Cocky F@#ker (Tangled Desires #3) (15 page)

We’ve talked about so much, lying in bed in the dark, neither of us able to sleep. Him, because he never does for more than a couple hours, me, because I’m making each moment count. He’s brought up telling his family about us being together, about what happened when we were teenagers, about Vegas, getting frustrated when I bury his words by kissing him, but we haven’t talked about the most important things.

I rifle through the drawer, tossing things on the counter, in the sink. A couple things tumble over the side and land on the tiles, the crashes echoing in the small space.

Shit. Shit. Shit.
The stick should still be here. I finally find it, tucked right at the back. My hand is shaking as I pick it up and look at it.

No lines.

Wait. What?

I stare so hard my vision goes blurry. My pulse is thumping in my ears as I land a hip so heavily against the granite countertop I’m probably going to have a bruise. No lines?

I grip the stick tightly and sob. Tommy’s pee-stick Cinderella doesn’t exist. The moment he told me, I knew where the stick came from. After Mace left the night he told me about the pee-stick I’d had a moment where the coincidence seemed too much. I’d checked the drawer, saw the pee-stick. At the time, I hadn’t realized it was a new one, unused.

I can’t believe my sister could do this to me.

It’ll be over when Mace finds out. It’ll be over when I tell him. That’s why I can’t, why I haven’t been able to. But now?

“I swear every time I see you you’re crying in here.” Gaby sticks her head around the door. She’s rarely home, but for some reason her timing has always been impeccable. I’m only surprised she never walked in on me and Mace.

“Did you do what I think you did?” I hold the stick up between us. “Did you send the stick to Tommy?”

“Have you told him?” She shuts the door quietly, all solemn.

“No,” I whisper, trying to keep my voice from rising. “Because it isn’t his.”

“But you said—”

“I said it was Mace Hadley’s.” I toss the unused test in the sink with everything else I pulled out of the drawer.

“Well, I just, I heard Hadley.” She gets all pouty, but I’m too irritated right now to be nice.

“Tom’s gone through hell for months, Gaby, because you couldn’t mind your own business.”

“Well maybe if you’d been clearer, or you know, told Mace, then it wouldn’t be such a big deal.” I can see her roll her eyes in the mirror.

“You should have kept your bright ideas to yourself and let me handle this.”

“And have you?” She raises one eyebrow. “Have you dealt with it?”

“I’m going to.” I drop my gaze to the swirl pattern of the counter top.

“It’s been almost three months, sis. What the hell is going on?” She touches my shoulder, and I feel myself sinking.

Screw Mace Hadley for being right.

“I fucking love him.” I turn to face her, all the anger I was directing at her leeching out of me. “And this is going to change everything because he doesn’t want it.”

Mace

I spot Chelsea the moment she enters the ballroom. It’s Claire and Razer’s engagement party, and I’ve been sitting at the bar, scanning the room. It’s two fold, this vigilant watch I have on the comings and goings of tonight’s celebration.

I’ve been keeping an eye out for Gem, for my family. Keeping them safe.

I’ve been waiting for her.

I’m on my feet, setting down the cut glass tumbler of scotch I’ve been drinking before she notices me. The light from the chandelier overhead glitters on the gold knee length dress she’s wearing, and she smiles that smile that has my heart forgetting its rhythm.

These past few days have been a bit like a dream. Having her in my bed, fucking her, then lying there for hours watching her sleep while I hold her. We’ve always been this whirlwind, this collision of lust, but there are moments of peace now, too. Times where she catches me staring, or she lets me get close to her outside the bedroom that make my chest swell.

I don’t want to be her dirty little secret anymore. I can’t be around her and not want to touch her. The way she hesitates, clearly considering whether to join me or the others makes me think she knows it, too. Then she ducks her head and makes a beeline for Claire.

Tommy and Gem arrive too, and I straighten my tie and pick my way through the guests to the group in the center.

I’ve made a decision. I’m done skirting around all the things that could be wrong, or go wrong with us. I’m all in. And it’s time she knew it. Time she knew I know the secret she’s hiding behind that flimsy gold material. And it’s time everyone else did, too.

But not tonight. This night is about my best friend and my sister. After tonight though, I don’t think anything on this planet could stop me.

Except for Rush.

Claire shrieks and hurls herself through the crowd toward the entrance to the ballroom. My fucking older brother couldn’t have better timing if he tried. Slouched in the doorway to the function room, dressed in Armani and expensive Italian loafers, he adjusts his tie with a grin before scooping Claire up and spinning her around. “Look at you, Little Bit. I do believe you grew some more while I was gone.”

She slaps his arm, trying to glare at him, but she’s unable to hold back her smile. “That’s because you never come home.”

“Well, I’m here now.” Putting her down, he places an arm loosely around her shoulders. “Although you are marrying our brother, so obviously I’ve been lax in my duties as big brother.”

I don’t know whether I want to hug the asshole, or smack him around for never coming home, except for the one time I wish he hadn’t. I know I’m a prick to think like that as I glance at Chelsea, standing a little off to the side as the rest of us move in to greet him. But we were doing fine without him. Better than, but seeing him reminds me of shit I don’t want to remember, of Vegas, of him and Chelsea and what did or didn’t happen.

I slap him on the back, trying to shake off the niggle of doubt, and the irritation that squeezes my insides like a vise when I see him glance at her.

Tommy picks him up, bounces him around, a giant grin sprawled across his face. “Can’t believe you didn’t tell us you were coming, you bastard.”

“Watch your language, Tommy,” Mom says, swooping in as we fall back.

“Hello, Chels.” Rush claps Dad on the back as he steps around him, his focus completely on her. I don’t mean to form fists, but I’m this close to telling him to back off.

It’s been years since I’ve seen him. And the same for her, too, I suspect from the tentative way she lets him take her hand. “Rush.”

“It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?” He bows to press his lips to the back of her hand, and I’ve had about as much as I can take. My jaw is so tight my temples start to throb. I can’t go through this again.
God, I need to get a grip.
This is Claire and Razer’s night, and he’s my brother. It’s just that the woman he’s salivating over is my life. And she’s having my baby.

“Years.” She winces.

“You’re looking awfully pretty tonight, Chels.” He fingers a couple strands of her hair, and her throat tenses for a second.

My feet move involuntarily, my mouth twitching while I choke on the words I want to say.
She’s mine, with me. You don’t get to look at her like that anymore.
Thank fuck my cell rings. A message from one of my contacts about the men after Gem. It’s enough of a distraction that I don’t give in to being a caveman.

“It’s Chelsea. No one calls me Chels anymore.” A flash of resolve hardens her face before she flips her hair and walks away, leaving Rush open mouthed.

The tightness in my chest, in my fists disappears, and I shove my cell back into my pocket. Seeing her dismiss him like that gives me hope I didn’t realize I was lacking until now.

“I guess your magic finally wore off, brother.” I can’t help throwing one cheap shot at him as I stalk toward the bar.

My cell goes off again before I get to my drink, and I scowl at it as I lift it to my ear. McKay, the contact that I gave all Gem’s information to, suspects we’re in for a rough night, with those bastards after her closing in. I give the bar one last long look and head back to find her. At least tomorrow this should be over and I can concentrate on convincing Chelsea it’s time to stop hiding from my family.

I end up dancing with Gem, since it’s the only way to get her away from Tommy without raising suspicion, while I let her know that her enemies are closing in. Then I let her go so she can compose herself in the bathroom while I go back to the bar.

It’s not where I want to be, sitting alone at the bar with a drink in my hand, and the bartender darting glances at me every few minutes.

“It’s good to be home.” Rush slides onto the seat beside me, eyes my glass and winks at the girl behind the bar. “I’ll have the same.”

She blushes as she sets a glass in front of him and pours expensive amber liquid into it. He’s always had this effect on woman. The ability to make them blush and stammer with only a wink. I imagine it works well for him in his line of work, but it makes me bristle. Probably because I’ve seen him turn that charm on Chelsea too many times, and again tonight.

That she put him in his place made my chest swell with pride, but I don’t think I could handle watching him flirt with her all evening and not be able to do anything about it. If he tries anything, I don’t think I’ll be able to keep from setting everyone straight about me and her. The idea of giving him even the slimmest chance to turn her head has me prickling all over.

“Yeah, I didn’t think you were going to make it back.” I scan the room, searching for Chelsea, and keeping an eye on the crowd.

“I couldn’t miss this.” He raises his glass at me. “In fact, I’m going to be sticking around for a couple weeks.”

“Is that so?” I hate that I want him gone, that I can’t just be happy to see him. I don’t say anything else while I try to let go of the tight coil of tension inside me that’s created by the idea of him having time to sneak back in between Chelsea and I. If it wasn’t for her, would Rush and I be constantly on the opposite side of things? We used to be closer when we were younger. I remember how he, Razer, and I would run around setting traps and blowing up bits of wood and rocks.

Then she came along.

So fucking pretty with her bright eyes and luscious mouth. Always smelling like some sweet exotic treasure. Her sweetness rubbed off on us, even as we took that innocence with our feistiness, which only made her more tempting.

And Rush knew. He had to have known what she was doing to me way back then. Twisting me all up inside and bringing me to my knees with one fucking smile. But that didn’t stop him, because he wanted her too. And how could either one of us fight the temptation?

Now, half the time when I think of my brother I want to smash his face in. That’s why I’ve kept my distance for so fucking long. Because of her. Because for some reason we’re both suckers when it comes to Chelsea fucking Taylor.

But right now it’s worse. Because I’m in way over my head. I’d go to war against my brother for her, and I hate that it would be so easy to pick her over my own blood. “The lights get too bright for you?”

He gives a half-shrug and grins. “I could ask you the same. I heard you beat up your best friend.” He swings around and leans back on one elbow. “I mean, I’m not saying he didn’t deserve it, but it’s unlike you to lose control.”

“Well, shit happens.” I study the grain of the wooden bar top, run my finger around the wet ring left by my drink.

“Yeah.” His grin drops a fraction. Enough that it’s obvious he’s tired. “So why did you run home with your tail between your legs?”

“Way to get to the point,” I grumble, my hackles rising. One stupid incident that I’ve beaten myself up over for weeks shouldn’t equate to this line of questioning.

“Everyone’s worried about you. Claire says you’ve been stalking around like a bear with a sore head for weeks.”

“Of course they are.” I scowl at him as I lift my glass to my lips. “And which one of my favorite siblings decided they should call in the cavalry?”

“Actually.” He focuses on his own glass, a softer expression playing on his face, and I don’t need him to tell me.

In fact, I don’t fucking want to hear it at all. I’m standing before he can get the words out.

“Chels’ asked me to come home.”

“Of course she did.” I drain my scotch, thump the glass down on the bar so hard for a second I expect it to break in my hand. “That’s why she gave you the brush off a minute ago.”

“Surely you understand hiding things from our family better than most.”

“That may be true. But trust me, brother, things have changed since she called you, so you don’t need to worry about me, or her. I’ve got it all under control.”

“Sure you do. But I’m going to stick around anyway.”

I think I hear him chuckle as I go in search of Chelsea.

I am done fucking around. I get so close to turning around and telling him that she’s mine, she’s having my baby, but I don’t, because this isn’t the place.

But I am going to find her and we are going to sort this shit about my brother out once and for all. I’m not going to stand aside this time, like I did in Vegas. I’ll tell her I know about the baby, and that I don’t care why she felt she needed to hide it. I half-suspect I brought that on myself the night I told her about Tommy receiving the blasted test.

It simply doesn’t matter.

I fucking love her.

It’s about time she knows it.

And then everyone is going to know it. I’ll announce it from the fucking rooftop if I have to.

Only I don’t get a chance to find her because mom finds me first, babbling about the men who have Gem, and ordering me to go after Tommy.

Chelsea

“Are you okay?” I slip into Mace’s room. The sliver of light from the hallway before I shut the door illuminating enough that I can see him sitting on the end of the bed, staring at his lap where he’s twisting his fingers.

“Don’t know,” he says, quietly. He sounds lost and a million miles away. “It’s not every day you shoot your own brother.”

I turn the light on and lean against the door, while every cell in my body urges me to go to him. To wind myself around him and push the shadows he’s under away. “Tommy thinks it’s funny. He’s going to remind you a lot.”

“Yeah.” He glances up at me and rubs at his shoulder, the one I suspect he must have damaged while on tour. “But it’s not. I could have seriously wounded him.”

“It could have been worse.” I finally give in to the need to go to him. “It’s only a scratch. And what you did tonight saved Gem’s life.”

“Maybe.” He takes my hand when I stop in front of him. “But I thought I had a handle on things. Now, I’m not so sure.”

“It was a unique situation.” I sit beside him, our bodies touching. The heat of him sinking into my skin. “You were protecting your own.”

“That’s not unique,” he says. “That was my job. My team were as much my family as you are. And I’m not much good to either.”

“That’s not true.” I pull his arm around me, resting his hand on my waist. I need to tell him about the other member of his family. The one he doesn’t know about yet because I’ve been too afraid of losing him. But Gem found out tonight.

My nerves, the stress, got the better of me at Claire and Razer’s party, and Gem found me throwing up in the bathroom. She thinks it’s Tommy’s. Why the hell does everyone assume it would be his? So now I have no choice, and I hate that it’s come to this. “There’s something I should tell you.”

He glances at me, an undercurrent of tension in the way he holds his jaw, but his eyes have this disappointed thing going on, and he doesn’t hold my gaze for long, before he goes back to his hands. “I know.”

Oh shit. How long has he known about the baby? Did Gem tell him when they were waiting for the cops tonight after they apprehended the guys after her? I should have told him, should have been the one he heard it from. “I’m sorry,” I say. “I didn’t mean for you to find out…”

He interrupts me. “So you did ask my brother to come?”