Damaged and the Beast (27 page)

Pressing back against him, I met his hips and Cooper groaned. “Show me,” I said, glancing at him again.

“Maybe if we go slow enough…”

“It won’t help. I don’t know why, but I can’t get back to that moment.”

“Was I…”

“You weren’t anything except the hottest fucker I’ve ever seen.”

Cooper gave me a cocky grin. “Hell yeah.”

“Please, don’t stop,” I said, caressing his arms wrapped around me. “It can’t be healthy to stop in the middle like that. Or at the end or whenever you stopped.”

Cooper laughed. “You have the hottest sex talk ever.”

“Oh, yeah,” I moaned dramatically. “Oh, hell yeah.”

Kissing my shoulder, Cooper moved slowly, building the momentum he lost when I started crying. He seemed a little tentative, so I kept saying, “hell yeah” like it felt wonderful. At that point though, my body had shut down and wasn’t feeling much of anything.

Yet emotionally, I felt safe in Cooper’s arms. Pushing himself closer, he was gentle, maybe hoping I might come along with him. As soon as he finished, Cooper turned me to look at him. Sliding his fingers into my hair, he searched my face for something.

“Spend the night with me,” he whispered, still studying my expression.

I said nothing as my mind ran through a million reasons to say no.

“You want to. I can see that on your face. Why aren’t you saying yes?”

“I don’t have anything for an overnight stay.”

Cooper blew his breath up, tossing his bangs out of his eyes. “Dork.”

“Hey, I need stuff. I’m a girl and we’re high maintenance.”

“Whatever you need, I have here.”

“Okay then.”

“You sound excited,” he said, sitting back against the side of the hot tub and stretching out his arms along the edge. “Thrilled.”

Wanting to cross my arms over my chest, I felt like an idiot standing naked before him. Cooper watched me with a hurt expression then another emotion lit up his eyes.

“Fuck, Farah,” he muttered. “Don’t look at me like that.”

He lifted an arm and gestured for me to sit with him. I did immediately, feeling relieved as if I was lost without his approval. I hated the feeling, but it wasn’t something I had power over anymore.

“I was with this girl once,” he said softly as his arm wrapped around me and we slid a little farther into the water. “She was nervous and maybe a virgin. Anyway, she was so tense the first time that she didn’t come. Didn’t seem to do anything except stare at me. It was weird, but then she got drunk and we did it again. The second time, she loved it because she was relaxed. Do you know why I’m telling you about a chick I fucked years ago?”

“To make me feel special?” I teased.

Cooper laughed. “Hell yeah. How could you not?”

Placing a hand on his chest, I smiled up at him. “I feel like maybe your giant brain needs to dumb things down so I can understand.”

Still grinning, Cooper gave me a nod. “That girl was the only time I didn’t win a chick over in the sack. I might irritate girls when our clothes are on, but I’m a stud for a reason. Yet, three times we’ve been together and you didn’t enjoy any of it.”

“I did enjoy it. You weren’t paying attention.”

“I need you to enjoy it more.”

“I’m sorry, but you need to stop being such a giant fucking baby.”

Cooper burst out laughing so hard that he nearly knocked me into the water. Fortunately, he wrapped his arm tighter around my waist and kept from dunking me.

Still grinning, he said, “I want my girl to feel good. Isn’t that a worthy cause to whine about?”

“Yeah, sure, but you ignore all of the good stuff. Like how I’m running around naked in front of you. That’s not me. I’m modest and afraid of being judged and embarrassed. Yet, I’m naked outside because I feel comfortable enough with you. Plus, I’m not letting you have sex with me to be nice. I want to be with you. It’s obvious how I’m messed up and stuff. You should be impressed that I love you enough to want sex even though I get weird about it.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty amazing.”

“Very.”

“You’ll stay tonight, right?” he asked, kissing my neck. “I missed the shit out of you when I left town. Leaving you last night killed me and I stayed for an hour, just willing you to wake up and ask me to spend the night.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. It probably would have freaked you out to wake up drunk with me staring at you.”

“Sexy stalker.”

“Hot bitch.”

“I’ll stay, but I’m not going to lie and say I’m super comfortable with that.”

“Why?”

“Bad breath and other embarrassing stuff.”

“Baby, you’re mine and nothing is going to change that.”

I planned to say something really sexy or profound or likely dumb, but my stomach growled loudly enough to be heard over the hot tub.

Cooper glanced down and frowned. “You need to eat more.”

“It’s all of the food from earlier. It made my body think more was coming.”

“Oh, and it is. Hey, let’s grill. I’ll get a few steaks going and we’ll grill potatoes.

Studying Cooper, I felt a weird sadness rush over me. For a minute, I just watched him then blinked away tears. His smile faded and we stared at each other until I could speak.

“The way you live is pretty amazing to someone like me.”

Nodding, Cooper glanced back at the hills nearby. “See over there,” he asked, pointing to dense woods. When I nodded, he continued, “One day, I’m building my dream house out there. It might seem creepy living that close to my parents, but I figure they can babysit while me and my girl have fun.”

“I’m glad you have your family.”

“You have them too. My mom…” Cooper leaned back and scratched at his stubbled cheek. “I told her about last night. About how you reacted and how I thought you might hate me today. Mom gets how you’re mine and she doesn’t blow it off. You’re mine and that means you’re theirs too.”

Smiling, I nuzzled my lips against the cross on his chest. “It’s not the money,” I said, without looking at him. “You know that, right?”

“I know, baby. You never ask for anything.”

Fortunately, my stomach made a weird noise and drew his attention away from the awkward silence.

“I’ll be back,” Cooper said, standing up in all of his naked glory.

Dumbfounded, I stared wide-eyed. When Cooper noticed my approval, he gave me a wink while walking his fine ass past the pool and into the house.

With him gone, I suddenly felt very naked. Glancing around, I got it into my head that someone could be watching and taking pictures. What if they spread those photos around school and everyone called me a whore? I was nearly ready to panic until I remembered what Skye said about the Johanssons. Would anyone be stupid enough to take pictures of Cooper and me on the Johansson property? Not even stupid. Who would be that suicidal?

I was wondering if Cooper ever killed anyone when he reappeared with a towel wrapped around his waist and a shirt hanging over his arm as he carried out a tray of food and beer.

“Get modest on me?” I asked.

“I figured you might have trouble eating if you were busy drooling.”

“Good point,” I said, stepping out of the hot tub and feeling really really naked.

“You can wear this.”

I slipped Cooper’s tee over my head and it came down far enough to hide my butt. Smiling, I joined him at the patio table where we spread out the food.

“We’ll snack for now. I have the steaks thawing. Is that okay?”

“Perfect,” I said, diving into the plate of pasta salad. “Everything today has been perfect.”

Noticing Cooper watching me, I paused mid-chew.

“You really are happy, aren’t you, baby?”

“Yes,” I said, stroking his shirt and feeling giddy. I’d never imagined I would share anything like this day with anyone, let alone someone as beautiful as Cooper. “Are you happy?”

“If you’re happy, I’m happy. That’s how men are. They like when their women are content.”

“Did your dad tell you that?”

“Oh, yeah. Pop hasn’t stayed married all these years by being a fool.”

Wrapping my arms around my body, I thought back to a girl in high school who wore her boyfriend’s jersey. Seeing her look so proud, Tawny and I never understood what the big deal was, but now I knew. I understood the power of wearing my guy’s shirt and smelling him on me.

“Why do you look sad?” Cooper asked, sitting across from me with a chicken leg in his hand.

“I was thinking about Tawny,” I said, giving him an awkward smile. “I can’t wait to tell her about all this.”

“Wanna call her now?”

“It’s long distance and my phone is at home.”

Cooper gave me a weird frown then glanced around. “Who gives a shit about long distance?”

“I do.”

“Last I checked, you don’t pay my phone bill. Here,” he said, handing over his phone.

“Later. I need to get my thoughts straight first.”

“Must be a girl thing.”

“It is,” I said, setting the phone on the table. “Can we go swimming after we eat?”

“Only if we don’t wait thirty minutes first.”

“Because the thirty minute rule is the man keeping a boot on the back of your neck?”

Cooper grinned. “You can never be too safe.”

Sharing his smile, I finished eating then leaned back and let the food settle.

“Not thirty minutes, but how about like twenty nine?”

“How about ten minutes while I finish off this chicken and admire you in my shirt. It fits you really well.”

When Cooper’s gaze locked on my breasts, I fought the urge to cross my arms and hide them from his hot stare.

“Where were you born?” he asked, still eyeing the part of me now responding to his gaze.

“Near Charlotte. How about you?”

“In the local hospital. Do you have an ideal place you want to live once you’re done with school?”

Grinning at the thought of Cooper ever being a tiny baby, I barely heard his question. “Somewhere quiet would be nice.”

“By quiet, do you mean safe?” When I nodded, Cooper grinned. “For a college town, Ellsberg is very safe. For a Johansson, it’s nearly crime free.”

Smiling, I stood and walked towards the pool. “Is the water cold?”

“Shouldn’t be. Pool’s heated and it’s hot as hell out.”

“Not as hot as earlier in the week. Autumn might finally show up.

Cooper walked up behind me and wrapped me in his arms. “It’s really fucking beautiful around here in the autumn.”

“I look forward to seeing it,” I said dumbly because Cooper had removed his towel and was now descending into the water.

Once he was waist high in the water, Cooper hooked a finger and gestured for me to join him.

“It’s not really been ten minutes.”

“If you cramp or start drowning, I’ll save you.”

Grinning, I pulled off his shirt and walked quickly into the water, finally diving forward and swimming to Cooper. The view underwater was a bit too much to handle and I emerged wide-eyed.

“Already?” I asked, pushing my wet hair back.

Cooper just grinned. “I was a little hard the minute you put on my shirt. Once you took it off, I was done for.”

Shaking my head, I swam past him and to the deep end. As Cooper watched me swim back and forth, he wore the intense gaze like when he first visited Denny’s. I both loved and feared that gaze. Finally, I swam up to him.

“You’re so needy,” I teased.

“And you’re everything.”

Startled by the intensity behind the words, I remained silent. Running my fingers over his chest, I caressed his nipples and Cooper exhaled hard.

“Not even an option now,” he said, wrapping me in his arms. “If you say no, I’ll fucking cry.”

“Yes, I often horny up guys I plan to reject.”

Cooper smiled before kissing me hungrily. I felt nearly swallowed up by his need then he reached out and grabbed an inner tube floating by. It was the kind where a person leaned back into it and relaxed under an umbrella while the rest of them remained underwater. Except Cooper had plans for the rest of me.

Lifting my legs gently, he caressed my knees then leaned down and kissed where his fingers had been. The soft lingering kisses making me squirm, his lips moved upward and I panicked a little. Trying to close my legs, I noticed Cooper stop and frown as his lips found my inner right thigh. I avoided his confused gaze, instead staring up at the clear sky.

Cooper took the hint and moved his affection to my stomach, giving my belly button a lick. “An outie,” he said, grinning.

Smiling too, I was relieved he wasn’t forcing the issue. Relaxing my legs around him, I watched Cooper explore. At first, I thought he was just amazingly thorough then I realized he was testing me. So he was amazing and perceptive.

Cooper soon learned what I had discovered an hour earlier. I had very sensitive nipples. They and Cooper shared a long make out session. By the end, they were his slaves. Grinning as if knowing he’d won them over, Cooper kissed me tenderly.