Death by Proposal (18 page)

“How
much?” asked Cindy, “and how do you know?”

“We’ve
tapped into Clay’s computer and are following what he says and does,” said
Mattheus.

“I
thought he wasn’t a suspect. I thought he could go home,” said Cindy.

“Yeah,
that’s why we’re checking, because he’s leaving soon,” said Mattheus. “Believe
me, there’s nothing going on with him. He’s gets emails from Riva telling him
she’s sorry for his loss. The guy needs a little comfort and connection, so he
emails her back. Nothing out of the order. Could be Riva feels responsible for
what happened, after all, she’s been hanging out with Sean. She probably knows
much more than she’s letting on.”

“Conjecture,”
said Cindy.

“You
refuse to agree with me about anything,” Mattheus became solemn, “you refuse to
take in the facts. I’m wondering why? What’s behind this, anyway? Are you
playing for time because you don’t want the case end and us to be together?”

Cindy
picked up her wine glass and drank it all down. Mattheus felt overwhelming.

“You’ve
turned all your suspiciousness onto me, again,” said Cindy plainly. “It
exhausting.”

Mattheus
stood up at the bar. “Because you won’t answer my questions. Come clean, Cindy,
what’s going on?”

“I’m
tired of being suspected for every little thing,” said Cindy. “It wears on me
like a pound of rocks. It doesn’t work, it’s painful.”

“Well,
I’m sorry to have turned into a pound of rocks in your life,” said Mattheus,
leaving his drink half unfinished, turning and leaving the bar.

  
Despite the overcast sky and blustery weather Cindy decided to leave the hotel
and walk along the shore to the natural volcanic pool about a mile away. It was
a beautiful site that she had wanted to spend time at since she got here.

As
soon as she stepped out of the hotel, warm, thick, salty winds blew at her,
tossing her hair onto her face. It actually felt good to walk through the tail
end of the storm, amidst the shells and driftwood that had been brushed up onto
shore. The wild, windswept feel of the place oddly soothed her.

Cindy
walked slowly, enjoying the feel of her feet on the sand and breathed deeply. Clay
and his family would be probably leaving in a couple of days, as soon as the
airport was ready. The case was going nowhere fast and Cindy felt sad about it.
She felt badly for Kate’s family as well, particularly Carl. At first he’d
seemed like a mountain of strength, and now he seemed more desperate for a way
to make sense of things.  Cindy found Carl interesting. He had many unexpected
and interesting qualities.

The
wind blew up as she walked and it was awhile before Cindy realized that someone
was walking behind her, getting closer with each step.

“Cindy,”
a male voice said behind her.

Cindy
spun around.

“God,
I didn’t mean to scare you,” said Carl, his hair blown about by the wind.

“You
did though,” said Cindy laughing.

“I
called to you while I was behind you,” he spoke quickly. “You didn’t hear me?”

“The
surf must have drowned it out,” said Cindy.

Carl
took a step closer and to Cindy’s surprise, it felt good and comforting to have
him there with her.

“I’m
on my way to the volcanic preserve,” said Cindy as the foam from the waves blew
in their faces.

“May
I join you?” asked Carl loudly, over the waves.

“Looks
like you already have,” said Cindy, and they both smiled.

“Good,
let’s go then,” he put his hand gently in the crevice of her back, turning
Cindy back in the direction she was walking in.

“You’re
an incredibly brave young woman,” Carl said as they started walking again.

That
surprised Cindy, “Why?”

“You
don’t see it,” he said, “you don’t see anything about yourself,” and he put his
whole arm closer around her.

“Carl,
I’m with Mattheus,” Cindy said then, edging away.

“Then
where is he, at a moment like this?” asked Carl.

“At
a moment like what?”

“At
a moment of danger and loneliness,” Carl replied spontaneously.

“What’s
the danger?” Cindy was confused.

“We
just had a disturbing interview with Clay,” Carl continued. “We just found out
that Sean didn’t give the bracelet to Riva. Things are stirring, unknown forces
working.”‘

“It’s
always that way in my line of work,” said Cindy quietly.

“Mattheus
should be at your side,” Carl was emphatic.

Cindy
was stung. “We like time alone,” she answered defensively, “we need it.
Especially when working on cases.”

“Is
this work you plan to do forever?” Carl asked, his brow curling.  “Don’t you
want to settle down and have a family one day?”

Cindy
was silent. Of course that had been something she’d wanted all her life,
something she’d hoped for and planned.

“Maybe?”
she said.

“Maybe?”
Carl was taken aback. “Why only maybe?”

Cindy
felt as though Carl was turning into an Uncle to her now, looking after her the
way he’d looked after Kate her whole life long. And, to her surprise, Cindy
liked it.

“You
get used to a life style,” Cindy started, “it gets a grip on you. Before you
know it, years pass by.”

“How
well I know,” said Carl. “I worked for years as corporate lawyer.”

Cindy
was surprised.

“Just
kept doing it because it brought in money and prestige and the wives wanted
that.”

“And
what did you want?” asked Cindy.

“Someone
like you,” said Carl, looking at her through the sand which was blowing up
around them. “That’s all I ever really wanted, someone just like you.”

Cindy
felt shivery. “That’s probably how you felt about all your wives in the
beginning,” she said softly. “It’s how everyone feels with someone new.”

“No,”
Carl shook his head slowly, “this time is different. Let’s sit down and talk.
The volcanic pool can wait for another time.”

Cindy
smiled. He had a sweet charm about him that made it easy to go along.

The
two of them stopped walking then and sat down at the edge of the shore.

“I
know I’m too old for you, Cindy,” Carl started.

Cindy
shrugged, age meant little to her. Her life had taken so many detours that
conventional standards didn’t mean much anymore.

“It’s
not about age,” said Cindy, “it’s about who a person is, what they want, how we
are together. It’s about what we bring out in each other. But, truly, I’m not
looking for anyone new.”

“You’re
really in love with Mattheus?” Carl turned to her full on.

Cindy
couldn’t answer.

“You
hesitate,” said Carl swiftly. “If you were really in love you would have said
so right away.”

“I
don’t know what really in love means anymore,” said Cindy. “Relationships are
more complicated than that. I definitely love Mattheus, that’s for sure.”

“Love
him but not in love?” Carl persisted.

“You
can’t build a life on
in love
,” Cindy said. “How long do those feelings
last anyway?”

“If
it’s the right person, a whole lifetime,” said Carl.

Carl
was sweet and hopeful and Cindy liked that. “It’s nice that you’re still so
hopeful, Carl.”

“Actually,
it’s amazing,” he responded, “given all that I’ve been through.”

Cindy
agreed. He’d been through a lot and was still open to finding love. She mused
about that. It could certainly indicate a hopeful person, or perhaps it pointed
to an attraction to getting hurt, on his part, or to an addiction to the rush
that falling in love brings. Cindy wanted to know what had gone wrong in his
marriages. But this wasn’t the time to ask about it. Things were hard enough
for him now as it was.

“You
know, I found out new things about the case from Mattheus,” Cindy said, turning
the focus away from them, back onto Kate.

Carl
seemed surprised. “Really? What?”

“Well,
for starters, Mattheus didn’t think the fact that it wasn’t Kate’s bracelet
that Riva had would make that much of a difference. Mattheus found more
witnesses though. He said he’d located some people in Kate’s life who actually
heard Sean threatening her and verbally abusing her publically.”

Carl
shot up in a bolt. “Who told him that?  Exactly what did they hear Sean say?”

“They
said he called Kate names and want her to get away,” said Cindy.

“That’s
it?” asked Clay.

“That’s
a lot,” nodded Cindy.

“I’ve
heard all about that before,” said Carl. “It was common knowledge. Kate and
Sean had lots of lovers quarrels publicly. That’s why I kept trying to get her
away from him. He was a loose cannon with his mouth. But he never lifted a hand
to her.”

“Still,
it builds the case against Sean,” said Cindy.

“Maybe,”
said Carl, “but there’s no direct evidence linking him to her killing.”

“No,
there isn’t,” Cindy agreed. “It’s tough, I so badly want you and Kate’s family
to have closure.”

“Closure?”
Carl moaned suddenly, “It’s never going to happen. Not for me. This is a wound
I’ll never get over. I don’t know how I’ll get along without Kate. I just don’t
know how.”

“It’s
going to take time, but you’ll do it,” said Cindy quietly, “I know you will.”

Carl
leaned over then and kissed the top of Cindy’s head, and she felt his warmth
and yearning flowing down inside.

*

Carl
and Cindy spoke for a little while longer and then returned to the shelter of
the hotel as the sky suddenly became more threatening and the ocean looked as
though riptides were beginning to form. They parted in the lobby and Cindy went
back up to her, wondering what state of mind she would find Mattheus in.

When
she walked into the room, she didn’t find him at all. He wasn’t there. Probably
elsewhere in the hotel, Cindy mused. As she walked to sofa to sit down, Cindy
saw an envelope addressed to her on the table. It was from Clay.

Cindy
opened it quickly, her hands trembling. The note was written in plain, somewhat
scrawling handwriting.

Dear
Kate,

  
Do not come back to see me again. Do not bring Carl or Mattheus. I, too, am
grieving and must recover. There is no respect here for me, no one cares about
what I’m going through. Kate warned me about Carl and now I see how right she
was. He’s cold hearted and nasty. If Kate knew you, she would have warned me about
you too. She’d stay, stay away from all of them, Clay. They’re all predators,
looking for a kill. I’ve written poems about predators that have been
published. I can spot a predator whenever I see one. And now I see one.  A
woman like you, with many men, must not come back to see me.

Cindy
shivered. She read the note a few times. It was disturbing and bizarre. She had
to show it to Mattheus, it had to be explored.

Cindy
quickly took her phone to call Mattheus. His answering service took her
message.

Then
she quickly called Carl. “I got a strange, upsetting note from Clay,” Cindy
said to Carl immediately.

“What
kind of note?”Carl’s voice sounded strained and nervous.

Cindy
wanted to have Carl come over and read it for himself, but what if Mattheus
suddenly returned?

“Clay’s
warning me not to come and see him again,” said Cindy. “And he said you mustn’t
go either.”

“I
mustn’t?” said Carl. “Well, now I’m going to make a point of making another
visit. The airport won’t be open for another two days, so, I have time. I’ve
already checked on him and found out that when he’s not in the hotel he goes
roaming somewhere. I’m going to find out exactly where. He’ll go there and I’ll
surprise him.”

“Why
are you going? For spite?” asked Cindy.

“I’m
going because this guy puts my teeth on edge,” said Carl. “I want to find out
more about him for myself.”

Cindy
liked the idea, and she liked Carl’s defiance, his determination to see things
through and unwillingness to take things on face value.

“Okay,”
said Cindy, “I’m going back onto Kate’s Facebook Page to check things further
now. Let me see what else has popped up.”

“Clay
doesn’t have a Facebook page,” said Carl. “Now that says something, doesn’t it?”

“Not
necessarily,” said Cindy. “Some people are private. Let me see what else I can
find on Kate’s Page.”

*

Kate
went straight to the computer on the patio, sat down and quickly went onto Kate’s
Facebook Page. It was now filled with messages of sorrow, horror and
condolence. People were posting constantly, as if she were still alive.

Kate,
Kate, how did this happen? We love you. We’re praying for you.

Kate,
we’ll never forget you.

I
don’t believe you’re gone, Kate. I refuse to believe it. I’ll miss you forever.

Someone
had posted pictures of Kate as a little girl, and then all through her years
growing
up.
There were many photos of her there with Sean, at all
different important occasions. They actually looked lovely and happy together. Cindy
wondered who posted it all? Maybe a combination of her friends and family? The
photos were compelling and moving. Cindy stared at them, tracing the journey of
a young woman to the day she met her fiancée, and the fateful week-end she
became engaged.

Now,
in what looked like a memorial for her, there were also posted little messages
that Kate had written to others in the past. They were simple, engaging and
playful, describing her day lightly.

Sean
and I had the most wonderful time roller blading, she wrote. The day was
perfect.

Here
are some pictures of Sean and me apple picking. What a beautiful day.

It
was both heartwarming and unnerving to hear Kate describe her days in her own
voice.

Cindy
decided to scroll down once again and look at the messages Kate had posted
announcing her engagement that fateful night.

Happy,
thrilled, excited, she wrote.

Cindy
carefully scanned every single message in response.

Someone,
hearing about the engagement, had sent her a quick reply.