Cart Before The Horse (26 page)

They exited the highway and drove along the ocean for a few miles before Gabe turned down a road lined with trees.
Holly thought in the spring it must be a sight, but winter had kissed everything, and the trees were bare.

Gabe pulled to the side of the road and sat for just a m
oment. When he lifted his head and looked at her, his eyes had gone dark and sad. “I have to do this, and I need you to go
with me.”

Holly looked around, unsure where they were.
But just beyond the trees she could see a cemetery with headstones perched in perfect little rows. She turned back to Gabe. Her skin grew cold and her hands began to shake.

“Okay.
I’ll wait.” It tore her up that he had to see Jasmine, but she wasn’t going to lose her control over it. He was still her husband, and no one could take that from her, not even his
late wife.

“No.
I need you to come with me. I know that this sounds stupid, but I need you to be there with me, and her. I want her to be with you and the baby and know that I’m okay.” Holly knew her expression must be dumbfounded, but she couldn’t help it. When he shook his head, it hurt her to think this pained him. “I know, this is crazy. But for the longest time I had to keep her alive in my head to get through it. I’d sit and talk to that damn picture or I’d see her in my dreams.” He gave a little laugh. “She’s the one who told me the baby was a girl, because what would I be if I didn’t live in a house full of women.”

Holly could feel the tears start to burn as her husband went through a transformation she’d thought he’d already endured.
She’d been wrong.

“Holly, please go with me. We need to say goodbye,
forever.”

She nodded, and he drove down the road and through the gates to the cemetery.
When he pulled over, Holly knew

which grave was Jasmine’s by the angel seated atop the headstone; she could swear it winked at her.

Gabe climbed out of the Jeep and walked around to open her door. He took the box from her lap and tucked it under his arm.
Then he gave her his hand to help her out and gain her balance on the frozen ground.

An awkward silence loomed between them as they walked to the grave.
She’d been right. The angel on the headstone was Jasmine’s, and the moment she stood next to it she’d felt an odd peace wave through her. She reached for Gabe’s hand only to find he was reaching for hers. They clasped fingers and held each other tightly.

“I’ve never been here with anyone else after the funeral,” he said, staring at the headstone.
“It seems like a lifetime ago now that I have you here with me.”

“Are you sure you don’t want a moment alone?”

“No.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before opening them again. “I can feel her. I haven’t felt her in a while. Not since you came into my life. She’s at peace.” The corners of his mouth turned up into a smile.

Holly bit down on her lip.
“I had a dream one night. I was alone in a room, but there was a light.” Gabe lifted his head and looked at her. She gripped his hand tighter. “Someone was there. A woman, but I never saw her face. She told me you loved me and would take care of us.”

“She approves of you.”

This time Holly smiled, realizing that the dream she’d had was about Jasmine. “Do you really think people are out there after they die? I mean, that she’d come into my dreams.”

“Might sound silly, but yes.”
He let out a breath that became a puff of white in the cold air. “Well, Jaz, this is it. I guess you saw me through everything.” He let go of Holly’s hand, took the box he carried in his other arm, and laid it on the ground in front of her headstone. “I brought Holly to introduce her to you, but I guess you’ve already met.” He let out a little

chuckle. “I’m happy.”

Holly couldn’t hold back the tears any longer.
They fell freely from her eyes, leaving a chilled path on her cheeks. Gabe turned to her and wiped them away. “Why are you crying?”

“I make you happy?”

“Oh, honey, I’ve never been happier.”

Holly let out a weak laugh.
“You shouldn’t be saying that right here, right now, should you?”

Gabe grinned and looked down at Jasmine’s grave.
“It’s exactly what she wanted to hear.” He kissed Holly’s cheek. “Go back to the truck. I’ll be right behind you.”

She nodded and walked back to the road slowly. Her feet were unsteady because her knees were shaking and the ground was frozen.
When she turned, she saw him touch his fingers to his lips, kiss them, then touch the angel on the headstone, and give a slow wave as he said goodbye to his late wife forever.

Holly climbed into the Jeep and watched as he walked slowly away from the grave.
His eyes had brightened to go with the smile on his mouth. Whatever had transpired had been just what he needed. A new Gabe walked toward her.

He climbed into the Jeep and started it.
The heater whirred, but Holly realized she was already warm.

“I love you,” she said.

Gabe turned to her with his eyes sparkling. “I love you. I love you both so much.” He reached out and touched her stomach.

Holly looked past him. “What did you leave on her grave?”

“The last things I owned of Jasmine’s. Now they’re with her.” He looked back out at the box. “I don’t need them
anymore.”

He put the truck into gear and they drove away.

As they headed toward the airport, Holly rubbed her stomach as the baby gave her a jab. “A girl, huh?”

Gabe looked over at her and nodded.

“I had given up on thinking someday I’d get to name a

child.” She looked up at him. “What do we name her?”

“I’ve always liked Madison.”

Holly considered. “I like it.”

“Then Madison it is.
My mother will be happy to finally get to use the name.” Holly lifted her brows in confusion, and Gabe laughed. “Well, of course she assumed I was a girl. So Madison would have been my name.”

Holly laughed.
Yes, Jasmine was right. What would Gabriel Maguire’s life be if it wasn’t filled with women—especially a daughter?

Chapter Seventeen

Holly looked around her enormous stomach at her swollen ankles, which she’d elevated in Gabe’s ugly recliner. It had become one of her favorite pieces of furniture and one of the only places she could get comfortable in
anymore.

Her wedding ring dangled from a chain around her neck now that her fingers were too big to wear it comfortably, and she felt like she had a cold that would never go away.
She let out a sigh. How did he still think she looked so beautiful?

Gabe passed by the window pushing his new lawn mower.

Holly laughed at the sight of him. The moment the grass had turned green in March, he’d hurried out and bought a new mower and a new edger. It was only April, and he’d mowed the grass twice already that week. It hadn’t grown even a quarter of an inch, but he was happy to be out there looking like
a fool.

Holly closed her eyes and rested her hands on her enormous stomach.
Chandra had ensured her that in the next six weeks she was going to double in size. How that was possible she wasn’t even sure. She wasn’t sure how her body had expanded to the size it had.

The baby gave her a sharp jab, and Holly watched as her stomach rose with the baby’s movements.
“Oh, honey, settle down, would you?” She rested her hand on the point that made her stomach look uneven. “Mommy is so tired.”

The quiet from outside signaled that Gabe had finished his mowing and would be traipsing inside any moment all sweaty

and smelly.
Holly braced for it. She heard the door slam between the house and the garage, and the odor of grass filled her oversensitive nose.

“It’s time to plant flowers,” he announced as he pulled a glass from the cupboard and filled it with water.
“Let’s go to the garden center.”

“I don’t know who you are anymore.”

“I’m a man with a house, a lawn, and empty garden boxes. Leslie Parks down the street just planted, and it looks great. It’s time.”

Holly rubbed her stomach and groaned again.
“I’m not planting anything but my butt in this chair for the next six weeks.”

“I didn’t say you had to help.” He was closer now; she could smell him before he was standing next to her kissing the top of her head.
“But let’s take a drive.”

“You will be showering first, right?”

“Of course.” He turned and she heard him stomping up the stairs. “But I do think there is some alluring quality to the smell of grass,” he shouted from the bedroom, and she laughed.

Maybe it was the fumes or maybe it was the pollen in the air, but as miserable as she felt, all swollen and tired in the chair, she was still deliriously happy.

Spring must have gotten to Holly too.
Gabe loaded down the back of his car with more flowers than he’d intended on buying. She’d gone crazy for the pink ones. He didn’t even know what they were, but his wife was enjoying herself, so he’d put them in the cart.

As he closed the trunk he laughed. He was much too tired to plant them now.

Holly wiggled in her seat trying to latch her seatbelt when he climbed in behind the wheel. “Let me help you.” He took the buckle and slid it in.

“My fingers don’t work anymore.
Tracy says my designs

are starting to look like Picasso’s work.”

He started the car.
“I guess you’ll have to retire for a bit, then. We wouldn’t want your reputation to slip.”

“I think that if I’m not designing, I’d have more time to convince you to change the dress code for your employees.
I’m still not impressed by your
perky
staff.”

Gabe bit back his laugh, but she had a point.
Everything in his life had changed, and it was all because of Holly. At some point, he figured she’d start making changes in his business too. Up until now that had been a very separate part of their marriage, but it sounded like maybe that would be changing. It wrenched in his gut, but only because his business had been his safe haven. He supposed it was time to let Holly have her say in at Maguire’s.

The heavy Saturday traffic wasn’t uncommon with the weather being so nice. Everyone was out enjoying spring. Bicyclists crowded the streets. Sidewalks were full of people walking their dogs. In a few weeks, he and Holly would be pushing a stroller through the park, enjoying the fresh air and the view.

His mind clouded with the pleasure of it all.
The joy of marriage. The amazement of new life. The—

Holly screamed.

A blur passed before him. He gripped the steering wheel and gave it a sharp turn. His vision was obstructed as the car jolted. Something hit him in the face. His seatbelt caught and dug into his chest and neck. Then everything went dark.

“Gabe.”
The voice came from far away. “Gabe, open your eyes.”

Jasmine.

He tried to move, but he couldn’t.
His arm was pinned. His eyes wouldn’t open.

“Gabe!”
Her voice was louder, but his mind wouldn’t clear. “Gabe!” The voice wasn’t Jasmine’s.

Slowly he pried his eyes open.

Not again.

The car was crushed in around him. A tree was smashed into the windshield, and his door was pinning him into his seat. His face hurt as though someone had punched him. The air was cloudy, and his face stung. He realized that he’d been hit by the airbag, which lay deflated in front of him.

There were sobs coming from next to him.
He slowly turned his head to see Holly sitting beside him. Her hands were on her stomach, her face was bleeding, covered with cuts from the broken window.

He tried to focus, but his mind blurred.

Holly moaned. “Gabe! The baby!”

Her legs were covered in blood and she screamed again. He should help her. He should unclasp his seat belt. But his arms wouldn’t move, and blackness took over again.

“Gabe, wake up.” The voice was very familiar to him, but his body was numb.
“There he is.” The voice was his mother’s.

She was sitting next to him, his father just to her side, when he opened his eyes.

“Boy, you need to practice your driving skills.” His father gave him a steady nod.

“Where am I?” His voice was weak, and when he tried to move, pain shot through him.

His mother brushed her hand over his hair. “You’re in the hospital. You were in a car accident.”

“Jasmine.” There was panic in his voice.
He looked at his mother, and her expression told him something horrible had happened. She exchanged a look with his father, who squeezed his eyes shut. No. That wasn’t right. He tried to clear his mind. “Holly.”

It had happened again.
Something had darted into the street. He didn’t even know what it was. He’d swerved to miss it and hit the tree. He tried to move his arm, but he found it

bandaged against him. The flash of Holly sitting in the seat next to him holding her stomach hit him. Her legs had been covered in blood. The baby. He felt the wave of nausea rise and the pain in his heart—his life had been torn apart again.

“
Mom, where’s Holly? The baby. The baby!”

His mother put a gentle hand on him.
“Listen, you hit your head awfully hard. Don’t go jumping around.”

“Where are they?
God, don’t tell me they died. Don’t you dare tell me they died.” Tears stung his throat and his eyes. The monitor to his side began to chirp faster as his heart rate kicked up. How long had he been out of it if his mother was sitting next to him?

His parents exchanged glances, and anger brewed in him.
Not again. He wouldn’t live if it happened again.

The door to the room opened, and a doctor walked through.
“Well, look who finally woke up.”

The lightness in the man’s voice irritated him.
He wanted to jump from the bed and strangle the next person he saw. There was no reason to live if he had nothing to live for.

The door opened again. Dear Lord, he wanted out of the bed.
He wanted to throw himself…

A nurse pushed Holly through the door in a wheelchair.
An IV bag dangled above her and the cord went to her arm. Her eyes were black, and raw-looking cuts covered her face. But she was alive. She was there, and her belly still looked like a beach ball in her lap. But that was no guarantee. Was it?

“You look like crap,” she said, and she smiled at him.
God, she smiled at him. What pain must she be in? She looked at the doctor. “Can he get up yet?”

“We need to give him a few minutes to get his bearings.
Once the drugs wear off, he’s going to be in some pain, but as

soon as he gets his…” The doctor stopped talking and they all looked down at Holly, who’d blown out a deep breath.

“What’s going on? Holly, are you okay?”

“Um.” She sucked in another breath.
“Can you get up?”

He shifted against the bandages. “I don’t know.”

“Well, listen.
I’ve been holding onto this baby for the past twelve hours, waiting for you and that bump on your head to”—she winced—“go down. You’re not a lot of use to me with your broken arm and bruised leg, but this baby isn’t going to wait any longer.”

“Baby.
The baby is okay?”

The doctor stepped closer to the bed. His face was serious.
“The baby is going to be early. He’ll need to stay here for a few weeks in the neonatal intensive care unit, but your wife’s doctor said the ultrasound looks good.”

“I can’t do this without you,” Holly said, and the doctor moved.
She clenched her teeth. “But I need to do this now.”

Gabe nodded.
He’d do anything to see the baby. He needed to be with them.

The nurse who had wheeled Holly into his room rushed her back out while another brought in a wheelchair for him.
His mother fussed over him while the nurse gathered lines to the IV bags attached to his arm and his father helped adjust the cords attached to the set of monitors that would travel with him.

If it was only a bump on the head and a broken arm, why did he need all the crap to go with him?
But he didn’t ask. He’d have stayed on the bed if they’d just have wheeled it to
Holly’s side.

By the time he was pushed into the room, Holly was a
lready screaming. The room was hot, and the smell of blood made him queasy. There were three nurses and a doctor, who stood between her legs. “The baby’s head is right here, Holly. Give me one good push, then relax.”

Gabe reached for her hand and looked her in the eye.
“I love you. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.”

“Apologize later.
Just be with me.” She screamed again and clasped her fingers around his hand so hard he thought she might break his bones.

“Okay, the head is out.
Don’t push.”

She turned to Gabe. Her face had lost color almost
immediately, and he could see the sweat build on her forehead. Her eyes pierced him with her desperation. “I have to push.”

“Holly.” Her mother’s voice came from the door.
“Relax, sweetheart. You’re doing great.”

Holly nodded, and Gabe looked around the room.
His parents and her parents stood on the sides of the room watching the miracle that he’d come so close to missing. He closed his eyes, and something told him not to worry. Everything was going to be okay. The baby was fine, even if she was early. They’d survived.

He looked back at Holly.
“You’re strong. You can do this.”

“Don’t leave me.”

“I’ll always be here. If that cart and that stupid horse didn’t run me over yet, it’s not going to happen now.”

Holly let out another shriek and squeezed his hand.

“Okay, Holly.
One big push and the baby will be here.”

Holly’s face turned red as she gave the last push.
The room filled with the shrill of a baby’s cry.

“Congratulations, it’s a girl.”

Gabe’s face hurt from the smile. He didn’t know if he could walk or even stand, but he pulled himself up to be next to his wife as they gazed down on the tiny, squalling bundle the doctor laid in Holly’s arms. She was covered in something Gabe would think later looked like oatmeal. When she wailed, her tiny mouth opened wide and her little lip would quiver. She had a full head of black hair, and he wondered just how much more she would have gotten in the following six weeks.

“Hello, Madison.” He reached his free hand out to his daughter.
“I love you.”