Dark Promises (Dark #29) (14 page)

She cleared her throat. “I would like to put clothes on.”

He knew she felt vulnerable. She was naked, and he liked her that way. He liked that he could just reach out and sink his fingers into her. That he could put his mouth on her. Taste her. Have her. He decided on strict honesty, although he was fairly certain she would be more afraid of him than ever.

“You need to get used to this. I like you naked. I like to look at your body and touch you. I like your skin touching mine.” He wanted access to
her body whenever he wanted her—however he wanted her. She was going to have to get used to the fact that his cock wasn't letting up. Not after having her twice. “You are safe right here. Just talk to me. If I did not hurt you, why are you crying these tears?”

She moistened her lips and made an effort to stop the tears. “I'm afraid of you.”

“I know. You will learn, in time, you are safe. In the meantime it will not hurt you to fear me a little. You can be assured I can keep you protected from any harm that comes your way.”

She swallowed. “I don't want to make you angry. You want honesty from me and I really want to give you that, Aleksei, but there are things I can't talk about.”

“This man.”

She bit her lip hard.

He caught her chin and turned her face up to his. “Stop that.” He leaned down and licked at the small wound there. “Your body belongs to me. I do not want you injuring it, especially that beautiful mouth. That lower lip is tempting and one of these times, when you bite it, I will take over and do that for you.”

Her body shivered, responding to his low, sensual tone. She started to bite her lip again and hastily stopped herself.

“Tell me what you are feeling.”

She took a breath. Let it out. Her fingers twisted together and her gaze found his again and dropped away. “None of this makes any sense to me. I don't understand how I can have feel . . .” She broke off abruptly with a small sob before catching herself. “Feelings for him and yet you responded to me.” He kept his gaze steady on hers.

She nodded. “What does that say about me? I must be a terrible person. I want you. Your body. Your voice. Everything you do or say makes me respond to you, but my feelings, my heart . . .”

He swept back her hair and studied her face. Her expression. Her eyes. She wasn't making it up. In fact, she was finding it difficult to tell him. This wasn't a bid for sympathy. She looked miserable. Horrified even. Totally confused. And that confused him. She really didn't know what was
happening to her. How could a Carpathian woman not understand the powerful ties between lifemates?

She shook her head, choking back a sob, rocking back and forth. “What's wrong with me? How can my own body betray me like that?”

His teeth snapped together in a hard bite. His sympathy was gone that fast. Her body
betrayed
her? “I. Do.
Not.
Think. So.” His voice was pitched low. But it thundered through her body as it was meant to do. She winced back and bit her lip hard. Even that wasn't going to get her out of trouble.

His hand whipped out and he bunched that long hair in his fist, pulling her head back before she could hide her face from him.

“You understand something, Gabrielle. Get this straight.
You
betrayed
me
. Your body belongs to
me
. Not him. Your body knows what it is doing. You, however, do not, but you had better learn fast or you are going to find your life is miserable until you do. You owe me allegiance. I gave you every chance to live your life without me, but you chose. You
chose
. I told you there would be no going back. You cannot survive without me now, nor I you. So learn this now. You belong to me. Your body. Your heart. Your soul and that treacherous, betraying mind of yours.”

Gabrielle flinched with every blow he dealt her. It felt as if he'd punched her repeatedly over and over, right in her gut. She was grateful her knees were drawn up tightly or she would have doubled over. As it was, she felt bile rise. Her body had betrayed her. At the same time he was right. He was
right
about her. She wasn't worth anything at all. She was disloyal to Gary. Her beloved Gary. Gary, who represented all things human. He represented kindness and security. She wasn't ready to throw that comfort away and embrace this wild, rough man who demanded not only her allegiance, but her body, soul, heart and mind. Everything. He would take everything away from her.

She was already stripped bare. He despised her. She was terrified of him and the life they would lead together. There was nowhere to go. Nowhere to run. She knew she was tied to him, and not just through their blood-bond and their soul-bond. She knew she wouldn't be able to go long without feeling his body inside of her. His mouth on her. She would burn for him. She was addicted to his taste. To his touch. To his cock.

She covered her face with her hands and wept, uncaring if he saw her
or not. She was lost. So incredibly lost. Was it possible for her to meet the dawn without harming him? For a moment, that seemed the only answer.

His hands pulled hers down and he looked at her face. She knew the moment his green eyes went dark that he saw what she was thinking. He didn't enter her mind and she was grateful for that, but he looked more terrifying than ever.

“You will not even consider such a thing.”

There was no trying to look innocent and she'd promised him the truth. So let him hear it. “I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I've never been with a man. I know nothing of lifemates . . .”

“What family would not teach their daughter about lifemates?” Skepticism was in his voice.

“I
told
you. I am
human
.
Was
human,” she corrected. Hadn't she told him? He had been so frightening. So out of control. It was possible he hadn't heard her. She couldn't remember what had been said or not said. “I was stabbed repeatedly by members of a human society who hunt vampires and I nearly died. I guess I did die and was reborn Carpathian. I don't know why they targeted me. But Mikhail, the prince of the Carpathian people, converted me.”

Aleksei looked at her, his eyes burning right through her, but she couldn't tell from his expression if he believed her. Still, she plowed on.

“I'm psychic, from a family of psychics, and in case it is news to you, psychics can be converted without fear they will go mad. My sister is lifemate to a Carpathian. I don't know what I'm doing. I can't take blood by myself. I can't sleep in the ground, and I don't know anything at all about lifemates.”

She lifted her chin and glared at him defiantly. “You got yourself a real bargain. I don't know the first thing about being your lifemate. I don't know how to be Carpathian, and I've loved Gary for a very long time. So not only did I inadvertently betray you, I betrayed him and I betrayed myself. So don't think you're all alone in this mess I've made. I pretty much screwed everyone.”

There. She'd told him her sad tale and hoped he believed her because she wasn't going to repeat herself
again
. He might as well know the worst about her.

Aleksei stared at her for so long she was afraid she might just scream.
There was absolute silence inside the four walls. Not even a whisper of movement. He was that still. A predator watching her, wholly focused on her. A cold chill crept down her spine. Her heart slammed hard and began to accelerate. Her blood went cold.

“This man you say you love. He is a Daratrazanoff.
He
knew better.”

She knew in that moment that he would hunt down Gary and kill him. It was there in his eyes. That dark green that glittered with menace and ruthless intent. Aleksei really was part savage, as untamed as any of the wildest predatory animals roaming the earth. He was going to kill Gary, and she was certain he had the knowledge and skill to do it in spite of all the knowledge Gary had acquired when they converted him.

Gabrielle shook her head. “He wasn't. He was human, too. He became friends with Gregori Daratrazanoff.” She swept a hand through her hair, suddenly exhausted, so tired she could barely lift her hand. She didn't want to do this. “This isn't Gary's fault. We had feelings for each other before we were converted. I had no comprehension of being someone's lifemate or what that would entail.”

“Your sister is a lifemate to someone and she was human like you.” The words were a low accusation.

She was intelligent. She had known. She hadn't wanted to know, but deep down, where she was good at hiding from herself, she had known there was the possibility. She'd just convinced herself it wouldn't happen because she was too afraid. She didn't want someone to consume her. She didn't want that side of her nature she kept hidden, she repressed and pushed away, ever coming out—like he had brought out in her.

She moaned softly in despair. There was no going back. He wouldn't let her. She knew that, she knew by his implacable expression and the hardness in his green gaze. He had said she was wild. That she matched him. She didn't want that. She was afraid of who she was. What lengths would she go to? He would rule her life if she allowed it and she was very, very afraid she would if she didn't find the courage to fight him.

“You will forget this man, Gabrielle. If you do not, I will kill him. You do not know me, so you cannot know I do not make idle threats. He has no right to any part of you and I refuse to share you with him.”

“I would hate you forever if you killed him,” she whispered.

His hand tightened in her hair, forcing her to stare into his eyes. “If this man is in your mind and heart, there is no room for me,” he said. “You gave yourself to me.
All
of you. Are you a woman of your word?”

She wanted to be. She moistened her lips. She knew he was telling her she had to let go of Gary, but he didn't understand it was so much more than that.

“Say it,” he snapped, his fingers tightening in warning. “If you are not honest with me, I will take your mind and see to every corner of it and sweep this man away myself. I am giving you this concession. Talk to me honestly even if you know it will make me angry. If you do not, I will not ask again.”

“I know I did something wrong,” she said, unable to contain her rising temper. “I tried to make up for it. Punish me if that makes you feel any better. I don't know what else I can do. If I give him up completely, I've lost everything I was. Everything I am. Everything human. I'll be so lost I won't know how to get back to me.” The stark truth burst out of her before she could sort through her desperate thoughts.

Again he just watched her. Forever. For what seemed an eternity. Abruptly, still holding her hair, he pulled her head back farther and leaned into her, taking her mouth. She kept her mouth closed. She was determined that he wouldn't have any more of her right then. She was too vulnerable. Too exposed. Too fragile. One more blow and she might not survive. She didn't want to know that her body was already his. She just wanted to be numb and not think about anything at all. Not ever again.

She turned her face to the side but he clamped his hand around her jaw, holding her face toward his.

“
Kessake
, you cannot be afraid you will lose yourself. I can always find you. I will always find you no matter how lost you are. You put yourself into my keeping, and I may be rough and half savage, but you do not have to fear these things. I will see to your happiness. I will cherish you and protect you.”

His lips brushed over hers gently, almost tenderly, and her eyes burned with tears all over again. How could he be so sweet one moment and so frightening the next? She was just so tired.

“I will teach you the things you fear. You are intelligent, Gabrielle. You know information is power. You fear what you do not know. You will grow
powerful and skilled in the ways of our people. That will not lessen who you are or who you were, only enhance it.”

She pressed her forehead to his. “You're making sense and that scares me a little,” she admitted. She lifted her head. “How? How do I do what you ask?”

“You have no choice,
kessake
, because I have no choice. I cannot share you with another man. I will not. No other man touches you.”

“I know that,” she said. “I wouldn't betray you like that. Not even with him.” And she wouldn't. She'd given her word, and truthfully, she wasn't certain any other man would ever satisfy her. Worse, she wasn't certain she could allow another man to touch her, not even Gary.

“I want all of you.”

It was a demand, and it said everything about him. He was ruthless. Arrogant. He would kill. He had killed. He was hard and scary and everything that Gary was not. She let her breath out slowly and closed her eyes.

Gary.
She breathed his name with regret. With sorrow.
I'm so sorry.
She was sorry. For everything, but mostly because she already belonged to Aleksei. Maybe not her heart, but she had chosen and she would stick with that choice, no matter how terrified she was.

She didn't know how to let Gary go, but she was going to try. Gary wouldn't feel the sorrow she did. She knew the love he had for her would barely be a memory to him if Gregori and Mikhail had managed to save him—and she was certain they had. She would have known if he was gone.

She breathed her good-bye and took another breath. When she opened her eyes, she found herself staring into Aleksei's brilliant green eyes. He didn't blink. He refused to release her gaze.

“Are you letting him go?”

She nodded her head slowly.

“Kiss me.”

She pulled back a little, or tried to. She'd forgotten his hand in her hair. That said how gentle he'd been with her, but now she felt the bite of demand on her scalp. She licked her lips with the tip of her tongue. She wasn't ready for this. “Aleksei.” She whispered his name, asking for mercy. Willing him to understand.