Collateral Damage (From the Damage) (11 page)

She stood up and walked toward him, shutting the door to her office. She handed the check back and leaned against the front of her desk. “I’m not supposed to say anything,” she said. “So, until you’re eighteen, we never had this conversation.”

He nodded. “Understood.”

She crossed her arms and hesitated to speak, choosing her words carefully. “That check is from your father.”

“You know where he is?” Ryder asked, coming out of his chair. Realizing, for the first time that he was a few inches taller than Sophia.

“Not so fast,” she said, holding a hand up to stop him. “I meant your
biological
father.”

His gaze cut to meet hers in question, the news sinking in. He fell back into his chair, keeping his eyes on her as she walked around the desk to the filing cabinet.

“When you first came into our custody, we got our hands on your birth certificate.” She pulled Ryder’s file out of the cabinet, laying it on top to open it. “David Burnett isn’t listed as your father.”

That’s why he abandoned me
, Ryder thought with a sick feeling,
because I wasn’t really his son.

“We tracked down the man who was listed and we told him about you,” Sophia said as she leafed through Ryder’s file. “We ran a paternity test to make sure, and the test confirmed that he was your father.”

Ryder listened in shock. “Why didn’t I ever know about this?”

She found the birth certificate and pulled it out, turning to face him again. “First, I just want to say that I think you’re a wonderful young man, Ryder. A real example of triumph over tragedy. Even back then, you were the sweetest kid. And I’m so sorry that all of this has happened to you.”

Why was she talking to him like that? Why did it feel like she was building him up so he wouldn’t fall too far? Was what she was going to say really
that bad
?

“He signed away his parental rights, and you became a ward of the state.”

“Of course he did,” Ryder said, not meaning to sound as disappointed as he felt. But the emotion was so overwhelming it was hard to hide.

“He was married,” she explained. “He and your mom had an affair. I guess he didn’t want to get busted. I don’t know.”

She handed over the document she was holding.

He was surprised to see the relinquish-of-custody form, filled out and notarized. He held the letterhead up against law-office’s address on the envelope. Sure enough, they matched. “So why is he sending me money now?”

She shrugged. “Guilty conscience? Maybe he knows your aging out and wants to give you something to start a life with.”

“But how can he even do that? Is he loaded or something?”

“He works for a company that designs computer software,” she said. “So he’s doing pretty well for himself. And he’s putting you off to a good start too. So, I suggest you find a nice place to live after you age out, and put the rest into a savings account.”

He nodded, handing the document back to her, but not until he’d gotten a good look at the signature.
Keith Miller
. “Thanks, Sophia. You’ve been a lot of help.”

As he left Social Services, he kept repeating that name inside his head, wondering why it sounded so familiar. Had he seen the name somewhere before? Or had he read the birth certificate during the few weeks he was on his own? Heard his parents argue about it, maybe?

***

“I’ve got road tunes. The cooler’s loaded with drinks and snacks. Anything else we need?” Standing by the open door to Kay’s back seat, Alex reached over and took the duffel bag from her hands.

“Just need you to call my house and make sure the calls are forwarded to my cell,” Kay said.

Alex slid Kay’s bag into the backseat, then took out his phone and called Kay’s house like she asked. After the line started ringing, so did her cell phone.

“Great,” she said with a smile as Alex hung up his phone. “Looks like we’re home-free.”

Kay climbed behind the steering wheel and shut herself in the car. Though she was nervous about the confrontation ahead, she excited, too. Excited about the time alone with Alex, excited about the possibility of leaving her father’s house for good. Once Alex slid into the seat and buckled up, the two took off to claim the future she deserved.

***

“You’re kidding me,” Meagan explained after Ryder filled her in. “All this time, no one told you?”

It was Saturday afternoon and they were sitting at a picnic table by the lake, with a takeout bag from Jill’s Grill between them. “I don’t know,” he said, suddenly not craving the burger. He hadn’t slept last night. This crazy, surreal situation was all he could think about.

Meagan’s broken leg was stretched out across the bench as she ate a cheeseburger. “What are you going to do with the money?”

He glanced up from his burger, half-way through a bite. In light of the new information, he’d forgotten all about the check. After he swallowed, he said, “I don’t know…I have half a mind to shove it in his face. I mean, he’s just trying to ease his guilty conscience. I’m not going to help him do that.”

“Maybe he’s trying to say he’s sorry,” Meagan countered, looking at him over the rim of her water bottle.

“For leaving me alone all these years? I’m not sorry, he shouldn’t be either.” He stopped, shaking his head. After taking a drink of his soda, he cleared his throat. “I’m sorry. I’m a little bitter about the whole thing. Let’s talk about you.” He focused his attention on her, giving her a warm smile. “How’d your day go?”

She looked hesitant. “Are you sure? We could talk about your—”

“No, actually. I would much rather talk about you. Anything big?”

“Well, to be honest, my day sucked.” She reached into her purse and pulled something out. When she handed it to him, he realized it was a picture. Of Meagan sleeping.

“That was taken last night,” she said. “I just bought those pajamas for the sleepover. I wore them for the second time last night. It was taped to my mirror this morning.”   

“Seriously?” he asked, although he wasn’t surprised. But he was angry. “Why didn’t you tell me this sooner?”

“Because, you were actually talking to me for a change. And this is just more Seth drama.” She sighed and shook her head, looking embarrassed. “I just want it to go away, but it won’t. And the police refuse to do anything, even though I’ve taken them proof that, over the last six months, Seth has been stalking me and harassing me, and even assaulting me. I mean…it was my fault I didn’t go to the police after the rape, so I can’t expect them to arrest him for that. But what about
everything else
? My
rights
are being violated, here and no one will listen.”

Shaking his head, he set the picture down. Wishing there was something he could do to help, but when the legal system wouldn’t help, what was there
for him to do? Then he remembered Seth’s challenge, and the fighting game, taking place in just a couple hours. “Can I keep this?” he asked. Then he laughed nervously, “Not for creepy reasons or anything.”

She shrugged. “Why would I want it?” then her eyes narrowed on him. “Why would
you
want it?”

He took a drink of his soda to avoid answering, but she still knew.

“You’re going to confront him, aren’t you?”

“Don’t worry about it,” he said, knowing it wouldn’t help.

“Ryder, it’s just going to fuel the fire,” she said. “It’s like Seth gets off on bragging about getting away with everything. If you confront him, he’s just going to love it.”

“You’re sitting here with a broken leg, alright? One he gave you. And the jerk was in your room last night, while you were sleeping, taking
pictures
. Leaving them for you so you would know that you’re powerless against him.” He held eye contact with her, showing her he wasn’t going to support sweeping this under the rug anymore. “Meagan, you’re not powerless, okay? And I don’t know what we have to do to get him to back off, but we’ll figure it out.”

“I know. He’s really starting to scare me. It’s like he just won’t stop,” she said. “Trevor’s having all the locks and security codes changed, but I don’t know how much good it’ll do.”

“Someone’s gotta knock some sense into Seth,” Ryder said. “Maybe that’ll stop him.”

“I don’t want anyone to get hurt here. And the last thing I want is you or Trevor getting arrested for hurting Seth before he gets arrested for hurting me. Okay?”

He understood that. But he didn’t know if he would listen to her or not. Sometimes, to protect somebody, you have to go against their wishes.

She shook her head, resigning the argument. “I know one thing for sure. As soon as this cast comes off, I’m doing whatever it takes to dance again. That’s one thing he’s
never
going to take from me.”

Chapter
8

Kay

Driving Kay’s Jeep, Alex pulled up outside of a large, two-story house. A chain-link fence ran all the way around it, and, in the corner of the yard, a Golden retriever slept lazily under the morning sun.

Kay looked down at the copy of the deed with her mother’s alias on it, double checking the address. “This is the place,” she said, looking nervously over at Alex. Then she looked back toward the driveway. “I don’t see her car
, though.”

“Maybe she’s not here,” he offered.

“I just thought of something,” Kay said, feeling silly for not thinking of it before. “What if she just rents this place out?”

They burst into a fit of laughter.

“Then,” Alex said, trying to suppress a laugh, “We just drove a long way for nothing.”

Kay
chuckled as she pulled down the visor mirror, checking her reflection. Stalling.

As if sensing this, Alex reached over and squeezed her knee. “You can take your time. We can go back to the hotel room and go over the game plan one more time.”

But she shook her head again. “I think we’ve practiced it enough,” she said. “I just want to get this over with.”

He gave her an encouraging smile. “Good luck.”

She pushed open the car door and climbed out, stepping out onto the sidewalk. Dread and anticipation filling her with every step, she walked up to the front door and rang the doorbell.

To her surprise, a little boy answered. Looking to be around five years old, he had blond hair, blue
eyes and pudgy cheeks, and gave her a goofy grin. “Are you one of those mermans?”

Kay just stared in response, as a sickening thought occurred to her. 

An older man, again with blond hair and a light smile, walked up behind the boy, laughing. “I think he means
Mormons
.”

Again, she could only stare at them. Was this man the same one she’d heard over the phone? Who was the boy? Forcing a light laugh, she tried to seem normal and not eaten up with confusion. “No,” she said to him. “I’m just looking for someone.” She turned her attention to the man. “Does… does Melanie live here?”

“She does,” the man said. “But she just headed down to the shop. Are you looking for one of her pieces?”

She shook her head. “No…” Looking down toward the little boy, she added, “Maybe we should talk in private.”

The man narrowed his eyes at her, concerned, then he said to the boy, “Josh, how about you set up that Go Fish game? I’ll be right in.”

The boy scampered off, and the man stepped out, leaving the door open behind him. From the porch, she could see a clean and tidy living room, with a lot of framed pictures.

“Are…are you her boyfriend?”

He chuckled. “No. I’m her husband.”

Kay staggered back a step, a tightening feeling in her chest. How could that be possible? Her parents were married. Sure, they lived apart and were barely on speaking terms, but their marriage license was still intact. “I’m sorry…you’re…
married
to her?”

“Yes,” he answere
d. “Going on five years now.”

A laugh of disbelief and shock escaped her lips, and she raked a hand through her hair
as her mind began to process a thousand different treacheries. “And…and the boy…he’s both of yours? I mean…he’s
hers
?”

“Yes,” he said slowly. “What’s this about?”

“Yeah, I’d really like to know,” Kay muttered. Looking back up at the man, she said, “I’m her daughter.”

Realization dawned on his face as he whispered, “You’re Kaytlin.”

So he knew about her? she thought. Her mom…
talked
about her, while she was here living this entirely separate life with an entirely separate family? The betrayal stung, like a bullet in her heart, searing any love for her mother that might’ve remained.

“Do…do you want to come in?”
He awkwardly motioned to the house, looking nervous and unsure of what to do in this situation. “I can call your mom and…”

But Kay only shook her head in response, covering her mouth to hold back a sob of disappointment and abandonment.

The man looked down at her, an expression of pity in his eyes. “First of all…I just want to apologize. I know the divorce couldn’t have been easy on you—”

“Divorce?” Kay repeated, laughing. And the lies keep piling up, she thought bitterly. Suddenly, her anger exploded. “You know what? You’re right. The past few years haven’t been easy…in fact, they’ve been hell. So next time you talk to
Melanie
, tell her I’m in town. And I know everything.”

Turning, she hurried down the sidewalk and to her car, where Alex was watching with concern.

“What happened?” he asked.

Her hands shook as she slammed the car door shut. “Just drive.”

***

The door to the hotel room slammed open and Kay barged inside, ringing her hands. Alex followed behind her, worried but patient.

Inside the room, Kay’s composure began to unravel. She paced back and forth across the room, trying to sort out a million thoughts.

“What happened?” Alex asked as he shut the door. “You haven’t said a word since we left that house.”

But she didn’t answer him. All she could think about was her mother, the way she’d turned on her,
abandoned
her. Not for another man, but for another kid. Another
family
.

Tears of anger and betrayal stung her eyes but she refused to let them
fall, refused to be weak. Her chest burned every time she tried to breathe. It felt like the air was going into her mouth, but not her lungs, and her heart physically hurt. She grabbed her chest, trying to control it. “I can’t breathe, Alex,” she whispered. “I swear, it feels like I can’t breathe.”

He took her hand, led her to the edge of the bed, where she sat down. “Just try to calm down.”

“Calm down?” she exclaimed. “Calm down? I have the worst mother in the world and you want me to calm down?”

He looked stumped, completely confused. And of course he was, she thought, because she hadn’t been able to voice what’d happened.

“She isn’t having an affair,” Kay whispered. “She’s
married
to him. They have a son together.”

His eyes narrowed, as bewilderment, then pity, swam into his expression. “
What
?”

“Yeah,” she said, her voice trembling. Finally, an angry tear fell. She stood up, walked toward the wall. “She’s married to
both
of them.”

With her hardened gaze fixed on the wall, Kay began to hit it. Swinging punch after punch, alternating between front punches and hooks. Lost in the violent motions, she didn’t even realize she was crying. Just like her father, the wall didn’t budge and she only ended up hurting herself.

“Kay,” Alex said softly, trying to get her attention. But his voice sounded so far away, like it was echoing from another planet.

Making a mangled sound of sobs and grunts, she fought out her frustration. Beating away at the wall, when she wanted to kick both of her parent’s faces in.

“I hate her!” She slammed her foot into the wall and cracked the plaster a little. “This is where she’s always running off to.” Heartbroken tears escaped, streaking her cheeks. She began to punch harder. “To her
other
family. Her
real
family.”

He reached out to touch her, but she moved to get another swing in at the wall.

“All this time, I’ve been keeping this secret. Trying to keep our family together…” Her rage boiling over, she punched as hard and fast as she could, ruthlessly, until her knuckles were a bruising, bloody mess. “But she walked out on us a long time ago.”

Thoughts racing, blood pumping, her anger skyrocketed and she couldn’t hit the wall hard enough to soothe her pain. “Every time he hit me…was because he hated her.”

At that, Alex grabbed her shoulders and spun her to face him. She struggled at first, on reflex, and then out of anger. Though the feeling wasn’t directed at him, she unleashed it on him anyway. She beat at his chest with her fists and struggled against his hold. Patient, kind, he wrapped his arms around her and clutched her tight, letting her fight out the pain. Tears poured down her cheeks and sobs mangled through her throat.

As the wave of emotion passed, she settled down, collapsing into his embrace and allowing herself to cry on his shoulder. Holding him tight, she let the tears flow freely. “She abandoned me…left me to deal with Dad alone,” she sobbed, barely coherent.
“She doesn’t even know how much he hurts me…she doesn’t even care enough to find out!”

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered, pressing his lips against the top of her head. “You deserve better than this.”

***

Gage

***

Gage had been enjoying the Saturday off work and spending time with Lizzie. They’d gone to the park, where she had cooed during a ride in the baby-swing, and pointed at every tree she saw.

Now, he was feeding her and getting ready to put her down for a nap. His imitation of an airplane with a spoon was in mid stride when someone knocked on the door. “Who’s that?” he asked the little girl as he finished giving her that bite. “Probably Aunt Sarah, coming to tell me I need to lighten up. Huh?”

He stood up and crossed the room, looking at Lizzie. “Have you noticed that’s all she ever says to me anymore?”

She laughed and slapped her hands down on the table in response.

“That’s what I told her,” he said. Then he pulled open the door, and had to let go of the handle to keep from slamming it back shut again.

Kendall stood outside, a six-pack in one hand, a cell phone in the other. She was looking down at the phone, sending a text when he pulled open the door. Seeing him, she smiled in that sassy way of hers and leaned a hip against the doorframe.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, stepping back to keep her from brushing up against him.

“Dropping in to say hi.” She looked up at him with an exaggerated pout as she pretended to be wounded. “I couldn’t help but notice you never welcomed me back to town.”

“Welcome back,” he said. “But now’s not the best time…”

She laughed and pushed past him, walking into the apartment. “When is it a good time with you, Gage?”

He sighed and shut the door. “By all means, come on in.”

Momentarily distracted by Lizzie, Kendall gazed at her in admiration for about a split second. “Wow. She’s gotten so big.” She set the beer down on the coffee table, then turned to Gage. “So, I’ve got two things for you. The beer’s one. Want the other?”

“Not really,” he said, but only managed to get half of it out before she walked up to him and slapped him across the face. He brought a hand to his cheek in surprise. “Are you crazy? What was that for?”

The friendliness was gone from her face, replaced with passionate indignation. “Really? I have to hear from a total stranger at a random party that my friend is dead? You couldn’t have just picked up the phone? Or hell, left me a voicemail?”

He stepped back a little, keeping his eyes locked with hers in a hateful look he hoped would make everything clear. “Given everything that happened, you weren’t on my mind very much.”

“Real nice,” she said, backtracking to the coffee table to grab a beer. “But then, you were always such a charmer.”

Reaching out, he grabbed her hand as she raised it to crack open the bottle. “Hey, you’re not going to drink in my house.” He yanked the bottle from her hands and put it back in the carton. “Especially not with my daughter three feet away.”

She crossed her arms and cocked her hip to one side. “That didn’t seem to bother you the night before I left town.”

“Is that why you stopped by? For a trip down memory lane?” He grabbed the beer and shoved it
into her arms. “Well, the road’s closed. So why don’t you just get the hell out of here?”

Something cold flashed in Kendall’s eyes. “You know, I bet Kelly would find it really interesting that you pretended not to know me in front of her. It was a jackass move, but hey, I’m used to that out of you. Is she?”

“What does Kelly have to do with anything?”

“Nothing, according to you. But man, she’s under your spell. Bad.” Laughing, Kendall reached into her purse and pulled out a book. Looking closer, he realized it was the same kind as Daphne had handed out at the first support group meeting. But it looked too worn and used to belong to Kendall. She flipped open to a page. “You should see the stuff she wrote in this little journal. ‘
Gage is always so understanding. He helped me come clean with my mom, and now somehow I hate myself a little less
.
He’s so strong and independent; I wish I could be just like him. I wish he would just let me in.
’ The girl’s got a major case of hero worship.”

Gage tried to stand there, unfazed and indifferent to what she was saying, but part of him wondered if it was true. He doubted it, since Kendall rarely told the truth unless there was something in it for her. Even if that really was Kelly’s journal…it didn’t matter what it said. At least, that’s what he kept telling himself.