Chasing the Fire (Backdraft, Fully Involved, Flashover) (4 page)

As if Tony read his mind, he asked, “Is it
Jane? I got a pretty good understanding of relationships. Sophia
and I met in high school, like you two did.”

“I didn’t know that. And yeah, it’s Jane, at
least partly.” He thought about the last few days since his mother
came over and how he and Jane had been distant. How he’d avoided
her on their whole tour off. How last night, he’d heard her crying
in the bathroom, which had just about killed him, especially when
he’d tried to get inside and she’d locked him out.

“We’re not getting along is all.”

“People say the same thing about you two as
they do about me and Sophia. You’re a match made in heaven.”

“I know. But something’s come between us.”
Had been between them for eight years, he guessed.

“Does finding your father in that abandoned
building have anything to do with it?”

He felt himself closing down, so he nodded
and said, “I can’t talk about it.”

“I know what he did. I know he spent two
years in jail. But I heard he went to the city.”

Riley got up. “Sorry, Tony. I can’t.”

“Okay, but remember what I said about this
affecting your job.” Riley started away. “Wait a sec.” He fished
for something in his drawer and handed Riley a card. “This is Jack
Harrison’s number. He helped us through some rough waters.”

Riley took the card and walked out of the
office thinking,
Jesus, the fucker
is
affecting my
job
.

His phone rang as he reached the kitchen.
Jane’s number. He clicked on, needing to hear from her. “Hey,
sweetie,” he said, hoping the whole strain between them would just
blow over and they could be who they were four days ago.

“Hi, Rye. Listen, Claire Anderson’s kid is
sick. I’m going to sub for her on the day shift tomorrow.”

Some of the guys were around the table, so he
walked through the kitchen door out to the backyard and sat on top
of a picnic table. It was dark, but he needed the privacy and the
evening was warm. “Did you already agree?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“I was hoping we could talk when we got home
in the morning.”

“I’m surprised.”

“I know. I’m acting like a shit.”

“You are. I love you Riley, more than
anything else, and I’ll help you through this. But you can’t make
me feel like you do about your father or agree with what you’re
doing to him.”

Suddenly, he saw his dad riding him around on
his back, throwing football after football to him, bursting with
pride at his and Jane’s Academy graduation. So he asked, “Have you
seen him?”

Another long silence. Then she said, “Abby
and I met for lunch and we went back to your house. I saw him.”

Huh! “Did you meet with Abby to talk about
me?”

“I’m not going to answer that. I never told
you before what Abby and I discussed, even if it dealt with you.
I’m not going to start now.”

He sighed deeply. He’d always respected that.
And he wanted Jane to have a confidant. They’d been each other’s
best friend and it hadn’t left room for other kinds of
relationships.

“So I won’t be home tomorrow. Be careful,”
she said, as they always did when they were on shift. It was a
superstition between them.

“Yeah, you too. Be careful.”

Then the line went dead.

He was about to go inside when someone came
through the gate of the firehouse yard. “Rye?”

His sister Abby.

Christ, they were all ganging up on him.

“Hi, Sis. Do I even need to ask why you’re
here?”

Crossing to him, she kissed his cheek. “Sit
down, baby brother.”

“I don’t want to talk about him, Abs.”

“Too bad. Now sit.” She used her
mother
voice on him. She and Aiden took in foster kids and
she knew how to be tough.

When he sat, she said, “He’s sick.”

Riley’s brow furrowed. “From drinking too
much?”

“He has a bad case of pneumonia.”

“Why didn’t they keep him in the
hospital?”

“Because he had a place to go. And because he
has no health insurance.”

“Mom said she was taking him home, but I
didn’t know he was sick.”

Abby’s brow furrowed. “Didn’t Janie tell
you?”

“She knew?”

“Uh-huh.”

Goddamn it.

“He’s staying in your old room, not with Mom,
if that matters to you.”

“Hell, I hadn’t even thought about that.”

“No, you’re too busy being all mad and stupid
about it again.”

Jane told Abby that? She had no right. He’d
been careful to keep his feelings from Abby, too, a decade ago. Had
Jane shared his real feelings even then? That pissed him off.

“You’re not a firefighter. You don’t
understand.”

“That’s bullshit. America’s Bravest has been
my family as much as it’s been yours and Janie’s. I don’t have to
walk into burning buildings to be part of them.”

He didn’t respond because he knew she was
right.

“He’s our father, Rye.”

Riley remained stubbornly mute.

“I cannot believe this side of you.”

Janie had said something similar. Nastily, he
said, “Sorry to disappoint you.”

“Don’t make
me
sound like the
judgmental one in the family.”

For one brief second, he wanted to pour his
heart out to her as he had when he was a kid and got into scrapes
at school. He’d always felt better after talking to his big sister.
But with this, with matters concerning his father, he couldn’t.

So he stood. “I gotta go. We have training.”
Which was true, but not till later.

She shook her head. “Fine. But I’m here,
always. And so is Janie. For now.”

Her ominous last words stayed with him the
rest of the day.

oOo

ON THE THIRD
night of the shift at
the firehouse, Riley was in even worse shape than yesterday. Janie
was working all day and she hadn’t called—so he hadn’t called her,
either—then they both worked tonight, so he hadn’t seen her for
forty-eight hours. Which rarely happened. They’d never been apart
for any significant length of time. Even during their Academy days,
they’d lived and trained together.

Dinner wasn’t for an hour and Langston had
KP, so Riley headed to the workout room to let off steam. He
entered the large, well-equipped space to find Nick Evans running
on the treadmill. Nick was personable enough, but Riley had heard
that something had gone down in New York that had made him come
here and settle into a smaller fire department. He’d made captain
in record time.

“How’s it hanging, Gallagher?”

“Hunky-dory.” There was a bite to his tone,
which he regretted. He didn’t want to spread his dirty laundry
around.

The shame was all yours, Rye.

I’m not the judgmental one.

No, he wouldn’t think about his mother or
sister or Jane, the three women who took sides with his father
against him. In the back of his mind, something niggled at him that
he was thirty-one, not thirteen, and he should starting acting his
age. But he banished the thought.

Think of something else.

He jumped on the treadmill next to Nick and
asked, “You doing good, Cap?”

“Yep. Always am.”

That wasn’t exactly true. Although Nick
Evans, forty-two, was even-keeled and a little detached most of the
time, once in a while temper—and suppressed emotion—burst out of
him.

But Riley wanted to keep the conversation
neutral. “Heard anything about the lieutenant’s exam yet?” Both he
and Jane had taken the test a few months ago. Both wanted to excel
in the department by being the youngest to make officers.

“You’ll be the first two to know.” He gave
Riley a brief smile. “Both of you’ll ace it. And,” he added, “A
position’s opening up on Engine Four.”

“Janie’s house?” Apparently there was a lot
she didn’t tell him.

“Uh-huh.”

“Openings are rare. Lots of people have to
wait a while to get an officer’s spot.”

“If you make lieutenant, you might want to go
to the Academy. It’s good experience to train recruits. And gets
you bonus points with the brass.”

“I’d hate that.”

Nick slowed to a trot. “Your dad didn’t.”

“Excuse me?”

“Your father took some time off the line to
train recruits. I was in his class.”

“I never knew that.”

“Well, it’s obvious you don’t want to talk
about your old man.”

He started to snap at the captain but
contained himself. Officers commanded respect. “Would you, Cap? In
my position?”

“When I was your age, no. Now that I’m old, I
see things differently.”

“You’re a real Methuselah.” He waited. “Rumor
has it something happened to you in New York, but there’s no gossip
about it.”

“Which is the way I want things.” No denial
or affirmation. Nick shut off the machine and grabbed a towel from
the bar. “Word of advice? You can’t always fix what you broke. Some
things are irrevocable. Your father was a good man.”

Was
being the operative word.

But he didn’t argue with the captain. And he
tried to ignore that he was getting the same advice from
everybody.

oOo

JANE LET HERSELF
into the house about
eight the next morning. They’d had a quiet night shift at Engine 4
so she was rested and didn’t need sleep. She wondered how Riley was
doing. They always talked when they were on nights, when the
firehouse slept. But not this time. He was falling back into more
patterns than hating his father again. But then, she was doing the
same.

Crossing the kitchen to the sliding-glass
doors, she saw him out on the back deck, staring into the yard. He
had the greatest shoulders, wide and muscular. This morning, he
wore shorts and a green T-shirt. Her anger at him softened by her
attraction, which sparked at the worst times, she walked out onto
the deck.

And found him with a can of beer in his
hand.

“Little early to be knocking back the booze,
isn’t it, hotshot?” The old nickname usually amused him.

“Just add it to the list of what you don’t
like about me.”

“O-kay.” She refused to take the bait and
instead dropped down across from him in a chaise. “How was your
shift?”

“Quiet.”

“Mine, too.”

He pierced her with a cold, green gaze. “Why
didn’t you tell my there was an opening for lieutenant coming up in
your house?”

Wow, she hadn’t expected that! She didn’t
really know why she hadn’t told him. “I’m not sure. I guess I
forgot about it.”

“We talk about our careers all the time.”

“I don’t know why, Rye. Honestly.”

“Okay, then maybe you know why you didn’t
tell me my father is sick.”

She felt her face flush. He must have talked
to his mother or Abby. “I know why I kept that from you. I think
it’s fairly obvious.”

“Yeah, it is.”

All right, she’d try again. “Will you
consider seeing him now that you know that he isn’t well?”

“No.”

She watched a bird make its way across the
sky and decided to change the subject. “Want to go run, since we’re
both rested?”

“Not really.”

“What do you want?”

He gulped back the rest of the beer and
turned to her. “I want things right between us, Janie.”

“Then we won’t talk about your father.”

“We’ve been avoiding that and still we’re
oceans apart, like the last time. Do you know why?”

“Do you?”

“Yeah, you said I’m not the man you thought I
was. You and Abby both said you don’t know this side of me.”

“Rye, I can’t make that not be true. Listen,
I’ll go see Jack Harrison with you. We can talk about that, how I’m
helping to distance us, then you can get some individual
counseling.”

“I’m not going to therapy over the man who
ruined our lives.”

“Then I don’t know how to bridge this gap
between us.”

She waited for him to suggest sex. They were
on the same wavelength about that. Many women refused to make love
when they felt distanced from their partner, but Janie agreed with
most
men
—it was a good way to get closer.

But Riley didn’t suggest a trip to the
bedroom. Instead, he got up, followed her inside and snagged
another beer from the fridge.

Jesus, this was going from bad to worse.

oOo

“
GALLAGHER AND DUNCAN
, get two
backboards out of the Midi.”

Just the Quint and Midi—and no rescue
squad—had been called to the scene because of a major accident at
the lake that required all rescue-squad personnel. Since McCabe, a
paramedic, had been summoned out there, Riley filled in on the
Midi. Though he wasn’t a certified paramedic, all firefighters were
EMTs.

Ramirez added, “There are multiple victims
between the truck and the Camaro.”

Riley followed Lisa Beth, a paramedic on his
shift, to the small rig. “You like EMS, Gallagher?”

“Yeah. It’s a change. You?”

“Uh-huh. Except when we have to go to
Memorial. There’s a doctor there who treats us like shit.”

He pulled one board out of the Midi. “Who is
it? I only know the nurses.”

“Of course you do.” Lisa Beth took a
backboard, too. “How’s Janie?”

“Good,” he lied.

“When are you two gonna tie the knot?”

Who knew, now? They hadn’t gotten around to
setting a date. Hell, he hadn’t even bought her a ring, since she
thought jewels were a waste of good money. She preferred the ring
he’d given her sixteen years ago.

“Let’s hustle over,” he said, ducking her
question.

They hurried back to the crash site, though
they both knew they’d have to wait until the Quint gained entry to
the cars. “Janie and you?” Lisa Beth repeated when they
arrived.

“I don’t know when we’re gonna get hitched.
There never seems to be much of a hurry.”

“I hear ya. Divorce is a bitch.” He knew Lisa
Beth was in her thirties, divorced and dated periodically, but not
much else about her. She wasn’t as warm and open as Jane was. Or as
Jane used to be.