Cursed Heart (Cursed #2.5) (6 page)

I feel relieved—anger abated and thinking more clearly, I know what I need to do. She is my safety net, the one that will help me finally break through. Tomorrow, I will go back to her and tell her exactly what she means to me. As crazy as it sounds, I need her to realize that she needs me as much as I need her.

Finishing up my shower, I step out, dry off, and move to my bedroom. As I grab a pair of boxer briefs out of the drawer, hope begins to swell inside of me.

I know what I want to do, what I need to do, and I’m more than excited to see her tomorrow. Closing my eyes with a smile across my face, I fall into a deep sleep filled with images of my mysterious blue-haired beauty.

Chapter 8

My nerves are a tangled mess as I stand outside of her hospital room. I’m not sure how this will all go down, but I need for her to know and understand where I’m coming from.

Obviously, we both have difficult pasts and neither one of us knows much about the other. It’s time to be the man I’ve wanted to be for so long and take a stand; I won’t let her go without a fight.

Running my fingers through my hair, I take in a deep breath and exhale.
It’s now or never, Christian, you can do this.
My hand presses against the door and I push through to see her standing there, eyes wide. My mouth goes dry and it’s difficult to swallow.

“Christian?” she mutters in a questioning tone.

Standing with my hands in my pockets, I look her over from head to toe. My heart is beating so fast, I can feel it pulsating through my fingertips. She’s dressed in a pair of hospital scrubs hanging loosely from her small frame. Her hair is pulled in all directions, and her face, although bruised, is glowing.

“I couldn’t let you leave the hospital without saying goodbye. I’ve been racking my brain, asking myself why I care so damn much, and I’ve come up empty.”

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I take a step in her direction. Brave isn’t even big enough of a word to describe what I’m feeling right now. I’m not sure how she’s going to take what I have to tell her. For all I know, I could get a slap across the face and a kick in the ass out the door.

Her eyes are filled with intensity and I can’t hold back my feelings a moment longer.

“There’s something about you, Gretchen, that pulls me to you. I want to be near you and help you. We don’t know one another at all, and I get that, but if you’d give me the chance, I’d like to be your friend.”

She looks deeply into my eyes and it’s as if our souls are communicating with one another.

“I’m sorry for being a bitch earlier. There’s just a lot on my mind and I’m not one to let others into my world. If you really want to be my friend,” she stops herself for a brief second and smiles, “you’ll have to call me Etty and not Gretchen; it’s what my friends call me.”

A huge grin spreads across my face as I pull her into my arms and she lets her body to mold into mine. Allowing my eyes to close, I feel at peace; no matter what, she is now a part of my life and I won’t let myself screw this up.

“Thank you, Christian.”

“For what?” I ask, pulling her tighter in to my body.

“Being a friend and coming back here. I guess I needed you more than I realized.”

Yes, she finally gets it…thank God!

“I’ll be here for you as long as you’ll allow me; you just have to let me in.”

Pulling herself away from me, I instantly miss the touch of her body against mine. She looks up into my eyes once again. They’re filled with so much happiness as I return a sincere look and flash a wink.

“I really want to find Linc and see how Jo is before heading home. After all, if they’re here, I really don’t have much to go home to, anyway.”

“I’ve already checked to see where Linc’s room is so we can head on up there if you want. I won’t stay if you don’t need me to; just know that I’m here for you.”

“You have no idea how much I appreciate this, Christian.”

Taking the bag from her hands, I reach out for her as she intertwines our fingers. A tingling sensation shoots up my arm and I revel in the moment for a brief second.

Leading her out of the room, we move down the hall and toward an elevator. As we ride to the next floor, I don’t know when the last time was that I felt like this—most likely never.

She pulls her hand from mind and runs it down the length of her thigh. Sensing that her nerves must be a scattered mess, I look down at her from the corner of my eye.

“Are you okay?”

Nodding her head, she lets out a puff of air, her blue strands of hair flying in front of her face.

“Yeah, I’m just nervous to see Linc. I don’t know how he’ll react. He’s been my rock since moving here and I don’t know what I’ll do if he doesn’t want to see me.”

As the doors open, I once again reach for her hand and lead her out into the hallway. Stopping just short of the elevator, I turn, backing her up against the wall. Tilting her chin up to face me, I stare into her eyes. I can feel the rapid beats of her heart pounding against my chest. I want to ease her tension and let her know that everything will be okay as long as I’m by her side.

“I don’t know how strong your relationship is with Linc, or exactly what’s gone down the past few days. What I
do
know is that you are strong, and you give off this impression that people are only out to get you. Talk to him, tell him what happened and how you’re feeling. If he’s as good of a friend as you make him out to be, I’m sure he’ll understand.”

Closing her eyes and taking in a deep breath, she opens her brilliant greens to show me her strength.

“Okay,” she replies.

Letting go of her chin, I take a step back.

“Good, now let’s go see Linc so that you can let go of all this anxiety you’re feeling.”

Taking a step ahead of her, I can feel her following closely behind me while walking through the halls leading to Linc’s room.

I stop in front of a closed door and lean up against the wall.

“I’ll be right out here if you need me.”

She gives me a half smile and moves toward the door, turning the knob.

No matter how long it takes, I’ll wait out here until she needs me. I know nothing of what is about to happen in that room, but the moment she comes out, I’ll be here to show her the support and compassion I know she’ll need.

Staring at the sterile white wall in front of me, I feel good…really good. I’m glad that I was able to change my mindset to one that is much more positive than that of last night.

Times will get tough, but I know that I have the will and strength to get through them. All I need is a little inspiration and encouragement, and she’s given that to me more than she’ll ever know.

Today is the start of good things to come and I’ll be anxiously waiting to see how this friendship unfolds. Once she’s free and clear of the hospital drama, I want to do something special for her. We need time to talk—to get to know one another—and more than anything, I want to make sure she’s well taken care of with the injuries she’s faced herself.

I’ll be her friend, her rock, and anything else she’ll allow me to be for her. The monster in me is gone and I want to show her and the world the man that I want to be proud of.

Chapter 9

2 Weeks Later

The past two weeks have been the best days of my life. My feelings for Etty have grown so much. Every day, I can tell that I’m falling harder and harder for my blue-haired girl.

She’s been cooped up in the house the entire time, not wanting to leave. I know that inside she’s hurting, and there’s only so much I can do to help her through that pain. The symptoms of her concussion have greatly subsided, but there’s a lot more that she has on her plate to worry about.

I’ve gotten to spend time with her and Linc at the house and while they’ve come to the hospital to see Jo. I keep my distance when they’re together, but always let her know that I’m here when she needs me.

Linc is a lot to compete with; he seems to be the rock that’s able to hold her together. He appears to be a nice guy that genuinely cares about her. No matter how much I want to be that man for her, I understand that their relationship is one that has been built on trust and friendship. He’s not the one that poses a threat to me; it’s the asshole Dault that lives with him.

Etty has shared with me the struggles she’s faced with Dault—the ways in which he’s treated her and the moment of weakness when she gave herself to him. It causes my blood to boil knowing he’s placed his hands on her in ways I only wish I could. The thought alone makes me sick to my stomach, but there’s nothing I can do but hope he stays a part of her past.

We’ve run into him a few times at the house and the hospital. I hate the way he speaks to her and the looks he gives her. At times it confuses me—does he really despise her or is he feeling the same way I do? I can only hope that he continues to keep his distance; the further away from him I can keep her, the more I can show her that I’m the man she needs.

I’ve told her numerous times how I feel about her and I’ve tried to get closer, but her walls are built too high for me to reach. Together, we’ve shared in our most private moments; she’s one of the only people outside of Dr. Jonestown that I’ve ever talked to about my past. It wasn’t easy, but with her I feel as though I can be honest, real, and let my guard down.

Tonight, I took her out for some fun. She’s been locked up in the house for the past few weeks, and after hours of compromise, she finally agreed to dinner and a movie. I was over the moon excited and couldn’t wait to get off of work to pick her up.

Now, on the way back to her house, I have to say that our night out was a success. We talked like we’ve known each other for years. My comfort level with her is intense—I feel like I can uncover my darkest and deepest thoughts and she’ll never judge me.

My body shifts in the driver’s seat and I can see her glance in my direction. I turn to face her with a smile and a wink. She smiles back at me, but lacks the intense gaze I long for. I want so badly for her to feel the same way I do. No matter how much I try to show and tell her I care, she can’t reciprocate the same feelings. I keep telling myself that I just need to give her time…time will help her realize how much I really mean to her. Being friends is a start, but right now, tomorrow, even days from now, I’m still going to want so much more from her.

Pulling up to the house, I can see both Linc and Dault standing in front of the house. A nagging sickness begins to stir up in my stomach at the sight of him. My protectiveness goes into full effect and I feel the need to stand before her so that he doesn’t attack.

I turn the car off, get out, and move to her side before she can get out. I need to block her from him at all costs; ruining our night is not an option. Opening the door for her, she steps out and is immediately greeted by Linc’s voice.

“Hey, Etty, glad to see you got out of the house. You’re looking pretty damn good tonight, too. Was this a date?” he asks with a laugh.

Watching as Etty completely brushes Linc off, I move toward her, pulling her into my side.

“Linc, how’s the arm?” I ask.

“Good, thanks for asking. So what were you two up to tonight?” Linc asks, moving toward the back of Dault’s car.

Etty looks up and stares into my eyes, witnessing the smile sprawled across my face.

“I finally got Etty out of the house,” I reply with all the pride I can muster.

Linc turns to look at both of us with a confused look on his face.

“Yeah, I can see that. What did you two do?”

Sensing the tension building in Etty’s body, I feel bad that Linc is digging for information on our night.

“It’s not a big deal, guys. Christian suggested we do something so we went for dinner and a movie.”

“Sounds like a date to me,” Dault says.

My eyes scan from Etty to Dault, a look of pure hatred staring back at me.