Courting Mrs. McCarthy (11 page)

There was a breeze coming in as the sun began to make its slow descent when they finished their swordfish. Nathan had ice cream in the freezer but they were hardly through half the bottle of wine. He thought about where the night was headed and where he wanted it to go.

“Do you want some ice cream?” he asked. Ice cream and wine were an odd combination. Girls could be picky about dessert, but he didn’t think that was Jackie’s style.

“I’d love some,” she replied. “What kind do you have?”

Nathan had spent nearly ten minutes in the ice cream section of the supermarket before deciding on cookies and cream. It was a little unconventional, but a safe gamble. Not boring like chocolate or safe like vanilla, but still something that anyone with a soul could appreciate.

She refilled their wine glasses while Nathan scooped the ice cream. Nathan kept reminding himself not to worry about her eventual need to return home, but the thought of her kids kept returning to him. He didn’t necessarily take this as a good sign.

“Do you want to watch a movie?” he asked as he gave her a cup of ice cream.

“Sure. I haven’t seen an adult movie since the plane ride over here. What do you have?”

Nathan tried not to laugh at Jackie’s obliviousness as to what else the phrase
adult film
meant.

Then he realized he had no idea what movies were available in the house. He wandered over to the closet where the DVDs were kept, unsure of what he would find.

“What sort of movies do you like?” he asked, while he tried not to panic. The answer was largely irrelevant and he zoned out to look at the selection.

Jerome loved westerns and there were many Clint Eastwood movies in his collection. He spotted
Field of Dreams
and quickly moved on. Sappiness would be of no help to him. He saw
The Big Lebowski
and made a mental note to take that with him to watch with Griffin. Then he saw a classic that he couldn’t possibly refuse.

“Hey Jackie, have you ever seen
This is Spinal Tap
?” he asked.

“No. What’s it about?”

Good
, he thought.

Watching a movie with a girl can achieve one of two things. Movies with Sarah rarely involved watching the film but Nathan learned to rectify this by just picking films he’d already seen. If Sarah was in one of her moods, or if he just got bored, there was something to watch.

Movie time is not without some risk if you’ve never hooked up with the person before. While the suggestion itself if often used as code for wanting to move toward an intimate part in the evening, there’s really no going back from that. If you don’t make a move, you’re essentially friend-zoning yourself. Nathan was entering a do or die point with Jackie.

When he was done putting the movie in, he went to join her on the couch. She was positioned a little right of center on it and Nathan took the far left side so as to not make his intentions so obvious. He got up almost immediately afterward to turn the lights off. He was initially worried with how that might be perceived, but it is was worth it for the sake of setting the tone. His signals had already been sent.

Nathan gave Jackie a brief summary of the movie before it started. Fake documentary of a fake rock band was not a very difficult concept to grasp. He just hoped she would either find it funny or that things would progress enough that it didn’t matter.

As the movie progressed, Nathan saw Jackie moving closer to him inch by inch. It was dark, so the minor movement might have existed as a figment of his imagination. Regardless, he decided to push things forward a little faster.

When she’d inched close enough to her, Nathan finally saw his moment to act. He put his arm around her shoulder. This was big, and there was no going back from here. Jackie showed just the slightest bit of reservation before nestling into the crevice of his shoulder. She moved her whole body onto the couch, giving Nathan room to put his feet up as well which put him in a more relaxed position. What they were doing was most certainly a snuggle.

Nathan knew what normally came next even though there were no standards for the path he was on. He wondered how affairs usually started without judging the fact that he fully accepted that what he was doing was a violation of one of the Ten Commandments. All the thoughts he’d experienced about morality faded from his brain. This was what he wanted, and he could gather beyond a reasonable doubt that it was what Jackie wanted too.

That didn’t stop him from opening his mouth.

“Jackie,” he started to say. She turned around so they were facing each other.

“Shh,” she said, putting her finger to his mouth. “You’ll spoil the moment.”

They kissed. Time, ideas of whether this was right or wrong, and all the other voices in his head stopped. Nathan’s brain switched over to autopilot and knew when the moment was right to end their first kiss. He adhered to her command to keep quiet and stared deep into her eyes. Two weeks ago, Jackie McCarthy was just a name to him, one he wouldn’t have given a second thought about. Now she mattered. Now she was the object of his youthful desire. What he was to her didn’t matter tonight.

She broke the silence. “You do have a bedroom here, right?”

Nathan nodded, and she got off the couch with his hand in her palm.

“Show me the way,” she whispered.

His legs were slightly asleep, but he wasn’t going to let that bother him. He was thankful that “Tonight I’m Gonna Rock You” had already played in the film, for that would have ruined the moment.

The moment that Nathan lost his virginity to Jacqueline McCarthy.

Chapter 16

The night was still relatively young when they were finished with the physical portion of their romantic activities. He didn’t know if people liked to cuddle after committing adultery, but he tried anyway. Jackie seemed to enjoy him holding her.

Neither one of them had said a word in what had been at least an hour. Nathan’s rulebook for taboo topics was largely out the door and even a bit irrelevant, but nothing had taken its place. Anything he said could be counter-productive to what he wanted, which was for Jackie to stay with him.

She seemed to sense that his mind might be in a peculiar place. “What are you thinking about, silly?” she asked, as she rolled over to face him. He was naked in the presence of a much older woman, but he felt calm and collected as if this was precisely where he needed to be.

“Do I still get to take you on adventures?” he asked, desperate for some clarity on whether or not things would be awkward from here on out. This was certainly not going with the flow, but Nathan was at a point where that no longer seemed as relevant. Being with Jackie intimately was one thing that would change his life, but he wasn’t ready to let this be the only thing that happened between them. He needed to know if this was going anywhere.

“Nathan, you are the most amazing young man I’ve ever met, but I’m a grown woman with children. This cannot happen,” she said, seemingly ignoring what had just occurred. The bliss was gone.

Nathan felt terrible. The “young man” comment bruised him hard as he tried to figure out what had gone wrong. He questioned his ability to please her, as his sexual inexperience was hard to ignore.

“I know you’re only here for the summer, but I get that,” he said. “I know what it’s like to get attached to someone when it’s not the right time.”

Jackie’s despondent expression showed that what he’d said had struck a chord inside of her if only just a small one. “Nathan, I’m not just here for the summer. I’m leaving Steve. I’m not going back to Seattle.”

He struggled to understand why this curveball was accompanied by a rejection when it was supposed to be good news. He was supposed to get rid of Steve so he could have her for good. “If that’s the case, why can’t we see each other?” he asked. It was difficult for him to be honest without sounding desperate or clingy. He saw a glimmer of hope that he needed to kindle quickly before losing her entirely.

Jackie continued to look conflicted. “Nathan, you’re seventeen and I’m thirty-five. Is that something that really doesn’t make sense to you?”

He saw an opportunity to rebuff a few of the claims she’d made. He was still naked, but this was somehow empowering rather than humiliating, as if he could speak honestly without a fear in the world. “Am I going to say that we don’t have a chance and that I don’t want to see you because of numbers? No. Does it make a difference to me? No, Jackie. It doesn’t. I don’t think it matters to you either. You and I are fundamentally compatible people. We exist outside the normalcy of our surroundings and that doesn’t bother me a bit. Age may not just be a number, but we’re compatible beyond that. You know it.”

She started to speak but Nathan cut her off to make his full case before she could rebuff it and squash their chances. He spoke with both sincerity and diplomacy. “Look, I get that this is weird. I’m not drawn to it for any other reason than I like you. When I looked at you I saw someone different from the rest, and by everything that’s happened since that, I know you’ve definitely felt something for me too. I’m not saying we do anything drastic, but there’s no reason to close doors that don’t have to be shut. Whatever happens, happens, and then neither one of us needs to spend any time wondering what could’ve been if it fizzles out.”

Nathan laid back comfortably as he gave Jackie time to absorb what he’d said. He knew he’d been at least somewhat convincing. The last time he’d been in a bedroom with a girl, he let her dictate the tone of the room because the passion to speak differently just wasn’t there. The doubt he’d had from that night was whisked away, for he had just proven to himself that he would fight for what he felt for Jackie.

He wasn’t nervous and he wasn’t drunk anymore. He could go to sleep that night knowing that he had made his stand. He wondered what Mrs. Buchanan would think if she could see him now, and then was grossed out by the thought.

Jackie looked like she was trying to look for a reason to say no. Nathan added, “Just give it a chance.”

She said, “Okay,” almost instantly.

Then she climbed back into bed and snuggled up next to him.

Nathan had won their brief conflict. He had courted Mrs. McCarthy at least for another date. Any doubt had left his mind. He lay in a bed in a house that he once lived in but never really called home with a woman more than twice his age. All the things that seemed wrong with the situation didn’t matter. Nathan felt right.

After a half hour of quite non-argumentative snuggling, Jackie started to lay down some ground rules. What they were doing had to be kept a secret. They could not be seen in public displaying anything that might be interpreted as affection. For the time being, Nathan had been relieved of his duties as babysitter for the McCarthy children. He wanted to object to this, but Jackie said it made her uncomfortable and could be revisited at a later date.

Given the terms that were agreed to, Nathan found himself in a more defined association than what he’d had with Sarah. Of all the things that were strange about them, they both knew that one night of romantic relations did not equate a relationship. They were seeing where things went. Nothing more, nothing less.

Jackie left to go home a little before midnight. Nathan wanted to ask her to stay, but decided against it. The night had been enough of a victory. Jackie gave him a kiss and exited his bedroom. It was a perfectly reasonable time for him to go to bed, but he felt wide awake and spent the next hour or so thinking about the most insane home dinner date he’d ever have in his life.

The night had been a whirlwind to say the least. In a medley of absurdist scenarios, Nathan had achieved his coming of age moment into manhood and also retained the companionship of the much older woman he’d shared intimacy with. Defying odds almost summed it up too well, as there was nothing in his mind to compare this to.

She also apparently was no longer leaving to go back to Seattle when the summer was over. This didn’t need to be just a fling with a finite ending. Nathan didn’t want to think about that just yet, but he was pleased to have been blessed with such a fortunate situation.

His usual fear of abandonment when making new relationships had not applied yet. Previously knowing their time would be limited, Nathan had felt at ease with the fact that Jackie would be a temporary person in his life regardless of what he could try to do to stop it.

Now that things had changed, he tried to figure out how he felt about that. His emotions were at such a high level anyway that such an endeavor was pointless to attempt at this moment in time. When the emotions started to settle, he drifted off to sleep.

The next morning, he woke up and cleaned up the house. There wasn’t much of a mess, but he put everything back in its place and put all the garbage into a big bag that he would need to dispose of somewhere else. Jerome had canceled the garbage service while in London. He doubted that his aunt would approve of him using his house for dates regardless of what age the girl might be. The thought of having that conversation with his father was worth the extra precautions.

He noticed that Griffin had texted him to see if he wanted to have breakfast at Seers Point. He was tempted to cook breakfast at his aunt and uncle’s house since they had taken the twins to softball, but he decided to opt for the social route.

There was a convenient dumpster on the way to the club, where Nathan dumped the garbage. Griffin’s car was in the lot when he arrived. The combination of punctuality and desire to grab a morning meal told Nathan that he wasn’t the only one who’d had a memorable night.

He ordered some breakfast and sat down at a table with Griffin, who did not look well. Nathan was still in a very cheerful mood. “How was the party last night?” he asked. “Was the girl from under the covers there?”

Griffin did not look amused. “Not that I saw, though I didn’t go looking through any of the bedrooms for cheating skanks. The cops busted it a little after eleven. I got out through the basement. Ralph got a mouthful from the cops, but they let him go. Hopefully, that doesn’t set any standards for the rest of the summer.”

This bit of information might have been noteworthy to Nathan on a different day. He feigned interest. “Oh, that’s no good.”

Griffin eyed him suspiciously. “That’s not all that was interesting about last night,” he said.

Nathan wore an expression of curiosity, wondering what would come next. “Oh, yeah? And what might that be?”

Griffin looked at him like he was angry but he still had a smile on his face that showed he knew something. “Oh, is that really how you’re going to play it? Are you sure you don’t have something to tell me?”

This was troubling to Nathan. How on earth could Griffin know about his night with Jackie? If word got out this quickly, his future with her was not looking promising.

He tried to play it cool. “I’m not sure. Why don’t you stop playing games and tell me what you’ve heard?”

This deflection seemed puzzling to Griffin. He replied conspicuously. “Word on the street is that you and Sarah are no longer together.”

Relief flooded him. Griffin knew nothing after all. Well, nothing important.

He had to stop himself from looking so relieved, which might instantly give away the fact that he was hiding something else. “Oh, yes. Sorry about that. We broke up, and it was sad. I didn’t want to tell anyone because school was getting out and no one will care come September. I just didn’t want to talk about it.” Nathan spoke in a diplomatic fashion that he hoped would suffice as an apology. This did paint him as a victim even though he’d stopped caring about it weeks ago.

“I get it,” Griffin said. “Look, I know you need your space and all of that stuff, but I’m your best friend and I’ve got your back always and forever. At the very least, we could have smoked a joint after it happened. You should have told me, man.”

Nathan wanted to tell him they had in fact done just that, but he decided against it. He felt bad for lying and felt even worse that he was keeping more secrets. But Griffin appeared to be okay with it.

As they were finishing their breakfast, he heard a familiar voice. “Hi, Nathan,” April exclaimed, as she ran up to him. “I’m sorry you couldn’t babysit us last night. Zhanna isn’t as fun as you. She doesn’t cook as well either.”

It was as if all the good luck he’d acquired over the past few weeks had crumbled in seconds. Griffin glared at him with a look of betrayal. He didn’t even think he was supposed to be talking to April, who would also be hurt if he brushed her off. Talking to her was more awkward than he ever expected it would be. He glanced off in the distance and saw Jackie wave at him. He wanted to go to her, but he had matters to attend to.

Griffin started to get up. He didn’t look outwardly angry, but Nathan thought he was being civil because April was there. He started to walk away. Nathan was conflicted as to whether or not he should follow him. He said goodbye to April and started after his friend.

“Griffin, wait,” he called out.

His friend stopped and turned around to face him. “You know, I stand by what I said about you needing your space, but that generally doesn’t involve a whole bunch of lies.”

Nathan saw sadness on his face more than anything else.

The only real lie had been about his whereabouts the night before, but Nathan felt an urge to come clean to Griffin about Jackie. He desperately wished that he could have more time with his secret, but he would not have something like that damage his longest lasting relationship, his friendship with Griffin.

“Can we go somewhere to talk? I’ll explain everything, just not here.”