Conflicted (Secrets and Lies) (35 page)

"Ethan, stop," I whispered.

"I'd rather not," he said, sweeping his lips back to mine.

"Stop."

I bit down on his lip hoping he would get the hint. A low hum rumbled from his chest. Not the reaction I had been going for. I ran my hand down to his peck and gave him a titty twister. Ethan flew back in an instant with a scowl on his face as he massaged his chest.

"Fuck. What the did you do that for?"

"You left me no choice. You obviously weren't listening to me when I said to stop," I remarked, batting my eyelashes.

"So you felt the need to assault my poor nipple."

"It got you to stop didn't it?"

"Apparently, I'm not the only one that can make an effective point," he muttered.

Ethan stepped forward to close the distance but I held up my hands. I marched over to his desk and tossed my purse in a chair. I faced him and leaned against the desk.

"I don't want you to do that again. The last thing I need is for someone to find out that I'm screwing the boss."

He started walking towards the other side of his desk and sat down. I did the same with the remaining open chair. Ethan narrowed his eyes at me and I returned the same determined look.

He huffed. "You kissed me back Mia."

"We need ground rules Ethan. I thought you said you conducted yourself professionally in your work. Because what played out there is about as far as you can get from it," I snapped, gesturing to the door behind us.

I was beginning to become irritated with his lack of understanding on such an obvious topic. He shook his head before arching an eyebrow.

"Fine, let's talk rules. Clearly, kissing is off the table. Am I allowed to touch you at all?"

I shook my head. "Touching in isn't a good idea for us when we're here. It has the potential of getting out of control."

Ethan smirked. "You've sucked all the entertainment out of my work day. I was having fun touching you last week."

I rolled my eyes. "It was your cockamamie idea to have me work with you. Consider this your plan blowing up in your face. I'm not going to be intimate with you while we're within this building. You're going to have to deal with talking to me all day."

"I can live with that. Occasionally, insightful things pass through those terse lips of yours."

I beamed. "Every now and then I do say something useful."

Ethan batted his eyelashes. "Are you sure you don't want to reconsider touching? I'll keep it innocent."

I scoffed. "No, I don't believe for a second that you will restrain yourself."

"What's so wrong with the idea?"

"It's wrong in so many ways. The answer remains no. What's on the agenda for today?"

My brain retained an ounce of control and it pushed for me to get into a serious mode with him. I had to do something to rid the rising ache. My body didn't give a rat's ass at what my mouth was spewing. If it were in control, I'd be across his desk screaming his name.

"You're kind of on the crabby side this morning. Have you had any coffee yet?"

"No, I haven't had any coffee this morning," I said softly.

Ethan grinned and pointed to the Caribou coffee cup at the edge of his desk. I smiled shyly while retrieving it. His eyes filled with happiness as I took a long drink.

"Thank you. That was sweet of you."

"You're welcome. How was the rest of your night?"

"It was good. I caught up with Bri."

"Talk about anything interesting?"

"Nope, just some guy. How was the rest of your night?"

"Anyone I know?"

Ethan ran his fingers along his desk. I softened catching him in this vulnerable state. He fidgeted when he was nervous or agitated. It was cute to watch. He captured my gaze with a deep passion behind his eyes. I set my coffee down. It wasn't needed with the warmth catapulting in every direction throughout me. I blinked to regain my wits.

"Maybe. You didn't answer my question."

His eyes cast away from mine as he set into a mood that was close to moping. "My night was uneventful compared to the rest of my weekend."

"Sounds like you had a pretty good weekend."

"It was one of the best weekends I've ever had and I was sorry it ended," he professed.

Ethan brought his focus back to me again with a sweltering gaze upon his face. He ran his eyes up and down my body. There was so much desire in his eyes. It made me squeeze my legs together in an attempt to contain the very abrupt flash of heat that coursed through them.

"Me too," I stammered.

"How'd you sleep last night?"

"I slept pretty decently after popping in my headphones," I admitted with a shy smile.

His face stretched into a crooked grin. "Listen to anything good to help you fall asleep?"

"Yes, I had this new playlist that made sleeping easier than it has been in a long time."

"I'm surprised you aren't chewing me out for touching your phone. You're relatively mellow right now. I'm not sure that's a good thing or a bad thing."

"It's a good thing," I reassured.

Ethan shook his head. "You flip out when I move your car without telling you but you're fine with me putting a playlist on your phone. You never cease to amaze me, Mia."

I smirked. "I need to keep you on your toes."

"Did you like the songs?"

He was anxious about how I reacted to the very intimate and thoughtful songs that he selected for me. I opened my mouth but the phone rang. Ethan cursed picking up the receiver.

"Ethan," he snapped.

I watched with concern as he exhaled to calm himself. His intimidating side was starting to rear its head. He diverted his eyes from me so I busied myself with drinking my coffee.

"No, I don't think it will be ready by then," he replied curtly.

Ethan banged his hands down on the desk at the next part of the conversation. My eyes drifted around his office. Being in his direct line of vision didn't seem to be in my best interest. It occurred to me that I hadn't really paid attention to what was in his office. I was always too busy drooling over him.

His large L-shaped teak desk was directly across from the threshold of the door. Personally, I was a fan of the desk because of the modern flare to it. If you sat across from him, there was plenty of leg space. What was even better was that one side of it rounded off with the no back to it so that you could slide right in as if it was your own desk. I sat in that spot now and suspected it was going to my area of his desk indefinitely.

At least the fine leather chair is cozy. It still irks me that he wants me to work with him. I just feel like there is something he isn't telling me. Shut it Mia! You're intuition these days hasn't been in it's finest form. Let it go!

On each side of the door, there were black leather couches with artwork on the wall open wall above. It was the only open wall in his office because the other three contained built-in bookshelves from floor to ceiling with miles of books upon them. Much like his apartment, there was a very distant feel to his office. There was nothing personal to him and no indications that he was the owner's son. I glanced back to the door to see if maybe there was something that I might have missed on the wall but it was more of the same. The artwork was amazing. In the quick glance that I took, it appeared to be crosses of Irish and Greek pieces. I zoned in even further to get a better idea but snapped out of my daze when Ethan slammed his hands down on his desk once again. It was so loud that it made me jump out of my seat this time.

"Fine, I'll figure out how to get it ready," Ethan shouted.

I flinched watching his rising temper. The vein in his forehead was protruding from the skin as well as several others in his neck. Ethan slammed down the receiver. His hands balled into fists. I focused on breathing without making a sound. It scared me to look at him with how angry he was right now. I halted looking around his office and remained perfectly still. The lines in my hand became the most interesting things in the room.

"We should get to work."

"Sure. What do you need me to do?"

Ethan stared at me with a pain in his eyes that I couldn't place. Everything inside of me wanted to settle myself in his lap to soothe him but I held back. We became enthralled with each other's eyes. It almost had me drifting in his direction to kiss away his frustrations. I broke our heated connection by pointing at his computer screen.

This is going to be one hell of a long day.

"I'm working on a proposal that needs to be closed soon. We'll work to put together the research from other departments into a portfolio. It will represent what our company will do should they undertake us as investors," he said flatly.

"I'll do whatever you need me to do Ethan."

He rolled his chair over to the other side of the desk and rummaged in one of the drawers. He swung around with a laptop. I took it and hit the power button. I finished the rest of my coffee and looked for a trashcan. Ethan motioned for the cup. Our fingers grazed in the exchange and we inhaled sharply.

This is going to be torture.

I retracted my hand to cease the firestorm coursing through my body. We knew what direction it would lead in if we let our fingers linger. This was why I made no contact a rule. Ethan sat with his eyes closed muttering under his breath.

Okay, I guess that affected him a little more than I thought.

I gave him space and looked at the computer. I gasped once the desktop emerged and the picture behind it popped out. It was his spot on the lake. The detail of the city appeared in tiny blocks but the picture was the lake on a calm day with light ripples running endlessly. I gazed over to him. His face warmed to a bright smile and he flashed those delectable dimples. He knew what reaction he was going to get. I swore the man lived for getting a rise out of me.

"There's a file on the Q drive that I want you to look at to help me," Ethan instructed.

I opened the only file on that drive. I examined the contents and dove into editing the proposal. We worked without a word for hours. I wanted this day to be over. I wasn't any closer to telling Harrison that I couldn't do this any longer. The last thing I wanted to do was disappoint Ethan by not meeting his expectations on what he wanted from me to close this deal. The internal conflict rose to the surface making it difficult to focus. I was so deep in thought that the knock on his door made me jump.

Stupid caffeine.

Ethan chuckled as he walked to the door. The busty blonde from the receptionist desk strode in with a take-out bag of food. She paused when she noticed me but moved past that thought and openly flirted with him. I literally bit my tongue to refrain from calling her out on it. Ethan thought nothing of it as he took the food and dismissed her. I turned to my computer silently seething. In the past, I'd never been jealous around other woman. With him, I suspected that it would become a very familiar emotion for me.

"You're cute when you're jealous," he remarked.

Ethan slid a take-out container next to me. I refrained from looking at him. He chuckled as he sat down on his side of the desk and opened his own box of food. My container had eggs and toast with slices of bacon. I glanced at him in awe.

"I thought it would be a nice gesture since we never got to have breakfast with each other this weekend. It was also the only food I knew you would eat other than Chinese."

"This looks great. It's no secret that we need to learn more about each other."

Ethan grimaced. "I've always wanted to know more about you Mia. The issue has been about what you've been willing to share."

I sighed. "I promise to try harder moving forward."

"What are you doing this evening?" he asked.

"I have plans tonight," I answered quickly.

"Are you serious?"

"Yes. I made plans with a friend that I can't back out on," I reiterated.

I didn't care for his sharp tone or the exaggerated scowl on his face.

"Is this your way of trying to push me away again?"

He stopped eating and stared at me with such anger that it made me sink into my seat. It was enough to rid the guilt coursing through me and allow for my temper to take over.

"No. How long do you intend on holding how I reacted after we kissed over my head? I'd like to have a timeline so I can properly prepare for your outbursts," I snapped.

I couldn't contain my agitation with him nor could I apologize for it anymore. We were going to continue going around in this circle until he got over it. It was easy to spar with him when he brought out this side of me.

"Fuck you piss me off with your smart ass mouth," Ethan fumed.

"Duly noted and the feeling is mutual by the way," I retorted.

He let out a long huff before picking up his fork and taking a forceful bite of his peanut butter coated pancakes. I lost my appetite with the sudden flare-up between us.

"When can I see you again?"

My head whipped in his direction in confusion. His tone changed dramatically from the venom that it had a minute ago. Ethan placed his fork into the empty container. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. It surprised me to hear such a shift in him. I was the one that went from one extreme to the next so this was new for us.

"I don't have any plans tomorrow night."

"I'd like to spend tomorrow night with you Mia."

"That sounds perfect."

"Good. Are you sure you don't want to reconsider your no touching rule?" Ethan joked.

I sighed in relief that his humor had returned because his angry side scared me. "I'm going to stand strong on that rule."

"You're going to have to think of a pretty damn good way to distract me," he replied with a sinful smile.

I grinned. "I'm sure I'll think of something."

~

We finished the rest of the day without another incident that caused either one of us to lose our tempers. The sun was starting to set and it was time for me to pack it up for the day.

"I have to get going Ethan. It's already well past seven," I stated.

Ethan looked up from his screen. I gave him an uplifting smile rising from my seat. He made his way around the desk. We walked together towards the door where neither one of us made a move to open it. This morning's events flashed through my mind and I blushed at all the wanton feelings that ran through me from it. I grabbed the knob to open the door. His hand came down against mine. He leaned into me and my body sprang to full attention. I resisted at first but couldn't hold back for long. I wanted everything about him. I craved his body, his scent, and the liveliness he brought out in me.