Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Big Shot (Book 16)
Read Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Big Shot (Book 16) Online
Authors: Jeff Kinney
BOOK: Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Big Shot (Book 16)
6.75Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
PUFFIN BOOKS
DIARY OF A WIMPY KID
The Third Wheel
Hard Luck
The L
ong Haul
ong Haul
Old School
Double Down
The Getaway
The Meltdown
W
recking Ball
recking Ball
The Deep E
nd
nd
Big Sho
t
t
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
The Wimpy Kid Do-
It-
Y
our
self Book
It-
Y
our
self Book
The Wimpy Kid Movie Diar
y
y
The Wimpy Kid Movie Diar
y: The Next Chapter
y: The Next Chapter
Diar
y of an Awesome Friendly Kid: Rowley Jeff
er
son’
s Journal
y of an Awesome Friendly Kid: Rowley Jeff
er
son’
s Journal
Rowley Jefferson’s Awesome F
r
iendly Adventure
r
iendly Adventure
Rowley Jefferson’s Awesome F
r
iendly Spooky Stories
r
iendly Spooky Stories
THE
DIAR
Y OF A WIMPY K
ID
SERIES
DIAR
Y OF A WIMPY K
ID
SERIES
MORE FR
OM THE
WIMPY
W
ORLD
OM THE
WIMPY
W
ORLD
Diar
y of a Wimpy Kid
y of a Wimpy Kid
Rodrick Rules
The Last Str
aw
aw
Dog Days
The Ugly T
ruth
ruth
Cabin Fever
by Jeff Kinney
PUFFIN
PUFFIN BOOKS
UK | USA | Canada | Ireland |
Australia
Australia
India | New Zealand | South
Africa
Africa
Puffin Books is part of the Penguin Random House group of companies whose
First published in the English language in the USA
by
Amulet Books,
an imprint of
ABRAMS,
2021
Amulet Books,
an imprint of
ABRAMS,
2021
Original English title:
Diar
y of a
Wimpy Kid:
Big Shot
Diar
y of a
Wimpy Kid:
Big Shot
(All rights reserved in all countries by Harry N.
Abrams,
Inc
.)
Abrams,
Inc
.)
Published simultaneously in Gr
eat Britain by Puffin Books 2021
eat Britain by Puffin Books 2021
Wimpy Kid text and illustrations cop
yright ©
Wimpy Kid,
Inc.,
2021
yright ©
Wimpy Kid,
Inc.,
2021
DIAR
Y OF
A
WIMPY KID®,
WIMPY KID™ and the Greg Heffley design™
Y OF
A
WIMPY KID®,
WIMPY KID™ and the Greg Heffley design™
and the design of the book’
s cover ar
e trademarks and
s cover ar
e trademarks and
trade dress of
Wimp
y Kid,
Inc.
All rights reserved.
Wimp
y Kid,
Inc.
All rights reserved.
Used with permission and gratitude.
Book design by Jeff Kinne
y
y
Cover design b
y Jeff Kinney and Br
enda E.
Angelilli
y Jeff Kinney and Br
enda E.
Angelilli
The moral right of the author/illustrator has been asserted
ISBN:
978–0–241–39700–8
978–0–241–39700–8
t
O will and g
rant
O will and g
rant
T
O WILL AND G
RANT
O WILL AND G
RANT
S
EP
TEM
BER
EP
TEM
BER
Monday
I’ve heard
that athletes
are born
with special
that athletes
are born
with special
genes that
make them
good at
sports. Well,
make them
good at
sports. Well,
whatever those
genes are,
I guess
I was
born
genes are,
I guess
I was
born
WITHOUT
them.
them.
Mom’s always
saying that
everyone who’s
part of
saying that
everyone who’s
part of
a team
has an
important role
to play.
But when
has an
important role
to play.
But when
it comes
to sports
it seems
like my
job is
to make
to sports
it seems
like my
job is
to make
everybody
ELSE
look good.
ELSE
look good.
At this point in my life, I’m pretty sure I’m not
gonna grow up to become a professional athlete.
So I’m officially announcing my retirement.
1
2
The
crazy
thing
is,
I
used
to
actually
LIKE
sports.
crazy
thing
is,
I
used
to
actually
LIKE
sports.
But that
was back
in pre-school, when
sports were
was back
in pre-school, when
sports were
still
FUN
. The first sport I
ever played was
FUN
. The first sport I
ever played was
soccer. I didn’t know
the rules, but neither
did
the rules, but neither
did
any of the other
kids. So most of
the time it was
kids. So most of
the time it was
just pure chaos on
the field.
the field.
Wherever the ball went,
we all chased after
it.
we all chased after
it.
Every once in a
while the ball would
pop out
while the ball would
pop out
of the pack and
go into someone’s goal,
then
go into someone’s goal,
then
EVER
Y
ONE
would celebrate.
Y
ONE
would celebrate.
3
Nobody kept score, so you never knew who was
winning or losing. And the parents didn’t care
because they were too busy doing their own thing.
The referees were middle-school kids, and they
didn
’t re
ally pay attention to the game, either.
’t re
ally pay attention to the game, either.
4
In fact, the refs didn’t even blow their whistles
when the ball went out of bounds. So half the
time we’d be playing on the wrong field and didn’t
KNOW
it.
it.
After the game, we’d always get slushies and
junk food at the snack shack. And sometimes we
wouldn’t even wait for the game to be
O
VER
to
O
VER
to
treat ourselves.
5
The coaches were really
nice and made sure everyone
nice and made sure everyone
got a chance to
score. And that made everyone
score. And that made everyone
feel good about themselves.
Back then, I was
SURE
I was gonna grow up
SURE
I was gonna grow up
to be a professional soccer player. I even kept my
rookie card in mint condition in case it turned out
to be worth something one day.
6
But when we got to kindergarten, everything
CHANGED
. The refs started using their
. The refs started using their
whistles, and they didn’t let us do the kinds of
things we got away with the year before.
That season, the refs blew their whistles almost
every time I touched the ball. So when I was in
the game I’d stand in the corner of the field and
pray the ball didn’t roll to me.
7
It’s not like I was getting a lot of playing time
in kindergarten anyway. T
he coach only put in
he coach only put in
the kids who were
G
OOD
, and the rest
of us sat
G
OOD
, and the rest
of us sat
on the bench.
Mom told me the
reason the coach wasn’t
playing
reason the coach wasn’t
playing
me was because I
was his “secret weapon”
and he
was his “secret weapon”
and he
was saving me for
a big moment.
a big moment.
But I didn’t understand
that Mom was just
that Mom was just
trying to make me
feel better about myself.
So
feel better about myself.
So
whenever the coach
DID
put me in the
game I’d
DID
put me in the
game I’d
go out there thinking
I was hot stuff.
I was hot stuff.
8
Even the snack shack
wasn’t fun that year.
Some
wasn’t fun that year.
Some
parents complained that they
were selling too much
were selling too much
junk food, so they replaced the slushies and other
sugary treats with
H
E
A
LT
H
Y
options.
H
E
A
LT
H
Y
options.
But the slushie sales from the snack shack paid
for the field upkeep. So that year the parks
department could only afford to mow the grass
once every three weeks, which really slowed the
games down.
9
After a bunch of kids got tick bites from playing
soccer in the long grass, they decided to end the
season early, which was totally fine with
ME
.
ME
.
I feel
bad that
I’ve never
been good
at sports,
bad that
I’ve never
been good
at sports,
because I
think Dad
was hoping
I’d be
a star
think Dad
was hoping
I’d be
a star
athlete. Whenever
he’d go
to the
library, he’d
he’d go
to the
library, he’d
always come
home with
a stack
of sports
books.
home with
a stack
of sports
books.
10
I’m sure there are kids who are into those types
of stories, but that was never
ME
.
ME
.
If you go to the library, you’
ll find all sorts of
ll find all sorts of
books about kids who do amazing things and lead
their teams to victory. But I never had any
experiences like that, and I’
ll bet there are lots
ll bet there are lots
of kids out there just like me.
11
So one of these days somebody should write a bo
ok
ok
for the
R
E
ST
of us.
R
E
ST
of us.
It’s not like I’ve
got anything against sports.
got anything against sports.
I like them just
fine, as long as
I’m not the one
fine, as long as
I’m not the one
PL
A
YING
. In fact, this summer I watched
the
A
YING
. In fact, this summer I watched
the
Olympics on
TV
pretty
much non-stop.
TV
pretty
much non-stop.
It was Mom’s idea
for us to watch
the Games as a
for us to watch
the Games as a
family. She
says that
these days
everyone’s in
their
says that
these days
everyone’s in
their
own little bubble,
and sport
is one of
the only
and sport
is one of
the only
things that can still
bring people together. But
I
bring people together. But
I
think a little togetherness
goes a long way.
goes a long way.
12
Mom says she loves the Olympics because they show
what human beings are capable of at their best.
But I like watching for the
BL
OOP
ER
S
.
BL
OOP
ER
S
.
I’m just glad it’s
somebody
ELSE
out there and
somebody
ELSE
out there and
not
ME
. Because I’m
sure I’d be nervous if I
ME
. Because I’m
sure I’d be nervous if I
knew there were millions
of people watching from
of people watching from
home
. And when you mess up in the Olympics
. And when you mess up in the Olympics
you’re supposed to act graceful about it.
13
But i
f I just spent four years of my life training
f I just spent four years of my life training
an
d th
en
made
some dumb
mistake,
I’m pretty
d th
en
made
some dumb
mistake,
I’m pretty
sure
I’d have
trouble smiling
for
the cameras
.
I’d have
trouble smiling
for
the cameras
.
That’s why I’d do one of those sports where
you’re part of a
TEAM
. Because then, when you
TEAM
. Because then, when you
screw up, it’s harder for people to tell.
14
In fact, if I was in the Olympics, I’d be in
one of those events where a
H
O
RS
E
is involved.
H
O
RS
E
is involved.
Because then if something goes wrong, at least
you’d have someone to
BLA
ME
.
BLA
ME
.
But now
that
I
think about
it,
that’s
probably the
that
I
think about
it,
that’s
probably the
reason why
horses
sometimes
play up.
horses
sometimes
play up.
15
Even
though
we
watched
a
lot
of
Olympics coverage,
though
we
watched
a
lot
of
Olympics coverage,
I
still
don’t
understand
the
way
everything
works.
still
don’t
understand
the
way
everything
works.
For one
thing, I
don’t see
why they
only hand
thing, I
don’t see
why they
only hand
out medals to
the
athletes who
take
the
top three
the
athletes who
take
the
top three
spots in
a
competition.
It seems
to
me l
ike
they
a
competition.
It seems
to
me l
ike
they
could keep going with
the medals so
E
V
ER
Y
O
NE
the medals so
E
V
ER
Y
O
NE
goes home
with
a
prize.
with
a
prize.
The way it is right now, they give you a gold
medal if you take first place, silver if you take
second, and bronze if you take third. But I feel
like there’s a pretty big step down between silver
and bronze.
At least gold and silver are
W
OR
TH
something.
W
OR
TH
something.
But if you won a bronze medal you’d be lucky to
get a few bucks for it.
I figure
the moment your medal
is the most
valuable
the moment your medal
is the most
valuable
is right
after you
WIN
it.
So, if I
got one, I’d
after you
WIN
it.
So, if I
got one, I’d
try to
take advantage of the
TV
audience and
take advantage of the
TV
audience and
find a
buyer.
buyer.
17
During the medal ceremony they have the top
three athletes stand on a podium, and then they
play the gold medallist’s national anthem and make
the other two athletes stand there an
d li
ste
n.
d li
ste
n.
But
if I took
silver or bronze I’d pop in some
if I took
silver or bronze I’d pop in some
earb
uds so I
could jam to my
own tunes.
uds so I
could jam to my
own tunes.
One of Mom’s favourite things about the Olympics
is when they tell
the life stories of the
athletes
the life stories of the
athletes
who are competing. Some of the stories are really
inspiring,
because a lot of these athletes had to
because a lot of these athletes had to
overcome tough challenges to get where they are.
Other books
Cat on a Hot Tiled Roof by Anna Nicholas
The Man From Her Past by Anna Adams
A Voyage For Madmen by Peter Nichols
Complete Works of Lewis Carroll by Lewis Carroll
The Beats in Rift by Ker Dukey
Celtic Tales of Enchantment by Liam Mac Uistin
The Doctor Is In by Carl Weber
Love Is Fear by Hanson, Caroline
Auto-da-fé by Elias Canetti
