and locks them there. “Trust me when I tell you, I know what a great girl looks like and feels like, and acts like. But that’s just it, I don’t want better. Better… fucks you over just when you think you have a good thing going. So Caroline, I can take her or leave her. Better… haunts you and breaks you down. And to that, I say, no thank you. I keep unattached for good reasons.”

“Wow, tell me how you really feel.” Zoey shoots an ‘oh my God what is wrong with him’ look at Pierce. “Well, it’s sad, Ty, because the perfect girl may be right under your nose. She may have walked by you or you may have spoken to her, or you may have had a one night stand because Pierce tells me that’s all you allow. I have someone amazing in my life.” She darts her eyes over to Pierce, and then over to me as I pick up my big glass for generous sips. “I think Stella could have it too if she would open her damn eyes. But you two are great for each other you know? Perfect friends, misery loves company.” Ty and I meet eyes. I look at him tonight and all I can picture is him behind Caroline being casual with her body the way he has been with mine. I wonder if he looks at her with those eyes that he gives me. My heart aches and my belly drops because looking at his face, having him this close, tells me that I have fallen. And it hurts to fall for someone who doesn’t want the same. The decision has to be made. Do I continue and try to get over the feelings of jealousy, or end the casual relationship and try to maintain a friendship. I would not be able to work with him until these feelings subside. I feel instant panic thinking about not seeing him day in and day out. I would feel empty. I love the feel of the friendship we share and I want it. I need it. I just don’t know how to sort out my feelings.

Ty gazes my way many times through dinner, and I try so hard not to look over, but he is like a magnet for me. I just want him, yet I’m so angry because all I can feel is my hand being dropped like I had the fucking plague.

Tuesday’s workday comes and goes. Ty left the table last night early when he got a phone call that took him away for over a half an hour. I walked out not far after him and never said goodbye, which made me feel like I left with some dignity. I sure as hell did not want to wait around and see if I get picked to be tonight’s entertainment. I received a text from both my boys today, Jason wanting to go to dinner and Ty asking me to come over or just call. I denied both requests. I need to sort my brain so I went for a run after work and lay around with Zoey. The pizza we ate totally cancelled out the run. My mind is going a million miles an hour and I find I can’t relax or focus. It took me several hours to fall asleep, and then, the early morning wake up came way too fast.

My Wednesday workday was difficult to get through. I’m exhausted and frustrated. I want to yell at Ty so badly about everything. About me feeling hurt, but I don’t have any ground to stand on, which makes me even angrier. I wanted to avoid him one more day, but he texted me to insure I would be there.

T
HE
STUDIO
DOOR
IS
UNLOCKED
, and I am expected, so I walk in. My stomach’s in knots because I am nervous to be alone with Ty tonight. I want to talk about the whole Caroline incident, but what is there really to talk about? A young woman with dark hair and chunky blonde highlights looks me over as if I’m what the cat drug in. Thank goodness, I gave the hair and makeup my all without it being over the top. In a snotty tone she asks, “Can I help you? The studio is closed at the moment but I can have Ty Caulder, the owner, give you a call when it re-opens.”

In all the time I’ve spent here, I have never seen this woman. My shitty mood today will not allow my filter to work. I match her look and ask, “No ,you can’t and who are you?”

“I’m here with Ty, or that’s the plan for tonight. Who exactly are you?” Thank God, Ty enters or I might rip this bitch’s hair out. My period is due, and this PMS is so altering my heightened irritation.

His eyes are downcast as he says, “Lindsay, this is the big catalog, but of course, I do all my shopping online. They are reasonably priced, reliable and have a very fast turnaround time. I haven’t had any issues ever.” He has some catalogs in hand. Looking up, his eyes finally meet mine.

“Do you need me here tonight? If not, I’ll go,” I snap at him. I know my face is not welcoming in the least, but I don’t want to hold up this bitch’s plan of being with Ty tonight. Let’s add another bitch to the mix.

Ty hesitates at my tone. “Lindsay, this is Stella. She’s my assistant.” Oh, that word just eats at my nerves. “Stella, this is Lindsay, we went to school together. Well, she was way behind me, but came by to see who we order through for studio products.”

I make my way around the desk, sit, and start putting my stuff down as this catty girl speaks to Ty as though I am not in the same room. After Sunday, and the way I feel at this moment, I just don’t know that it would hurt if he asked me to leave. “You should let her go, Ty, and we can catch up. You said you don’t have clients tonight.” That soft, seductive voice tells me that she didn’t just stop by for a catalog.

I stand back up and look at him with a questioning look asking, well, which one… me or her? He bunches his brow at me, leads her to the door and out into the hall. She totally just rubbed me the wrong way. While they are in the hall, I decide to do my job and open his email and Facebook. Several minutes later, Ty returns. “What the hell? I’ve never seen you act like that? I know you’re pissed, but you’ve never acted like that around anyone who’s come in my studio.” He comes and stands in front of me with the desk separating us.

I fly into him. I can’t stay quiet any longer. “Why do I always have to be your assistant? Is that all I am? Why can’t I be your friend… ever? I totally understand when we have clients and you introduce me as your assistant, but you ALWAYS introduce me that way. I would never introduce you as my boss. You are my friend, Ty, who just so happens to be my boss.” I know I sound irrational but I just can’t help it.

“You are my assistant, Stella,” he says flatly.

“Not to bitches like that! Can’t you give me a little respect? Can’t I be your friend during introductions? Or is that just too much to ask of you, boss?” I raise my voice a bit. He just isn’t getting this.