Deep Down (Lockhart Brothers #1) (22 page)

“I need to go clean up that plate.”

“Shawn’s got it.” Margie smiled and left to go back to the floor. We were full. I wondered if Reed would come in today.

“What can I make you to eat?” Gene asked.

“I’ll make a salad. Thanks, Gene.”

“Here.” He plated a piece of grilled chicken off the grill. “Put some protein on it.”

The savory smell of the freshly cooked chicken made my stomach growl. I took it and went to the prep table to make a salad.

I was a hot mess and I didn’t know how to make things better. After lunch I lost myself in a mountain of dishes, wishing the hot soapy water would wash away my worries.

“Ivy?” Margie called behind me. “It’s after two, honey. You’re off.”

“Oh. I’m almost done.”

“Someone brought you something.”

I turned around, my wet hands dripping onto the tile floor. Margie held a dozen fresh red roses in a milk jug with the top cut off.

“Reed.” Tears welled in my eyes.

“Did that boy’s mother not teach him what a proper vase looks like?”

I laughed and approached Margie to smell the fragrant flowers. “It’s kind of an inside joke. Oh, Margie, he really is so sweet.”

“You found a good one.”

“Is he still out there?”

“He’s at the counter waiting on lunch.”

I dried my hands on my apron. “Do I look okay?”

“Beautiful as always,” Margie said. “I’ll set these flowers on my desk for you to take home when you go.”

I nodded, already halfway to the double doors connecting the kitchen to the dining room. When I pushed them open, I saw Reed at the counter, wearing a navy blue suit. His face was unshaven—just the way I liked it.

He turned as I approached, sliding off the stool he was sitting on.

“Thank you,” I said, reaching up to cup his cheeks in my hands. “I’m kind of soaked with dishwater right now or I’d hug you.”

He bent and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into a hug so tight he lifted my feet a couple inches off the floor.

My tension faded away in the warmth of his arms. “I’m sorry about the other night,” I whispered in his ear.

“Don’t be. I want to respect your boundaries, but I need to know what they are.”

“Sometimes I don’t even know.”

Reed pulled back, rubbing his hands down my upper arms. “We’ll figure it out together, Ivy.”

I nodded, my heart full of gratitude for this man who accepted me with open arms—quirks, fears and all.

“Can I take you and Noah to Jimmy’s for dinner this week?” he asked. “And another date for the two of us whenever you’re ready?”

“Yes.”

I didn’t know if I was capable of having a physical relationship with a man. But after getting a taste of one with Reed, I knew what I was missing. I’d gone to sleep with an ache between my legs every night since our failed second date. My head told me to stop this and go back to the safety of my isolated existence, focusing all my energy on Noah.

But my heart craved more of the closeness we’d shared. Even after my freak out, Reed still wanted me. If he accepted me as I was, maybe it was time I accepted myself that way, too.

JIMMY’S ITALIAN PLACE WAS
crowded, and I was pretty sure at least half the people here were speculating about me, Reed and Noah sitting together in a booth.

“Do you feel like people are looking at us?” I asked Reed.

“Yeah. You know how it is in a small town like this.”

“I’m hungry,” Noah said, looking up at me from our side of the booth. “Want some scapetti.”

I ruffled his hair, smiling at his mispronunciation of spaghetti. “It’ll be here soon, sweetie. Want some bread and butter?”

He nodded solemnly and I reached for the basket of bread in the center of our table.

“I want Reed to do it,” Noah said. I looked at him, my brows lowered with surprise.

“Sure thing,” Reed said, reaching for a piece of bread. “Do you like lots of butter or a little bit?”

“Lots of butter,” Noah said, smiling.

I sat back, watching the two of them. Since my son was born, I’d never felt the need to bring a man into our lives. I’d never questioned whether I was enough, because I knew I was. I loved Noah with everything in me.

And now I realized it wasn’t about
needing
a man in our lives. Reed was here because I wanted him here, and because he deserved to be. Being around my son was a privilege I’d never cared to extend to any man. It felt good, having someone with us who cared enough to ask if Noah wanted a little butter or a lot.

Reed turned over his placemat and drew Noah a train, complete with a waving conductor in the front. He was no artist, but Noah’s eyes lit up as he pointed out the wheels and the caboose.

My heart was full. This moment felt too perfect to be real. I didn’t even feel self-conscious as I slid my hand across the table and slipped it into Reed’s. His eyes met mine as he stroked a thumb over my knuckles.

“Will you guys come to my parents’ house for Christmas dinner?” he asked.

“Oh.” I tucked my hair behind my ear as I considered. “We always do Christmas morning at Margie and Gene’s. We open presents and then go into the diner to make the meal we serve free for people who don’t have a place to be that day.”

“We do a family trip to church on Christmas Eve and a family dinner on the evening of Christmas Day,” he said. “What if you guys do those things with me and I’ll come help make the meal at the diner on Christmas morning?”

“You might get stuck peeling potatoes.”

“I don’t mind.”

“Okay. It sounds awesome.”

After that evening, Reed started spending more time with me and Noah. We’d make dinner at his apartment, where Noah and Snoop would chase each other tirelessly. One weekend we drove to St. Louis and took Noah on a train ride.

And when Christmas morning came, he did get stuck peeling potatoes at the diner. I snuck peeks at him from the other side of the diner’s kitchen, where I was helping Noah mix pumpkin pie batter.

“Wonder what you’re smiling about?” Margie said with a knowing smirk.

“I can’t help it,” I admitted. Wearing jeans, a worn red flannel and a Red Sox baseball hat, Reed was a poster boy for rugged sex appeal. I loved the way his scruffy cheeks felt against my neck when he kissed me there.

We’d backed things up physically since that night when I’d left his apartment in a panic. Now we only kissed, though just that was often enough to get me hot and bothered after a few minutes.

“You two are the talk of the town, you know,” Margie said. “There were already whispers, but when everyone saw you sitting together at church last night, with Noah in his lap . . .”

Reed looked up from his work on the other side of the room and smiled at me.

“Good things happen to good people,” Margie said. “I’m happy for you, Ivy. I just hope you’ll still have time for me and Gene.”

I turned to her, my brow furrowed. “Of course I will.”

She sighed softly and put the finishing touches on a fluted pie crust. “The Lockharts are a big, close-knit family. If you become one of them—”

“Margie.” I laughed softly. “That’s not happening anytime soon. Reed and I haven’t even–” I glanced at Noah, “
you know.
”

“But if it does happen—”

I put my hand on her arm. “If it does happen, it won’t change anything between us. You and Gene are family to me and Noah. We love you guys.”

“We love you, too,” Margie said, tears shining in her eyes. “Gene and I were never able to have kids, and you’re the daughter and grandson we always wanted. Keeping Noah on Friday nights . . . it’s not a chore. It’s the highlight of our week.”

“It’s the highlight of his, too.” We both looked at him, stirring the pumpkin pie puree with an intent look on his face. “You know, when I came here, I was completely alone. And now Noah and I are lucky enough to have you guys
and
Reed in our lives. We need all of you.”

Margie smiled. “I’m so relieved to hear that.” The doors between the kitchen and the lobby were pushed open and she glanced into the crowded room of Lovely residents.

“Did you see who’s out there?” she asked.

“Looks like half of Lovely. We’ve got more people than last year. I love how festive everyone is.”

“Walter Grieves is here. That’s a first.”

“Walter?”

“You should go say hello to him.”

I reached for a towel and dried off my hands. “I’m going to.”

We had Christmas music playing in the restaurant, but it was being drowned out by the sounds of conversation and laughter. This wasn’t just a meal for people who couldn’t afford to make a traditional Christmas dinner, but it was for anyone in Lovely who didn’t have another place to be.

Walter was perched on his usual stool, a paperback in his hands. I made my way over to him and tapped him on the shoulder.

“Merry Christmas,” I said when he turned.

“Ivy.” He smiled. “You’re looking well.”

“Better than two days ago?” It was the last time I’d served him breakfast, since Margie had given me Christmas Eve off.

“Just in general, I suppose. You look happy.”

“I am happy. And I’m really glad you’re here.”

He shrugged. “It’s not Christmas without turkey, right?”

“True. It’s also not Christmas without the people you care about, so you’re in the right place.”

A moment of awkward silence passed.

“I need to get back to the kitchen,” I said, waving a hand at the double doors.

“Of course. I need to get back to this story.” He smiled and tapped his paperback.

“I was actually going to ask how your potato peeling skills are.”

“Mine?”

“Yeah. Reed could use some help, and I’m pretty sure he won’t let me near a knife after the way I cut myself last time I peeled potatoes at his place.”

“Can’t say I blame him.” Walter looked at me over the lenses of his glasses. “I’d be glad to help.”

He closed his book, grabbed his coat and followed me into the kitchen.

We were so busy with the meal that we only had time for a few quick bites of food ourselves. By the time Reed, Noah and I got to his parents’ house that evening, we were all starving.

Grace had prepared an elaborate, traditional meal. The whole family was there–even Justin, the youngest of the brothers.

The family gift exchange after dinner was like nothing I’d ever seen. With so many people, presents were stacked high around the tall Christmas tree in the family room.

Noah’s gleeful squeal when he opened the train set Reed got him brought tears to my eyes. Margie and Gene had also bought him one to keep at their house, which he’d opened this morning.

What little extra money I had, I’d spent on Noah for Christmas. But I’d managed to buy Reed a scarf, which he put on as soon as he opened it.

“I love it,” he said, kissing me in front of his whole family. Noah kissed me immediately after, apparently feeling like it was the thing to do.

When I opened my gift from Reed, my breath caught in my throat.

“A laptop?” My mouth dropped open with shock. “Reed, this is too much.”

“No, it’s . . . just say you love it.”

“I
do
love it, but—”

“Good. You need it for your school work, and now you can email your friend April without having to go to the library. I got you Internet service, too.”

“Ivy,” Grace asked, “You’re taking classes?”

I nodded. “It’ll take me forever, but I decided to start working on an English degree.”

“That’s wonderful. I’m so proud of you.”

“So am I,” Reed’s father Henry said. “Good for you, Ivy.”

Henry had never spoken to me, and I could tell he was trying to make a start.

“Thank you,” I said. “My friend Walter kind of inspired me to do it.”

We stayed at Reed’s parents’ house til almost midnight. Noah was playing with the other kids and I was getting to know the rest of his family. Even when my mom was alive, I’d never been around a big family. It felt good to be with the Lockharts.

Noah fell asleep on the way home and Reed carried him inside and put him to bed. I was yawning in the living room when he walked out of the bedroom.

“I’ll go so you can get to bed,” he said.

I approached him and wrapped my arms around his waist. “Can you stay for a little bit?” I asked softly. “We haven’t had any time alone today.”

“Yeah, I can stay a little longer. Mason went to my place to let Snoop out earlier.”

I snuggled against his chest, resting my cheek on the soft fabric of his flannel. “You smell like potatoes,” I said.

“You smell like pumpkin pie. It’s kinda sexy.”

I laughed and untucked the back of his shirt, running my hands up over his bare skin. He pulled me tightly against him and I looked up at his face.

“You know what I’ve noticed?” he said, brushing his thumb over my jaw line.

“Mmm?” I said, closing my eyes and moaning softly as he gently cupped the back of my neck.

“You like it when I touch you. It doesn’t matter where it is.” My eyes fluttered open as he traced the pad of his thumb across my lips. “You like me touching you slowly and gently, especially if we’re standing or you’re on top of me. The only thing that ruins it is if you feel overpowered by me.”