Deception (6 page)

Waking up with
her all over me had been a welcomed surprise, I'd been awake for a good five
minutes with her doing her best to climb me while I did everything not to take
her up on her offer. I knew she would've been livid if I had. And since when do
you care about that? Less than twenty four hours in her presence and already
you're going soft. I decided to put that aside for now and turned to the happy
task of informing my mother that she had another grandchild.

Amber

Colin returned
to the kitchen just as I was putting breakfast on the table. I hadn't even
checked whether he wanted to eat or not, just fell back into the old routine
we'd had from our short-lived romance. He liked my cooking or at least that's
what he'd said, this new Colin might refuse it just to spite me though so I was
prepared to get my feelings hurt.

"Thank
you." He sat down to his vegetable cheese omelet with home fries and
toast. I took a smaller portion for myself and sat across from him.

"You're
welcome." I kept my head down I'm usually a timid person by nature and
with the added hostility I wanted to make myself as invisible as possible. I
didn't know what would set him off and though this new calmer being was much
more welcomed than the tyrant I had met yesterday, I didn't fool myself for one
second that things would remain this ...civil.

"I called
my mother and told her about Anthony, I had a hard time talking her out of
rushing right over, she's given us one day before she invades."

I tensed my
whole body, if his mother knew that meant others soon would; what would that
mean for me, for my son?

"Why the
fuck do you keep tensing up every time I mention my family? And don't try
telling me that one of them did or said anything to you the last time because I
know it's a fucking lie."

"If you
have all the answers why the...hell do you keep asking me then? If you don't
want to hear the answer, then don't ask the question." I'd lost my
appetite, I was truly over his attitude who the hell did he think he was
anyway?

"Watch your
tone."

"Fuck...You."
I threw down my fork and made to rise from the table but he was too fast for
me.

"I warned
you." He grabbed my upper arms bringing me closer to him; before I knew
what he was doing he was kissing me. No that's not right, this wasn't a kiss it
was a ravishing. His tongue was halfway down my throat before I realized I was
responding. My body clung to his like a limpet while I tried telling myself we
should stop, but I didn't want to stop. It had been so long since I’d felt like
this he had awakened my body, taught it to want his, only for me to be torn
away after too short a time. My body recognized his it wanted it burned. My
nipples were pebbles of aching need as I pulled on his hair trying to get even
closer to him. He kissed me like my Colin, with passion. The kiss was punishing
but oh so good, and when he ran his fingertips over my nipples I was a puddle
of goo. I lost all thought and sense of being as the kiss consumed me I felt
the heat of his need against me and mewled. His answering groan was loud, and I
guess that's what broke the spell. He drew away from me abruptly and without
another word turned and left the kitchen. I was left catching my breath and
wondering what the hell was happening to my life.

Colin

What, the fuck,
was that? Was I so desperate that I'd wade in that pool again? Didn't she burn
me badly enough before? Fuck. My heart was still racing and my body refused to
obey me. I knew I still wanted her, but not like this I wanted her on my own
terms. Not with the same old passion with which she’d ruled me.

I spent the rest
of the day holed up in my office. Face it Colin you're hiding out. I peaked in
on my son in the afternoon but apart from that I stayed the hell away from her.
When it was nearing Anthony's bedtime I snuck into my room heading to the en
suite bathroom to have a shower. I heard her on the monitor, I couldn't quite
hear what she was saying so I turned it up, and got my second shock of the day.
She was singing some slow sad melody about love abiding and loving me for a
long, long time.

Fuck me, oh my
fucking hell, what the hell is she trying to do to me? She sounded so sad, so
alone; why was she singing those words? What the hell did it mean? I pulled my
hair in frustration as tears ran down my cheeks. I dared anyone to listen to
those words sung in her sweet, melancholic voice and not break. The saddest
part was that she was singing to herself, that was no lullaby for my son and
she had no idea I was in my room listening in. That was a woman's broken heart
put into song. How many times had she sung this shit to herself?

She broke my
fucking heart for the second time.

Almost One Year
Earlier

After our second
full day together Colin insisted I move out of the hostel where I was staying
and move into the villa with him. Separate rooms of course. There was no
hesitation on my part. I'd fallen madly and completely in love with this man.

For someone
who's usually overly cautious I threw caution to the wind and jumped right in
with both feet. It was the first time in my life that I'd relaxed my guard and
allowed myself to be free.

After losing my
mom and dad in a car accident at fifteen I was pretty much alone in the world.
Melissa's family had been awarded guardianship since they were my godparents,
but I 'd never felt like one of them, though Melissa and I were pretty close.
The proceeds from the insurance was in trust until I turned twenty one, but the
executor said they were stipulations that allowed for a graduation gift among
other things, I chose this trip.

Melissa was
supposed to join me but had to cancel at the last minute when Keith her
boyfriend of three years got hurt and was hospitalized.

So that's how I
came to be alone on the Isle of Greece. It was very badly done of me but I was
very happy that I was alone, now there would be no one to distract from my time
with Colin.

We spent our
days getting to know each other. Our likes and dislikes. What our dreams were.
I was amazed to find that he was so down to earth. A rich, gorgeous young guy
who was, if not exactly shy very laid back.

He treated me
like the proverbial princess, always holding my chair, opening doors for me,
making me walk on the inside. He was so attentive and sweet that he captivated
me. I was so taken with him and the way he made me feel that there was no
remorse when I gave him my virginity one week after meeting him for the first
time. He made that experience so memorable, so special. With candlelight and
strewn rose petals, soft words of praise, those things that most took for
granted but meant the world to me. I was so in love, we were so in love. It was
magical.

Present Day

After putting
the baby to bed I wasn't sure what to do with myself, it was too early for bed,
and Colin had been missing since this morning, hiding out in his office.

I wasn't quite
sure how to handle the news about his family's impending visit, there were some
members of his family that I didn't want anywhere near my son.

They'd been able
to scare me away last time, but no force on earth could make me run and leave
my child. And since Colin was adamant that I wasn't taking Anthony anywhere I
guess he was stuck with me or he'll have the fight of a lifetime on his hands.

I sat there for
so long with my wandering thoughts that it was bedtime before I knew it.

This of course
posed another dilemma. Was I supposed to just go to his bedroom and climb into
his bed? I couldn't bring myself to do it still, so hoping for the best I
tiptoed pass his room to the other guest room.

I had barely put
my head to the pillow after changing into my tank and shorts when the door
opened and he came in. Without a word exchanged between us he picked me up and
took me to his bed. He threw the sheet back and laid me down before covering me
back up and climbing in on his side. He pulled my back to his front holding me
close.

"I thought
I made it clear that this is where you sleep, don't let me have to come find
you again you wouldn't like what happens."

"Must you
always threaten me? In case you haven't noticed I'm a new mother who has hardly
had any sleep in the last month and a half, my body feels like a foreign object
and my boobs hurt, so forgive me if I don't give a damn what you want right
now."

Did I just tell
him my boobs hurt? T.M.I Amber, really T.M.I.

"What do
you mean your boobs hurt?"

"Just drop
it okay."

"No I will
not just drop it, I asked you a question, why does your boobs hurt?"

"It's from
the nursing okay, sometimes they're too full even after the baby feeds now can
we please go to sleep or do you have any more embarrassing questions you'd like
to ask me?" I tried pulling away from him but he held on for another
minute before getting up and leaving the room. I tried not to cry, firstly
because I didn't know why the hell I felt like crying and secondly because I
didn't want him to know he could hurt me.

He returned some
time later and sat on my side of the bed.

"Turn over
on your back." He said it so gently that I didn't question it I just did
what he asked. When he took my top off I started to tense up; until I felt the
most amazing sensation against my breasts. He'd brought me a warm cloth to ease
the strain. Wow! Who knew he could show such kindness.

"Where'd
you learn this trick?"

"I called
my mom, she suggested it along with some of this Aloe Vera cream."

He proceeded to
press the warm cloth into my nipples soothing them and making me burn at the
same time. I squirmed uncomfortably as my body reacted to his ministrations. He
just looked me in the eye with no outward expression on his face, but I could
see the tight rein he had on himself by the tension in his jaw. "You asked
your mom about this?" I was mortified, what must she be thinking about me?
First I run away now I reappear with a baby in tow. She must have a million and
one questions and I didn't have the first clue how to answer any of them.

"Of course,
she's a mother and the wife of a doctor, I took it for granted that she would
know what to do."

I had the most
relief I'd had in ages as I felt the pain ease out of my sore tissue.

"She also
suggested switching sides when feeding Anthony, apparently if he feeds at the
same nipple continuously it will cause soreness and discomfort." Wow, how
long was that conversation? I barely had the thought before I felt his mouth
cover my nipple.

Oh my.

Colin

I can't believe
I'm doing this I had no intentions on touching her like this. I’d only wanted
to give her some comfort. I didn't like knowing that feeding my son caused her
pain. And why is that Colin? Shut up.

I gave her
nipple one last lick removing the bead of milk that my sucking had pulled
forth. Fuck this shit is potent. I wanted so badly to finish what I started; I
mean she wasn't exactly fighting me off. In fact she was writhing beneath me as
though starved for my touch. I pulled away from her and sat up taking deep
cleansing breaths.

I probably
should've apologized, but bastard that I am I just left the room. I didn't like
what the fuck was going on since I’d found them in that cabin yesterday. She
wasn't acting anything like what I'd come to believe. And the things she kept
saying just worked to confuse me even more.

I wandered into
the nursery to look at my son, my love for him was complete, he was the only
thing I was sure about in my crazy mixed up world. I knew I wasn't supposed to
but I didn't really care I needed this right now, so I picked up his sleeping
form out of his bed and cuddled him to my heart.

Whatever I did
now would affect him as well. It wasn't just about me and Amber, he was more
important than the two of us. What would he think of a father who’d destroyed
his mother? How would I feel if I destroyed her? There was too much not fitting
in my head. I had expected one thing and found another, but until I got to the
bottom of this mess I was playing my cards close to my chest.

I think I
preferred the days when I thought I hated her, at least then I was clear on
where I stood, this not knowing, these doubts, were driving me insane. I wanted
to believe that I'd been wrong about her; that there had been some kind of
mistake, but I just couldn't see it. All the evidence I had pointed to her
guilt, it's just seeing her in the flesh that dissuaded me from my oath to
destroy her.

I didn't make
the same mistake she had made earlier, I turned off the monitor in his room
before sitting in the rocker with him cradled in my arms. It was the first time
I'd really held him just to hold him. I kissed his crown, inhaling the sweet
baby smell, loving the feel of him here. My beautiful son my boy.