Choices and Illusions (27 page)

“You are a God experience walking.”

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Breaking the trance

Practical Metaphysics

However, let’s get back to “it’s never too late.” In my jour-

ney, there came a point when I hungered for more metaphysical

information. I enrolled in a California university, the University

of Metaphysics, and by correspondence commenced a study in

metaphysical science. This was not the metaphysics of an upper-

division philosophy course, as I expected; rather, it was a practical metaphysics for living. I had worked for a long time, often doubling the required number of exams in order to reach their designated

bachelor’s level of education in this unique field of study, when

they sent me the news. I was ready to advance, but to do so I had

to become an ordained minister.

This was not a strictly academic environment, and I should have

recognized that, but the requirement blindsided me. Still, I knew

that I was not worthy of being anyone’s minister, including myself.

Weeks passed, and one Sunday afternoon while reading spiri-

tual materials, I remembered a teaching from the school. I pulled

out a binder in which I kept many notes, and the letter from the

university fell upon the floor. As I picked it up, I knew immedi-

ately that I missed the lessons and all the joy and change they had brought into my life. I sat back down in my recliner and held the

letter in my lap.

My thoughts put me to sleep, and soon I was dreaming. This

is the dream:

the Fruit of the tree

Once upon a time, a man looked to himself and spoke:

“I desire to serve God, but my life has been full of error.

The example I have set is not that of a cleric. People will

only scoff and say, ‘Know ye them by the fruits of their

tree.’ Who am I, then, to speak for or of God?”

With these words circling within his head, the trou-

bled man lay down to rest. He spoke to God: “Your will,

not mine, be done.”

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CHOICES AND ILLUSIONS

As he drifted into sleep, pictures began appearing that

told this story:

Once there stood a tree—a tree of life that was full of

fruit. The limbs bent toward the earth under the weight of

the lush red cherries. The cherries danced in jubilee with

the breeze that bathed their tender skins and turned their

fullness and vivid color to face the Father, the Sun of the

heavens.

With the dew and the rain they would polish their

beauty and drink of the earth—to store within the energy

and vitality of life, taken from the soil through the roots

and fired with the spirit of the Sun radiating through the

leaves of their parent tree.

But alas, not all of the children of the tree would ma-

ture into lush red fruit. Out of an urge to experience and

learn on his own, one turned away from the Father and ig-

nored the parental warnings. Charlie, as he was known by

the others, kept his life juices warm, daring the cold, frost,

and elements. He began to fill with color and mature early.

Pivoting on his base, he turned away from the Sun

and took shade in the leaves. daring to fornicate with the

world, Charlie refused to release the natural pesticides

within himself and took up affairs with the parasites.

Soon his delicate skin was broken, and his fruit ex-

posed. The fragrance attracted the birds, and they too

feasted on his flesh. Charlie lived off the flesh and of the

world. Passion, experience, and knowledge were his prize.

Then one day the gardener came. Gently, he took from

the parent the pure and ripened children, leaving only

Charlie behind. Hanging alone, Charlie looked about him.

The fall nights were cold and lonely. His friends, the birds,

were on wing, abandoning him. His flesh had spoiled, and

even the insects avoided him now. His soul hung on to

his tattered body. The elements he had once faced with a

thrill now threatened to snap him from the stem of life.

Charlie was sad and lonely. He had learned these things:

knowledge is not necessarily wisdom, experience is not

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Breaking the trance

always a kind teacher, and passion is sometimes a poison

that betrays whatever value there is to be had in experi-

ence and knowledge.

Charlie looked up at the beautiful blue sky and the

buoyant, white, billowy clouds adrift, seemingly with

nothing to do or a care in the world, lazily on sail across

the vast blue heavens. “They and the lilies of the field,”

Charlie said to himself.

“dear God, I have sinned,” he spoke aloud. “I have

wasted the beauty of your flower and turned my back on

simple truths. In my pursuit of wisdom, I lost sight of Your

Great Form and indulged in physical illusions. I was lost. I

alone am to blame. I give my essence over to thee, Creator

of all that is good within me and all that could ever be love

within me. For you are Eternal love, and what is best for

me is also your way. That I should discover this so late in

my life is my most significant regret.

“I have watched the caterpillar spin his cocoon and

perch on the leaves above me as a butterfly,” Charlie con-

tinued. “But I fear that this recognition has come so late

in my life that I will be unable to share this Beauty, this

Truth, with others.”

With that, Charlie lowered his head. Suddenly, a squir-

rel jerked him from the limb and scampered down the

tree and across the meadow. The squirrel paused, exam-

ined Charlie, and then as though rejecting him, dropped

him in the grass.

Charlie rested there for a day or two, and then the

snow came. Covered by the white blanket, he slept.

The seasons passed as though in the twinkling of an

eye. Charlie took root and grew strong. From his branch-

es came blossoms, followed by fruit more beautiful than

Charlie could ever remember beholding.

Charlie praised and gave thanks to God!

The lowly man in my dream raised his head from

slumber. His prayer had been answered. The lord does not

forsake man; man forsakes the lord. Thy will, not mine,

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CHOICES AND ILLUSIONS

be done; for, after all, in their eternal, boundless beauty,

they are one and the same.

My life has changed since this dream. Today, many faces pro-

vide that warm, fuzzy feeling when I put my head on the pillow. I

enjoy my family and the lovely bride to whom I have been married

since 1990. In fact, my wife and I were to have only one child. I

committed to spend the first six years of his life with him and work from my home. So, I moved my office to my home and had a wonderful time. I stopped traveling and lecturing and spent the time

learning, writing, and administering a business. Then my youngest

was born. He too was due the first six years. The long and short of it is that for 12 years I sort of disappeared. When I reentered the world, so to speak, I was astounded by how many people thought

I had died. “I haven’t seen or heard from you for so long. I thought you were dead!” was not an uncommon line. Well, as that old saying goes, “Rumors of my death are greatly exaggerated.”

Today I can honestly say that those 12 years enriched my life

immensely. I do believe that everything happens for some reason.

I have practiced the messages in this book and can say to you in

heartfelt honesty, they work!

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The kingdoM wiThin

“I want to know God’s thoughts; all else are details.”

— A l b e r t e i n s t e i n

What if the world truly is magical? What if we were created

to be co-creators with all the power to manifest miraculous lives

if we but believed so? What if we were our own cheerleaders, full

of encouragement and rah-rah support? A friend of mine named

Terri Marie wrote a marvelous little book all about being our own

cheerleaders. The book, entitled
Be the Hero of Your Own Game,

suggests that we are usually good at encouraging others but then

tell ourselves all the reasons why we cannot succeed. What if we

believed that we were created with every good possibility in our

hands to be the very best of ourselves, to use our unique talents

and abilities in ways that might astound many, to have happiness,

peace, balance, and harmony every day in everything we do? What

if our Father in Heaven looked upon us with the love and blessings

that human parents have when they behold their newborn child

and with his all-good, all-powerful, and all-knowing best offered

all that he had to us?

What if we were created to be co-creators with all the

power to manifest miraculous lives if we but believed so?

I believe that God, or whatever term you are comfortable with

for the Creator, has done just that. Remember Mark Twain’s story

in his book
Letters from the Earth?
The point of the story was to 165

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CHOICES AND ILLUSIONS

hide God where humankind would never look. Hide him within

man—the last place people will ever look!

Mysticism

While I was lecturing abroad, a wonderful man approached me

with some questions. He had resigned his priesthood two years ear-

lier because he felt inadequate. He recognized that he had provided help to many but was disturbed that he himself was not worthy to

give good advice. His thoughts were not all pure, and besides, he

too was born a sinner.

We spoke for some time. I asked him several questions. In

the end, he admitted that no one could be worthy according to

that which he had been taught. like many, he had been trained

to believe that the
G
rand
O
rganizing
D
esigner had created him imperfectly. He was born a sinner, here to endure with courage

and faith the suffering that he would experience. Further, this very suffering was necessary for him to prove his devotion and love for

God. Since he had been a Christian priest, training for 12 years as such, I asked him about some of the words of Jesus. According to

Jesus, “The kingdom of heaven is within.” Further, “In my Father’s

house are many mansions,” “Why would you use my words and

not do my deeds?” “All that I do, you will do and more,” “If you

had faith but as tiny as a mustard seed . . .”—all of these quotations in context clearly suggest that God dwells within all of us. They

also suggest that Christ consciousness is what we should all seek to achieve. Indeed, Jesus states very clearly that we are all his brothers and sisters. nowhere does Christ suggest that we are poor, pitiful

creatures created to suffer. The message of Christ is love!

From here our conversation entered the domain of Christian

mysticism, and this led to the “I AM” presence. “I am that I am,”

spoken by God to Moses. The Great I AM presence is the kingdom of

heaven, or God/Christ consciousness within. (This is a study worth

undertaking, but one that is beyond the scope of this work, so I suggest the
I AM Discourses
published by St. Germain Press if you wish 166

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the Kingdom Within

to pursue this further.) I was then asked, “Is this the reason that all of your affirmations on InnerTalk programs begin with ‘I am’?”

My mind flashed back to a small bookstore in Reno, nevada,

where nearly 20 years before I was asked the same question. “Actu-

ally,” I answered, “the research shows this is the best way to state the affirmations. I do find it interesting that it is the declarative, ‘I am.’” We then spoke of prayer. The ancient texts were often interpreted incorrectly. The word
ask,
when translated correctly, should read
declare.
declaring is creating, not petitioning. At length we had traveled around the world and examined many religious systems.

We agreed, whether Christ consciousness or Buddha conscious-

ness, whether from the Upanishads or the Bible, whether lao-tzu

or Zoroaster, all the great living religions taught
love
at their core.

Suffering as some creation made imperfectly and therefore unable

to avoid sin, begging for salvation and so forth, was not the teaching. no—to the contrary, the God within created all with the

ability to manifest miracles, if they but had faith the size of a tiny mustard seed.

It was then that the lights went on in the mind of my new

friend. “Oh, I get it. When you teach people to suffer, even indi-

rectly, you claim suffering for them and yourself. How could I have missed that? no wonder I always felt guilty and ashamed.”

This gentleman has since made some remarkable changes in

his life. He still helps people, but now he empowers them to help

themselves. Through forgiveness, releasing guilt and blame and