Authors: Brenda Novak
“Why Pickwick?” he asked. “You always camp there.”
Kennedy shrugged. “This is sort of a last-minute trip.”
“If you’re willing to go to Arkabutla instead, I’ll go with you.”
Joe loved to hunt and fish more than anyone Kennedy knew. And since all the other guys were married, he was forever searching for ways to entertain himself. But Kennedy had no intention of inviting Joe. After the pizza parlor incident, he could only imagine how happy Grace would be if Joe tagged along. “Maybe next time.”
Buzz glanced at his watch. “We’d better get going. Sarah will be mad if we’re late.”
Kennedy thumped the door panel. “Have fun tonight. Tell Sarah and the kids I said hello.”
“Will do.”
“Don’t break Melinda’s heart, okay, Joe?” he added.
“Me?” Joe’s smile hitched up on one side. “Come on, I’m too nice a guy for that.”
Kennedy laughed as they drove off, but sighed in relief once they were gone. The last thing he needed was for Joe to find out that he and Grace were spending the weekend together and start running his big mouth.
Waiting for Kennedy and his boys, Grace twirled her rings around and around her fingers. Madeline had called wanting to come by last night, but Grace had complained of a headache and said she was going to bed. She didn’t want to see her stepsister and pretend she didn’t find anything at Jed’s when she couldn’t say with certainty whether or not that Bible
would reappear and reveal her for the liar she was. She didn’t want to talk to her mother, either. Feeling the way she did, she couldn’t pretend she wasn’t worried about the future, and knew she’d only upset Irene. With all that, and the whole town speculating as to why Madeline had broken into Jed’s shop, Grace was actually glad she’d be out of town for the next few days.
Even if it was with Kennedy Archer.
She rubbed her forehead, wondering what the two of them would talk about. Back in high school, she’d stared longingly after him as he’d walked down the halls, or watched from the corner of the room as he’d slung an arm around Raelynn’s shoulders, wishing, dreaming, that it could be her. But he’d barely acknowledged her existence. And since she’d returned to town, he’d caught her throwing up in the bathroom of the pizza parlor and fleeing the scene of a crime. Not impressive—and not much on which to build a friendship.
Teddy would be there, though. That boy had captured her heart. Maybe it was how sweet he was and how bright for someone so young. She’d never met a more loving child. As far as Grace was concerned, Kennedy didn’t deserve Teddy any more than he’d deserved Raelynn. But life was never fair. She’d learned that long ago.
Hearing a car in the drive, she grabbed the cookies she’d baked and the small bag in which she’d packed a few toiletries, two pairs of shorts, some T-shirts, tennis shoes, suntan oil and a bathing suit. She’d told everyone in her family except Clay that she was going to Jackson for the weekend to see George—even though he hadn’t returned her call—so she needed to
slip away before someone spotted her getting into Kennedy’s Explorer.
With that in mind, she opened the front door before Kennedy could knock.
“Hi,” he said, disarming her with a smile so genuine she almost forgot she didn’t like him.
“Wow,” she muttered. “No wonder I was such an idiot.”
He blinked in surprise. “What did you say?”
“Never mind.” She let him take her bag while she locked the door, but he didn’t walk off right away. He frowned at the flip-flops on her feet.
“You brought some proper shoes, didn’t you?”
She nodded and moved toward the SUV, then stopped. “This is crazy,” she said. “I shouldn’t be going.”
“Why?”
“I don’t understand the point of it.”
“Most people go camping to get away, have a good time.”
She could relate to that; she definitely wanted to get away. But…“I know. It’s just that we—”
“Will be fine,” he finished. “You’re not really going to disappoint them, are you?” He motioned to the car, where Teddy was hanging halfway out the window, waving at her. Another boy sat beside him, leaning up on his knees to get a better look at her.
She sighed. “I guess not.”
“Good.” Skirting her, he went to the back of the Explorer, where he loaded her bags. Then he brought the cookies around front.
“Hi, Grace!” Teddy said as she climbed in.
She smiled broadly at him. “Hi, Teddy.”
“This is Heath.” Kennedy indicated his other son as he slid behind the wheel. “He’s ten.”
“Another handsome boy,” she said, and was rewarded with a shy smile.
They were all handsome, Grace realized. Especially Kennedy. If the boys grew up to resemble their father, they’d probably break more hearts than they could count.
With a sudden frown, she turned to stare out her window.
Kennedy must have sensed her change in mood because he squeezed her elbow. “Relax, okay?”
When she glanced over at him, the smile he gave her was impossible to resist.
Smiling in return, she buckled her seat belt and he handed her a coffee cup that had been in one of his cup holders. “It’s hot. Be careful.”
“Thanks.”
“There’s cream and sugar in that bag by your feet.”
“We got doughnuts, too,” Teddy announced, brandishing a large white bag.
“Sounds good,” she said.
“We all guessed which kind would be your favorite,” Teddy explained.
She could tell he thought he’d won. “So what made it into the bag?”
“For you? One of each,” Kennedy said. “A chocolate doughnut with sprinkles, an apple fritter and a maple bar.”
Teddy leaned forward. “Which is your favorite?”
“Who chose the sprinkles?” She expected Teddy or his brother to pipe up. She couldn’t imagine Kennedy picking sprinkles, but he was the one who grinned at her.
“I did.”
She arched her eyebrows. “Oh. You like sprinkles?”
“No, I was picking for you. That’s your favorite, right?”
Clearing her throat, she turned her face away. “Actually, that’s the only kind I
don’t
like.”
“Liar,” he muttered and she couldn’t help laughing.
“You’d better be careful lying to Dad,” Teddy said. “Or it’ll be torture time.”
“What’s torture time?” she asked.
“That’s where he holds you down and tickles you till you beg for mercy,” Heath said.
“Or he rubs his whiskers on your neck until you say ‘uncle,’” Teddy added.
“I’d never say uncle,” she said. “Not to your father.”
Kennedy turned right on Mulberry Street and headed toward the Tennessee state line. To the boys, Grace knew he seemed as calm as ever, but she could see the devilish glint in his eye. “Then I suggest you never lie to me,” he said softly. “Otherwise, I might have to prove you wrong.”
“He can make you say it,” Teddy agreed, nodding with absolute conviction.
Grace studied Kennedy for several long seconds. “No, he can’t. He’ll never get the best of me.”
“You can’t stop him,” Heath insisted. “He’s too strong.”
“The trick is not to fight. The trick is to play dead,” she said simply.
Kennedy looked over at her. “Play dead?”
She settled back in her seat. “What fun is torturing someone who doesn’t care?”
“Is it that easy not to care?”
“It can become a habit,” she said.
“You have to let your guard down sometime, Grace.”
The boys had lost the gist of the conversation but were still watching them curiously. “Why?” she asked.
“Protecting yourself that well means you risk missing out on something spectacular.”
“Oh, well.” She folded her arms. “At least I’ll survive.”
Some kind of emotion entered his eyes, but she had no idea what it signified. “That’s no way to live.”
She tossed him an empty smile. “Some people just do what they have to.”
Grace reminded Kennedy of a cactus. She could be prickly, of course. But in his mind, the comparison had more to do with the arid emotional environment she’d experienced in the past, the way she seemed to store what she absolutely needed inside her, and how she tried so hard to take very little from those around her. He wasn’t sure he’d ever met anyone who demanded less from others or worked harder to maintain a tough exterior.
“What would happen if you agreed to pretend we just met?” he asked as they took the turnoff that would lead them, in only fifteen more minutes, to the lake.
She’d been dozing, but when he spoke, she sat up. He could almost hear her defenses snapping back into place. “What do you mean?”
“I’m asking what terrible thing you think might happen.”
“I don’t know,” she said.
“
I
don’t think anything terrible would happen.”
“Because nothing terrible ever happens to you,” she pointed out. “You seem to have been born under a lucky sign.”
He lowered his voice, even though the boys were so busy with their Game Boys he knew they weren’t listening. “I’ve already agreed not to press you for
anything physical. What else do you have to worry about? That you might enjoy yourself? That you might actually let someone get to know you?”
“You already know me.”
He thought of the rumors that had always circulated about her and her family, the Bible she’d dropped in the woods, her guarded manner. “No, I don’t.”
“That’s funny,” she said. “Because I know you.”
“Not really. We never—”
She cut him off. “I remember the presentation you gave in fifth grade on the bottle-nosed dolphin. You made a mosaic out of broken glass. You threw it away after you got your A, but I stole it out of the trash and took it home.” She laughed softly at herself. “To me, it was the most beautiful thing in the world. I hung it on the wall of my room for four years.”
She pulled on her seat belt, obviously lost in thought. “And I remember when you broke your arm playing basketball in seventh grade. I knew you must really be hurt when you started to cry.” Her voice trailed off as though it had affected her deeply. “I watched your mother pick you up from school in her new Cadillac that day.”
“That injury was Joe’s fault,” he said, feeling uncomfortable because he couldn’t remember anything about her except the nasty things his friends used to say. “He fouled me hard when I drove to the basket.”
She didn’t respond to his comment. She was too busy recalling incident after incident. “I can still picture you riding in your father’s convertible T-Bird when you were nominated for royalty in high school,” she said. “I knew you’d win.” She laughed again. “And so did you.”
He wished she’d stop….
“Then there was the time you shaved your head, along with the rest of the football team. Not your best look, for sure, but you pulled it off better than most. And the winning touchdown pass against Cambridge Heights our senior year that put us in the play-offs. And your speech on graduation night—”
“That’s enough,” he said softly. Even he remembered graduation night. She’d come up and offered him a tentative smile as though she wanted to wish him well—and he’d turned away from her as if she hadn’t been standing there.
She didn’t say anything else, and they rode in silence until they reached the campground. When he’d paid the fees and backed into the space he’d reserved, the boys piled out, talking excitedly about the s’mores they had planned for later. But Kennedy caught Grace’s hand before she could open her door. He felt guilty for treating her so carelessly when they were kids, wanted to say something that would somehow erase what he’d done. But he couldn’t find the right words.
Turning her hand over, he traced one of the lines on her palm. “I guess you know me better than I thought,” he said simply and got out.
G
race didn’t know what to make of Kennedy. They hiked, they fished, they skipped rocks in the lake. He threw Teddy and Heath in the water. Then he threw her in, too. But he insisted on giving her a piggyback ride to camp so her wet tennis shoes wouldn’t get caked with mud. And he set up her tent and gave her the best pad and sleeping bag they owned. When Teddy and Heath picked her some wildflowers, he even found an old can and filled it with water so they could set them on the wooden picnic table near the campfire.
“Teddy told me you like the outdoors,” he said as she was sitting on a log nearby, doing a crossword puzzle with Heath and Teddy.
“I do.” She smiled, enjoying the smell of the fish he was grilling for dinner. Surprisingly, she couldn’t remember a time when she’d felt so relaxed, so far removed from Stillwater and everything that had happened there. It was the Kennedy Archer charm, and for once, she was basking in his light.
“What’s four down?” Heath asked, drawing her attention back to the holiday-themed crossword puzzle. “A babbling what?”
“It’s some form of water,” she said, hoping to help him figure it out.
“A stream?”
“The answer has five letters.”
Concentration etched a frown on Teddy’s face. “Lake only has four….”
“River has five,” Heath said.
“But the last letter is a
k,
” Grace reminded him.
“I know!” Heath cried. “Brook!”
She gave his shoulder a pat. “Good job.”
“Now let’s do six across,” Teddy said. “A bedtime what?”
“Story?” Heath answered, then immediately corrected himself. “No, it can only be four letters, and there’s an
i
in the middle.”
“Kiss?” Kennedy said.
Grace glanced up to find him looking at her. When their eyes met, the fluttery sensation in her stomach reminded her entirely too much of the hero worship she’d experienced when she was younger—so she immediately bent over the puzzle again.
“Hey, you’re right, Dad,” Teddy said. “I think it
is
kiss.”
“What’s the next one?” Kennedy asked.
“Nine down,” Heath said. “What you say on Valentine’s Day. Will you be what?”
“My Valentine!” Teddy shouted.
“That’s two words, dummy,” Heath said.
“It was a good guess,” Grace said to soften Heath’s criticism. “But in this case, I think it might be ‘mine.’”
Once again, Grace felt Kennedy’s gaze on her but refused to acknowledge him.
“Do
you
have a Valentine?” Teddy asked as she watched him write the letters.
She scooted over because Heath was trying to
squeeze between her and a knot on the log. “You mean a boyfriend?”
“Yeah.”
She thought of George’s neglect. “No, not really.”
“Not really?” Heath repeated.
“We’ve broken up,” she explained.
Teddy leaned forward to see around the fall of her hair. “But you like him?”
“Sure, I like him.”
“Are you going to
marry
him?” he said, his meaningful smile making Grace laugh.
“Maybe someday.”
“Why not now?” Heath wanted to know.
Grace wished Kennedy would stop his boys from asking her such personal questions—but she doubted he would. Although he appeared to be focused on cooking dinner, she suspected he was listening as intently as they were. “I—”
“Don’t want to get married?” Teddy inserted.
“It’s not that. I just…I’m not ready, I guess.”
“Oh.” Teddy seemed to consider her answer. “When will you be ready? Next week?”
She laughed again. “Maybe when I move back to Jackson in a few months.”
“I don’t think you should ever move away.” If Teddy had made this comment, Grace might not have been surprised. But hearing it from Heath, who didn’t show his emotions to the same extent, took her aback.
“Why not?” she asked.
“Because then you won’t be able to go camping with us anymore.”
“I see. Well—” she grinned at Kennedy “—I’m sure there’ll be another nice lady to take my place.”
“My mom’s the only one who’s come with us before,” Heath said.
The mention of Raelynn cast a sudden pall over the group, confirming to Grace how vital the wife and mother of this family had been to all of them. She put one arm around Heath and the other around Teddy. “I’ll bet she’s gazing down on you from heaven,” she said.
Teddy searched the sky as if he hoped to see her. “You think so? Right now?”
“Probably. She was so good she must be an angel. I believe God allows angels to look after the ones they love.”
Teddy blinked quickly, obviously fighting tears, and Grace decided to give the Archer men a moment of privacy. “I’m going to take a walk,” she said. “You two help your dad, okay?”
“Okay,” Heath said, but no one seemed particularly eager to focus on anything besides her. She could feel all three pairs of eyes staring after her as she slipped away.
Grace loved the cool lap of the water against her ankles, the sand squishing between her toes. But Teddy’s questions about her boyfriend, and the strange way she felt whenever Kennedy looked at her, had her thinking of George. What was going on with the man she planned to marry? He knew she wanted to talk to him. Surely he’d had a moment to contact her since she’d called yesterday morning—late last night, if no other time. For the past two years, they’d been close enough to call each other regardless of the hour.
Taking her cell from the pocket of her shorts, she checked once again to make sure she had service.
Her signal was as strong as ever. Her battery was fine, too.
So much for that excuse, she thought, and punched George’s number. His recorder answered almost before the phone could ring. “Hello. This is George E. Dunagan. I’m unable to come to the phone right now, but if you leave a message I’ll get back to you shortly.”
She waited for the beep. “George, why haven’t you called me? I’d really like to hear from you, so give me a ring when you get a minute, okay?” she said and hung up.
It was Saturday evening. She and George generally went out with friends, to a movie or to dinner. Where was he tonight?
“Grace?” Kennedy came through the trees behind her. “Dinner’s ready.”
She nodded but continued to admire the reflection of the sunset on the glistening water. “Beautiful, isn’t it?” she said.
When he didn’t respond, she glanced back at him. “I’ve never seen anything like it,” he replied, but he never took his eyes off her.
Kennedy watched Grace from across the fire, marveling at how comfortable she seemed to be with his boys. He wasn’t sure what he’d expected, but it certainly wasn’t the laughing, patient, doting woman he and his children had enjoyed for most of the day. When she was around Teddy and Heath, all trace of the hostility he’d witnessed at the pizza parlor disappeared. So did the distrust that entered her eyes the moment the boys wandered off and left her temporarily alone with him.
For the past fifteen minutes, the four of them had been roasting marshmallows, and she’d been smiling the entire time. Teddy and Heath kept accidentally setting their marshmallows on fire, but that didn’t stop them from stuffing their mouths full or proudly offering the charred results to Grace.
For Grace’s part, she accepted whatever Teddy or Heath gave her and pretended to like it.
“That was a good one, wasn’t it?” Teddy said as she licked her fingers after eating another of his blackened gifts.
“Excellent,” she said. When her eyes briefly locked with Kennedy’s, he sent her a wry grin and she responded with a little shrug that made him wonder how Joe or anyone else could think anything but the best of her. Maybe she had a prickly exterior, but her heart was soft. Probably too soft for her own good.
Kennedy rotated the marshmallows on his own stick, being careful to keep them out of the flames. If they turned out perfectly, maybe Grace would accept one from
him….
“Isn’t this fun?” Teddy had chocolate spread from ear to ear, but his smile was almost as wide.
Grace rocked back on her log perch, leaning on her palms and stretching out the smooth, bare legs Kennedy had insisted she smear with mosquito repellant. “It is.”
“You like being with us, don’t you?” Heath asked eagerly.
He suspected that her slight hesitation was imperceptible to the boys, but Kennedy noticed it right away. “Of course,” she said.
Teddy stabbed another two marshmallows with the pointy end of his stick. “Does that mean you’re
not
going to vote for Vicki Nibley?”
Again, Grace met Kennedy’s eyes through the rising smoke. “Someone needs to vote for poor Mrs. Nibley, don’t you agree?”
“Not you,” Heath said. “What about our dad?”
“I think enough people like your father.”
“A man can never have too many friends,” Kennedy said, moving his marshmallows to a safer part of the fire.
She wiped away the moisture on her lip caused by the heat of the flames. “So you have to go after the lone holdout?” she challenged.
He grinned at her. “So you have to side with the underdog?”
She laughed as she shoved the hair out of her face. “The underdog needs me much more than you do.”
He was beginning to wonder about that. He couldn’t stop his gaze from trailing after her wherever she went, kept imagining how her skin would feel if she ever let him touch her.
He raised his marshmallows higher above the hungry fire. What he wanted required a slow, steady hand. In this—and other things—he knew he could only be as successful as he was patient.
“Dad, your marshmallows are going to fall off!” Heath said only a couple of minutes later.
He saw that they were a toasty golden-brown and were sagging dangerously low.
Kennedy held a hand under his stick so they wouldn’t drop into the dirt. “Now they’ll melt in your mouth,” he said and circled the fire to give them to Grace.
When she realized they were for her, she waved him away. “No, thanks. You go ahead.”
He frowned, hoping she’d reconsider. “Are you sure? I made them for you.”
The surprise in her expression told him he’d com
municated the fact that it mattered to him whether or not she accepted his small offering, and he wished he hadn’t been so obvious. Embarrassed, he started to turn back, but she reached out and caught his hand.
“Actually, they look pretty good. I guess I have room for one more,” she said.
And that was when he knew he was right about Grace Montgomery—and almost everyone else in Stillwater, especially his mother and Joe, were wrong.
When Grace’s cell phone rang, it was nearly three in the morning, but she didn’t mind. She’d been lying in her tent for at least four hours, trying to sleep. But every time she closed her eyes, she saw Kennedy. She heard his laugh when he’d tossed them all so easily in the water. Felt the strength in his arms when he carried her back to camp. Saw the boyish eagerness on his face when she’d accepted his marshmallows.
Which made her particularly glad to read George’s name on her lit screen.
“Finally,” she muttered and pressed the Talk button. “There you are,” she said. “I was beginning to think you’d forgotten all about me.”
“Sorry. I…I should’ve called earlier.”
The eagerness she usually heard in his voice was gone, and his tone suggested there was more he wasn’t saying. “But—”
“This isn’t easy for me, Grace.”
Her stomach tightened into a hard knot, but she lowered her voice so she wouldn’t wake Kennedy or his boys. “What’s wrong, George?”
“I’ve met someone else,” he blurted.
Grace sucked air between her teeth as though someone had just punched her. Could it be true? George
loved her. She knew that. He’d always loved her. Which meant something else was going on. His faith was dwindling. She needed to convince him she’d be ready to make a commitment soon.
“George, you—you’re overreacting to having me gone, that’s all. I’ll be back in a little while. I can come see you for a few days next week if you want.”
There was a stilted pause. She could feel him weakening, so the resolve in his next words shocked her. “I can’t, Grace. I’ve waited for you long enough. You know how I feel about you, how I’ll always feel. But even Petra—”
“You’ve been talking to your sister about me?”
“Why are you whispering?”
“I’m camping with friends.”
“What friends?”
“For someone who’s seeing another woman, you sound pretty possessive, George.”
“It’s just that you’ve never mentioned any friends in Stillwater.”
“You don’t know them.”
“Of course I don’t know them. Who are they?”
“Someone I went to high school with, okay? It’s no big deal,” she said, and wished that was true. Unfortunately, anything to do with Kennedy seemed like a very big deal indeed. “What did Petra say?” she asked.
“I know you don’t believe it, but she likes you, Grace. She’s just worried about me. Says our relationship is too one-sided.”
“One-sided means she doesn’t think I care about you. I plan on marrying you, having a family with you. That’s not caring?”
“If you really wanted to marry me, you would’ve done it by now.”
Grace hid inside her sleeping bag, trying not to smell Kennedy’s cologne on the lining. “That’s not necessarily true.”
“Yes, it is. Let’s be honest. You practically cringe when I touch you.”
Her hot breath bounced back at her inside the bag, making her think of a tomb. She was completely shut off. Alone. “No, I don’t!”
“Do you assume I hadn’t noticed?”
Grace stared into the blackness. Sometimes she tried to feign the interest she didn’t feel naturally. But she didn’t
hate
making love with George. He was patient, gentle. “I don’t
cringe.
”
“You don’t enjoy making love.”
“Once in a while that’s true,” she admitted. “But not always.”
“Not always?”
At times she felt as though she was almost normal. “Right.”
He chuckled bitterly. “That’s real passion.”
Grace wondered whether he’d feel any better if she finally explained
why
she struggled so much with physical intimacy. But she feared it was already too late. And she wasn’t sure it would be fair to expect George to understand and compensate—which, knowing him, he’d probably try to do. The past was her problem. He had the chance to get out of the relationship, to start seeing someone who wasn’t damaged as she was, and she cared enough to want that for him. Why should he have to pay for what had happened to her?