Desired (24 page)

Hell, he anticipated his own.

To him, it seemed he’d been waiting too long for this moment. To touch her in the dungeon. To make love to her in Club Sin. To show off her beauty to all its members. To own Ella. To possess her soul. To command her pleasure.

His control failed him.

Ella’s flowery scent and the musky aroma of their lovemaking swept through his nostrils as he lifted the chain to her mouth. “Open.” He settled the chain onto her tongue and added, “Close your lips. Don’t release that.”

Her breath sounded rough through her nose as he grasped the silk at her sides. Gripping it tight in his hands, he shifted the rhythm of his hips, both with force and speed. In and out, his cock moved within her tight cunt, and he forced himself to keep looking at her.

With a soft moan that brushed across his sweaty body, her eyes rolled back into her head and she shuddered. Each pounding thrust into her, skin slapped against skin, and he knew she’d experience a ripping sensation of pleasure through her nipples.

Intensifying the moment, he pinched her clit, forcing her to ride the wave of pleasure mixed with low levels of discomfort. Heat flicked through him as his pelvis slapped against her sexy ass, and his cock disappeared inside her wet cunt.

He squeezed her clit, flooding her with sensation. She gasped seconds before she held her breath. Her silence was a telling sign of her climax. The contractions of her inner walls around his hard penis nearly made him cross-eyed. Forcing himself to remain aware, he waited for her face to flush deep in color before he released her clit.

One second passed.

Then Ella was screaming and shuddering.

Her nipples were being stretched as she soared into climax. The sheer force of her orgasm rushed into him with a heat wave, leaving him unable to refuse his desires. His jaw clenched against the burn riding him, and he roared as the first drop of cum shot from his cock. With a growl, he yanked out of her warm, wet heat, and he gripped his cock. He pumped, hard and fast, shooting his seed onto her pretty, hot cunt.

His to mark
.

His to claim
.

Bucking and jerking, he grunted with each pulse his cock endured. He gripped the silk
tight, attempting to maintain his strength. By the time his cock emptied, he stood solidly on his feet and lifted his gaze to hers.

Hooded eyelids returned his stare, and a satisfied smile crossed her face.

He arched a brow. “Mine to decorate, Ella?”

Her gaze flicked to his semen on her sex before those dozy eyes returned to his. “Yes, sir,” she whispered with the chain between her teeth.

He reached for the chain, slowly dropping it to her stomach, and she whimpered. Tucking a finger under her chin, he lowered his gaze to her eye level. “Do as I ask and this will be just fine.”

She winced.

Perhaps her BDSM book told her that there was a downside to nipple clamps. He grasped the clip on her left breast and gently lowered the ring down, letting the tension out of the clamp. Holding the clamp steady, ready to remove, he instructed, “Take a deep breath, then very slowly release it.”

As she did as told, he removed the clamp, and her piercing gasp echoed in his ears. He immediately dropped his mouth onto her nipple, laving away the pain with long sucks. She shuddered beneath him. He suspected both in pleasure from her very tender nipple and now partly in pain.

Nipple clamps were a bitch coming off.

Once she stopped hissing, he said without looking at her, “Again. Breathe in. Out very slowly.” She obliged him, and once he got the clamp off, he again eased the ache with slow licks until she relaxed.

Leaving her there, he placed the clamps on the tray, and then looked to her. Her head rested against her arm in the restraints, and her eyes were unfocused. Satisfied. Her breath came out in long, slow intervals, and a small smile curved her lips.

She said nothing.

She didn’t move.

“A boneless, fucked-into-silence submissive.” He grinned, tracing the line of her bottom lip. “Doesn’t get much better than that, sweetheart.”

“When I was twelve, I pissed my pants at school.”

Feeling dazed, Ella struggled to push up from the warmth of Kyler’s arms. Wrapped in a black fuzzy blanket, she leaned her head against the couch they sat on, facing him. Unsure if she’d heard him right or if her mind was too lost in the overload of sensations, she asked, “You did
what
?”

The soft strands of his hair fell over his brow, his eyes lit with an inner glow. “That was my most embarrassing moment in my life. We were playing football outside and I was dumb thinking I could hold it. But I got tackled, and, well, it sort of just came out.”

“You peed your pants?” She laughed.

He chuckled and nodded. “In front of the entire school, pretty much. I never thought I would get over that. I remember coming home from school in tears to my mother. And you know what she told me?”

“What?”

His mouth twitched. “You could have crapped yourself. That would have been worse.”

“I suppose she’s right.” Ella snickered, rubbing her knees against his thigh, still feeling a bit off. Her mind was hazy, almost numb. She wondered after reading about a BDSM scene and seeing it in Club Sin how she’d feel. After mulling it over, she felt almost nothing. An easy sensation that was most welcomed.

Quiet
.

Orgasms gave a euphoric glow, but
this
was different. Life-altering different.

Kyler watched her as he slid his fingers through her hair, playing with the strands. “Once, though, I remember my mother being royally pissed at me.”

God, how he touched her; so sweet, so surely, so perfectly. “What happened?”

His gaze followed his fingers trailing through her hair, then his eyes met hers. “I broke a girl’s heart.”

“When?”

“I was seventeen.” Continuing to play with her hair as if it pleased him far more than it
did her, his gaze became distant, lost in a memory. “I dated a girl in high school who was the daughter of one of my dad’s cop buddies. At that time I thought more with my cock than with anything else.” He blinked, his eyes sharpening. “When I met another girl who was, let’s say … was a bit easier with the boys, I dumped my girlfriend for the other one.”

Didn’t all teenage boys do stupid stuff like that? “Your parents found out about it, I take it?”

He inclined his head. “My girlfriend went home in tears. I remember my dad smacking me upside the head and telling me that I’d grow up to regret that I’d hurt her.” He sighed, twining her hair around his finger. “And he was right. I did. But it was probably one of the most important lessons I’d ever learned from him. Actions cause regrets. It’s something I’ve been cautious of since that day.”

Oddly enough, she couldn’t picture Kyler as that boy, so careless of a woman’s feelings. “You have a lot of regrets?”

“Not a lot, but some.”

How he shared so easily touched something cold inside her, making her warm, regardless of the words he said. Besides, the shame of the actions shone in the hard lines of his face. “Can you tell me another regret?”

Brows drawn together, he hesitated and then said, “Before I became a Dom and learned control, I went through a stage where I didn’t want girlfriends, but wanted as many women as I could get in my bed.”

A frown pulled on her mouth. “I’m guessing with that smile you achieved that goal.”

“Yeah, I did.” His features were cold. The disgust evident in his voice. “There was one girl. I’d met her during police academy, and I knew she liked me. She’d always flirt, trying to get close to me. One night, I weaseled my way into her bed and left her there as if she was nothing more than something for me to stick my dick into.”

“You hurt her?”

He nodded, rubbing Ella’s thigh gently. “Incredibly so, I imagine. I think of her sometimes and hope that she found someone to love her. She was far too good for me at the time.”

Ella had never met the Kyler he spoke of now. She couldn’t imagine him treating a woman with such disrespect. “Well, you learned from your mistakes and changed your ways.”

Oh, how he’d grown as a man.

He watched his fingers swirl over her leg beneath the blanket. “It wasn’t until I joined my old BDSM club did all that reckless behavior stop. I learned there the meaning of being a man and to cherish a woman.”

She stared at him, at this
incredible man
, then said, “After meeting your family, I’d say your father had a hand in that, too.” All his brothers seemed to be incredible dads to their kids. They were involved and attentive, and to their wives, they all appeared sweet and caring.

A soft smile curved Kyler’s mouth. “I suspect so, but becoming a Dom just centered me in a way that likely would’ve taken a lot longer to discover without the lifestyle.”

She pondered that, gazing out to the club, and watching others fulfill their most erotic desires. More and more, she was beginning to think Club Sin was Eden. And now she was a part of something that special, too. She turned to Kyler. “Is that why you’re always so vocal about everything?”

“I never want misunderstandings, and with women”—he dipped his chin, giving his heart stopping grin—“there is always room for misunderstandings.”

“Why?” she retorted with a snort. “Because we’re emotional?”

“Because I can’t read women as well as I’d like to, so communication is important. It’s the key not to allow misunderstandings to rise up and fuel emotions in a negative way.”

Ella became trapped in that all-consuming stare of his, and a warm comfort enveloped her. She craved to spill all of her past to him. Her heartbreak. Her fears. Her pain. Kyler seemed like the one person who would listen and understand. He wouldn’t judge her. In fact, she suspected he’d do the opposite and commend her for leaving Rory. But why dredge up the past and talk about things that just didn’t matter anymore?

“You’re strong.”

She blinked, pulled out from her deep thoughts. “Pardon?”

“You, Ella”—his emotion-filled gaze held hers—“are one of the strongest women I’ve ever met.”

She rolled her eyes. “You hardly know me.”

“I know all I need to.” He cupped her face, the warmth of his hands spreading across her skin. “I know that you’re a fighter who goes after a better life for herself, even though you’ve come from a hard past. I know that you’re a person who craves to be happy and accepts strange
challenges to make it happen. I don’t need to know anything else but that to see the strength that resides inside you.”

Tears welled in her eyes, but she fought them. “You’re not trying to make me cry, are you?”

“No, just voicing what I think.” He shook his head, stroking her cheek. “And those tears in your eyes tell me that you needed to hear it.”

She snuggled into him and he wrapped his arms around her. There, she felt so safe. So understood. So accepted. Why had she been fighting this with him? He’d proven, time and time again, that he simply wanted to care for her.

All of her.

Part of her regretted the distance she’d kept. The other part was so damn tired about feeling bad about things. He wanted her with him. She wanted to stay. Knowing he craved closeness and wanting that, too, she asked, “Want to hear my most embarrassing moment?”

He tucked her finger under her chin. His gaze became focused. “Please share.”

While Rory was all types of embarrassing and painful, she didn’t want to go there. She wanted to stay in this happy present, not return to a painful past. But she owed Kyler truths.

A lot of them.

She stared out to the submissive getting flogged whose head was tossed back as moans of ecstasy poured from her mouth. “The very worst painful memory is actually one of my most embarrassing ones, too.”

He stayed silent.

She moved off him and leaned her head against the couch, wrapping the blanket tighter around her shoulder. “When I was told my parents had died in the plane accident, the police thought it’d be a good idea to tell me when I was at school. Which, I’m sure you can imagine, it wasn’t.” Slight coldness shivered through her as she went on. “I ran out of the office and the bell had just rung, so the hallways where packed with students. Halfway down the hallway, reality set in, and before I knew it, I had dropped to my knees and threw up all over the floor.”

Kyler frowned. “I’d hardly call that embarrassing, more so an understandable reaction.”

“Tell that to a little girl,” she retorted. “I never wanted to go back to school. And luckily for me, my grandparents lived in another state, so I didn’t have to.”

He brushed his fingers down her arm over the top of the blanket, regarding her with a
long look. “You never went back there? Never faced any of those kids again?”

“Nope.”
Hell to the no
. “No way could I face that humiliation. Being known as the girl who barfed in the hallway.”

“People are more understanding than you think. When I had that incident at school, sure, I got razzed a bit, but for the most part it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would’ve been. Kids moved on to someone else who did something stupid and joked about that.”

She snorted. “I’d rather just push the memory far from my mind and not remember it.”

“Ah, but Ella,” he said slowly, with a knowing twinkle in his eye, “stuff like that always has a way of coming back to us. You can’t run from those experiences. They are what define you.”

“Me, puking on the floor defines me?” she scoffed.

“You picking yourself up off the ground and moving forward is what defines you. Being sick just means you loved deeply, and there is nothing wrong with that.”

There is that
.

Funny how she’d never looked it at that way, but with her life full of hard times, if she could avoid any more, she would. That simple.

He stayed silent, clearly content with what she shared, so she turned to a paddling scene in her line of vision. The Dom had a woman locked into the stocks and smacked her bottom with a black paddle, turning her skin a bright shade of red. Not that Ella would complain about her scene with Kyler, it was incredible, but it also wasn’t what she’d seen anyone else in Club Sin do.