Charlene Sands (21 page)

During his entire trip to Cedar Flats, he couldn’t get Emmy off his mind no matter how hard he’d tried. He thought of her all day long, and during the night, he’d dream of her rich melodic voice. It lured him to her, like a siren’s song. It wasn’t to be, he told himself again. Yet the notion of her marrying Harper,
her friend,
churned like soured milk in his gut. Emmy deserved more than a refined complacent marriage.

He coaxed Lola into a trot heading toward the house and, within a few minutes, he spotted Rachel. She looked up from tending her garden and for one instant her eyes sparkled with joy. But the light went out quickly when she realized she wasn’t staring up at her husband, Josh, but his brother, the man who had identical features. And in that moment, Bodine knew the depth of her pain. Raw guilt ate at him, and he convinced himself he was doing the right thing.

“Hello, Rachel.”

“Bodine,” she said, standing and wiping her hands on her apron. “It’s good to see you.”

Rachel smiled, unable to hide her devastating beauty behind a face smeared with dirt and tangled honey-blond locks that caught the morning light. Josh had been smitten immediately. But Bodine looked at her and thought only of Emmy’s soulful brown eyes and sweetly slender body.

“Metcalf’s dead. I thought you’d like to know.”

Rachel peered down at the vegetable beds she’d been weeding and sighed. She glanced back up at him. “I thought I’d feel something. But I don’t. It won’t bring Josh back.”

“It’s justice.”

“Yes,” she admitted. “And now it’s over.”

Bodine dismounted and walked toward her. “We need to talk.”

Rachel nodded. “Come inside. I’ll fix you something to eat while the baby’s sleeping.”

Twenty minutes later, Bodine pushed his plate away. “You’re a good cook, Rachel. It was the best stew I’ve tasted.”

Rachel sat across the table, watching him closely. “I know why you’re here, Bodine.”

“Good, that’ll make this easier. I’m moving in. I’ll run the ranch for you. I’ll be a father to the baby.”

Rachel picked up both their empty plates and walked over the sideboard. She set them down slowly and turned to him, bracing her body against the counter. “I know that’s what you promised Josh.” Rachel’s blue eyes misted with tears. “But what if I said no, Bodine? Then what?”

Bodine stood and stared at her. Puzzled, he said firmly, “You can’t say no, Rachel. It’s a solemn vow I made to Josh.” He reached into his pocket and laid sixteen hundred dollars in cash down onto the table, all the money he had in the world. “This is for you…us. To keep the ranch going.”

Rachel stared at the money. “That’s from the reward for Metcalf, isn’t it?”

“Not all of it, but some. Yeah.”

Bodine had offered Theresa Metcalf half the proceeds from the reward, since she’d been the one to really down the man, but she’d refused, calling it “blood money” that she could never spend. Bodine understood. She’d killed her brother. So, instead he’d donated her half to Reverend Truman’s church in Turner Hill. It seemed the right thing to do and Theresa was glad of it.

“It’s very kind of you,” Rachel said politely, but Bodine knew what it meant when a woman set her chin just so. He recalled Emmy doing the very thing many times.

“Hell, Rachel. I’m not being kind.”

She smiled at his obvious impatience. “You sound just like Josh.” She cast him a thoughtful look. “It’s a generous offer. And I’m not speaking only of the money. But I have to refuse.”

Dumbfounded, Bodine asked, “Why?”

“Sit down, Bodine, and I’ll explain.”

He took his seat and she slid into the seat facing him again. “I loved Josh with all of my heart. You know that. We shared so many wonderful times. I lie awake nights, crying for missing him so much.”

“It’s my fault. I’m trying to make up for it,” Bodine said, feeling every bit of her anguish, the pain of losing his brother still raw.

“That’s just it, Bodine. It wasn’t right of Josh to ask it of you. I know he was thinking of my needs and the baby’s, but it’s not fair.”

“I’m trying to make it right, Rachel. It’s fair to me.”

“It’s not fair to me, Bodine. Don’t you see? I can’t live here with you. See you every day. Pretend that I’m happy. God love you, but you’re not your brother. What do you think it would do to me to see his face in the morning and, for that one miraculous instant, believe God had given my husband back to me?”

“I never thought on it that way.”

“No, neither did I, until I saw you ride up today. I realized I couldn’t live with that moment of hope only to be disappointed each day. And what about you? You never wanted to settle down. I’ve never known you to stay in one place long. How fair would it be to saddle you with responsibilities like that? You might find someone, Bodine. You might want to have true love in your life.”

Bodine took in a full breath. His eyes flickered when an image of Emmy popped into his head.

“What, Bodine? Have you found someone?”

Bodine shook his head. “It’s probably too late.”

Rachel placed her hand over his and gently rubbed. “Maybe it’s not. Listen to me, Bodine. I’ll be fine. I need time to mourn the loss of my husband. I’ve managed to hire a foreman for the ranch who has been very helpful. It’s a small ranch. The baby and I don’t need much.”

A loud, piercing cry interrupted their conversation. Rachel grinned. “Someone just woke up. Excuse me, I’ll be right back.”

Bodine rose and paced the floor, glancing out the window. He hadn’t noticed how well groomed the place looked, how well Rachel had managed without Josh. She’d always been one determined woman. Josh had cherished her and put her up on a pedestal, always protecting her. Maybe she was right and she could manage the ranch on her own. And maybe, one day she’d find love again.

Bodine couldn’t give her that. His heart belonged to another.

She returned shortly, holding a cooing baby in her arms. Without qualm, she handed the little one over to him, whispering in the babe’s ear, “Say hello to your uncle.”

Bodine held the baby awkwardly. The boy smiled at him, his cherub face rosy and full of health. “How old is he now?”

“Johnny is seven months.”

Bodine swallowed hard, keeping his eyes on Josh’s son. “Every time I hear his name, I—”

“It’s a good name, Bodine. Strong, like his uncle. It’s what Josh and I wanted.”

Humbled, Bodine closed his eyes momentarily. “I know.”

“Now, I’d better feed him,” she said, reaching for her son. “He’s got a Bodine appetite. And you’ve got some thinking to do.”

“Josh was right in marrying you, Rachel. He was a lucky man.”

She smiled and reached up to kiss his cheek. “You’re welcome to stay as long as you like, but if I were you, I’d go after your woman.”

And the next day, after convincing Rachel to take at least half the cash he’d offered, Bodine headed out to hunt down his most prized bounty of all.

“Aren’t you going to wish me happy birthday?” Emma asked her grandmother and father. Both stood in her room with sad, hopeless expressions.

Set and determined to marry today, Emma glared at both of them, waiting for a cheerier greeting. Even Carlotta Dubois would marvel at the wedding gown of pure silk and the beaded snowy veil she wore. She’d commissioned it as soon as she’d returned home and paid the Fresno seamstress double to have it ready by Christmas day.

“Happy birthday, Emma Marie,” her father said. “It’s our first one together. I’d hoped to see you happy today.”

Emma lifted up her lips. “I’m happy, Father. Don’t you see me smiling?”

“Emma, dear,” her grandmother began, “you’re hurt and angry still. There’s no rush in marrying Grant. He’ll wait. You need to be sure.”

“
Now
you say I need to be sure? Gram, it didn’t seem to matter before when I wasn’t sure.”

Emma had been so blindingly angry with her grandmother for hiring Bodine to protect her that she could barely begin to forgive her. But her father had insisted on coming home with her and, while on their journey, he’d calmed her down enough to make her see reason. The reverend really was a good man. He’d helped her through her unbearable hurt and sense of betrayal, but what he couldn’t do was talk her out of this marriage.

“Oh Emma, I always wanted you to be sure. But I’m a selfish old woman who wanted to see you settled before I passed on. I didn’t realize you’d fall in love with someone else.”

“I don’t love anyone else!” Emma refused to think about Bodine today. “I love Grant. I’m going to marry him. I want your blessings. Is that too much to ask?”

“Emma,” her father began, the intelligence in his eyes not to be missed. He wore a dark suit of fine cloth and was a handsome man in his forties. Her mother must have loved him desperately. “I’ve lived with regrets all my life. Don’t make a mistake today. That’s all I ask. And if you can honestly say you’re happy with your decision, then you have my blessing. I’d be honored to perform the ceremony.”

“Thank you.” She turned to her grandmother, who looked elegant today in a beautiful sapphire-blue gown, but the usual serene look on her face was missing. “Gram?”

“Oh, my sweet Emma. You’ve always been impetuous, but I’ve come to realize you’re a grown woman. Twenty years old today. If you want to marry Grant, then yes, you have my blessing.”

Emma ignored the sweeping sorrow on both their faces and lifted her skirts, barely sparing herself a glance in her cheval mirror. “Well, then. It’s time.” She whisked out of her room and proceeded to the backyard lawn where her guests awaited the ceremony.

Grant stood in front of the rose-entwined gazebo, amid one hundred guests. Her father, Reverend Truman strode to the top step of the gazebo as a five-piece orchestra played softly. Emma hummed a lively tune in her head, smiling at Grant from her place in back, holding one single long-stemmed red rose as her whole body trembled.

Oddly, Grant didn’t return her smile. And as she walked toward her groom, his face became increasingly worrisome. When she reached him, he took both of her hands in his and gave her the warm, knowing smile she’d trusted through the years.

Grant closed his eyes briefly. Just as her father began the ceremony, he spoke up. “Stop! Please, Reverend Truman.” He peered at her father. “I can’t marry your daughter.” Then he turned his attention to Emma. “Sorry, Emma. I want this. You know I do. But I know you too well. We’re friends, you and I. You’ll never love me the way a woman should love the man she marries.”

Emma’s trembling stopped. In that moment, Emma also realized how unfair she’d been to him. “Oh, Grant. I’m so sorry.”

She took her veil off and held it in her hand as she faced the guests in attendance. “I’m sorry to have you all come here. I—”

Emma stopped her speech, stunned to find Bodine riding up the aisle atop Lola. She set her gaze on him and couldn’t let go. Her heart raced like a jackrabbit. Her body shook uncontrollably. Bodine finally stopped a scant few feet from her. He was clad in buckskin and his black Stetson, and she’d never seen a more welcome sight. “Bodine?”

“Am I interrupting?”

Emma glanced around. The guests all appeared puzzled.

Grant turned to Bodine. “I’d say you’re right on time, mister.”

Bodine tipped his hat. “Glad to hear it.”

“What are you doing here,” Emma asked, fully astonished.

“Came to say something, Emmy.” Bodine ignored his audience and kept his stormy eyes on her. “From now on, you’re riding with me. That’s if you’ll have me.”

Emma remained silent, trying darn hard to figure this all out. Yet, just seeing Bodine again gave her cause to hope.

“I forgot to tell you something back in Turner Hill,” he said. “I love you, Emma Marie Rourke.”

She gulped air. “You do?”

He smiled. “Yeah. I do. Don’t think I can live without you. Don’t want to try.”

Emma walked closer to him, so that only he could hear her whisper. “What about Rachel?”

Bodine bent down to answer. “She’s doing fine without me. Told me to come after you.”

“Really?” Joy entered her heart. Emma could hardly believe he was here and that he had spoken words of love in front of all these strangers.

He nodded. “I’m gonna marry you, Emmy.”

“You haven’t asked me properlike.”

“Well, will you?”

Emma smiled, nearly bursting with happiness. It was the best offer she’d had in her entire life. “I’m staying on in Fresno. My father’s going to start up his church here. I’ll be leading the choir. If you can live with that, I’ll be your wife.”

Bodine grinned and Emma’s heart flipped over. “I’m done bounty hunting. We’ll get us a ranch. So, are you riding with me?” He reached for her.

Emma debated half a second, looking over at Grant. He gestured for her to go on. Lord, he was such a dear friend. Then Emma grabbed Bodine’s hand and he lifted her onto his horse.

Bodine glanced at her father. “If you’re willing to do this later, we’ll say our vows then. Right now, I need some time alone with your daughter.”

Her father nodded his approval. “If that’s what Emma wants, I’m sure we’ll all be here.”