Divine Phoenix (14 page)

Clay withdrew his softening cock. “I’ll be right back.” He disposed of the condom and crawled back into bed. In the dark, Lily smiled as she snuggled up to him, wishing it could be like this every night.

“Lily?”

“Hmm?”

“You know this wasn’t a one-night stand, right?”

Lily stroked his chest as she curled closer, a lump forming in her throat. “I know, Clay. It’s going to take me some time. I need to put my failed marriage behind me. There are…” It hurt to keep the truth from him, but she had no choice. “There are things I need to take care of. Things I need to do, before…”

“I know. Take your time, Lily. Can you sleep?” Thunder rumbled, this time in the distance.

She sniffled and her laugh was a little broken sounding. “After that? Try to stop me.”

The concern in his voice was clear as he lifted his head to look at her. “Lily? You want to talk about it? Did I hurt you?”

Shaking her head, Lily replied, “You didn’t hurt me, Clay. I promise. That was the most beautiful lovemaking I’ve ever experienced.”
And I have to pull away from doing it again.
The thought made her heart ache.
But not until the morning.
“I’m confused by how I feel and I’m not sure talking would help right now. You need your sleep.” She knew if she kept talking she would cry again.

As if he sensed her pulling away emotionally, Clay squeezed her tightly and kissed her temple but didn’t try to reestablish greater intimacy by kissing her lips. His understanding made the pain in her chest worse. “I’m right here if you change your mind. You need me to set my alarm?”

“No. I’ll wake up.” Lily rarely slept through the night and was used to getting up before the sun had risen.

Clay stretched as he woke up, instantly aware of the warm, curvy body snuggled next to him. He smiled as he took in the sight the early-morning light revealed. Her beautiful face was relaxed, and it was obvious that despite her usual habit of rising early that she was still deep asleep. That was a testimony to how exhausted she’d been

One arm was flung over her head, the hand curled around her pillow, and the other was out at her side. Even her delicate hands were beautiful in sleep. He resisted the urge to caress her full, rose-tipped breasts, which he’d enjoyed making love to so much the night before. The nipples were still pink tinged from his enjoyment and puckered in the cool morning air.

He couldn’t conceive why,
why
she didn’t want the lights on when they’d made love. Her body was his perfect ideal. Healthy, curvy, and so lush he wanted to nuzzle and kiss every inch of her skin. His hand itched to run his palm down her silky belly to the swell of her hip.

Carefully, like a naughty little boy reaching his hand into the cookie jar, Clay lifted the sheet away from where it lay just below her belly button. He loved the adorable little dip of her navel and wanted to kiss it, but then his blood ran cold as he took in the stark reality of the reason she’d wanted to hide her nudity from him.

He fisted the sheet silently, gritting his teeth as he got a clear view of just how extraordinarily sadistic and astoundingly cruel her ex-husband had been. He stared until the blood pounded in his ears.

The tattoo was the full width of her mound, started just above her hairline and extended upward about four inches. The black line work image was a grossly engorged woman’s genitalia with cum leaking from it. In bold, heavy lettering surrounding the image were the words “JT’s Fat Li’l Snatch.”

The worst part was that the tattoo was a
mirror
image. He’d had to look at it for few seconds before he’d deciphered it because of the contracted use of Lily’s name, probably her ex-husband’s idea of a clever play on words. JT had wanted Lily to see it and understand it every single time she looked in the damned mirror.

Knowing he needed to get out of the bed before he disturbed her sleep with his reaction, he carefully tucked the sheet and blanket over her and slipped from the room, grabbing sweats and a T-shirt on the way out.

He wanted to get in his truck, drive to Durst, and beat the life from that evil son of a bitch. Twelve years she’d spent with him. Twelve years…of
that
.

His perspective on her recovery shifted as he saw her accomplishments in a whole new light. The fact she could smile or interact with anyone, take charge of her future the way she had, make changes in her life…He felt beneath her. She took overcoming the odds to a whole new level.

He started the coffee and then the shower. While standing under the hot spray, he bit his lip until he tasted blood to keep from roaring in fury at what JT had done to her.

The realization dawned on him that she would be utterly devastated if she knew he’d seen the tattoo. She’d been very insistent about the lights being off, and it occurred to him that the tattoo could be the reason she’d backpedaled the night before. The intimacy had been palpable between them, and looking back he could almost pinpoint the moment she’d remembered the mark, retreating and making excuses for what had happened.

As much as it killed him, he wouldn’t make an issue of it if she backed away from him. He’d bide his time. He knew the attraction wasn’t one-sided and that she might have plans to remedy that mark.
Mark
. That was what JT had goaded him about in the hospital hallway and the reason she’d looked so pale when he’d returned to the room afterward. She’d probably been afraid—terrified of him finding out about it. He thought of all the times he’d called her “Lil” and wondered if it secretly bothered her. It angered him that her ex had probably ruined the nickname that he’d used for her since childhood.

He shut off the water and vowed to bite the bullet until she was ready to move forward with the relationship. After toweling dry, he dressed then padded barefoot to the kitchen and made breakfast. He was reading the local paper, all six pages of it, and was on his second cup of coffee when his Sleeping Beauty finally woke with a loud gasp and whimper.

His heart went out to her, and he wished he could go to her, tell her it was all right and that he’d help however she needed him to. But he couldn’t do that. Her budding self-esteem and confidence were worth more to him than that. He allowed her to keep her pride in place. He listened to the sounds as she searched the covers for her pajamas.

She wandered down the hall and peeked out at him, and the warm smile he gave her came straight from his heart, but he disciplined himself to stay in his chair.
Make it easier for her.
But he hoped for her to reach out for him. She seemed almost cautious when she came to the table and perched in a chair.

“Someone overslept a bit. I’m glad you were able to make up for the sleep you lost last night. How do you feel?” He posed the question tenderly so she would understand his deeper meaning.

She bit her delectable lower lip, then licked it and replied, “About that…” Clay’s heart ached when her lip trembled a little, but he sucked it up as she continued, “Thank you for being there for me. Um. Clay. I—”

It was nearly too hard to casually reach out and pat her hand. “I understand, Lily. It was a scary moment. It led to greater intimacy between us than you may be ready for. Believe me when I say I’d still be there for you again. We’ll treat it casually, for now.”

Lily swallowed loudly and nodded but didn’t seem relieved by his words. She almost seemed disappointed as she got up from the table and reached for a mug from the cupboard by the coffeemaker.

Two hours later, Clay was sitting at his workbench when Lily came in through the back door. “I finished my to-do list. Everyone I needed to call has been called.”

“Including the counselor?” Clay asked neutrally.

Lily nodded, causing her thick, dark curls to bob on her shoulders. “I set up an appointment for tomorrow afternoon. She had a cancellation and could fit me in.”

“Good.”

Tabitha pushed open the doors leading out to the showroom and said, “Lily, could I have your help please?”

“Sure, I’ll be right there,” Lily replied as she removed her coat and scarf and put her purse up.

Tabitha’s tone had hinted at her attitude, and Clay glanced at the security monitor as she returned to the showroom. Grace Warner entered the front door and made her way to the row of cases at the rear of the shop, the area they’d designated for local pickups of Internet orders. Tabitha never acknowledged her and kept her back to her the entire time. She must’ve seen Grace approaching the store and had “paged” Lily to handle her.

Clay laid the fine needle-nose pliers he’d been manipulating the silver wire with on the workbench. “Damn it, Tabitha.”

Lily stood beside him and looked at the monitor as he pointed at it and began to rise from his stool. She laid a restraining hand on his shoulder. Her touch was gentle and sure as she said, “Don’t get up. I’ll help Grace. This is the reason you have me, right?”

Clay smiled at Lily as she squeezed his shoulder and strode to the doors, humming “Mr. Know It All.” He’d observed that Lily got on well with all the customers and couldn’t understand why Tabitha treated Grace and a few select others like that.

He watched as Grace’s demeanor changed when she saw Lily. Grinning, he recalled her early assertion that Grace must be crazy for taking on three men. They’d gotten to be good friends over the past few weeks, which seemed to bug Tabitha to no end. Clay could’ve told her that Lily wasn’t just going to fall into goose step with her on all her issues.

Something caught his eye, and he noticed Lily rubbing her right knee and her shin. Grace must’ve asked about it because Lily waved her hand dismissively and stopped rubbing. She went behind the counter and produced the box containing the items Grace had ordered. Clay grinned, imagining her men’s expressions the first time they wore those for her all together and thought the woman could sell ice to Eskimos. Lily had that in common with her.

* * * *

“Grace, I was wondering if you’d give me a referral,” Lily said as she opened the box and discreetly showed Grace the three custom-sized silver cock rings she’d ordered.

Her blonde friend smiled as she admired each ring with a naughty grin. “Sure. What do you need?”

Lily laid a hand on the abundant mass of her long, thick brown hair. “I need to get my hair cut off and bet you know a good stylist. I also wondered if you’ve heard anything good about the new tattoo artist who’s moved into town
.”

Because that may be the better option for me. Just have to see how Clay feels about tattoos.

Grace grinned like a Cheshire cat. “You’re making all
kinds
of changes, aren’t you?”

JT had never allowed Lily to cut her hair, and she’d learned why, when he’d used it to tie her to their headboard and had left her that way all night. That hadn’t happened frequently, but she’d grown to secretly hate her hair. The one time she’d had it trimmed he’d made sure she’d regretted it. Consequently, she now carted around eleven years’ worth of growth.

“I don’t want to cut it short, but I would like to lose most of the length.”

Grace stroked a wayward lock of hair admiringly. “It is very long. Did you grow it out for Locks of Love?”

Lily shook her head.
I wish that was the reason.
“No, but I’d love to donate it to them.”

With easy assurance, Grace said, “Leslie at Madeleine’s can fix you up. As far as the new tattoo artist is concerned, both Maya Warner and I have actually met him and had a little work done.” With a twinkle in her eyes, Grace said, “I want to invite you to a little gathering where I could show you. Jack, Ethan, Adam, and all of our male friends who like to hunt go to a friend’s ranch in the Hill Country for a hog hunt after the holidays. He’s had trouble with feral hogs and they go every year to hunt and do ‘guy stuff.’ All of the wives, fiancées, and girlfriends come to our ranch and we do a girl’s sleepover. I know Jack invited Clay. Would you consider coming for the sleepover?”

A sleepover, with a bunch of women, most of whom she’d barely met. She wasn’t sure.

Grace must have seen her hesitation and said, “Come on. Maya will be there, so will Emma. You won’t be left out, I promise.” The eagerness in Grace’s eyes was hard to deny.

“All right. If Clay is going, I’ll go.” She hoped that was okay with Clay, recalling his easygoing acceptance of her words that morning. She wasn’t sure how she felt about his agreement to treat what they’d had the night before as something casual. It had felt anything but casual.

“Awesome! You’re also invited for the pig roast and bonfire we have at the ranch the weekend after the hunt. At the sleepover, Maya and I can show you our tattoos Seth Carter did for us. Something tells me it would be frowned upon for me to show you mine right now, considering where it is.” Grace glanced at Tabitha and added, “I’ve never known someone so thoroughly in need of a good orgasm, or two or three…hundred.”

Lily burst into giggles, and Grace joined her. Tabitha did not appear to approve of their display, judging by the way she tucked her chin into her neck and frowned as she bent over a display.

The doorbell jingled, and Lily glanced up to see who it was, then did a double take. Her heart leaped into her throat. “Would you excuse me for a second, Grace?”

“Sure.”

The ruggedly handsome man entered the shop, scanning from one corner to the next. His expression was serious, and he had an almost unapproachable aura, but was still pleasantly familiar to her. What she could see of his skin was all deeply tanned, and as he pulled off his stocking cap, she recognized his sandy-blond hair, which matched the scruff of a light beard and moustache on his face. Recognition occurred between them simultaneously as she looked into his gray-green eyes.

“Del?”

A wide smile slowly spread across his lips as he made a beeline for her across the store. “Lily?”

“Del!”

He caught her as she threw herself into his hug, his arms strong and solid as he lifted her just a bit off her feet and rocked her back and forth. He smelled like sunshine and man. He pressed his face to her neck and held her for a few seconds, and she basked in the quiet attention.

He murmured, “It is you, isn’t it, Lily Bell?”

He set her back on her feet, and her heart pounded with excitement as she looked up at him towering over her. “Are you going to keep calling me that?”

“Uh-huh.” She saw a glimpse of the irritating preteen he’d been in his teasing smile, calling her by that name just to piss her off. Funny thing was, it didn’t really bother her all that much. It never really had. She’d just pretended that it had because it gave them something to banter about. He hugged her again. “Damn, I missed you.”

Everything felt right in her world.

Lily heard the swinging doors open as Clay came out from the workroom. “I’m so happy you’re back safe and sound. Let me introduce you.” After Grace and Tabitha said hello, Del turned to his brother. Unspoken emotion glimmered in his eyes as he grinned at his sibling.

“Hey, asshole. How long has it been?” Del asked as he spread his arms.

“Too long. Four years? And four years more before that. Welcome home, man,” Clay muttered as they bear-hugged and pounded each other on the back. His broad grin and the way he clenched his brother at the shoulders made it clear that he was happy to have his brother home safe.

Lily smiled at the display of manly affection between them. Clay looked jubilant, though he controlled it well. Tabitha sniffed and pulled a tissue from her sleeve.

Grace nudged Lily. “I’m going to take off so you can enjoy the reunion. I’ll get you the particulars for the sleepover later.” Lily nodded and gladly received Grace’s hug before she left.

Del turned to Lily, while still holding on to Clay’s shoulder, and slid his hand around her waist. “Damn, it is so good to see you both.”

Clay asked, “You weather that storm okay last night?”

Del chuckled. “Yeah, for the most part. No electricity, but that’s not something I’m dependent on anymore. I’ve got a roof leak that needs fixing and a ranch falling down around my ears but it’s damned good to be back.”

“Clay told me that I get to have a long lunch with you,” Lily said, squeezing his solid forearm through his heavy all-weather jacket, which looked tough enough to weather any conditions Afghanistan could dish out.

Her words drew an abrupt, dirty look from Tabitha, but Lily chose to ignore it. Clay told her she could have the time with Del, and she planned to take it.

“That’s right. You’re all mine all afternoon. I’d like to get caught up with Clay for a few minutes first, if that’s okay.”

Lily couldn’t help the big smile on her face. “Sure.”

Del followed Clay to the workroom, casting one last, pleased glance back at her.

“So
that’s
Del,” Tabitha said as she busied herself organizing sales tickets.

Lily tried to tamp down her enthusiasm because she detected the miffed tone in Tabitha’s voice. She must’ve felt slighted by their instant threesome. It was no surprise to Lily that they would reform that bond as soon as they were together again.

“Yes. I’m glad he’s home safe.”

“Thank you for handling that
Warner
woman for me,” Tabitha’s words were clear and distinct. “I can’t stand the way she
prances
in here like she owns the place.”

Lily hid her bewildered expression behind the showcase as she squatted down and lined up the other online orders waiting for local pickup.

I wonder what Tabitha’s issues with Grace are really about.

Grace was always friendly and never demanded special attention or favors.

“What do you mean? What’d she do?” Maybe she’d get some straight answers for a change instead of more sour grapes.

Tabitha screwed up her lips and joggled her head back and forth indignantly. “She acts like the world owes her
love
and
flowers
and
kisses
. She’s always so
sweet
. When what she
is
, is a gold-digging
whore
.”

Whoa!

Lily hoped that Clay couldn’t hear any of what Tabitha was saying. It was obvious she’d been building up to this conversation for a while.

“Everyone thinks she’s so
sweet
, like she craps rainbows while riding a unicorn, when the truth is, she’s a master manipulator. I’ll never forget the day she
swooped
in and claimed not
one
, not
two
…” She held up three fingers melodramatically. “But
three
eligible Divine bachelors. She had
one
man proposing to her while another was buying her extremely expensive solid gold jewelry. Why, I told my friend Elizabeth Owen it was the most
disgusting
display of—of…whoredom I’d ever seen! And where does Elizabeth wind up when she tries to reveal to the world the disgusting immorality of what those perverts do
? In jail
!”

Behind the showcase, out of sight, Lily put her face in her hands
.
She heard a vehicle door being closed outside.

Whoredom? Really? Calgon, take me away.

“Then Grace tops it all off by getting that
precious
Ethan Grant shot, trying to protect her big, overweight—”

“Tabitha! Stop!” Lily finally blurted out as a customer pulled on the shop door, jingling the bell. Tabitha’s lips jammed shut on her vitriolic words.

In a saccharine-sweet tone, Tabitha greeted the couple. “Hellooo! How can I help you today?”

You could start by washing your mouth out with soap, woman.

Lily tidied the interior of the case to give Clay and Del time to talk privately, but she couldn’t wait to have lunch with him and get all caught up.

After the couple left without buying anything, Tabitha went about her work, muttering and grumbling to herself until Del and Clay emerged from the back.

“Ready for lunch, Lily Bell?” Over Del’s shoulder, she saw Tabitha scowl and mouth to herself, “Lily Bell,” and had to resist the urge to laugh.

“I sure am. I’ll just get my coat and purse.”