Come and Talk to Me (14 page)

“I’m sure they tried to get her to eat but knowing her, she just shooed them away. I talked to two nurses about her. There was nothing they could do after calling me. I just wish they had done that sooner.” He pointed at the room service trays. “She didn’t put much of a dent in it, but I got her to eat what I could. I’m glad you’re here, babe. She needs you. I’m not equipped for this.”

“I’d say you did a hell of a job.”

Troy’s eyes welled up with tears. “He was my best friend, too.” Bri held him tight. Together they cried, mourning the loss of their friend.

They stayed a few days together in the hotel. No one minded sharing the close quarters; in fact, they preferred it. Regina slept between the two of them that second night, like a scared child who had been awoken by a thunderstorm and crawled into her parent’s bed for comfort. Troy and Sabrina both rested an arm on her while she slept.

When Troy came back from the hospital the third day, he was furious.

“They did what?” Regina shouted.

“They said they had no choice. The autopsy revealed all it was going to and they closed the case.”

“How dare they ship his body to Big Lake without my permission!”

“That’s what was on his record when he joined. It had never been changed. They were responsible for his life insurance.”

“Meaning?” Reggie asked.

“It amounts to the funeral and burial paid for. His body goes to the funeral home he chose in his hometown when he joined. They were in touch with Champus about a next of kin list. As soon as you left the hospital with me, they notified his family.”

“They had no right to do that.”

“The hospital said they had no choice. You were deemed unstable and they had to get him out of there.”

“Shit.” Reggie sat down. “I just wasn’t ready to move him. I couldn’t accept…”

“I know, Reggie.” Troy sat next to her. “I didn’t think they’d do it. They said nothing to me.”

She twisted a tissue in her hands. “I can’t do a funeral with his family. You know we’ve never gotten along. I’m sure they’re pissed I haven’t spoken to them yet.” She leaned her head to his shoulder. “It was hard enough to say goodbye to him the first time.”

“You don’t have to, Reg. You’ve said your goodbyes. Come home with us,” Sabrina said. “His family can take care of the funeral.”

“I can’t do that. What would they think when I don’t show up for my own husband’s funeral?”

“Do you care what anyone thinks? Come home for a while. We’ll help you take care of your house in a few weeks, a few months…whenever you’re ready to face it.”

“I have to go.” Reggie stood up and stuffed the few clothes Sabrina had bought for her into a plastic bag.

“Reggie,” Troy said, stopping her. “Don’t go flying outta here crazy. You don’t need to do this.”

“Yes, I do. He’s not going to have a funeral without me there.”

“You just said you couldn’t do that.”

“I don’t want to see his family, but I need to be with him. I need to be able to say goodbye, Troy.”

He could think of a dozen things to say to her to try to talk her out of it, but all he could say was “Okay. We’re taking you though.”

~*~

Reggie finally gathered the courage to call Van’s mother when they reached their Bemidji home. Cold would not describe the conversation. The doctor’s release was the only information they received about what happened; they didn’t understand her lack of communication. She lacked the strength to explain it.

“He’ll be buried in the family plot and have a good Lutheran service.” His mother emphasized Lutheran
.

Van had wanted to be cremated. His mother couldn’t possibly want to go against his wishes. Reggie shook out of both fear and anger at this woman and her stubborn ways. She tried to put some force behind her voice, desperately wanting her to understand. “That’s not what he wanted, Mrs. Kimball. Van had said he…”

“I’m not burning my baby. We’ve had this plot for generations and that’s where he’s going. Service starts at noon tomorrow,” she said, before hanging up.

Reggie was unsure of her plans now. She wasn’t sure she could stay in Minnesota without him; there would be too many memories. Maybe he should be with his family. She couldn’t drag his ashes around while she found home. It would be too hard on her.

The conversation went through her head the entire drive to the funeral. It wasn’t right, but she justified it for three hours.
It’s not him, Reggie; it’s just his body. His heart will always be yours.

A
LTHOUGH
I
T
W
OULD
M
EAN
another three-hour drive after the service, Reggie didn’t want to get a room in Big Lake. Troy would have flown her to the moon if she asked; he didn’t mind doing the driving between towns. They arrived in Big Lake an hour before Van’s service. Reggie asked to be left alone for a while and they understood. She gave them directions to the church as they dropped her off at a small park by a strip mall.

“I need a minute. I promise I’ll see you there.”

Once the car was out of sight, she walked to the mall and went into a hair salon. “Can I help you?” the receptionist asked.

“Do you guys do Locks for Love here?”

“Sure, we can send it off for you. It’s another ten dollars though. Are you cutting off all that gorgeous hair? We only need ten inches.”

“I want it all off please.”

The hairdresser, whose nametag read Lori, complimented Regina’s thick mane while she brushed it out. She insisted that she leave it above her shoulders. “It would be a major adjustment to go too short right away. I’d hate to overrule you, but trust me. If you hate it when I’m done, I’ll go shorter.” The stylist tied a ponytail holder around her hair at her neck to keep it from all falling to the floor in a mess then snipped it off in several swipes and offered it to Reggie.

“Say goodbye to an old friend.”

Lori was too excited about her new creation to take notice to the tears forming in Reggie’s eyes. Reggie feigned a smile when the stylist proudly proclaimed, “Ta-da,” twenty minutes later as she spun her around to face the mirror. It was a cute cut and style. It sat a couple inches above her shoulders and was nicely layered. She asked not to be given bangs; she liked being able to tuck her hair behind her ears. It was nice, but Reggie would have been content if she had done it herself in her best Hollywood fashion, doing an imitation of some crazy lady butchering off her own hair for whatever dramatic purpose. Having paid dearly to get it done must show some kind of sanity and restraint for her actions.
Right?

Throughout the cut, Reggie twisted her long lock around her hand. How Van loved her hair. She wished she could send it with him instead, but she knew it wouldn’t be fair. Two wigs could be made for the children with cancer out of what was cut off. Van would have wanted that. When the stylist reached for it she asked, “Can I take a few strands?”

“Of course.” She removed about a quarter inch round chunk of it. “You have more than enough hair here. I’d say you had enough for two, maybe even three wigs; it’s so thick and long. You’ve made some children very happy.” Again Reggie had to force a smile in return.

“I need to braid it. You want the honors one last time?”

“No thanks. It’s all yours.” She paid her bill, tipped the girl another ten dollars and walked toward the church.

~*~

“Where is she?” Sabrina whispered from the pew. The service was half over and she had yet to see Reggie come in.

“She’ll be here,” Troy whispered back.

They sat quietly, listening to the remainder of the eulogy.

“Donovan is in a far better place now,” the pastor continued. “We should be rejoicing for him. He is…”

“Bullshit.” A voice came from the front doors of the church. Everyone turned around.

Sabrina let out a loud gasp. “Oh, dear God!” Her head fell into Troy’s shoulder.

~*~

“Bullshit,” Reggie said again. “Excuse me if I don’t feel like rejoicing right now.” No one moved as she walked toward the front of the church. She scanned the faces of the crowd. A lot were relatives she’d met only a time or two. There were some friends from Bemidji and Van’s boss. Someone had spread the word; she was glad they would get the chance to say goodbye to him. She couldn’t have broken the news to anyone, still finding it impossible to believe herself. Everyone stared at her as she slowly walked to the front of the church.

After climbing the few steps that brought her to the casket, she stared at the handsome face of her husband. They had done a good job, she thought. He looked like he was merely sleeping. She reached in and placed his wedding ring back on his finger. They had given it to her when she left the hospital with Troy. She was upset that they had taken it off. Next she removed the hair that she had carefully weaved around her fingers, placed it into his hands and squeezed it tight.

“I’ll love you forever,” she whispered as she stroked his cheek and rested her head on his chest. “I’m sorry about the salt shaker.” She hadn’t even noticed Troy was behind her until he touched her shoulder. Spinning around, she threw her arms around his neck and fell into him. Her body suddenly felt like rubber and her knees went weak. Sabrina had gotten to them when Troy bent down and picked Reggie up. He carried her out of the church and no one looked back.

Reggie curled up in the back seat of the car on the long drive to her house. No one spoke for over an hour.

“I have to get back to work, Bri,” Troy finally said.

“We can’t leave her like this.”

“I’m not saying we should. Pack her a bag and bring her home. She has nothing to keep her here.”

“His family is as bad as hers, the poor thing. I swear we’re all she has, babe.”

“Van always said his family was a little too conservative, even for his taste. They never left their town. Everyone knew everyone’s business and no one missed a Sunday sermon. He was glad he joined the Guard and was able to see more of the real world. Reggie was especially a change of pace for him.”

“They really did seem like oil and water in the beginning, didn’t they?” Sabrina said with a laugh.

“I never thought he’d break down that wall she had up.”

They thought she was sleeping, but Reggie listened quietly to every word.

“I never told you but he called me after some fight they had, wanting to know who hit her.”

“Did you tell him?”

“Am I afraid of you two?”

“What did you tell him?”

“I played dumb. That was always her call. If she wanted to leave it buried, I respected that. I always have. I’d still pummel the bastard myself, Bri.”

“I know.” Bri paused. “I’ll book us flights home for tomorrow when we get to her house. You’re right. She needs to come home.”

“So what’s with the hair? She losin’ it?”

“I don’t think so. I think she’s wanted to cut it for a while and only kept it because Van loved it. She put some in his hand.”

“Yeah, I saw that.”

“I suppose in her eyes it belonged to him. Maybe it’s a fresh start for her, too. She’s going to be a long time getting over him.”

I’m never getting over him.
Reggie thought to herself. She finally drifted off to sleep dreaming about him.

~*~

“Ouch! You’re pulling my hair, Van.”

“Sorry, baby,” he said as he moved his arm.

They had been making love, but a shift of position brought an abrupt halt to things. She pulled her hair free, twisted it, then tossed it up over her head. “I should go get it all cut off.”

“Don’t you dare,” he said, pulling her close and sinking his face into her neck with a playful bite. “You know the only thing that is better than your gorgeous long hair against your naked body?”

“What?”

“Your gorgeous long hair against my naked body.”

She laughed. “Some days I do want to chop it off though.”

“I’ll get you a whole litter of kittens if you don’t.”

“But you’d die from sneezing.”

“So put a lock of your hair in my coffin. Don’t cut it, baby. Please?”

“For you, okay.” She nuzzled into his neck. “You going to finish the job?”

“I don’t know. Thinking I hurt you kinda killed the mood.” He kissed her lips. “Wait. I know.” He grinned and kissed down her chest.

“But what about you?”

“It’s not about me tonight.” He kissed past her naval and kept going south.

They snuggled afterward; she was still gently moaning and let out an occasional soft giggle.
Damn, he’s good
. “Promise to do that again sometime and I’ll keep the hair for as long as you live.”

~*~

“I’m not going with you, Bri. I need to stay here for a while and get things sorted out.” Reggie was sitting at the kitchen table with her arms wrapped around her legs, her chin resting on her knees. She hadn’t said anything since they woke up until now. Bri and Troy had been making arrangement to take her home, talking around her like she wasn’t there.

“Hon, you can’t stay here by yourself. I don’t trust you to eat. I know how you get. Come home with us for a while; at least a week or so.”

“I don’t want to go home, Bri. This is my home.”

“This was your home with Van. Now your home is with us again.”

Her eyes welled with tears and she sunk her face into her legs. Troy reached from behind and held her tight. “Come with us, Reggie. Please. I have to get back and I don’t want to leave you here.”

She picked her head up and wiped her eyes. She didn’t think she could possibly cry any more. “You’re not letting Van down by leaving me alone, Troy. I need to stay here.”

“Why? There’s nothing here for you anymore, certainly not his family.”

“This place is all I have left of him. I’ll never have anyone else. I want to stay where he fixed thing up for us. We were supposed to have a life together
here
.”

“How can you say you won’t have anyone else again, Reggie?” Sabrina said. “You’re young and gorgeous. Give it time. You’ll heal, hon.”

“No, I won’t!” she screamed. “He was my one!
The
one! You only get one, dammit!”

“Are you high? Listen to yourself. Out of all the billions of people on the earth, you’re only allowed one? What a crock of shit!” Sabrina wrapped her arms around her. “We don’t need to think about that now, but please, hon, come home with us.”

A knock at the door made everyone jump. Troy answered it. Alex extended his hand and introduced himself and his wife. “Saw you at the funeral, but it didn’t look like a good time to make your acquaintance. How is she?”

“Stubborn, as always. Come on in.”

Kirsten held up a nine-by-thirteen glass-baking dish. “I brought an egg bake. I’ll get it served up.”

“Sounds great,” Troy said. “Coffee should be ready, too.”

Reggie didn’t stand, but she welcomed the hugs of her friends. Sabrina stood up to help. Reggie accepted the coffee and drank some, but just moved the food around on her plate with the fork. Sabrina and Kirsten exchanged glances; they both were watching her.

“We’re trying to get her to come home with us for a while,” Sabrina said to them.

“I’m right here, Bri. Don’t talk around me like I’m not here again.”

“Hon, when did I…” Sabrina quit talking. She either remembered the time with the thorn or decided not to argue. Reggie didn’t care which.

“I said I’m not going. I need to stay until everything is settled.”

“Until what is settled, Reggie?” Troy asked.

“They killed him, Troy. I’m not just sitting here and taking it. I’m frying every ass I can until I get some answers.” She gave up playing with the food and shoved the plate forward.

Troy knelt at her side. “Don’t you think I did everything I could, Reg? It’s done. They’re not claiming any responsibility. It’s over.”

“I can’t accept that and I won’t.”

Troy stood up, frustrated, and Alex took his place. “I know you don’t want to hear this now, but Van did have a life insurance policy through work. It was part of the benefits. In a few weeks, I’ll be bringing you a rather sizeable check, Reggie.”

“You’re right. I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want money, I want my husband back.”

Troy yelled at her. “Well, you’re not going to get him, Reggie. He’s gone, dammit.”

Reggie stood. “I’d like you all to leave me alone now. Thanks for breakfast, Kirsten.” She went to her room and closed the door.

~*~

The four of them talked at the table for a long time. Troy and Sabrina had to get back; there was no way around it. As much as they wanted Reggie to go with them, they couldn’t force her.

“We’ll watch after her,” Kirsten said, placing her hand on Sabrina’s. “I promise we’ll take good care of her. I know we haven’t known them for that long, but I do love her like a sister.”

“Thanks, Kirsten. That’ll help a lot. I can’t stand seeing her like this another day. I know she’ll be in good hands with you.” The two gave up the fight for tears and shared a hug.

“You a cigar man, Troy?” Alex asked as he stood up.

“I’ve been known to have one here and there.” The men walked out back, leaving the women to gather themselves.

“He’ll really be missed at the office,” Alex said once they had gotten their cigars lit.

“He’ll be missed, period.”

“True enough. We will do anything we can. I’ll keep in touch and if things get bad at all, I’ll call you.”

“I appreciate it.” Troy let out a heavy sigh. “I wish her parents were more help.”

“We have often thought about how odd that was. I had a friend like that in school. The son was referred to as the ‘Golden Penis’ and could do no wrong. You’d think his sister hardly existed. You guys have kids?”

“We’re working on it.”

“That is the fun part,” Alex said with a nod. “So are we.”

“The money…she’ll be okay?”

“She’ll be okay.”

“That makes me feel better anyway.” Troy ground out his cigar. “I need to go talk to her and we need to head out. I’m going to have to trust the second thing in the world I love most to you.”

“We’ll take care of her. You have my word.”

Troy knocked first then opened the bedroom door without waiting to hear a response. He was sure it would have been ‘go away’ anyway. As luck had it, the bedroom door didn’t have a lock. He sat next to Reggie in the picture window seat. She was staring out into the yard.

“You know I love you, Reggie. You scare me when I think you’re about to lose it and get all emotional on me. How is it said in those damn cat pictures you and Bri love so much? ‘Get all
emo
on me’?” She leaned into his chest and he held her. “I’m sorry, princess, but you have to snap out of it.”