Choices (The Forever series, Book Four) (23 page)

“Okay, but why would she want you walking in on them having
sex?”

“To send a message.”

“Oh?”

“After I got back from The Underworld, Sebastian found me
and wanted to talk to me. He pulled me into an empty conference room and we…had
words,” I say carefully.

“About what?”

“It’s nothing,” I say, brushing it off. “Devon came in and
asked him to leave.”

“Leave? Did he hurt you?” he asks forcefully.

“No, it’s nothing like that. Anyway, after Sebastian left,
Dev stayed and one thing led to another…”

“And you fucked,” he snarls, interrupting me.

“No,” I snap. “But Jess may or may not have walked in on me
half naked with my legs wrapped around him and his fangs in my neck.”

“Hm, so let me guess. He went after her and left you
unfulfilled,” he says. “And that’s why you should always feed after. It’s
called a ‘fuck and feed’ for a reason,” he adds idly.

I glare at him. “Indeed. That’s something you can fix
though,” I say seductively, moving closer to him, trailing my hands up his
chest.

“You want me to fix your desire for another man?” he asks
incredulously.

“But my desire for you is insurmountable, my love.”

“As is mine for you, but don’t you have somewhere you need
to be?”

“What? You want me to go down there? Why?”

He shrugs, “It might be fun.”

I chuckle, “Shall we then?” I hold my hand out to him.

“Of course.”

We stroll out of the suite and downstairs to Devon’s. I push
open the door as it is indeed open. We quietly stalk towards the bedroom where
as expected, Devon and Jess are hard at it. She is riding him like there’s no
tomorrow, clearly putting on quite the show.

I clear my throat.

Devon’s eyes pop open and find mine in surprise. “What the
fuck?” he asks, sitting up as Jess twines her arms around him, all smug and
self-satisfied, her point proven that he belongs to her now. Well, in her eyes
anyway.

“I was asked to come down here,” I hold up my phone.
“Although I am more inclined to think it was your little girlfriend here is the
one who asked.”

Devon stares at her and untwines her arms from around him,
pushing her slightly away. She tries to look innocent but fails miserably under
his bold blue gaze, and now self-consciously pulls the sheet up over her
breasts.

“Dev, we need to talk. Find me when you are done here.” I
turn to Jess and snarl viciously at her, more to scare her than out of any
actual rage. “Next time you ask me to walk in on you two fucking, you had
better be prepared for me to take back what’s mine,” I threaten.

She flinches and looks terrified as CK pulls me back. “Time
to go I think, my sweet.”

I let him lead me away and he smirks, “Yours?”

“Yes, mine. Just as I am yours.”

He looks pleased, “You are mine.” He reaches for the
necklace but hisses as he touches it and pulls back just as Sebastian did. I
frown as he asks, “I’m sure I don’t need to ask where you got that, but what is
it?”

“Hellfire,” I say cautiously and I realize that I am the
only Vampire who can touch it without burning. I’m pretty sure Xane knew
exactly what he was doing when he gave it to me. Arse.

“Hellfire. As in the same Hellfire that your faithful sword
is made from?”

I nod grimly. “I’ll take it off. I didn’t think. Sorry,” I
say as I unclasp it.

He shrugs as if it’s nothing. I don’t really want to take it
off but if it hurts my boys I will have to.

As it happens, Devon finds us in a very similar position
about twenty minutes later. “This is a bit of a
déjà vu
reversal,” he comments as he watches us.

CK growls at him, “At least let us finish. Go and wait in
the sitting room.”

Devon steps closer, “I could just join in.”

“Not this time,” CK says as he pushes me over and under him
and finishes us both off regardless of Devon’s presence.

I climb out from under him and pull my dress back on. “Wait
here, okay?”

He nods and lights a cigarette.

I find Devon on the sofa staring at his hands. I sit next to
him, relaxing at his nearness. He does too and angles himself towards me
instinctively.

“What’s going on Dev?” I ask him. “I need you to talk to me.
I need to fix this. I won’t have you abandoning me and talking to everyone else
except me,” I say, still stung by his actions.

“I’m sorry, Liv. I had to get away. Ever since we got back
from Lance’s, you’ve been so busy. Too busy for me. Even before you and Lincoln
started sleeping together, I was always last and it wasn’t fair. I was so used
to us being together all the time and then it was practically nothing. Apart
from the times I was with you and Cole, all you came to me for was a quick fuck
before you moved on to something else. Do you know the last time we shared a
bed? Spent all night together? Months, Liv, months,” he says without waiting
for an answer. “I love you but I can’t just be the last one you come to. Not
anymore,” he runs his hand through his hair.

I am upset that he feels that way, although I do see his
point. “I’m sorry, Dev. I have taken you for granted. I have just always
assumed you would be here no matter what. The others take work. They come with
drama and promises to be kept and threats and moods. But I know now that you
need me to fight for you too.”

He smiles at me as I have told him what he wants to hear.
“I’m sorry about just leaving. I should have talked to you about it. And I’m
sorry about Jess before. That was unnecessary. She is jealous,” he adds,
stating the obvious as usual.

“I see that. Are you two serious?” I ask, going for
innocence but not quite pulling it off.

“Yes,” he says hesitantly and a flash of pain goes through
me.

“Do you love her?” I ask.

“Yes. I think so. I don’t know. Probably not,” he says,
confused. “She says it so I say it back.”

“Are you planning on turning her?” I ask the loaded question
and hold my breath waiting for his answer which comes in a very shocked,
“Christ, no! Liv, you know that’s not my thing.”

I am somewhat relieved but press on, “But Cole tells me that
she wants you to.”

“She has asked. I told her no.”

“Why?”

“I don’t want to sire without love,” he says after a long
pause. Gee where have I heard that before? “I have to be sure and I’m not sure
because of my feelings for you. It is clouding everything else. It always has.
I’ve gone half a millennium and never found anyone I can love enough to want to
be with them forever. No one even comes close to what I feel for you.”

“I think that’s half your problem,” CK says from the bedroom
door. He is dressed just in sweats and I am pretty sure I start to drool, just
a little.

“This conversation is private,” Devon growls.

CK saunters over to us and sits on the coffee table in front
of me. “Well you are in my hotel room, our hotel room,” he amends at my look.
“Even if I wasn’t a Vampire I would still be able to hear you.”

Well he has us there.

“So what is your not-so-humble opinion?” I ask him as he
takes my hands.

“Devon,” he says, “you say you are in love with her.”

“Yes.”

“Are you sure about that? Take a long hard look at her.”

He does. “What am I looking at?”

“You are looking at Liv. Not Elizabeth. Liv is not the girl
you fell in love with. In fact if I recall the whole reason you left her in the
first instance was because she Shifted to her natural form and you said
yourself that she wasn’t.”

Devon and I are staring at each other in confusion. What the
fuck is he saying here?

“Constantine. I am still me,” I say and even I hear the lack
of conviction.

“No, my love. You are not Elizabeth. You are Liv. Whether
you like it or not you are different. I’m not saying, Devon, that you don’t
love her. Of course you do, she is your sire and you have a bond. A strong one.
In fact so strong that I have never seen the likes of it in all my years. You
live together, work together. Like each other.” He pauses and we are staring at
each other now dumbfounded.

“I think you need to separate your feelings for Elizabeth
from Liv. From Lexie, from Carrie, from Katherine and Svetlana and everybody
else since 1692 when Elizabeth Shifted. Even though she can Shift to Elizabeth,
she isn’t the same. She has grown, lived, loved, lost. Can you honestly look at
her now and say you are in love with her? Cole’s sire? His wife?”

Fuck me. Talk about insight. Where does he pull this stuff
from?

Devon looks at me. “I don’t suppose I have ever thought
about it in that way. I guess I have some thinking to do,” he says eventually.
“I do love you, Liv. I want you and desire you and we have something so
special; I don’t want to lose that. Ever.”

“Neither do I. Come home, to me.”

“It doesn’t change anything though. I won’t be last
anymore.”

“Tell me how to fix it,” I tell him quietly.

He pounces, “One day. One day a week where you are mine.”

So he’s clearly been sitting on that for a while.

CK clears his throat and I chew my lip doing a quick mental
check. Friday to Monday is for Cole, Tuesday and Wednesday for CK, Thursday for
Lincoln before Canada. Christ, he’s right, I don’t make time for him.
“Fridays,” I say quickly. Cole will suffer but he still gets me three days.
Fuck, this is hard.

“Done,” he says joyfully. His eyes flick to CK who is
looking, to my surprise, somewhat relieved that I didn’t take away one of his
days. Even though he has taken away his threat to separate me from Cole, there
is still the original threat of him fighting for me and I don’t doubt he will
do it if I push him. But he still seems to think that I will let him down. 
Fool.

“All that you just said. Shouldn’t the same apply to you?”
Devon asks.

CK smiles that smile at me and takes my chin in his hand and
says, “Oh no. I am completely, one hundred percent in love with every part of
her. Aefre, Elizabeth, Liv. Every Shift in between and in the future I will
love without fail.” He kisses me lightly and Devon grumbles, “Geez, get a
room.”

“So you are coming home?” I ask him.

“Yes, I will come home, but what about Jess?”

“Fly back and see her on weekends,” I say, dismissing it as
it is of no interest to me now.

“I don’t want to just see her on weekends.”

“Look, Devon, we are only in New York for a couple more
months. You can see her all you like when we get back to our real home.”

“She can’t stay with us in New York?”

“No. Devon. I don’t know what or how much you’ve told her
about me, us. All of us. But I can’t have a human wondering around poking her
nose in. I don’t want to feel like we are all dodging around the issues in case
we say or do something we shouldn’t.”

“Fine. I get that. I haven’t told her much. Just the
basics.”

“Okay, try and keep it that way,” I say sternly.

“Why? You told Cole everything.”

“Yes but I am in love with him and I wanted to turn him and
marry him. Which I did,” I point out and feel CK’s protest at my words as he
crushes my fingers in his own.

“I suppose you have a point,” he grumbles.

“Do you feel any differently about turning her now?” I ask,
afraid of the answer.

“No. I don’t want that. My feelings for you aside, it really
just isn’t what I want. I don’t want to be stuck with someone for eternity
unless I am absolutely sure I can tolerate them for that long,” he says it with
a straight face but I burst out laughing. He has such a way of seeing things.

“I have missed you so much,” I tell him.

“I have missed you too,” he says. “Well, I had better get
back downstairs and let Jess know she’s going back to L.A. alone.” He sighs.
“I’ll leave you two lovebirds to your…whatever it is you do other than fuck
when you are alone together.”

“Bye, baby,” I say to him as he leans forward for a kiss and
he leaves us two lovebirds to our…whatever.

“CK isn’t here,” I say to Sebastian as he walks into the
suite. I smile up at him and rub the back of my neck. “Getting better at that
now.”

He grins back, “That’s sweet. You can recognize me now. We
must be getting closer. What do I feel like to you?” He sits on the sofa next
to me.

“Also more of a fizz than a tingle.”

He chuckles. “I didn’t come here looking for him. I came
looking for you,” he says.

I put down the magazine that I am reading. “Oh? Why is that
then?”

“I have this problem that only you can help me with.”

“And that would be?”

“Your blood is like a drug, Liv. I need more of it. I came
here to feed,” he says bluntly.

“Excuse me? What does that mean? And you can’t just ask me
like that. CK will freak if he finds out and you know that he will.”

“I will deal with our sire. I just want to taste you again.”
He runs his finger down my neck. “You taste so good. Just one little bite,” he
whispers.

I hesitate, wanting to comply, but conscious of everybody’s
feelings over this. I relent partly, and give him my wrist. He grins wickedly
and takes my hand but instead of clamping down he pulls me onto his lap, facing
him.

“Seb,” I say, placing my hands on his chest. “Not like
this.”

“Exactly like this,” he murmurs and drops his fangs. He
sinks them into my neck and I feel a jolt go through me. He puts his hand on
the back of my head and bunches his fist in my hair. He groans softly and I feel
it go through me and my nipples harden in response. Oh fuck, I am getting
turned on by this.

His hands come forward to undo the belt on my fluffy white
robe and I put my hands on his to stop him. “No.”

He releases the bite and ignores me. He runs his hands up my
arms and pushes the robe off my shoulders, leaving me naked on his lap. His
eyes roam hungrily over me and I don’t like the look in his eyes as they meet
mine and hold my gaze. He fumbles to get himself free and again I say, “Seb,
no.” He grips my hips in a vice to stop me from climbing off him and raises me
up. I can feel him against me rock hard. Eyes never leaving mine he pushes me
down onto him. I don’t want to do this but I don’t do anything about it. I
can’t do anything about it. It’s like my body has taken control and my mind is
not my own. His gaze is intent on mine and I close my eyes to get away from it.