Conviction: Devine (6 page)

“Isla!” Jake called out but I marched ahead until he caught my wrist and spun me around to face him. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.” He was still chuckling but I could see him struggling to control it.

“I’m sorry I don’t understand the rules. I’m new to all this.”

He nodded firmly, taking both my hands in his and kissing the knuckles on my right hand. “I know. I know. I’m sorry.”

“Well, don’t make fun of my suggestions. I thought it was a good idea!”

He ran his thumb across my pouting lip and nodded again. “I know, and believe me, if I knew that could work then I’m sure every ring in the country would be all for it. Unfortunately, we’re all greedy fuckers. We all want the top spot and fighting is a necessity to keep everyone in line.”

“It’s stupid!”

He shrugged and tugged my hands so my body pressed against his. “You’ll also find that the women here are the same, sadly.”

“Wonderful!” I huffed as we made our way back into the mass. “I think I’ll stick to Adam and Keegan.”

Kris was stood to one side of the garden, leaning against a fence, watching us closely, a bottle to his lips as he took frequent swigs.

Jake, noticing me looking, leaned towards me. “Kris isn’t a sociable person, but Kee is his best friend and I’m his oldest friend so he makes an appearance at the yearly do. Just take him with a pinch of salt.”

I nodded in reply, unsure what to say. If I hadn’t seen so much hatred in a single expression then I wouldn’t have believed one look could have said so much. It wasn’t a hatred directed towards me, but a general one, an anger that blazed in his eyes. I wasn’t sure what the anger and hatred was for or why it was there yet I sensed Kris had lots of demons underneath his stern exterior. I smiled at him, ignoring the narrow eyes that reflected back at me before I turned to Jake. “I think some of us are just angry at things none of us can understand.”

“Or control,” Jake added. When I gave him an expectant look, waiting for him to clarify, he shook his head and turned to Adam who was running towards us.

“Hey, Isla.” Adam said with a genuine smile before looking at Jake. “I need a few days off.”

“For?”

Adam blew out a breath then smiled. “I found him.”

Jake grinned at Adam and slapped him on the back. “Where?”

“France. I have a problem though.”

Jake lifted a finger in the air towards Keegan who scurried up the garden when Jake motioned for him. My God, I thought I’d seen it all. Jake seriously thought he was bloody God. I hoped he didn’t expect me to behave like that, running to him with a click of his fingers. He’d be sorely disappointed.

“Kee, watch Isla for me. Adam and I have a bit of business.”

Keegan nodded. I stared at Jake with an open mouth. “I’m not a child, Jake. I’m quite capable of fixing myself a burger and a beer.”

Jake shook his head arrogantly before following Adam up towards Keegan’s house. “And watch your fucking brother!” he shouted at Keegan over his shoulder.

Narrowing my eyes on Keegan who gave me a guilt ridden half-smile, I practically growled. “I do not need a babysitter, whatever the lord and master requested. If you value your testicles attached to your penis instead of fixed to the fence with a rusty nail then I would back off and let me do my own thing.”

Keegan, bless him, swallowed loudly, flicked a glance up the garden towards where Jake and Adam had disappeared then gave me a grimace. “Please, Isla . . .”

Shaking my head slowly and glaring at him, I made a scissor motion with my fingers and looked pointedly at the fence. Keegan sighed then gestured with a wave of an arm that he gave in, and let me pass him to the beer barrels where I swiped up another beer and made my way to the barbeque.

Making my way down the garden with my cool drink and sizzling hotdog, I sighed appreciatively when I came across a small brook, the trickling water secluded from the rest of the party and very tranquil, its beauty giving me the much needed peace for my buzzing head.

I removed my shoes and socks then carefully perched my bottom on the edge of the banking. I dipped in my toes, took a bite of my sausage and sighed contentedly. I would have killed for such a breath-taking private place near the cottage. Nature truly was magnificent; it was a shame ninety percent of the population on such a beautiful planet weren’t as remarkable. Jake’s life was so far from what I was that I struggled to see where we would end up in the coming months. I loved him, of that I had no doubt, but I wasn’t confident I could be who he wanted or needed me to be. I admitted there was a darkness inside me that, rather horrifyingly, revelled in the macabre and merciless. For a long time I had refused to accept it, my mind morphing my beliefs into thinking that I was just struggling from PTSD or something similar. But being with Jake had opened my mind and for the first time I understood that some people were just created that way, like black and white, hot and cold—good and bad. There was always an opposite for anything, my light being other people’s darkness. Yet with Jake, the chill in my heart cooled the raging burn in his—and his fire heated the cold rage within me. But his world and his status, the epicentre of the criminal empire, had me wondering if I could handle this side to him.

I turned, shielding my eyes from the evening sun when I heard someone approach behind me. I squinted for a moment as someone smiled at me. “Bloody hell!” I gasped as I stood up quickly. “Tommy!”

Tommy, Seb’s best friend since school, enveloped me in his arms and pulled me into a hug. “Isla.”

I frowned. He’d lost weight, a lot, his ribs virtually sticking into mine and his shoulder blades prominent making the hug awkward.

“What are you doing here?” I asked as we broke apart and settled back in front of the stream. I caught a glimpse of Keegan watching me from beside a tree and sighed but left him to it. I felt guilty for putting him in such a position, so this way he was still following orders and watching me but giving me space.

“Keegan’s a friend of mine,” Tommy divulged before he looked out to the water and sighed heavily. “I miss him, Isla.”

I nodded and slipped my hand over his, linking my fingers in his. “I know. Me too.”

“Have you heard anything else from the police?”

I snorted and shook my head. “You’re joking. I’m sure I’m their prime suspect now I’m with Jake and I’ve been arrested for murder.”

Tommy cringed and flicked a quick glance towards me. “Be careful. No one messes with Jake Devine. He’s notorious for being merciless. He’s cruel and fucking lethal.”

“But not with me, Tommy.” I hated that I had to make excuses yet again, but it also angered me that people never got to see the real Jake, the compassionate, loving and affectionate side to him, the side that protected me and cared for me. The side that worshipped me almost to the point of suffocation.

“I understand, believe me I do. I said to Seb when he got in with that posh bitch . . .”

“What?” I broke in sharply. “What posh bitch?”

Tommy cocked his head when he realised I didn’t know about Seb’s girlfriend. “He didn’t tell you?”

“Obviously not!”

“He was seeing her for a few months. He changed. He seemed to get deeper into the heroin; moodier and paranoid. He started on crack. I tried to talk to him, get him to see what was happening but he pushed me away.”

“Who was she?” I asked, my heart galloping and making my head throb.

He shook his head. “I don’t know, I never met her. The only glimpse I got of her was a naked photo she’d sent Seb, and even then it wasn’t really clear on Seb’s shit 1980s phone.” He turned to me, his nose crinkled. “From the background of the shot, she had money. The room was full of classy furniture and smart silk cushions; all that shit. But it wasn’t just her money. The way he talked about her and how he changed; I didn’t like her at all. I told the police. I thought they’d have asked you about her.”

I looked back to the water, the rampant race in my head making my headache speed towards an encroaching migraine, my belly twisting with nausea. “Why didn’t he tell me?”

“I don’t know. I’m sure there was only me who knew about her. No one else in our circle has mentioned her. I asked around but no one had seen her; even the people in his block of flats never saw her. It makes me think she was hiding herself for some reason.” His face grew serious, his eyes narrowing as he looked at me. “I’m sure there’s something I’m not seeing and I’m positive she had something to do with his death.”

I nodded. “Do you know if Seb ever took her to see my mother?”

“I don’t think so. . . . oh . . .” He tipped his head as if trying to remember something then nodded slowly. “Yeah, I think he did. He’d said that she was the one and that he’d taken her to visit Marianne but it was one of her bad days and she was completely unaware he was there.”

I needed to visit Dr Lovejoy but trying to see him without Jake going off on a controlling bender was going to be difficult.

As if Jake knew I was plotting, he suddenly appeared to the side of Tommy and me, his glare on Tommy making me prepared for a fight. Quickly I stood up and warned Jake with a glare of my own. “Jake, this is Tommy French, Seb’s best friend.”

Jake blinked, his expression immediately softening before he tipped his head respectfully at Tommy. “Hi. Good to meet you.”

Tommy smiled and returned Jake’s handshake. “And you.” Turning to me, Tommy smiled with such a sad expression that my heart nearly broke for him. “You take care, Isla.”

Ignoring Jake who hovered like a possessive lion, I drew Tommy into a hug. “You too.”

He nodded then walked away, my eyes following him as I rapidly tried to build a cover story in my head. Turning, I found Jake watching me intensely. I was sure he could read my mind but I closed my eyes for a moment and groaned. “I have a migraine. Do you mind if I go home?”

Jake took my hand, his brow creasing with worry. “You should have told me. We could have gone earlier.”

“That’s okay.” I shook my head, feeling guilty with the way he fussed round me. “It was just a headache but I think the sun has made it worse. Plus I’m tired and the beer hasn’t helped.”

“Come on.” He kissed my forehead as he wrapped his arm around my shoulder and directed me back to the house. “I’ll take you home.”

“Don’t be silly. I’ll get a taxi. You stay and spend time with your friends.”

“No. I’ll run you home. You need some TLC.”

My heart swelled and I hated that I was lying to him but my focus was on the mysterious woman in Seb’s life. If he’d taken her to see my mother then Dr Lovejoy might have seen her, or maybe she would be on The Grange’s surveillance recordings. I knew I’d have to go way back but I was willing to spend the rest of my days scrolling through them if it gave me an insight into Seb’s death.

Reaching up on my toes, I kissed Jake softly, my soul sighing with the amount of love bursting through me. “As much as I love you for offering, I just want to climb under the duvet in the dark and sleep.”

He looked at me, regarding me for a moment before he sighed and conceded. “Fine, I’ll take you home then come back to the party.”

That was the best I was going to get so I smiled and kissed him again, the touch of his lips on mine soothing the ache in my chest. “Thank you. What would I do without you?”

“Live a quiet life.” He chuckled.

I couldn’t help but agree with him.

I
BRACED MYSELF WHEN
I saw Dr Lovejoy’s shadow through the glass in the door. Swallowing back my repugnance at a man that justified to himself that it was okay to assault women while they were hypnotised, I smiled widely when he opened the door.

Jake had dropped me off at home forty minutes ago, tucked me up in bed then gone back to the party. I’d watched his car disappear around the small bend in the gravel road that led to the cottage then I’d hurried back up and phoned Dr Lovejoy, who had told me to go to his house.

“Isla,” he said with a large toothy grin. I shivered involuntarily, now picturing a man I had once respected as a wolf, the image of blood dripping off his teeth making my skin break out in goosebumps.

“Dr Lovejoy,” I returned as I stepped into his long hallway.

“Please, call me Pete, there’s no need for such formalities now.” I gave him a half-smile and followed him into a large open plan room that was scarcely decorated. “Take a seat.” He gestured to a sofa, however I sat in the small armchair situated in front of the fire and held my hands to the flame, pretending the reason for taking the solo chair was that I was cold. “Can I get you a drink? I have your favourite. Jack Daniels.”

I peered at him, slightly spooked by how he knew my favourite drink then shook my head. “I’ll just take some water, please.”

“Of course.” He smiled then disappeared behind a counter set to one side of the room. I wanted to give the room a once over but I kept my eyes trained on the doc as he plucked a glass from a cupboard then held it under the running tap. I had a feeling Jake wouldn’t appreciate me being there so getting my drink spiked and passing out in a sadomasochist’s house might just push him over the limit with my punishment this time.

“So, Isla.” He smiled and settled on the sofa opposite me after passing me my drink. “How can I help you?”