Read Contingency (Covenant of Trust) Online
Authors: Paula Wiseman
Contingency (Covenant of Trust) (9 page)
Confrontation
Saturday, July 30
Bobbi punched in numbers on her calculator, double-checking the checkbook entries. Since the clock in the study slid past noon, she battled to stay focused on paying bills and budgeting for August. She regretted not giving Chuck a definite time to show up. He could come any minute now, or not at all.
She reached for her mug and finished her fourth cup of the strong Turkish coffee she brewed this morning. The caffeine hadn’t bothered her for years and the warmth always soothed and relaxed her.
Pushing the empty mug out of the way, she pulled the payment book for Chuck’s BMW from her stack. She hated that car. Things hadn’t been the same between them since he bought it. Was Chuck cheating then? Did Tracy have a thing for BMWs? If she was the reason he bought the car, was he also buying her things?
God, please tell me I haven’t spent eighteen years managing our finances so Chuck could keep a mistress.
She made a couple of changes to the budget sheet and recalculated. The house would be paid off next summer, but if they divorced ... If she started shifting more money there now, that might be enough to pay off the mortgage by the time everything was finalized.
The doorbell rang. Bobbi caught sight of Chuck’s car in the driveway.
He’s here. God help us all.
*******
Chuck stood on
his own front porch wavering between walking in or ringing the doorbell. Starting the meeting well was critical. No, this was his wife—it was a conversation, not a meeting. Even so, if he lost his temper the way he did Thursday night, he stood a zero chance of reconciling with Bobbi. She wanted to talk, so let her run things, and that meant not assuming any rights. He wiped his palm on his slacks and rang the bell.
Joel opened the front door and broke into a huge grin. He threw his arms around Chuck and squeezed. “I love you, Dad.”
Chuck kissed the top of the boy’s head. “I love you, too. I needed to hear that.”
“Mom’s in the kitchen, but Brad doesn’t want to talk to you,” Joel said as he passed his dad to go outside.
“You’re not going to stick around?”
“I don’t want to hear you yell.”
“Who said we were going to yell? Mom didn’t say that, did she?”
“No, Brad did.”
“Well, Brad’s wrong.”
“What else is new?” Joel grabbed his bike and pedaled away.
Suddenly a stranger in his own house, Chuck stepped into the entry hall. Brad’s first grade picture hung in its place in a new frame. Bobbi’s pillow and blankets lay in the corner by the sofa. She couldn’t sleep. He wished lost sleep was all he had to atone for.
Chuck followed the exotic coffee aroma and found Bobbi in the same spot at the kitchen table where he had last seen her on Thursday. He wanted to go to her, pour out his heart, beg for her forgiveness, but the coolness hanging over the room stopped him. As their eyes met, he saw resolve and determination. He debated whether to sit or stand. “Have a seat,” she said, her voice steady and firm.
He dropped into the chair opposite her. “Thanks for letting me ... uh ... come by.”
“Do you want to be with this woman?” She looked at him, not flinching or blinking, no warmth or compassion in her deep brown eyes, and he looked away.
“No.” His wife’s bluntness flustered him as she seized control of the conversation.
“Do you want out of this marriage?”
“No, of course not. I didn’t go looking for this. I ... I was stupid, and put myself in a ... well, in a situation where I would be tempted, and then I gave in.”
“Who is she?”
Bobbi heard the phone message. She knew exactly who Tracy was. Every lawyer knows you don’t ask a question unless you already know the answer. He could pass this test. “An attorney at the firm. She’s been there a few months.”
“Well, she certainly didn’t waste any time. Very ambitious.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Chuck, your name is on the side of the building! Do you honestly think she came on to you because of your charm and good looks?”
“She’s not like that.” Tracy wanted him as much as he wanted her ... didn’t she?
“Whatever.” Bobbi rolled her eyes in disgust. “How old is she?”
“I don’t know, thirty or thirty-five.”
“Is she married?”
“No.”
“How many times?”
“What?” The questions were coming so fast, he couldn’t catch his breath. She should have been a prosecutor.
“How many times ... did you ... sleep ... with her?”
“Three.” He dropped his eyes.
Please, don’t make me tell you any more than that.
“In my house?”
“Never.”
“How long has this been going on?”
“About three weeks.”
Bobbi paused a moment in her questioning, then murmured, “When the boys and I were in Detroit.”
Chuck fought back tears. “I swear, that’s not why I stayed home. It’s just ... that’s when it started.” He knew every word hurt her, but only the blinking of her eyes betrayed it.
“Is she pregnant?”
“No.”
“How do you know that for sure?”
“She told me she used a patch.” Chuck shifted in his chair and went on offense. “Bobbi, I can never explain this or justify myself. I know I can’t begin to understand how much I’ve hurt you, but you and the boys are my life. I am sorry and I promise you before God that I’ll do whatever it takes to make this right.”
“You made me a promise before God eighteen years ago, Chuck.” She spoke his name with such hopelessness that he feared it might already be too late.
“Bobbi, please. I love you. Give us a chance.”
She didn’t answer him, but went to the refrigerator for a bottled water. He watched her slowly twist the cap off, then sip from the bottle. He knew she was debating, weighing her options. She rejoined him at the table, and his chest tightened. Here it came—her terms.
“I trust Phil for counseling,” she said. “Do you?”
“Absolutely.”
“Are you committed to counseling with him?”
“Are you?”
“I’m asking the questions.”
“I will do whatever Phil tells me is in our best interest. He wants me to tell the church.”
“Are you going to?”
“I don’t know.”
“You’re not going to do the first thing he tells you to do?”
“That’s not what I said. It’s more complicated than that.”
Bobbi took a long drink from her water. He blew it on her first demand. No matter what second condition she laid down, he vowed to accept it unequivocally. “You can’t stay here,” she said.
“What?” If he let her kick him out … “This is my home.”
“Then the boys and I will go.”
“No. No, you stay. I’ll find a place.”
“One last thing.”
“Name it.” He let himself breathe again and tried to reassure himself terms were good. Terms meant they could reach an agreement.
“I want you to see a doctor.”
“Why?”
“I have to know that you haven’t picked up some disease.”
“Good grief, Bobbi, I wasn’t with some cheap hooker!” She arched her eyebrow, and folded her hands on the table in front of her. “I mean ... of course. I’ll take care of that.”
“That’s all for now. Goodbye, Chuck.”
“Just like that?”
“We’ve been civil and we’ve talked. That’s good enough for now.”
“Sure,” he said, rising from his chair. “I’ll let myself out.” He proved he was an idiot, a naïve idiot who thought he could walk in here and explain away his adultery, then have everything go back to normal.
When he got to the kitchen doorway, he caught Bobbi’s eye once more. She hadn’t softened. “Take care,” he said. Even if she didn’t divorce him, had he lost her forever?
The front door weighed more than he remembered, forcing him to brace himself before swinging it open. That woman in the kitchen wasn’t the Bobbi he’d married. He’d never seen such strength, such toughness out of her. She wore her wedding band. That had to be a good sign, but she asked him to move out. What if that was the first step to divorce?
Joel skidded his bike to a stop in the driveway. “Are you coming home tonight, Dad?”
Chuck smiled and motioned for Joel to join him on the porch steps. “It’s not that easy, Son.”
“Are you getting a divorce?”
“No. Mom and I are not getting a divorce.” Chuck could see Joel’s shoulders relax so he kept talking. “I really hurt Mom. I spent some time with another woman, giving her the kind of attention that is reserved only for Mom, and that was wrong.”
Joel nodded. “I get that part. What I don’t get is why you did it. Don’t you love Mom anymore?”
“Of course I love Mom. I just … what I did was beyond stupid.”
“Does Mom love you?”
“I think so.”
“So why would you want to be with someone else if Mom loves you and you love Mom?”
“It’s a grown-up thing, Joel. I don’t think I can explain it.”
“Try me.”
Chuck let a deep sigh escape. He’d alienated every member of his family but Joel. How could he answer him without destroying what respect the boy still held for him?
“It made me feel good that this other woman liked me.”
She met some emotional need, or you wouldn’t have gone back to her ...
“Mom likes you.”
“Yeah, but this was somebody different ... it was new ...” He dropped his head. “It sounds stupid when I try to explain it to you.”
“That’s what I was thinking, too.” He scowled and looked out across the street. “So ... what happens if some other woman likes you?”
“Nothing. Nothing happens. I will never hurt Mom like this again. Ever.”
“Did you tell Mom that?”
“Yeah, but she can’t just take my word for it. I hurt her way too much for that.”
“Is that why you can’t come home?”
“For now. It’s going to take some time, Buddy. You know, when Brad makes you mad, and you just want to be by yourself for a while?”
“Yes!”
“Well, Mom’s going to need some time to work through being mad at me. I deserve to have her mad at me.” Chuck patted Joel’s knee and stood up. “Same with Brad. Let him be mad, okay?”
“Okay,” Joel shrugged. “You’re not divorcing. That’s all I was worried about.”
“See you at church, Buddy,” Chuck said as he got in his car.
“Bye, Dad!” Joel called. “Love you!”
Chuck smiled and waved as he backed out of the driveway. Before he turned off his block, he dialed Phil Shannon’s number. “Have you got a few minutes? I won’t take long, but I’m in big trouble.”
*******
Before Chuck even
pulled out of the driveway, Bobbi rushed to the downstairs bathroom to throw up again. The details were too much. The less she knew, the better.
Chuck didn’t say he wanted out, but what did he want? Did he even know? A thirty-year-old lawyer. She couldn’t compete with that.
You got every answer you asked for. He seemed contrite, penitent. He was hurting, too.
She’d seen Chuck’s reflection in the microwave, and watched as he wiped his eyes.
God help me. I believe him. Now what?
She wanted to run after him so he could take her in his arms, tell her everything would work out, and let her cry on his shoulder. It would be so much easier that way. But that would make her a fool. Only a fool would absorb the hurt and the anger. Only a fool would trust him again. He said he loved her, finally, but that wasn’t enough. Things had to change, and Chuck had to change.
She swished a mouthful of mouthwash and spit it in the bathroom sink.
If I get through this with any of my sanity left, it’ll be a miracle.
“Brad!” she called upstairs. “He’s gone. Do you want to go to the mall? I’ll even drop you at a different door!” Bobbi wanted to get out of the house, to do something normal, and forget she was a victim of infidelity.
Brad tromped down the stairs. “You don’t have to do that,” he said with a sly grin. “Just wait about ten minutes before you follow me in.”
“You rotten kid,” Bobbi said with a smile. She rummaged through her purse, making sure she had her keys and phone.
“So how did it go?” Brad asked. “More lies?”
So much for thinking about something else. Setting her purse down on the console table, she turned to face her son. “Do you want us to split up?”
