Casey Barnes Eponymous (27 page)

“I smoked pot six weeks ago.”

“She didn’t exactly get said info from
The National
Enquirer.”

“Casey.”

“Maybe if you give the news a bit more time to sink in it will
sit better.”

“I doubt it,” Leigh said, “and I don’t want to be around the
people who say they’re my parents in the meantime.”

“They are your parents.”

“Not biologically.”

Casey sighed.
 
“Did
you speak to Eva last night?”

“Why would I want to speak to her?”

Casey bit her lip.
 
Leigh was not going to budge from being pissed at the world.
 
That much was obvious.

“Will you still be around for lunch?”

“Maybe.”

During library period, Alex Deal came in.
 
“Yo.”

“Hey.”
 

He took a piece of paper out of his pocket and placed it on the
counter.
 
Casey reached for it.
 
“Is this--?”

“Yep.”

She opened the paper up and read.
 

Songs for Casey
 

1. Song 1 - “Young Folks” by Peter Bjorn

2. Song 2 - “Caring is Creepy” by The Shins
 

3. Song 3 - “Wild Horses” by The Rolling
Stones

She stared at the list for a moment.
 
A feeling pricked at her, even as she
tried to push it away.
 
“Awesome.
 
Thanks.”

“No sweat.
 
So I
guess I’ll see you at the show.
 
And
then, afterwards?”
 

“Yeah,” she said.

“You don’t sound so sure.”

“No.
 
I mean, yes.
 
I’ll see you later.”

“Young Folks” by Peter Bjorn.
 
There was nothing
wrong with the song.
 
It was
catchy.
 
Chic.
 
The problem, really, was with Tricia.
 
Tricia knew that song.
 
Not only that, but she was sick of
it.
 
When Tricia flew to London for business
she always flew on an airline that played “Young Folks” as the passengers
boarded.
 
A month prior Tricia had walked
by Casey’s room when it was playing and told her she was sick of it.
 
And therein was the rub: the song was
well known enough for Casey’s
mother
to be
sick of it.
 
In fact it was not only
used by the airline but it was in a movie trailer and a commercial.
 
Everyone knew that song.
 
Alex had to know that.
 
So why had he included it?
 
Hadn’t he wanted to introduce her to
something new?
 

“Caring is Creepy” by The Shins.
 
He got points for
including a Shins song.
 
Fine.
 
But that song was in the movie from
years ago with Natalie Portman and the guy from
Scrubs
that
annoyed the crap out of Casey.
 
Also--and yes, she remembered the quote Leigh read her from a girlie
magazine about how girls who were too picky never got boyfriends--but fuck
that,
this was another song everyone knew.
 
Maybe not Tricia.
 
Maybe not Tricia.
 
But the majority of the free world under
the age of twenty-one who did not attend bible camp?
 
They knew it.
 
Again he wasn’t introducing her to
anything new.
 
Not even close.

And then there was
“Wild
Horses” by The Rolling Stones.
 
Oh
my God!
 
If he had to include a
Rolling Stones song why not use something obscure from
Exile on
Main St.
like “Sweet Virginia” or “Let It Loose,” something she of
course knew but that was still fairly unknown to the average American
teenager.
 
But “Wild Horses”?
 
“Wild Horses”???
 
The Robinsons knew that song.
 
In fact if Mr. Robinson were to make
Mrs. Robinson a mix tape for their twentieth wedding anniversary--a stretch of
a thought, perhaps, but given the events of the past day Casey was no longer
ruling anything out--if he were to do that, he might include “Wild Horses” by
The Rolling Stones.
 
Because he was
middle-aged and had not been introduced to new music in two decades.
 
But Alex Deal had.
 

“Wild Horses” was unforgivable.

She was standing in front of her locker just before the last
period of the day, reading the list and scowling, when Ben walked over.

Ben, who had smiled at her when he came into Spanish and then
written a note about how much he liked the new song.
 
Ben, who, at the end of class, even gave
Casey a verb conjugation wheel his Mom’s students used.
 

“Did you read it?” he asked.

“Read what?”

“You mean you haven’t seen it yet?”

“Seen what?”

“Something I stuck inside the verb wheel.”

“Oh.”
 
She reached inside
her bag for the wheel.
 
“Sorry I
didn’t realize…”
 

There was a paper shoved into it that indeed she had not seen
before.
 
When she stood back up,
Ben’s face was red.
 
He took a step
away.
 

She took the paper out and looked at him, confused.
 
She opened it.

Casey Barnes Eponymous*

1. “Jezebel” by Iron and Wine

2. “Breathing Rapture” by Le Loup

3. “I Shall Be Released,” the cover Jeff
Buckley did on Live at Siné

*You’re getting there, amiga

She looked at him. “This is so weird.”

He got an embarrassed look on his face.
 
“Sorry. I just--”

“No, it’s not weird that you gave me the list.
 
I mean it is weird, but in a good and cool
way.
 
It’s just
coincidental
.
 
That’s the word I should’ve used.”

“Why?”

“Because…” She stopped herself.
 
Of course she could not tell him
why.
 
“Just because.
 
Anyway, thank you.”

She looked at the list again. Was it possible?
 
Why, she had Iron and Wine on her
iPod.
 
But “Jezebel”?
 
Didn’t have that song.
 
And
she had never heard
the Le Loup song before.
 
She’d
heard “I Shall Be Released,” the Joe Cocker version.
 
Of course.
 
But the Jeff Buckley cover?
  
Come to think of it she
had
heard it.
 
It
was a long time ago during a party Yull had.
 
Casey heard it from the other room and
wondered who was singing it.
 
She asked
Yull the next day and he said Jeff Buckley, but on an obscure live
recording.
 

She felt her cheeks go red.

“Do you like it?” he asked.

“Yes Ben.
 
I do.”

35

Talent show performers waited their turn in the hall adjacent
to the auditorium.
 
When whispers or
giggles erupted amongst them, Ms. Vernon got irritated and told them to hush.
 

As if Casey needed any more impetus to whisper to Ben.

“Why Jezebel?” she asked as soon as he sat down next to
her.
 
He shrugged.
 
“I googled it, today after school,” she
continued, “Jezebel was an ancient princess whose name’s nowadays synonymous
with strong-willed women of ill repute.”
 
She sat up straighter.
 
“I
have no problem with you calling me a Jezebel, for the record.”

Ms. Vernon marched over.
 
“Shh.”

“What does the word Jezebel make you think of, Ms. V?” Casey
asked.

“Casey I am only going to warn you once about talking.”

“Right.”

Ms. Vernon walked away.

“So
maybe
I
was referencing the strong-willed part,” Ben whispered.

“But not the woman of ill-repute one?” She did not try to hide
her disappointment.

He smiled.
 
“I can
throw you that bone.”

She briefly pumped a fist in the air.
 
“Moving on.
 
I’ll hold off on commenting about song
number two and skip to song three.”

“Shh!” Ms. Vernon hissed.

Casey saluted her and lowered her voice a notch.
 

“What about it?” Ben whispered.

“
I shall be released
from what?”

“What makes you think the song title was meant to be taken so
literally?”

“Because I know you.
 
It was.”

He blushed.
 
“You
shall be released from trying.”

“Trying what?”

“Trying to know.”

“But what?” she asked.

“You’ll
know
what I
mean.”

“But I want to
know
now.”

He rolled his eyes.
 
“Knowing how you fit into it all.”

“You don’t think I know that already?”

“Actually I think you know that more than most people.
 
But I think sometimes you’re not
entirely comfortable with it so you get in people’s faces.”
 
He paused.
 
“Just an observation.”

She stared at him for a moment before speaking.
 
“Back to song two.”
 

Ms. Vernon walked over again.
 
“If you insist on keeping this up, I may
be forced to remove you from the show.”

Casey shook her head.
 
“Empty threats are beneath you, mademoiselle.”

Ms. Vernon walked away.

“Song two,” Casey began, “Le Loup, made me feel like I was
doing something I wasn’t supposed to be in the middle of the night.
 
Which, for the record, I was, the night
we, you know…”

Ben’s face got redder.

“It was, if you don’t mind me saying, a rather romantic song,” she
continued.
 
He looked down.
 
“And yet, you refer to me as ‘amiga’ on
that there playlist.
 
Care to
comment on the dichotomy?”

“Do
you
care to
comment on it?”

And of course, of course, Alex Deal chose that moment to
saunter over.

“Hey,” he said.
 
Ben
scowled.
 
Casey looked from Ben to him
and then back to Ben again.
 
“Did
you like the songs?” Alex asked.

“What songs?” Ben asked.

“I made her a playlist.”

“You what?” Ben said.

“Made her a playlist.
 
She asked me to.”

“You did?” Ben said.