Determined To Live (3 page)

"He
always answers prayers, Jake. But sometimes He says, "No"
and He always has a reason. And
sometimes
it takes a while to know what that reason is. Then there are times He
decides we just don't
need
to know. "

Jake shakes his
head. "Unbelievable. You religious people drive me crazy!"

"Religious?
Hardly. I'm a
Christian
,
Jake. There's a difference. But honestly, I don't really give a damn
what you think."

"If you're
such a Christian, why don't you act all perfect and shit?"

"Because
I'm
not
perfect, only
He
is. When I'm dead, I'll have to face Him and deal with every single
thing I've ever done that I haven't asked forgiveness for. But all
the things I
have
done and asked genuine forgiveness for - and of course, have never
intentionally done again - it's all gone, like it never happened.
Every bit of it. He won't bring it up and neither will I. And believe
me, neither one of us wants to go through all the crap I've done
wrong in my life."

I look over at Jake
and when I see his cocky arrogant grin, I have to force myself not to
smack it off his pretty face. Instead, I decide to let him in on some
information about me that just might do it without the need to become
physical.

"Before all
this zombie bullshit started, I was a Sunday School
teacher
,
Jake."

I slowly produce my
own cocky grin as I savor the satisfaction of seeing his eyes bug
out, his jaw drop, and the irritating cockiness is replaced by shock.
.

He recovers
slightly and lets out a short nervous bark of laughter. "Those
are probably some seriously screwed up people!" He laughs again,
but louder and longer.

Oh, bullshit!

Ok yeah,
probably.

"I was a
teacher for the little kids, through third grade."

Jake's
laughter turns into a loud gasp. "You gotta be freakin'
kidding
me! Who the hell would want
you
teaching their kids? Didn't they
know
you? Were they crazy?"

I look over at Jake
and picture his head falling off his shoulders. When my mind fails to
make that happen, I give him the finger and turn back to the road.

He bursts out in
laughter and my irritation rises as he slaps the dash, stomps his
feet on the floorboard, and holds his stomach. His eyes are streaming
tears and I really can't figure out what was so hilarious to deserve
that kind of reaction. I don't say a word to the damn fool. I don't
need to, because when he notices the shiny black gun laying I'm my
lap with one hand wrapped around the grip and my finger on the
trigger, he quite suddenly stops laughing.

After a few
sobering moments of silence, Jake says,"Tell ya what, if
your
God answers a prayer from someone like me, then I'll take a serious
look at the Bible and listen to what you have to say. Until then,
forget it. I don't want to hear any more shit about it and I don't
want to talk about it."

I nod once in
agreement and continue driving, looking for Will. Jake searches for
Will on his side without a word.
Or
at least, I hope he's searching.

A couple minutes
later, Jake turns back to me and says, "So I guess this is the
big Armageddon thing then, huh?" He rolls his eyes and shakes
his head.

Thought you
didn't want to talk about it, Jake?

"Actually,
no, I can guarantee you it's not. If it were, my parents and my Ma
would definitely not be here. This is
man
-made.
People are stupid and do incredibly stupid things sometimes." I
look him up and down and say, "I know a few people like that."

"Ha,
ha. You're just so freaking hilarious," he says, then furthers
his opinion by sticking his tongue out at me! "Alright, here's
my prayer - God, if you're
really
there, then let us find Will in
this
town, in the next ten minutes. Not
eleven
minutes, ten." Jake grins at me. "Let's see your God pull
this one off."

"You're an
idiot, Jake. I have a Bible inside my suitcase that you're more than
welcome to use. I'll get it for you just as soon as we find whoever
has my truck," I tell him.

Jake
laughs his stupid cocky laugh again and says, "In your dreams.
He hasn't answered my prayer and he's not going to. I
told
you the only way I'll read it is if He answers my prayer, and He sure
as hell hasn't answered it yet!"

"Hey dumbass,
look on top of the bank building."

Jake looks up at
the old two-story brick building and smacks his head on the
windshield when he jumps in surprise.

"Oh...holy...
shit
,"
he says softly and with bulging wide-eyes. He slowly turns his head
my way and gulps loudly.

In a quiet tone
filled with amazement he says, "I guess I
will
need that Bible."

I stop and get out
of the truck, balancing on one foot until Jake hands me my crutches.
Grabbing my gun, I stick it in the front waistband of my fatigue
pants, which have become a little loose.

I pray the gun
doesn't fall down inside my pants and then I move toward the
building. Jake joins me, and side-by-side we walk toward the bank and
my husband.

Actually he
walks and I do the whole
broken-foot-so-I'm-stuck-using-these-damn-crutches routine
.

Will silently
watches us until we stop below him on the street.

"Well, isn't
this nice? My wife and her lover together again. What the hell are
you doing here? Come to tell me everything Sara said and
showed
me, isn't
true
?
That a damn
picture
is
lying
?
I'm not an idiot, so don't even try giving me that shit. Just go away
and leave me alone; I don't want a damn thing to do with either of
you!"

As Jake keeps
watch, I call up to my husband, "Will, number one, you
are
an idiot if you believe that damn picture is real. I know you aren't
much into computers - or technology at all for that matter - but
pretty much
anyone
can fake a photo; it's not just the tabloids now. And there are also
ways - most of the time - to
tell
when a photo
is
a fake.
This
particular one has some major issues, which you would have seen if
you had bothered to take the time to really look at it. Thanks for
the opportunity to defend myself, you damn jerk! But I get it. I
understand why you would think the worst. The way Jake and I have
been acting makes it pretty easy for you to believe someone like Sara
- and her supposed "
proof
"
- especially since you were already suspicious of us. But we did
not
have sex."

Ok, so it was
close. Alright,
very
close. But close isn't actually
doing
it...right? Besides, everyone thought he was dead! Oh my god, why am
I even trying to defend myself to you right now? I don't have time
for this shit!

Amazingly, Jake
speaks up and also insists that we hadn't had sex -
which
is great...if he had stopped there. But no, he just can't keep his
damn mouth shut, and he damn sure isn't going to waste an opportunity
to antagonize Will.

"Of course, it
damn sure wasn't from lack of trying on my part. She
claims
to love you, or some dumb shit like that - not sure
why,
since your stupid ass keeps running off. But keep your ass up there,
I'll be more than happy to take your place. I loved kissing your wife
and once you're out of the way, she won't miss you for long. I'll
make sure of that."

"You son of a
bitch!" Will shouts down.

I swing around and
glare at Jake. "Not freaking helping, stupid! I know you're
trying to piss him off so he comes down, but...
just
shut up
!" I hiss at
him.

At least, I
thought
that's what he was doing - but when he raises one eyebrow, grins, and
softly says where only he and I can hear,
"Is that what I was doing? I'll have to make things clearer next
time" -
I realize I
might have been wrong.

I stare at him,
shocked and speechless -
though
I shouldn't have been. It's Jake, after all.
I turn and lift my head back up to Will, taking several seconds to
remember what I was going to say.

Oh. Yeah.

"And number
two, we most certainly will
not
be going away and leaving you alone. At least,
I
won't. You're still my husband, I love
you,
Will,"
- I give a quick pointed glare at Jake, who rolls his eyes in
response -
"and I'm
damn sure not going to just walk away or let you go without one hell
of a fight. You can run all you want, you can hide like a freakin'
child if you want, but I'm coming after you. And I
will
find you. Yes, I believed you were gone once and left you behind, but
that sure as hell won't happen again." I take a breath and look
around. "Will, there are
thousands
of zombies that will be here any minute. If you don't come down,
you'll just have to watch as they kill me, because I'm staying right
here."

Jake quickly swings
his head in my direction and says, "Wha― The
hell
you are!"

"So what's it
going to be, Will? Does
Jake
really care more about me than you do?"
I
ignore Jake when he says he does, again only loud enough for me to
hear.
"I freaking
know better so get your ass down here...
and
hurry the hell up.
I can
hear them!"

I see Will look
behind him in the direction of the highway, and then I hear a loud
shout come from the roof. "Son of a bitch!" he shouts
again, then looks back down at us.

"Jake, get her
back to the truck.
Hurry!
I'm coming down, honey.
Please
get in the truck."

Confident he's
really coming down, I focus my attention on the sounds of the undead.

I won't lie, I'm
scared to death!

I freeze, wasting
precious seconds thinking I can't possibly make it in time, instead
of actually moving my ass and trying to.

"Canada,
get back to the truck...
now
!
It takes you forever to move with those damn crutches and these
things are
fast
,
remember?" Jake needlessly reminds me.

I nod and start
back to the truck. My body trembles with so much fear that my arms
seem too weak to move the crutches. I start off slowly because of
that, but when the grunts of the undead grow louder, I find some
inner strength fueled by terror. And of course, it's the perfect time
to fall when my crutch slips on the edge of the curb.

Down I go.

Typical.

The sound of the
crutches slamming on the pavement and my short scream when I fall
alerts Jake, who runs over to where I'm struggling to stand back up.
He helps me to my feet again, and when I raise my head, my heart
jumps into my throat.

"Jake! Run!"
I give him a push toward the truck, but he resists.

"Come on,
Canada! Get moving, now! That's an order," he shouts at me.

And exactly
what
does he plan to do if I disobey? Throw me in the brig?

Dumbass!

I'm going as fast
as I can but - apparently - it's not fast enough for Jake because he
swoops me up in his arms and practically throws me inside the truck.
My eyes scan the area around the building for Will, but he's nowhere
to be seen!