Darkest Before Dawn (13 page)

“You still have Ryder’s cellphone. He turned the GPS app on before giving it to you.” Stefan caught my scowl. “He knew you were in trouble. He cares about you.”

As we sped through the nighttime streets of Boston, I struggled to tear my gaze from Stefan. The light from the streetlights broke over his face. He appeared leaner somehow, unforgiving, refined. His eyes captured the light, fractured it, and splintered the color in his irises; aquamarine, amethyst, and sapphire. His eyes mirrored the colors of the veil.

After just a few minutes of white-knuckle driving, Stefan swung the car off the main stretch, bumped it up a curb, and stomped on the brakes. He flung open the door and jumped out. Did he always park cars like he’d stolen them? He tugged open my door, snatched my hand, and tugged me out. I yelped. “Hey—”

“Come with me.” Eyes bright in the pseudo-dark of the city and breathing hard, he tugged me after him.

We passed through a gate into a leafy city park and climbed a dirt path to the top of a knoll. He released my hand as we crested the top. From our vantage point, the parkland sloped down to the water’s edge. A glorious view of Boston Harbor sparkled in the distance. Beyond the inky strip of water some distance away, the high-rise buildings of the financial district glistened.

“Watch.” Stefan descended between avenues of trees. An icy breeze whispered against my cheeks and kissed my lips. I smiled and pulled my coat tighter around me, wincing as my dozen or so cuts protested. It was beautiful, serene, an island of calm amidst the madness of my life.

Stefan lifted his arms, fingers rigid, coat rippling behind him as he walked. A carpet of ice bloomed beneath each step. Ice-strikes scattered and sparked in every direction, flooding the ground in white. Ice climbed trees, scampered up near-naked branches, and burst from their tips like crystal flowers. Snowflakes dallied in the air, but the sky was clear. They blinked into existence and danced around their master. He turned the world to winter with his every step and didn’t look back. It was utterly surreal and completely spellbinding.

I ventured down the hill, almost falling on my ass too many times to count. Around me, the ice groaned, cracked, chimed, and sighed, drowning out the distant sounds of Boston. I shivered, teeth chattering, and summoned what heat I could find to fight the worst of the cold from my flesh.

Trees bowed over, weighed down by climbing vines of ice. Rime clawed at my boots. I had to pool more heat into my feet to keep it at bay. Stefan’s ice was hungry, needy, like a living thing.

He reached the bay’s edge at the bottom of a frozen avenue of trees. Ice gobbled up the black harbor waters ahead of him, only stopping its feast when he turned and smiled over his shoulder. I slipped, stumbled, somehow managed to stay upright, and cursed. One of his eyebrows arched. I scowled. “Hey, fire demon, okay? Ice messes with my chi.”

He turned in a flurry of red coat and jogged back to me. “Well... C’mon... What do you think? You’re impressed?”

“It’s er...” I skipped my gaze over the avenue of ice while snowflakes landed on my lashes. Vapor rolled skyward, swirling and writhing higher to meet the flakes falling from a cloudless sky. The bitterly cold air tasted like minerals. He’d turned the park into a picture postcard of the netherworld. “It’s stunning.”
Like him.

He gripped my shoulders, startling a tiny gasp from my lips. “You told me what it was like. You said you’d never give up your demon, that she’s a part of who you are. I thought you were nuts.”

His enthusiasm fixed a genuine smile on my face. “Gee, thanks.”

“But I get it now.” His grip tightened. “The Institute tethered me.”

“Listen, about that... I know some things about Adam you should probably hear.”

He cut me off with a sharp glare. “Not now.” He pressed a cool finger to my lips. “Later.” He stilled. Doubt, or maybe hesitation, crossed his face. Before I could discern which, he clamped my face in both hands. His boreal eyes shone, and for a breathless moment, I thought he’d kiss me. He didn’t. He closed his eyes and eased his ethereal touch into me.

My demon snapped to attention. She flung herself into my flesh, staggering me with enough wanton energy that for the briefest of moments, I utterly lost my mind. Like lightening in the dark, power jolted through me. I sucked in a sharp gasp. Fire broke over my skin. My element surged, knocking my humanity aside in its rush to meet this new, overflowing source of energy.

I tugged back and severed Stefan’s contact. The power he’d shared shut down, leaving me breathless and disoriented. “Holy hell, Stefan.” I licked my lips. “You’re like...”
Like the sensation I get reaching through the veil and tapping into the great reservoir of energy in the netherworld.
He felt like raw chaos. My demon wanted to roll over at his feet. It was unnerving and deeply erotic. Raw chaos standing within reach, all wrapped up in Stefan, ready to be undone. Words failed me. It was too surreal, too impossible. Too demon.

I backed up, not trusting my own thoughts or his. “This is all... great, but Levi and Akil will be looking for us, and you’ve just painted the park in ice, so y’know, we’re not exactly hard to find. I need to get to Dawn. I promised I would keep her safe. She’s a half blood girl, and she...” He stood frozen still. “She...”

His wings snapped into existence, elaborate flourishes of ice arching either side of him. They were huge and damned distracting, especially since they sang like distant bells. I gawked. I couldn’t help it. His wings always rendered me speechless.

“Call your demon, Muse.” His voice dropped to demon-tones, rich, dark, and dangerous. My own darker-half did an odd little trill inside my head, further distracting me. I was having a hard time remembering my own name, let alone the fact we were meant to be running away from immortal bad guys.

I suspected if I did summon my demon, I’d be seeing more of Stefan than his fantastical wings, and I wouldn’t have a hope in hell’s chance of controlling my dark half. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.” Look at me, the sensible one. What was the world coming to?

His lips quirked. He flicked his wrist and produced a blade of ice.

I hiked an eyebrow up. “So what is this? Suddenly you’re getting all pissy again. Why? Because I won’t play?”

He moved as quickly as Akil ever has and hooked an arm around my waist, pulling me against him. “We’ve got some crap to work out,” he whispered against my cheek.

I turned my head. His lips brushed mine. A rising tide of need warmed me through. It would be easy to let go, to forget it all and throw my arms around his neck and drag him into a kiss. Dawn was out there. She needed me. Whatever this was, it wasn’t helping anyone. I knew one way of ending our dance. Mention of a single name should do it. “Like you not believing me when I tell you I didn’t go to the netherworld to save Akil? I’m not involved with him.”

His grip tightened. “Lies, I can smell him on you.”

“I’ve never lied to you.” A growl underscored my words just enough to add a threat. “And I never will. I know what lies can do. Believe me or don’t. It’s the truth. The same as when I tell you I didn’t mean to hurt you, or Nica.”

He pressed the tip of the ice-sword under my chin. If it wasn’t for the glimmer of humor sparkling in his eyes, I might have readied myself for the attack. “Words are cheap.”

“You sound like Akil.”

He bristled and pulled back, but the smile stayed. “Maybe I have reason to. Summon your demon, Muse. We’re alone.” He backed away. “You promised me a wild ride when you got your demon back, or was that a lie as well?”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “Back at the lake house, when you lost control, would you have hurt me?”

“I didn’t mean for that to happen. I was... I just want to be free.” He held out a hand. “Join me, just for a little while? C’mon, where’s the fun in being different if we can’t enjoy it?”

When he asked like that, I couldn’t very well say no. “Oh, for hell’s sake.” I readied my stance in the snow and summoned my demon. She broke over me, enveloped my humanity in coal-black armored skin, and peered through my eyes at the ice-king before us. He’d shrugged off his humanity, clothes and all. Holy hell. He was nothing short of an angel, a deadly, razor-edged, diamond-eyed angel framed by wings of shattered crystal. Looking upon his true form, I had to wonder if he was ever meant to be a part of this world. He was clearly netherworldly, right down to the intricate fractals swirling beneath his skin. A curious chattering rattled through my teeth, the sound purely demon and one I had no hope of curbing.

“You want to fight it out? Fine.” I didn’t have a hope of beating him. He had more power rolling off of him than Akil. I unfurled my ragged wing and gave it a flick. Frankly, next to him, I looked like something that ought to be put out to pasture and shot. “Winner gets—” I flung a blast of fire at his face, turned on my heel, and darted toward the nearest frozen tree.

He snapped into existence in front of me, moving too fast for my eyes to track. I gasped, jerked back, and skidded, somehow managing to stay upright, but it wasn’t pretty. He hunkered down and rolled the ice-sword in his hand. The glint of mischief in his eyes tugged a broad fang-filled smile across my lips. Backing up, I called to the slumbering city heat. It rushed into my body, burning away my doubts. Laughter peeled from my lips. I spun heat and energy around my arm and threw it over my skin, igniting a shield of fire. “Take your best shot, Frosty.” Spreading my arms, I reveled in the embrace of my element.

He straightened, and took a few strides toward me. A short sharp jab stung me in the right butt cheek. I jumped. “Ow!” Ice daggers hovered in the air around me. He had all the fancy tricks. I flung my arms out, releasing a blast of heat in all directions, instantly melting his brittle daggers.

He summoned more with a chuckle. I swatted those like flies. We danced, his ice and my fire. After a while, I forgot the little girl I was meant to be saving and the princes, who by then had to be hunting us. I didn’t care that cracking ice and raging fire would attract unwanted attention. I was lost in the freedom of the demon, riding by her side and happy to neglect reality while I played. Our game of fire and ice was a rollercoaster I had no control over. At some point, the moments blurred into a stream of motion and sensation. As demon, I knew only the thrill of the hunt, the chase, the capture, the wild and breathless anticipation. It was glorious, but in the clash of chaos, the threads of my tentative control unraveled.

We were laughing, teasing, snapping and growling like wolves at play: deadly, yet tamed. Ice rained, and flames spiraled around us. I was demon and free.

A wave of ice splinters rolled across the ground. My snarl quickly turned to laughter. He lunged. So did I. We clashed in a shower of opposing elemental sparks. “Freedom...” He panted. “Feels good, doesn’t it.”

I surged my element into him, seeking out the well of power at his center. He hissed as though burned and faltered, falling away from me. I had a few tricks up my sleeves too. I strode closer. He backed away. I pushed in deeper, seeking, reaching, entwining. He snarled and slammed into me. We tumbled to the ground in a panting, sizzling tangle, sprawled like spent lovers.

“What did you just do?” he asked, dragging his gaze along my thigh, down the concave of my waist, and over the rise of my breasts.

I felt his appraisal like a cool breeze across my hot demon skin, and an electric sizzle of power strummed through me, fluttering desire low in my abdomen. If he didn’t notice the physical change in my demon body, he’d sense it. “Maybe I’ll teach you sometime if you teach me how to control fire like you control ice.”

He shook crushed ice from his hair. “I’d like to.” His eyes turned serious as he reached a hand up and placed it carefully over my heart. His all-demon cool blue touch fizzled against my fire-veined skin. He sucked in a breath and toned down his own power, then gently eased his element through me, into the darkness slumbering at my core. I knew what he sensed as soon as I saw his handsome face cut into a scowl: Damien, my unwanted hitchhiker.

Stefan shrugged his demon off in one graceful roll of his shoulders. He was just Stefan again. Fully clothed, virtually normal but for the cerulean glare. I dropped my head back on the frozen earth and closed my eyes. My demon sauntered off to the back of my mind, dumping me back into human flesh. My clothes scratched against my skin, heavy and restricting. A small part of me pined for the freedom again.
Just let go...

“It’s the soul-lock you feel. When I stabbed and burned Damien, he didn’t die. He made himself a new home in me.” The words made it sound so simple. Nightmarish memories broiled.

Eyes still closed, I concentrated on the warmth of Stefan’s hand resting on my chest. “I... didn’t realize,” he said. “That day was...” He didn’t need to say it. I knew exactly what that day had been. I relived it constantly in my dreams.

“He lives in me. Every breath, every heartbeat, I share with him.” I hadn’t told anyone. Damien was my dirty secret. When I finally opened my eyes, I found Stefan watching me with a curious muddle of emotions on his face. Confusion, definitely. There was sympathy too.

“That’s why you need Akil,” he said softly.

“Yeah, Akil can fix me. But it’s not that simple. I don’t trust him. Part of me thinks he would take Damien’s place. He’s never said he wouldn’t.” The words began to flow easier now. It felt good to finally breath life into the fears I’d harbored for so long, as though sharing the horror relieved some of the burden. Is this what it felt like to have a friend? Someone I could share my secrets with? Someone who would listen without demanding something of me in return?

“You’re right. Akil will take Damien’s place if you let him. He’s all demon. He wants you. He wouldn’t let a little thing like free will get in his way.” Stefan put on an alarmingly similar portrayal of Akil, right down to the netherworldly accent, “
It’s too late, Muse. It is done, you must get over it
.”

I laughed and punched Stefan on the shoulder. This really wasn’t funny, and yet, with Stefan, I almost felt as though it could be. He chuckled dryly, but his light laughter faded as his gaze fell to his hand resting over my heart. An unhurried quiet fell over us. His hand rose and fell with the rhythm of my breathing, and I recalled when we’d last lain that close, lost in one another, as though nothing could ever tear us apart. How wrong I’d been.