Choices (9 page)

Kassey laid in wait for Ben, practically jerking him out of the aisle as he walked through the barn.

“God woman, can’t you wait until tonight?” Ben joked as he pulled her into his arms, and leaned down for a kiss. Kassey let him kiss her, melting as she always did, marveling that after all this time, he still could make her melt. Then she pushed him away.

“I had a talk with Abby.”

Ben sighed, and rolled his eyes. “Kassey, what did you say? You didn’t get nosy, did you?”

She punched him in his stomach and he grunted for show.

“I heard you and Logan talking-“

“Were you hiding in a stall again? That’s why I couldn’t find you!”

“No, I was getting ready to go on a ride, then you two walked in, talking about Abby. Logan loves her, Ben, and it’s tearing him up. After you left, Abby came in, and he treated her like she was just another guest. It was heartbreaking to see.”

Ben looked down at his wife, the woman he had fallen in love with at first sight, and drew parallels. She had been about to divorce a bastard when they met, and it had never given him a moment’s hesitation. Logan was stubborn, and he had a sense of right and wrong that left no room for errors. He held himself to such a higher standard that Ben had wanted to shake some sense into him more times than one.

“Babe, Logan can’t be forced into doing anything he thinks is wrong, you know that.”

“It’s not wrong!”

He lifted a hand to brush a lock of hair off her forehead, and pressed his lips to the spot.

“Just because we think it’s not wrong doesn’t mean he won’t.”

Kassey wrapped her arms around him, and snuggled in for warmth.

“He didn’t think it was wrong when we met. Hell, he helped me go get the rest of my stuff from the house.”

“Yeah, but it wasn’t him in the situation. He doesn’t judge, you know that.” He leaned back and looked down at her, “You really like Abby now, don’t you?”

“Yeah I do. We ended up going for a ride, and talked. She’s messed up about the whole thing with her ex-husband, but I think I changed her mind about going back to him. She’s good people. It helped that she wasn’t dressed like a fashion plate. I guess we should just let them work it out for themselves, huh?” Kassey pulled away from him, and took his hand, a gleam in her eye.

“What was that about waiting for tonight?”

The next day, Logan was out in a remote pasture, replacing fencing. He had been trying since the day before to take out his frustration on hard work, and it had barely made a dent in what he was feeling. He crouched down in the snow, hands hanging between his knees. He hadn’t seen Abby since he had pretty much dismissed her, the green pools of her eyes reflecting the hurt in them.

. Ben thought he was in love with her, but can someone be in love after only two days? Logan was a far cry from a cynic, but he didn’t think it was possible. True, Ben and Kassey talked all the time about how they had known the minute the first saw each other that it was love, but Logan had never experienced that.

All he knew was for sure was that Abby made him feel things he had never felt; the instant jolt of pleasure so intense it made him ache immediately when he touched her, the heating of his blood when she looked at him, and the certainty that he would just as soon stay up all night talking to her instead of making love to her. Hell, he already did that, and it was one of the best nights of his life, even though she had fallen asleep in the middle of it.

Would it be different if he could have her? Was it just the challenge, because she was off-limits? He had no way of knowing. He didn’t think so, but it didn’t matter.

He stood up and walked back to the truck. He got in and got the truck started, and pointed it toward home. He had been thinking about what to do and still hadn’t come to any kind of decision regarding her. He couldn’t keep aloof for long, because he just couldn’t stand to hurt her. If this was love, it would just have to unrequited, because as long as she wasn’t sure where she belonged in the world and unsure of herself, he couldn’t do a damn thing about it.

Last night had taken all his self-control not to get in the truck and drive down to her cabin and beg her to leave her life in Boston and be with him, then spent the rest of the night wrapped up in dreams so vivid he had to take another cold shower in the morning. He should get used to that in the next week or so.

At dinner, Kassey and Ben had gone on about the Valentine’s
Day dance at Circle B Ranch the following week, acting like a pair of matchmakers, but Logan had just ignored them. He wasn’t even sure he would go. He usually didn’t miss it, not because of the dancing, but he used it to catch up with other ranchers and see how their winter was going.

He would just be her friend, a shoulder to cry on if she needed it, but nothing else. She would probably go back to Boston and back to her old life, but even if she didn’t, and stayed in Montana she would probably forget about Logan in the process of trying to get her life back in order.

It was a crappy plan, but he didn’t have any other options.

As he pulled into the barn area, he saw Ben, Kassey, and Jake sitting on the top rails of the corral, and as he stopped the truck and got out, he heard Jake let out a whoop. He smiled, and walked towards them, wondering what could have brought that out of Jake. As he got closer though, his steps slowed, and when he was up against the rails, he saw what had their attention.

Abby was on Ellie, whipping a lariat over her head, as she chased down a calf. It was poetry in motion to a cowboy, the quick flick of her wrist as she spun the lariat, her knees and thighs all that was guiding Ellie as they barreled down the ground of the corral, snow flying in all directions. With a smart flick of her wrist, Abby let the rope fly, and it landed neat-as-you-please over the calf’s head. She brought Ellie to a sliding stop, and jumped off, all in one fluid motion. She walked, hell she sauntered, thought Logan, over to the calf and released the rope, bowing low to the claps and hollers coming from her audience.

“Damn, you can take the girl outta the country, but not the country outta the girl!” Ben hollered, nudging Jake, who clapped his hands hard enough to break bones.

“I thought you were bluffing, Abby, but you showed me up.” Kassey laughed, then sobered as she looked down and noticed Logan standing there.

Abby looked up as the noise tapered off, and saw Logan at the fence, a booted foot on one of the lower rails, his arms crossed on the top rail.

Even from where she stood, she could see the smile tugging his firm mouth, his gray eyes lighting up.

“That sure was impressive ma’am.” He drawled, and clapped his hands together. Abby beamed inside, but graciously nodded her head. Jake snickered and Ben reached over and cuffed him on the head.

As he saw her standing there, her eyes alight with excitement, her generous mouth turned up in a huge grin, he knew then that he loved her, and would love her the rest of his life. He could fight it, and deny it, but it was there. The fact remained that he couldn’t have her, but at least he admitted that truth to himself. It would be hard to be near her and know he couldn’t do anything, but he would treat her like a precious gift, one that would be taken away from him.

Abby watched him, sensing a change in him. She hadn’t seen him since he left her in
the barn yesterday morning, and had spent a lonely night at the cabin. He hadn’t been around this morning when she had walked up to the main house to talk to Kassey, and she had the feeling he was avoiding her, but now he was here, smiling at her, and hope rose up inside her. She would tell him at the Valentines dance about her decision, and then would go from there. He would either accept her, or turn her away, but it would have to be enough.

She walked over to the fence and grinned up at him. “Bet you didn’t think I had it in me, did you?”

He shook his head, and returned her smile. “No, I doubted you, thought you were just blowing smoke.”

She reached up and poked his arm. “Never doubt a woman when she brags. We’re usually not bluffing.”

“I’ll keep that in mind from now on. Were you serious when you said you could run a fence line?” he asked, crossing his arms and shooting her a challenging glance. Abby took her time answering, wondering if he was offering up a truce for his behavior.

“Of course. If I can remember how to rope, I can remember how to string barb wire. What do you have in mind?” she asked as she walked toward Ellie, picking up the dangling rein.

Logan looked around, and noticed that everyone else had mysteriously disappeared. Resolute, he pressed on.

“I have to replace another couple of lines out in one of the pastures, and wanted to know if you’d like to come.”

Abby led Ellie over to the gate and walked her through and Logan fell into step beside her, shortening his stride to keep pace with her.

“Are you offering a truce Logan?” she asked coyly, sliding her eyes his way.

“I am. One more time, I’m sorry. I can’t seem to act right around you. I don’t think I’ve apologized more in my life than I have in the past three days.”

Abby laughed, feeling wonderful for the first time since yesterday morning.

“I would love to come out with you. I might not have done physical labor back in Boston, but I was quite active. I feel like I’m stagnating.”

Logan wondered what he was getting himself into, taking her out, alone, just the two of them, but he had resolved to be a friend and friends hung out together.

“Well, I’ll meet you out here at the crack of dawn tomorrow.”

Abby mock gasped and placed her hand on her chest in an outraged gesture.

“Crack of dawn, well that’s just not civilized. Maybe around noon?” she teased. He threw back his head and laughed the first laugh he’d had in days. It felt good.

“Ok, how about 8 o’clock and I’ll bring the coffee and donuts.”

“Deal”

They walked in companionable silence to the stable, Abby thrilled that he was opening up to her again. She thought about what she had told Kassey, how she would tell Logan at the d
ance about the move she was planning to make. Kassey had said that she should tell him sooner. Abby wasn’t sure about that. She wanted some time to get to know Logan better. Maybe now they would have the chance.

They reached the barn and Logan let her go in front of him.

“Do you want to come up to the house tonight for dinner?” he asked casually, opening the stall door so she could lead Ellie inside. He shut the door and leaned his arms over the top of it.

“Yeah, that would be nice. I had a lot of fun the other night. Everyone is so nice, especially now that Kassey and I have formed our own little truce.”

“Well, I’m going to go get cleaned up, so I’ll see you tonight at 6.” He knocked on the top of the door and walked away, whistling. Abby turned back to Ellie.

“I love men”

Chapter Six

Abby sat next to Logan in the truck, occasionally bumping in to him as the truck jostled over the ground. This did nothing to for her composure.

“Don’t you think you should replace the shocks on this thing?” she asked, reaching a hand out to brace herself on the dash.

Logan flashed a grin in her direction and intentionally aimed the truck at another bump in the ground. Abby laughed, and bounced again.

“It’s just an old ranch truck. As long as the engine runs, that’s all I care about.”

Abby nodded; she was familiar with that attitude.

They had met that morning outside the storage barn and Abby had wondered if she would ever get used to the sight of him. He had looked so good in the morning light, tall and strong.

He had seemed more comfortable around her, which Abby didn’t know how to take. She was glad for it, but was worried he had already lost interest in her. She was usually more confident and sure of herself, but she didn’t know where she stood with Logan, and that bothered her.

She still didn’t know much about him, where he came from, who his parents were, or even how old he was for that matter, but she figured she would spend the next couple of days finding out.

Now here they were, bouncing along a rutted track to a far pasture, with no one around them.