Conflicted Love (Needle's Kiss)
Read Conflicted Love (Needle's Kiss) Online
Authors: Lola Stark
| Conflicted Love (Needle's Kiss) |
| Stark, Lola |
| (2013) |
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Lola Stark.
Copyright © 2013 Lola Stark
.
Conflicted Love is a work of fiction. All names, characters, places and events portrayed in this book either are from the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, establishments, events, or location is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
First and most importantly my babies, for being what you have been and now are. It’s been a long hard road and it may never be smooth or without stepping stones, but it’s ours all the same.
So many people I need to thank this time around, some of who I won’t ever be able to thank properly.
Becky
, my editor, again and again, I’m forever in your debt for being patient and stretchy with me…keep that whip handy.
Justine, Vanessa, Tamara, Holly, Kristine
and all the wonderful girls who read my first drafts and notes, you girls kept this one flowing with your demands and pom poms.
Bella, Bec, Sali & Belle
, you all helped me through some sticky spots and put up with my whingeing. A few of you girls were there from the very beginning, and I owe you a million thank yous for that and many other things. You’ve each taught me some invaluable lessons that I will carry with me for as long as I’m able to keep on keeping on.
Tara
, for cussing at me and kicking my ass when I doubted my funny.
C.c,
for taking such a great interest in my pants; life’d be boring without you.
Sissy
, for being a sweet voice and smiling face. For sharing a world of care and consideration with me, and not getting cranky when I put my mummy shoes on.
Pebbles,
I’m unsure you’ll ever understand just how much you’ve held me together and built me up to be what I one day hope to become. Words can’t express how much gratitude I have for the person you are and the absolute honor that it is to be in your world. Tighten the screws on the rocking chairs and gas up the oxygen tanks; these nightingales have tales to tell.
My
Kiss it teamies
. You ladies go above and beyond on a daily basis spreading the word and dragging new readers into our little cave. Each and every one of you are badass babes. The handful of girls who helped me stumble along the way, you know who you are, and I can’t thank you enough.
Bloggers far and wide, without your awesome sauce pimping skills and love for reading, I wouldn’t be where I am today. If you have shared a link or tweeted a teaser, clicked a cover or bragged about a book, you are a rock star.
Cris
, you are my own personal cheerleader and I love you to the moon, lady.
My readers, Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine my stories would become what they are. They have done so because you shared, one-clicked, read, loved and reviewed. You have changed one family’s hopes and dreams with the simple click of a button. I’ll forever be indebted to you all.
There you go; my eyes leaked. Happy? Great. Turn the page and get reading then…
This one is dedicated to a few people. As always, my little man angel, you will forever hold my words, my soul and my heart.
The people who held me together when my wings were broken. I’m still learning to fly, but my dreams are within reach thanks to you.
The people who broke me down, a special thanks goes out to you. You helped me to brush myself off and stand taller than I did before; I’m a stronger person for it.
Trip
“Scotch on the rocks,” I told the bartender before turning back to the party. Doing a quick sweep of the room, I took in all the crap hanging from the ceiling, streamers, paper bells and bird-shaped shit. The confetti and champagne glasses were strewn across every surface. It looked like cupid had walked in and puked on the place. The lovey-dovey shit was for the birds.
My eyes fell on Mace and Scarlett holding each other on the dance floor. Scarlett looking up at Mace like he’d hung the stars and moon. Mace looking down at her like she was God’s gift made just for him. The way they were with each other made me wanna poke my eyeballs out with a fork. Don’t get me wrong, I was happy for them. There weren’t two people I knew who deserved to be as happy as those two were, but the thought of being with one person for the rest of my life made me nauseous and claustrophobic.
Turning back to the bar, I picked up my glass and downed it in one hit. I’d need a good bit of booze to get me through the night, to deal with all the sweet-cutesy crap.
I scanned the room, again my gaze landing on Teeny sitting quietly on her own in a corner, smiling sadly at the happily engaged couple. As somber as she looked, she was still a knock out, and she still wasn’t speaking to me. Not nicely anyway. One night of stupid, drunken decisions and I’d royally screwed up years of carefully constructed friendship.
I was an asshole, but I’d warned her I was. In all fairness, I’d been upfront about my one night rule before I took advantage of a liquor-fueled situation. Still, I felt like I’d screwed shit up. Teen looked at me like she wanted to do bodily harm; gone was her usual happy-go-lucky sweet smile.
Mace and Scar broke away from their lip lock as Teeny stood up and made her way in my direction toward the bar. My eyes instantly dropped to her swelling cleavage and rounded hips. I’d never wanted to bang a chick more than once in my life; it was confusing. On one hand, I figured it was because she was in my life so much. I mean, of course, I would want more; she was without a doubt the best lay I’d had, not to mention she was a great girl. On the other hand, perhaps I was just turning into a pussy.
Mace’s voice behind me drew me out of my thoughts “You gonna stare all night or do something about it?” he asked as he clapped me on the shoulder, leaned over the bar and ordered a beer.
My eyes still trained to Teeny’s short green dress. The shoes she was wearing made her legs look unbelievably long. Shrugging my shoulders was the only answer I had for Mace. I couldn’t decide what I wanted to do about the whole cockeyed situation.
“You look really happy. You’re one damn lucky bastard that woman said yes to your stupid ass,” I told him with a smile. “Though I still don’t understand why you’d wanna be all wifed-up.”
“Happy doesn’t even scratch the surface; Scar’s everything I’ll ever need. You’ll get it one day, little brother.” His face went from the soft expression he held when talking about Scar to a small smile. “Probably the day you can put your dick away for five minutes and look at what’s in front of you,” he answered looking toward an approaching Teeny.
“Don’t you fuckin’ start too; you sound like Ma. Teeny can’t stand me. Besides, I like my dick outta my pants; it finds all kinds of fun shit to do.”
“Who said I was talking about Teeny?” Mace smirked, adjusted his arm in his sling and took a step off to the side leaning against the bar facing the party. No doubt looking for Scar— those two were practically attached at the hip.
I ordered another scotch and a vodka tonic, and pushed it in front of Teen as she stepped up to the bar. She looked down at it and sniffed. A look of disgust crossed her pretty face as she pushed the glass aside. “Can I have a ginger ale please?” she asked the bartender.
Sick of her testy attitude, I called her on it. “What the fuck did I do to you?”
She turned toward me, her face hardening and sneered, “You’ve done enough!”
“Oh, Princess, I haven’t even started on what I want to do to you,” I told her, the honest answer leaving my mouth before my brain could filter it. Her face crumpled and she turned and raced toward the restrooms.
Fuck this shit.
I was gonna find out what her problem was with me if it killed me. I downed the last of my drink and pushed off from the bar. “Hold up, bud, I’ll walk with you. Scar’s takin’ too long.”
With a nod, we both made our way across the busy room avoiding grabby aunties as we went.
The moment I stepped around the corner into the long walkway, I came to an abrupt halt. A mixture of emotions hit me all at once; jealousy, anger, protectiveness and something that made my chest tight.
Scar’s voice drifted to my ears, “The stress isn’t good for the baby, sweetie. You need to tell him.”
Teeny stood there, her back to us, Scarlett holding the tops of her arms. The second Scar lifted her gaze, her eyes flicked around and a whispered, “Oh shit!” escaped her lips.
Teeny spun around with an audible gasp, tears marking her face. Her hand went to her stomach along with my gaze.
WHAT THE FUCK!
I hesitated to move closer; annoyed she hadn’t felt like she could tell me. I mean, she wasn’t seeing anyone but the dude who knocked her up; I’d already decide that he’d better step up and help her, or I’d beat the crap outta him. A shadow of anger at the thought of her being in somebody else’s bed, having somebody else’s hands on her body, those lips around somebody else’s—I shook my head to clear my shitty and confusing train of thought.
I took a few big strides putting myself in front of her small frame and asked, “Whose is it?”
Teeny’s body went stiff, her face void of all emotion. Her hand pressed tighter to her stomach. She turned to walk away, but I reached out and gripped her free hand stopping her escape.
“Whose kid is it?” I asked again as Mace’s hand connected with the back of my head. “What the hell, dude?”
“Dumbass!” he muttered taking a step toward Scar and Teen. His insult rolled off my back; I didn’t care if I was being an ass. I wanted to make sure Teeny’s guy was gonna take care of her.
“Fuck you!” she whispered, not looking at me.
“I never pegged you for stupid, Trip.” This from Scar.
“Me stupid? Why? Wait—” My head was spinning like I’d drunk an entire bottle of tequila. The air I was gulping wasn’t getting to my lungs. “Do you mean…?”
My hand shot out reaching for the wall to steady myself. The room spun out of control as the situation started seeping in. My heart pounded in my chest.
“Not possible,” I breathed. A million thoughts ran through my head as my eyes slowly moved up to meet Teeny’s, unshed tears glistening in her eyes, her chest heaving.
Scarlett’s words bounced around in my head. Baby. Teeny was pregnant. Pregnant with a baby, a baby that may be mine. A baby that’s mine?
How the fuck is this happening?
I looked at her hand pressed tightly to her stomach, her very flat stomach where…no. Just no.
“You sure?” I asked her quietly, my eyes still fixated on her hand. Deafening silence filled the air and I looked back up to her face to see her tough-girl mask firmly in place.
“No, Trip. No I’m not sure at all. I haven’t had needles jammed into my arms, pissed on sticks and spent most of my days for the last few weeks throwing up for shits and giggles,” she snapped at me.
Fuck! Fuck! Fuck
!
“I can’t—I mean, I don’t know what to say,” I told her trying to sort through the conflicting emotions.
I’m too young to be a parent; I wouldn’t even know what to do. Surely I’d do more damage than good. I mean is she sure it’s even mine? I never forgot protection, never, not once had I forgotten including that night.
I realized right away I severely screwed up in more ways than one when Teeny opened her mouth and icily said, “You don’t have to say or do a damn thing. It’s not your problem.” Barging past me, Teeny took off toward the front door without looking back. Scar kissed Mace and scooted past us with a pat to my shoulder on the way. I slumped against the wall and brought my hands up to run through my hair as Mace stepped up leaning against the wall beside me.
“Did somebody forget to give you the ‘wrap it before you whack it’ talk? This is…this is big. What’re you thinking?” Mace asked.
“I don’t have a fucking clue what to think right now. I know I suited up. I never skip that step; it’s ingrained, but Teen isn’t a slut. She never has been.”
“Leaves only one conclusion. Congrats, dude. You’re about to be a dad.”
“Shit,” I rasped sliding down the wall. I landed on my ass as my head started spinning again.
A dad.
