Cart Before The Horse (17 page)

The doctor turned up the speakers on the machine, and they heard the whirring sound of the heartbeat.

He heard Holly sniff, and when he looked down she was wiping her eye.

He lifted her fingers to his lips and kissed them. “Are
you okay?”

“Sorry.
I’m a little emotional. I didn’t think I would be.”

He bent over and kissed her forehead then rested his face next to hers, cheek to cheek.
They watched as the image

changed and Dr. Emily pushed buttons and made extra lines on the screen.

“Everything looks great.”
Dr. Emily removed the wand from Holly’s stomach and wiped off her skin with a washcloth. “I’ll let you get dressed and I’ll be back in.”

As soon as the doctor shut the door behind her, Gabe helped Holly from the table.

“That was amazing.” He blew out a breath, still in awe of what he’d seen.

“I didn’t think you were going to make it.” Her voice di
pped. His apology hadn’t fixed the hurt he’d caused. She wasn’t looking at him now at all. He’d hurt her by being late, though he’d certainly not meant to. As soon as she adjusted her clothes, he touched her arm. “I wouldn’t have missed this. I’m very sorry I was late.”

She shook her head and waved her hand between them.
Her eyes were wet with tears, and it was tearing him to pieces. She buttoned her shirt and turned to him. “Really, I’m just emotional.

“I don’t want you to think I will always let you down.”
He’d never much cared what people thought about him, but

now it mattered.
He hadn’t been disrespectful to people as a rule, but he’d always had a way about him that said he’d get to things when he’d get to them. It never had been a problem before, but he could see it was now.

“I’m just glad you came.
So much has changed in the past few weeks, and every day that this baby grows, and I grow, I think about how it’s going to keep changing for the rest of our lives.” She rested her hands on her stomach, and he noticed how much her body had changed in only a week. Beneath her hands was a small mound. She was starting to look the part of an expectant mother, and pride and love swelled in his chest.

He moved to her, interlaced his fingers with hers, and rested them on her stomach. “I wanted to discuss this over lunch, but I think I should tell you now.”
Gabe shifted his eyes

to hers and smiled when he saw compassion and love in hers. “Remember how worried you were the other night about there not being room for me and the baby at your place?” Holly nodded, and he gripped her hands tighter. “I’ve taken care of that. I bought us a house.”

Chapter Ten

Gabe threw his coat onto the back of the chair at his kitchen table and yanked open the refrigerator door. Damn it! It had been just long enough since he’d stayed there, he didn’t even have beer in his own fridge.

He slammed the door and leaned against the counter.
A headache pulsed between his temples, and he tried to rub it away before he headed to the bathroom to hunt up some
Tylenol.

The day certainly hadn’t gotten any better.
In fact, after the ultrasound it had gone straight to hell. Of all those women he had in his life, he’d never seen one turn as red in anger as he’d seen Holly turn when he mentioned the house.

Gabe walked back into his living room and plopped down into his leather recliner.
“What the hell was that all about?” he said aloud, turning from habit to where the picture of Jasmine always sat. It wasn’t on the end table. He looked around the room. Perched on the mantel, in the center of his family photos, was the picture of him and Jasmine that he’d kept next to him, by that same chair, for the past six years. “What are you doing up there?”

He got up, took down the frame, and went back to his chair.
How long had it been up on the mantel? With a little more thought, he knew he’d had it with him the night he’d drunk himself into oblivion and somehow Holly had poured him into bed.

“Did she move you?”
He ran his fingers over the image. “She thought you belonged with everyone else, huh?”

That would be Holly.

Then it occurred to him he hadn’t needed to be consoled by the picture or the image of Jasmine since that night.
He’d had Holly. There hadn’t been any long nights of staring at it and wondering how it all could have been lost. He’d been wrapped in Holly’s arms all those nights.

He sucked in a deep breath and let it out.
“I guess it took six years to move on.” He studied the image and almost couldn’t recognize himself anymore. “Did I make you as mad as I make her?” A laugh surfaced and he sat back in the chair. “She hates me for buying a house. Chandra told me not to do it, but I didn’t listen.” Gabe considered that for a moment. “I didn’t listen a lot, huh?”

Gabe closed his eyes and laid the picture on his chest.

Jasmine stood across the room, her arms crossed over her chest, shaking her head. “You always did think things should be done your way.”

“You always said so.”
He gazed at his wife. “It worked, didn’t it?”

She let out the laugh he’d fallen in love with when he too was so much younger.
“Part of being a good wife is letting her husband think he’s the one who came up with all the
good ideas.”

Gabe chuckled.
“Is that what you did?”

Jasmine nodded, tossing her blonde curls behind her shou
lder as she would. “She’s right to be mad, Gabe. She’s an independent woman who is now faced with a baby and a sudden fiancé. You have to give her space or she’ll run.”

Run.
Wasn’t that what she’d done to begin with? “Would
you
have been mad?”

“That’s a decision every woman wants to be part of.
You can’t be in charge of everything all the time.”

Gabe’s chest tightened.
“I didn’t know I was such a hard man to get along with.”

“You weren’t.
You just like to be boss. That’s why you do

so well here.”

She was just as he remembered her.
He’d aged in the six years since she’d been taken from him. His hair had thinned. Lines had crept around his eyes. His patience had become much shorter than it had been back when she was there to calm him. He’d missed her so much it had nearly killed him. “I came here because I had to get away from you.”

“You’ve done that, Gabe.
It’s okay to move on. I’ve been gone for a long time.”

He watched her standing there, across a dark room, or across the darkness of reality and dreams.
“I’ve missed you.”

“You have Holly now.
Take care of her and your daughter. Love them and always be there for them.”

“Daughter?”

Jasmine shrugged. “What would Gabe Maguire do if he wasn’t surrounded by women in his own home?” She touched her fingers to her lips and blew the kiss in his direction. He caught the kiss, as he would when they’d once parted in person, wanting to hold tight to it. The space around them filled with a golden hue. Jasmine waved, her blonde hair illuminated by the glow that surrounded them. Gabe reached for her, but she disappeared and the room grew dark.

Gabe opened his eyes and realized he’d fallen asleep.
The apartment was dark, and he could hear the faint sounds from downstairs meaning the dinner rush was in full swing. He rolled his wrist and looked at his watch. It was already seven o’clock. He should have been on the floor at five.

He pulled his cell phone from his pocket.
Not one call from Holly, but there were four from Chandra. Gabe rubbed his hand over his face and sat up. The picture on his chest fell to
his lap.

Jasmine smiled up at him.

“Thank you.”
He kissed his fingers and touched the glass, then set it on the table next to him facedown.

It was a usual Friday night.
The line was out the door.

Every table was full. And the glare that Chandra cast over Gabe should have had him crawling toward her begging
for mercy.

The sharp look he received from the chef wasn’t much di
fferent. So Gabe stayed clear of the kitchen and worked the tables, greeted customers, and even bussed.

It was after nine before the rush settled to a hum and he f
inally braved his way to the bar. Chandra shot him another one of her searing looks, but without being asked, she served him a cup of coffee.

“You’re an ass for not warning us you weren’t going to be down here.
We can handle it, but it’s nice to know.” She shook her head as she washed the glasses in the sink.

“I’m sorry.
I fell asleep.”

She looked him over and nodded her head.
“You are thickheaded, aren’t you?”

Gabe cocked his head and couldn’t help the smile that formed on his lips. He
sipped his coffee and set it down on the bar. “Excuse me?”

“I can see it in your face.
You bought the damn house. You idiot, I told you not to do that.”

He rubbed his chin then wrapped his hands around the co
ffee mug. “How do you know that?”

“You’re a man.
And I told you not to do something.” She set the glasses on the drying mat then picked up her rag and wiped down the bar. “Why do I even give my advice? It’s like when I have to convince you that all the good ideas for the restaurant weren’t mine, but yours.”

Gabe sat up straighter.
“Jasmine said that to me.”

“Still talking to your late wife?”
She shook her head again. “Some night you’re going to be having one of your conversations with her, but you’ll be sleeping in Holly’s bed.”

He looked down into his mug and let out a shallow breath.
The finality of his dream hit him and squeezed at his heart. “I don’t think so. I think I’ve had my last chat with Jasmine.”

Chandra reached for his hand and gave it a squeeze.“It’s time to let her go.” Her voice was soft and soothing.

“I think I have.”
He smiled and sat back in his chair, looking over the crowd. Couples lingered in booths having private discussions. A group of businessmen shared laughs over a pitcher of beer. And a regular at the bar watched a ball game on the television that hung over Gabe’s head. Things were comfortable now. He hadn’t even noticed how comfortable he’d become here over the years. “You think you can handle it
from here?”

“Oh, hell, who needs you anyway?
Go. You might as well try to save face with your
fiancée.
Because I already hate you.”

Gabe stood and picked up his mug.
He walked around the bar and washed it in the sink then gave Chandra a peck on the cheek. What if he’d already screwed it all up with Holly by trying to make it better? He wasn’t sure he could handle losing her now.

Holly had polished her toenails cotton-candy pink, which she hadn’t done since high school. She reorganized her closet by the size of her clothes, and then by color. There was the thought she’d rearrange the furniture in the living room, but she opted to knot her hair on the top of her head and put on a mint facial mask instead.

She was trying to occupy her time and keep calm because she was pissed.

Where did he get off telling her he’d bought a house for them? And didn’t he notice how mad she was before he delved in and gave her the details about the four-bedroom, three-and-a-half-bath, newly-remodeled-and-updated-kitchen, only-fifteen-minutes-from-town house he’d bought? Had he forgotten she had her own place and he had his? And damn it, she’d

even arranged her closet to make room for him and had a plan to fit the crib in the bedroom if she sold off the dresser.

The mask on her face was taut, and she knew that if she

frowned it would crack and flake all over the freshly vacuumed carpet. So she held very still as she sat on her couch, the news anchor muted on the TV, while she flipped through a magazine with fashions she’d never fit into again.

Even worse, she knew she’d put the idea into his head in the first place.
It had been that first night he’d come to stay with her. She’d thrown that stupid tantrum over not having enough space for a man or a child.

Well, she wasn’t moving.
That was that. He could live in his new house alone for all she cared. When she was ready, then maybe she’d join him. And just maybe she’d do that before they were married. Maybe.

Holly lay back on the couch and closed her eyes.
She let
the magazine fall to the floor and rested her hands on her
swollen tummy.

“He’s absolutely head over heels in love with you.”

Holly looked around, but she was in the dark. Only a small dot of light from far away lit wherever she was.

“I’m sorry.
What did you say?” Her voice echoed in the darkness as the light grew closer.

“Gabriel loves you.
He’ll take very good care of you.”

“Who are you?”
She still couldn’t see anyone, just a light that was now growing smaller again.

“He loves you.
Let him love you both. This is only the
beginning.”

The light went away, and Holly was alone in the dark.
She bolted up on the couch and gasped for air as she woke. Gabe sat next to her on the coffee table, holding her hand.

“Easy,” he said softly, touching her arm.
“I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“You?
You didn’t. I mean…” She sat up and put her hand to her face, only to find out she still had on her mask. “Oh, God.”

Holly stood from the couch and ran to the bathroom, sla
mming the door.

“Holly, are you okay?”

“I don’t want you to see me like that.”

“I think it’s cute.” His voice was muffled beyond the door.

She turned on the water and scrubbed off the mask.
Her face was pink beneath it. When she opened the door, he was right there.

The air in her lungs burned inside her chest, fueled by the anger that stirred inside of her. “What are you doing here?
I’m mad at you.” She walked past him and into the kitchen.

“Holly, you’re going to be more mad at me in your life than you are right now.”

“Oh, I can’t imagine. What else do you plan to do to make me even angrier?” At some point she figured he’d try to have a say in how she looked, or dressed, or maybe even held the
baby.

“Well I don’t have anything planned out…”

She turned sharply and narrowed her stare at him. “What you did was wrong.”

He nodded slowly. “I know.”

“You completely went around me and did what you wanted to do. That’s not what relationships are about.”

His shoulders dropped and his Adam’s apple bobbed. “I know.”

“Everything can’t always be your way.”

“I know.” He smiled.

“Stop it.” His sexy smile was melting her anger. Holly set her jaw. She wasn’t ready to give in yet. “Why are you smiling at me?”

“Well, first, you’re absolutely gorgeous when you’re mad.”
He moved closer and raised his finger to her nose. “And second, there’s this tiny speck of green right here.” He wiped the small glob from the end of her nose, and she felt the heat rise in her already raw skin.