Confessions Of A Vampire (13 page)

I suddenly and inexplicably felt compelled to destroy the girl that had brought that over him. I couldn't explain it but I wanted to protect him. His smile filled me with a warmth that bespoke of love and devotion. And yet I didn't know his name.

But I planned to remedy that sooner rather than later. I was patient and waited until he was alone before I stepped up to the bar and took the empty seat next to him. I slid the photo across the bar to him and turned to face him, the questions at the ready.

Picking it up, he looked me up and down and finally spoke.

“
Why do you have a picture of my dad?”

I stared at him
blankly for what I’m sure was only a few seconds but felt like a few lifetimes
. “I was hoping you could tell me who he is and maybe why I have this picture.”

“
He’s
my father. As for why you have it, I'd like to know that
,
too.” He sniffed me, which I found very odd but I remained still until he was done. “You're not demon. At least not fully.”

“
No, I'm a vampire. Why would you assume I'm a demon?”
The question raced through my mind. Could he be a demon?

The young man tapped his fingers on the bar and stared at me as if I had suddenly sprouted wings or grown a hideous mole on my nose like the Wicked Witch in most fairy tales. I stayed
put
in my seat
and waited for him to speak
.

“
My father is a very po
werful demon but he's not in this
realm right now. If you're looking to hurt him, you've missed the opportunity.”

I scratched my head, frowning even more now. How was I supposed to get answers when the only one I even had a tiny hint of knowing wasn't in this realm. Not that I knew what the hell that meant, but I didn't want him to know I had no clue.

“
I'm not here to hurt him,” I assured him. “I'm just trying to find out how I know him and hoping maybe he can tell me why I had his picture in my wallet. Can you at least tell me his name?”

“
Sure, it can't really hurt anything I guess. Unless of course you are try
ing to get your claws into him in which case I should warn you that m
y mother would tear a little thing like you from limb to limb.”

The frown appeared before I could stop it and my mood was darkened considerably when he spoke of his mother. Somewhere, deep in my cold undead heart I knew that this man in the picture was special to me. I covered my emotions hurriedly and let my eyes widen.

“
I don't think your mother has anything to worry about if he loves her. I'm just trying to find out who he is and if he can tell me anything about myself.”

His brow raised and those blue eyes looked as if they saw into my soul as he examined my face. “Amnesia? That's not very original.”

“
Original or not, it's truth. I woke up in a strange hotel room with no memories of anything. The only
thing
I could find was an ID with the name Sunshine on it and this picture.”

It was his turn to drop his jaw and let his eyes widen. I saw the pain blossom in his eyes before he concealed it. His shoulders hunched and his voice lowered and I could see the little boy inside crying to be let out.

“
What did you say your name was?” he asked with a shaking voice that betrayed his outward confidence.

Just to prove to him that I was
n’t
lying
,
I dug around in the black messenger back that served as my purse and withdrew the pink wallet. Opening it
so that the ID was visible
, I slid it across the mahogany bar to him and let him read the name that was printed on the card.

“
Sunshine Spencer,” I replied.

The emotions that crossed
his face in rapid succession were
almost enough to make me dizzy and I was more than taken aback when he threw his arms around me and cried. I nervously patted his back as the thought that I should be more motherly to him washed over me.

I couldn't quite understand why I wanted to make sure he was okay, but I did. I felt as if I needed to protect him, but from what? Was I a threat to him? Was he a threat to me? And why the hell was he hugging me?

All of these things ran through my mind as the embrace continued. I could feel his chest heaving and deduced that he was crying. My hand instinctively smoothed his long dark hair and I tried to soothe him with soft words of comfort.

But I sure the hell didn't have a clue what was going on and I wanted to move this along. I pulled back from him slowly, looking at his face, shocked by the sadness I found there.

“
Are you okay?” I asked sheepishly.

“
You really don't know who I am?” His voice was so full of emotion that I became uncomfortable almost immediately.

I shook my head in response. “No, am I supposed to?”

His sigh was deep and prolonged. He stood in front of me just staring for a while before he finally spoke again. “Mom, it's me, Malachi.”

Blinking was becoming a habit lately with all the stuff I'd been through in the last few days and I did it again when he called me Mom. “I think you've mistaken me for someone else. I don't think I have children. I mean, I sort of feel like I'd probably kill them and eat them if I ever did attempt to have them.”

I was rambling, but I had good reason, I thought. His laugh was quiet and
it
warmed me. If I'd had a son, I hoped he would be like this young man in front of me. But I was pretty damn sure I didn't. Part of me wanted to insist he was insane and the other wanted to be his mother. I had an overwhelming desire to ease his pain and lie. What I didn't know was that
he wasn’t crazy,
I was his mom.

He asked me to please just give him a chance to explain and even
though
I was hesitant, I couldn't bear to see him upset again so I agreed to go back to his house and listen to what he had to say.

The drive was short and soon I was sitting in a big overstuffed chair with a blue checkered pattern. A glass of heated blood was placed next to
-
me by a thin woman in a servant
’s
dress
and I
ignored
it,
starting
to fidget, anxious to get this over with so I could get back to the task at hand.

Malachi paced the room taking long strides. Tapping my nails on the arm of the chair I let my irritation show and he soon began to speak.

He talked of how his mother had gone missing not long after he'd returned from Hell. It had been his belief that she'd gone in search of his dad. But as the days went by without a word from her, he'd grown worried. Snapping back and forth to Hell in search of her, he was growing more and more concerned when no one knew anything about if she'd even been there.

I interrupted him to suggest that maybe she'd found his father and they were together but the look on his face told me that he knew this wasn't the case.

He went on to say that he'd been unable to feel his mother through their bond for several weeks now and that many had told him that she could possibly be gone for good. He'd been hearing rumors that she'd gotten into a fight with a demon and had not survived. He said that even though his friends and those he considered family had advised him to accept the possibility that she wouldn't return, he'd not given up hope. He knew that his mother wouldn't just abandon him, he explained.

I could see that he was pinning that hope on me being his mom, but I was afraid that I'd be disappointing him. Even if it were plausible, how could I be someone's mother and not know it? Wouldn't I have remembered giving birth and raising a child, I asked?

He merely laughed at that. He explained how he'd grown faster than most children. In the human world he was only around eight months old.

I raised both brows this time and leveled my gaze on him. How the hell was I supposed to believe that this man standing before me was a child of only eight months in age? It was impossible to believe
and I seriously questioned his sanity
.

Time moves differently in Hell
he went on to tell me a
nd I shot back with a smart remark
that he overlooked
. But he was so serious that I was starting to think he was telling me the truth.

“
If I'm your mother, why can't I remember you?” I asked.

“
I don't know, maybe Lucifer erased your memory. But that doesn't explain the body. Don't you feel odd looking like that
,
Mom?”

It was weird to hear someone call me mom and I didn't know how to respond to it. Nothing made sense in this world and I wasn't so sure it ever would again.

When I didn't answer him he pressed on. “Mom, come with me. I think I might know something that will trigger your memory.”

I reluctantly took his hand and held tightly to it when he snapped us out. Reappearing in front of the cottage, I stepped away from him and put my hand on the red door. Closing my eyes, I felt the tears that fell and it all came rushing back to me.

I saw Severus' smile as we were pronounced husband and wife. I saw his tears when Malachi was born. I felt his heart beating against my cheek as we slept, wrapped in each
other’s
arms. It was all so clear.

And it was all too much.

I crumpled to the stones that made up the front sidewalk and sobbed. As my son wrapped his arms around me I tried to explain why I was so upset. I told him
everything as it came rushing back. I explained
all that had happened in Hell. How I
'd searched and searched for his father
but with the bond closed I could no longer feel him. I wanted him to know that I hadn't given up. I wanted him to understand that his father didn't want to be found.

I could see the pain etched on his face as it dawned on him that Severus had willingly left us both. Gathering him in to my arms, I saw the little boy that had grown up too fast
,
break. His tears mingled with mine and I vowed then and there to never let him down. He would always know that he was loved and I would figure out a way to make his father realize what he'd lost.

Aaron cleared his throat and frowned when I looked up. “I don't mean to interrupt, Mrs. Severus, but obviously you forgave him.”

“I did, eventually. Things were different when Severus returned. I was different.”

“How so?”

I thought about it before answering, trying to find the right words to explain the changes I'd gone through. “I was quieter.” Shaking my head I wondered if that even made sense to someone who hadn't known me before.

“I wasn't so keen on fighting over every little injustice,” I continued. “I really began to just not care what anyone thought about me or my choices. I enjoyed being alone more. I was awkward and I favored things the old me would never have given a second glance. The old Sun was all about fashion and what the world thought of her. But now, I just wanted to be happy. Nothing else really mattered. Before I'd focused on making sure everyone knew who I was and now, I was perfectly happy being anonymous.
I had a lot to figure out in this new existence. I had new powers I needed to learn to control and I had to figure out how to be who and what I was.
”

“You weren’t still vampire?” His eyes searched mine, hoping the question wouldn’t get him killed.

I smiled reassuringly and explained. “I was, but I wasn’t. When I’d been returned to this realm Lucifer had gifted me with demonic powers. I can’t tell you what he was thinking when he did it, but if I had to guess, I’d say he thought it would help protect me.”