Dark Love (The Two Sides of Me Book 3) (29 page)

Evan and I are on a boat at sea, I am very pregnant and the crazy smoke lady from the hospital in Italy is there sitting in a deck chair staring at me as I dangle my feet over the edge of the boat with a fishing pole in my hands. Evan is there somewhere, but I can’t see him I only feel his presence. I look back at the smoke lady periodically to see what she’s doing, and it’s always the same, nothing, she just stares at me blankly as if I weren’t actually there, she looks right through me and out into the water. A storm kicks up, and dark black smoke begins to billow from the cabin where I believe Evan to be. I try to get up, but it’s difficult with a rocking boat underneath me and an enormous belly to maneuver. The smell of smoke is so strong I cough and gag when the crazy smoke lady appears behind me looping her arms undermine to drag me across the deck away from the cabin and the increasing smoke. Then things change, it feels normal within the dream but thinking about it now I know it’s insane, smoke lady and I are walking through a corn field and every time I look back I see Evan standing there looking forlorn and alone, but it’s not concerning at the time until we reach the edge of the field and I know somehow that if I step out of the corn I will never see him again.

“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours this morning?” Evan scoots closer to me in bed sliding his hand over my thigh under the covers.

“A weird dream that’s all.” Propping up on his elbow his sleep dazed face clouds with concern.

“Dream or nightmare?” he asks

“Dream, what happened to your mind reading skills?”

“I just woke up, give me a few minutes, tell me about your dream.”

“It’s nothing just a bunch of jumbled up bits that don’t mean a thing.” I smile at him, it’s not a lie, I don’t understand the dream, but it does make me feel unsettled.

“How long have you been sitting there thinking?”

“Not long, maybe half an hour,” my stomach growls loudly and nausea sets up shop causing my mouth to water warning me of a vomit filled morning if I don’t eat something quick.

“My wife and children need breakfast.” I shake my head still bewildered by the sound of the words
wife and children;
it’s just so…mind boggling! There it is again ugh…

“I need something to be sick in if you don’t want me getting out of bed.” And like lightning he snaps into action bolting to the bathroom and returning with a small trash can. I grab it just in time to wretch absolutely nothing over and over as Evan holds my hair and murmurs something about never wanting to be a nurse. When it’s over, I look at him over the trash with watery eyes a runny nose and probably the worst morning breath imaginable.

“I love you?” he says shrugging

“I hope so, this isn’t my finest hour.” He kisses me on the top of my head and disappears into the bathroom again.

“Are you going to be needing this again?” He calls out

“I dunno, hope not.”

“I’m going to get you some breakfast; do you need to use the bathroom?”

“Yea, like yesterday.” After being scooped up delivered to the bathroom, allowed to sit on the toilet to brush my teeth and deposited back into bed he dresses in a pair of extremely well-tailored jeans and a tight fitted black t-shirt that strains against his lean, athletic body. How can he make jeans and a fucking t-shirt look so good? I sit still in my pajamas with my chin resting on my knees arms wrapped tight around my legs admiring the view, and he catches me.

We exchange knowing smiles, his a smirk and a wink, mine mischievous. “You’re not allowed to look that good until I can fuck you again, Mr. Lawson.” His surprised look is priceless; he’s all mouth hanging open and wide-eyed.

“You’re going to have to watch that foul mouth of yours in a few months, you know? I think the hormones are making it worse.”

“I think it’s the thought of being sexually frustrated for weeks not so much the hormones.”

“Oh, don’t you worry, I’ll be taking care of you and your needs, this won’t be as bad as you think.” He wiggles his eyebrows, and I’m laughing again burying my face into my knees. I hear him pad across the room to me and his hand brushing my hair away from my face. When I raise my head, he is directly in front of me, reaching out he cradles my face in his hands.

“I love hearing you laugh; it’s music to my ears I want you to be this happy and carefree every single day of your life.” I lean my face into one of his hands.

“Well, I would love that too but I have a feeling there will be more than a few days where you will be hearing me scream and cry while trying to figure out how to mother two kids at once.”

“I’ll be helping you, always Mia, I will be right here next to you.”

“Thank God.” I sigh.

“How about I start now with breakfast?”

“Good idea I think I’d rather puke food than bile.” He drops his hands and wrinkles his nose.

“On that note I’ll be in the kitchen, be good. You have everything right? iPad, phone, TV remote?”

“Yes, yes and yes.” He points his long finger at me and then at the bed.

“You. Stay.”

“I will! Go get me food!”

“Don’t you mean please get me some food?” Oh that’s rich,
he
is asking
me
to say please, Mr. no manners mc gee, but I’ve already earned three points of disapproval and I still haven’t figured out his form of retaliation, so I comply.

“
Please
get me some food.” Looking smug he leaves me alone with my nausea and two lazy kitties sleeping peacefully and undisturbed by our banter, lucky furballs…

Breakfast really helped I feel so much better after a couple of eggs and ginger tea, now if I can just keep it all down there until lunch. Evan brought his work into bed so I wouldn’t be lonely; laptop, files, papers, and notebooks are all around him on the bed in strangely neat piles.

I’ve been dressed in a large baggy off the shoulder cable knit sweater and nothing else. Evan offered black leggings, but I figured what for? I’m not getting out of bed today I only put on the sweater to appease him, he says being dressed will make me feel normal, ha! I think it’s safe to say normal went out the window months ago. I’ve been sitting around in hospital rooms and at Evan’s bedside for so long you would think I’d be used to it but I’m going stir crazy today with so many things swimming around in my head that need to be done. And I’m home! I want to visit my family and friends, go to the Seattle glass blowing studio, take a swim, run on the treadmill, go shopping, make wedding plans, baby plans, ugh! The more I think about getting out of bed, the more anxious I become, bouncing my foot and fidgeting in my spot trying to get comfortable earns me a comment.

“You should read, or online shop,
” Evan says without raising his eyes from the screen of his laptop.

“I hate being in bed,” I whine

“Now that simply is not true, you love being in bed with me.” I roll my eyes

“Yea when we are naked, and sweaty going at it like animals, not dressed and working.” He chuckles and selects a file to hand to me.

“Here, you can work on wedding plans and I will get you naked later, deal?” That idea is downright appealing, and he’s right, I may be stuck here in bed, but I can still get a lot of things done with a computer and a phone.

“Deal.” I accept his offer and the file, curious on both accounts, what’s he got planned for later and what all has he done with the wedding plans already? I open the file, and there are invoices for flowers that have been ordered, rental chairs and tables, glass wear, a menu, has he left anything up to me?

“You’ve been a busy bee, haven’t you? Were you planning on letting me make any decisions about our wedding?”

“Of course, you can cancel or change anything you don’t like, and I have not had time to look into music or entertainment. You also need a gown and dresses for your bridesmaids, who are you going to have stand up with you?”

Wow, he’s really been giving this a lot of thought. I shuffle through the papers looking at the dates of the orders and wonder when our wedding day is, this is a side of Evan I haven’t been exposed to, the hyper-organized efficient side and it’s making me feel a little inadequate.

“Uh I hadn’t thought about it I guess I mean it should be my sister but I feel like Gabriella should be my maid of honor too.”

“Just do both, I’ll have your brother in law, Simone, Isaac and Saint so pick two more. Oh and how about your niece and nephew for ring bearer and flower girl?”

“Sure.” I close the folder and push it back toward him on the bed, I’m suddenly feeling unneeded; maybe I should just let him handle the whole thing.

He closes his laptop and stacks his work neatly on top of it, placing it on his night table. He crawls across the ridiculously big bed and settles himself behind me circling my body with his legs. He gathers my loose heavy hair moving it to one shoulder, a shiver races over my skin when he nibbles on my neck and cups my sensitive breasts in his hands.

“I like to plan things. I like to be in control but I don’t want you to feel left out so if that is what you are thinking, and I know it is, don’t worry there will be a million details to share I promise. I did, however, choose a date, I had to so things could be reserved, we are getting married on March 12th, is that ok with you?”

“Well it doesn’t make much difference now does it, you've chosen the date. Anything special about March 12th?”

“It’s a nice number, even, nearly half way through the month and most importantly soon.”

“Even, huh?”

“Yes, I like balance.”

“Balance?” Now I’m just teasing him.

“Yes,
balance, are you going to keep repeating me?”

“Repeating, who’s repeating?”

“I do believe the lady is looking for number four.”

“Four is an even number, balanced, I couldn’t just have three punishments could I?” Oh man, I’m gonna get it for that one!

“At this rate you will be well past four punishments but yes now that you mention it, four is nice.” I feel his hands wandering under my sweater, his skilled fingers feathering over my hard incredibly sensitive nipples and down between my bare legs he smooths them along the inside and then slowly along the outside of my thighs. Later has turned into now and I couldn’t be happier or more ready
.

“I could begin punishing you now, you know?” I’ve dropped my head back onto his shoulder letting him explore my body with abandon, my hands are flat on the mattress gripping the sheets, I don’t want to wait until later to get naked with him but as a curiosity junkie I have to ask.

“How,” I whisper

“By withholding.” My neck snaps up, and my eyes fly open.

“You wouldn’t!”

“Ah yes, I would.” His hands abandon my heated flesh, and he’s out from behind me and off the bed in seconds.

“I. Can. Not. Believe. You!” I yell at him as he retreats from the room walking backward, smiling, taunting and then him finishing me off by
smirking
and
winking
agh!!!

“Don’t mess with the boss, baby.” I pound my fists into the mattress making him smile broader before he turns leaving me hot, frustrated and pissed off! Fuck he’s infuriating!

I slam my hand down again and hit the wedding folder when an idea hits me, probably a bad one but in this moment the need for revenge runs like a raging river through my veins. I flip it open and grab my phone; this ought to scramble his balanced even ideas all to hell. I start with the florist dialing the number and efficiently changing every single flower on his list, the color, the amount even the type we are now having a wedding with orange and yellow lilies with Gerber daisies and sprigs of fern! Ha! A far cry from his lovely lavender and cream arrangements of roses, peonies, and orchids. I even threw in a couple blue carnations, the lady at the shop tried to change my mind, and she probably thinks I
’
m crazy, and I am…I
’
m crazy mad! Onto the next invoice, the cake oh yea this is gonna be good!

Two hours later, I’ve almost completely obliterated every single plan he’s carefully and meticulously made when my bladder is screaming, and I can’t stand to hold it anymore. Stacking the papers neatly back into the folder I place it on the bed and send Evan a text
I’m getting out of bed, have to pee.
I’ve no more than hit send when I hear him holler