Caribbean Christmas (11 page)

She looked up at him, her stomach clenching as a wave of nausea struck. “I don’t know.”

“That’s okay. We’ll tell him when you come back.”

She nodded and closed her eyes. “Thank you.”

“You shower first. I’ll take my turn while you are getting dressed. We want him surprised, not mortified.”

“Right.” She nodded and looked up at him, wishing they’d had more time.

“Saskia, he’s going to love your Christmas surprise,
speculaas poppen
or not.”

His phone rang before she could tell him it wasn’t the surprise that had her so anxious. Using the same shower where he’d made love to her so thoroughly just hours before didn’t help matters either. She had this monumental decision to make and she wasn’t ready. Leaving now would be like ripping her soul open, but staying would be turning her back on everything she’d spent years building.

Turning her face into the warm spray of water, she let the tears flow, just for a moment. Just to release enough so she could put on a happy face and make the Christmas memory with her father she’d been craving since she left Anguilla the first time.

Leaving her father then had felt like the end of the world. And so did this.

“Ready? He’s inside.” Joe helped Saskia down from the truck and guided her to the porch of the shop. Dutch’s voice rang out as he told an animated story about his latest adventure. “Don’t be nervous, it’s just your dad.”

She nodded and he walked ahead of her through the open door. “Dutch, my man, welcome home.” He greeted the older man with a back-slapping hug, held on a beat longer than usual. Though Dutch didn’t know it, their relationship was forever changed.

“Boy, you should have been there. This octopus was—”

Joe clapped him on the shoulder and winked at Buddy and Ronald. “In a minute, Dutch. Something came for you while you were gone.”

“It can wait. This octopus—”

“She’s been waiting for you.”

Saskia stepped through the door, her deep red hair caught up in a braid over one shoulder. The warm pink of her silk camisole brought out the beauty of her freckled skin. “Merry Christmas, Daddy.”

Dutch turned and stared through her for a moment, as if he worried he’d seen a mirage. Then he pulled in a breath and raced towards her. “
Mijn kindje.
”

He lifted Sass in his beefy arms and spun her around as she laughed. He spoke in Dutch, she answered in English, and they both wiped tears from their eyes.

Joe walked out the back, leaving them to have their moment. Saskia had come to reconnect with her father, not with him. He respected them both too much to interfere. They’d both tell him to stay, and he would, and none of it would keep her from heading back to Florida in two days.

Chapter Fifteen

Saskia linked her arm into her father’s as the crowd of children counted down. She chanted the numbers as loudly as she had when she’d been holding the hands of her schoolmates. The lights switched on, illuminating the buildings and trees in the Christmas village. The children sang out and danced, knowing that Christmas Eve was their last chance to enjoy the display until next year.

“It’s so much more elaborate now.” She leaned close so Dutch could hear her over the fray.

“The Christmas village gets bigger every year. Tourists want to see displays like they do at home, and you know how we Anguillans are. We want everyone to be happy here.” He shrugged and walked them towards the line of market tents.

“Do you consider yourself Anguillan? I always think of you as Dutch.”

“It’s my name, and I am proud that I came from Holland, but Anguilla is my home. And yours. You’re a native.” He reached over and tweaked her nose like he’d done when she was a child.

She grinned, starting to laugh as he stopped at a booth offering up the most pathetic-looking pine twigs planted in buckets of sand. “In the States, these are what we call Charlie Brown trees.”

“If I’d have known you were coming, I would have ordered a tree for you.”

“That would have ruined my surprise. The look on your face was priceless. Well worth doing without a tree for the holiday.”

“Are you sure? I don’t have any decorations for the house at all.”

She nodded and started them down the row, her gaze catching on a table of used books. With import taxes so high, nearly every paperback came in second hand. The country needed the tourism dollars from the Estate so they could ease off taxes on their citizens. She bought books new, and on impulse. Sometimes a dozen at a time. A habit she’d never fully appreciated until now.

“Dad, I want to invest in the Estate. We haven’t seen much money from the initial contract yet, but it’s coming.”

He dismissed the notion with a wave of his hand. “You build your business first, then worry about investments. If you overextend yourself, there is nothing to give from later.”

“This isn’t make-your-rent kind of money. It’s buy-a-house money. I need to invest in something.”

“So buy a house. The Estate hasn’t sold all the condos available. If you want to contribute, do it that way until you’re more stable.” He stopped at a stall offering woven baskets, but didn’t seem to see them.

“I can afford to do more. Really.” He didn’t seem to hear her as he moved to the next booth teeming with handcrafted sea-glass jewelry.

“
Meisje
, please. Trust an old man on this. Never invest more than you can afford to lose.”

“I suppose you’re right.” A steel drum rendition of “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer” floated through the air. Her mind slipped back to her first holiday in Florida and how sad she’d been that the Christmas music had sounded so produced. She’d felt like such a freak those first years, begging her mother to let them return home.

It had gotten easier as she’d made friends, but there had always been a part of her that longed to be here, embraced by warm sea air, laughter and the savory smoke of barbeque flirting with the sweet perfume of flowers.

“Fathers aren’t always right,
meisje
. I’ve invested everything into the Estate. I have more of a stake in its success than anyone.”

“I guess you think our family has put enough into it. I see that.”

Her father cleared his throat as if he meant to say more, but her attentions slipped away as Johannes and Harm sauntered into view. She really ought to take a picture of them, because Holly wasn’t going to buy how great they looked. Too bad Harm’s personality made his masculine beauty a complete waste.

Johannes looked so tempting in just red board shorts and sandals, she wished they were alone. His pale blue gaze locked on to hers, drawing her in with such confidence, such transparent desire her knees threatened to give in. Heat flushed her skin, her pulse raced and her stomach tightened, trying to hold back the yearning for him. Apparently, two days was long enough for her body to crave him.

“Boys!” Her father waved and started walking towards them.

Sass had a moment of sheer panic. She’d never had to deal with her father and a lover before. And now, there was so much at stake for them both, she didn’t want to drop any bombshells and have relationships scattering like sand in the wind. With the attraction between them so palpable, how would she be able to hide it from her father?

“
Vrolijk kertsfeest,
” Dutch called out as they neared, giving both men back-slapping hugs before taking her hand. “Thank you boys so much for looking after my girl.”

Harm coughed into his hand and looked away with a grin. Smart ass.

Dutch clapped Johannes on the shoulder. “You should come back to the house. You both should.”

“This is your time with Saskia. I don’t want to get in the middle of that. Besides, Harm has put me to work at his latest villa. With everyone working so much for the high season, he’s gotten behind schedule.”

Harm narrowed his dark eyes at his brother. “My schedule is just fine. You’re the one who stayed up tiling the kitchen instead of sleeping like a sane person.”

“You boys are family,” Dutch said. “You can’t get in the way.”

Harm’s obnoxious cough returned. If she weren’t wearing sandals she might kick him.

“Dutch, enjoy this visit.” Joe turned his cool gaze on her. “If Saskia decides to come back, maybe then we’ll all spend time together.”

Harm barked a laugh. “Yeah, just like old times.”

Saskia put her hands on her hips and glared at him. “Yeah, except a few things have changed since you used to think it was your place to order me around.”

“Just a few,” he replied without a glint of humor. Such a jerk.

Dutch chuckled. “You two always did like to snap at one another. Did you make Joe spend the entire time keeping the two of you apart?”

“Something like that.” Harm shook his head, his dark hair falling over his eyes. “Hannes, I see those dance teachers from earlier. I’m going to go talk them into having dinner with us.” He cast her a dirty look and strode off towards the market stalls.

She wanted to feel better that he’d finally left, but there was a gnawing dread in her stomach that Johannes would be having dinner with another woman. It felt as if she had a right to be angry, but she knew she didn’t. Still, she thought he was a better man than that. Wasn’t he? Had she imagined how special things felt with him, or did he make everyone he liked seeing in a bikini feel that way?

“You boys have your fun, but I expect you tomorrow for Christmas dinner. No excuses.”

Johannes smiled and nodded, his gaze trained on her father. She needed him to look her way, to give her some kind of clue as to what was going on.

She cleared her throat. “You could have dinner with us. I’m sure you’ve had enough of dealing with your bother of a brother and could use a break.”

He turned, his pale blue eyes twinkling in the waning light. He held her with his gaze, understanding and attraction relaxing her fears and tightening her desire.

“You’ve been away so long your dad shouldn’t have to share you. Besides, we already had a chance to catch up. When you come back, we’ll do it again.” He winked at her then turned back to Dutch. “We’ll see you for dinner tomorrow.”

She watched him walk across the patchy lawn, making his way to his brute of a sibling and a trio of top-heavy blondes. She’d need the trust of a trapeze artist to make it through the next few months until she could return to the island.

“Merry Christmas!” Dutch announced, pulling open the door for Harm and Johannes.

Her heartbeat stuttered as she caught his pale blue gaze. He hadn’t been home, telling Dutch he wanted to give them space. And she’d let him stay away.

She’d wanted to concentrate on her father, get his advice on how to maintain her integrity and run a business. Plus, she didn’t want to do anything to jeopardize the bond between her father and Johannes. He spoke with such adoration and respect it was obvious her father loved him as a son. While it hurt like hell to know he’d directed that energy elsewhere, he couldn’t have chosen a better man.

But now, as Johannes entered the house, she wasn’t sure how to react. She wanted to throw her arms around him and not let go, but she’d have to. Her ferry left this afternoon, and she’d be sleeping in her own bed tonight.

Johannes and Dutch would stay here, together. And maintaining their relationship was more important than her selfish desires.

She held on to the back of the white sofa and smiled at him, so caught up in it she startled when Harm approached and wrapped his arms around her, lifting her off her feet and whispering through clenched teeth. “I have to hug you, brat. If I don’t, he can’t. But so help me, if you hurt either one of them, I’ll find a way to make you sorry.”

The nervous laugh escaped her as he set her down and she looked up at his dark eyes. He’d always reminded her of a pirate with his haunted features and menacing demeanor. But his loyalty to the men she loved redeemed him a little.

Loved. Oh God, she loved him. She did. And as Johannes stepped in with a smile and a one-armed hug appropriate for a friend, she nearly broke in two. It took all her strength not to pull him close to her and tell him.

He wanted her to come back, but did he want more than that? She didn’t know, and she didn’t want to risk his relationship with her father until she did.

“I hope you’re hungry, boys. My girl has made us a feast.” He led them all to the dining room and took his seat at the head of the table.

“You did some redecorating in here.” Harm crossed his arms over his broad chest, his dark hair falling over one eye. “Why is there a wheel on the wall?”

She knew he couldn’t be nice for long. “I wanted to make the house seem more personal, so I brought up some stuff from the shop. A ship’s wheel is beautiful, and fitting for the home of a sailor, don’t you think? Better than the generic print Dad said a designer put up there.”

Harm shook his head and was about to say something when Johannes spoke.

“It’s Lola’s original wheel. I like it there.”

Saskia put a hand to her chest, realizing her mistake. “Oh, is that okay? It was just lying around at the shop. I didn’t think it would belong to anyone else.”