Don't Break My Heart (Straight from the Heart #3) (2 page)

Pauly scooted closer to me, wrapping his arm around me, drawing me closer to him. “It’s funny now, don’t lie.” Before he could say anything else, the opening scene started flashing before our eyes “Shhh, the movie’s starting, tommy girl. I don’t want to miss this part.”

That was how Pauly and I stayed up until nearly half way through the movie when the final school play scene came on. A shiver caused me to shake a little and Pauly squeezed my side where his fingers were playing with the bottom of my tank top. I forced myself to believe it was completely innocent.

“Come here,” Pauly gestured to me and pointed to the extra blanket on his side. “Looks like you could use it.”

I nodded, and as I reached over him to grab the blanket, his hands quickly grabbed my hips, causing me to straddle him.

“Pauly, we can’t…” I pleaded, hesitant to make the biggest mistake we could ever make, as much as it pains me to say that. Trust me, kissing and having sex with Pauly Donovan is something I have thought about often. I’ve wanted to show him just how much I love him, even if he doesn’t feel the same.

Sirens were going off in my head. I tried to open my mouth again, but Pauly repositioned his fingers so they were crawling up my spine, reaching the tip of my ponytail, and yanking my head back. “Pauly…” I said once more as I felt his hot breath on my skin. “We shouldn’t do this.”

I might as well have been talking to the ceiling because that’s all I could see from the angle he had me. He let go of my ponytail, and lift his face closer to mine again. We were eye level with each other. “I’ve wanted to do this for a very long time, tommy girl. You look too fucking delectable for me to pass up right now. My dick is completely hard under these shorts, and I can tell you are soaking wet and need some special attention…” Was this real right now? Was he trying to seduce me?

I raised my eyebrows in shock. All too eager to go along with his plan, I knew our relationship would ultimately disintegrate from there. Having sex with a band mate, even if I loved him, would make things awkward when it didn’t work out.

But a little of curiosity never hurt anyone.

I tuned out my inner thoughts and took the plunge. Our mouths met in the middle for a hard, passionate kiss. His lips were absolutely perfect, plump and completely kissable. I don’t even remember why I kept telling him we couldn’t as he deepened the kiss. I let a moan slip from my lips as I felt his hardness underneath me and I rubbed against it, wishing that it was inside me right then.

“So much for saying ‘we can’t’, huh?” Pauly mentioned after we broke our kiss, his hands gripping my sides tightly now.

I was done thinking we can’t at that point, shaking my head and reaching for the hem of Pauly’s shirt, I helped him get it off over his head. I tossed the shirt onto the floor and crushed my lips to his once more. Our tongues met somewhere in the middle as our kiss grew hungrier and more passionate. I let my hands run down his muscular shoulders, to his biceps, then to his abs. Just feeling his skin with my fingers drove me wild inside. Pauly withdrew his lips from mine as he started leaving a trail of kisses from my neck to my collarbone, my most sensitive spot.

“Holy shit,” I breathed, not paying attention to my swearing filter at least for right now. “Do that again.”

Pauly flipped me over so that he was on top of me. I felt so small compared to his large, muscular frame as his eyes were glued to mine. With both hands, he managed to pull off my shorts and underwear with one swift movement, the clothing getting lost somewhere in the sheets.
I think he’s done this before,
I thought to myself, and I suddenly felt bare to him. Well, almost bare, but using both hands, I slipped my shirt over my head, and then, I really was bared to him.

I had never felt so good.

“Damn,” was all that came out of his mouth as he licked his lips. He used his fingers to run them up and down my sides. “You need to be naked around me more often, Luce. You’re fucking perfect.” His eyes trailed from my face to my very visible D cup sized breasts on full display for his pleasure.

I crossed my arms over them, suddenly feeling insecure. “Now you’re making me feel all nervous,” I whispered, my face turning away from him. He used two fingers to tilt my face back toward him.

“Why are you nervous? You’ve known me forever.” Pauly made me feel at ease again. “I’m just telling you what any guy should tell you. You need someone that will make you feel good and put that sparkle that I miss so much back into your eyes.” Using one hand to keep himself hoisted, he used the other to unbutton and unzip them all the way down. “You’ve been so down ever since you and Cale broke up; I can see it in your eyes even when you pretend you’re okay. Let me help you feel happy again.”

I didn’t know what to say to that. Here was Pauly, on top of me, admitting that he wanted to fuck me. Technically, I was agreeing, because here we were taking each other’s clothes off when tonight was just supposed to be a movie and wine night… between friends! So much for that.

I took the liberty of pushing his unzipped pants down to his feet, realizing he wasn’t wearing any boxers after my hand briefly grazed his hard cock. Pauly looked at me as if he was surprised I’d made the next step. “What?” I grinned at him, feeling myself getting wetter by the minute just knowing he was so close to being inside me. “You wanted to help me feel happy again, that’s the way to do it.”

He grunted, reaching for one of my hands and guiding it towards his solid hardness.
How the hell will this fit within my hand, let alone inside me?
I gripped his cock tight, but not too tight, and started moving my hand up and down his length, not breaking our eye contact.

“Luce, holy fuck, you keep doing that and I’ll be finished in no time.” Pauly groaned, briefly kissing me on the neck, creeping his way to my perky breasts just waiting for him to touch. I quickened my movements, loving the way he felt in my hand. I felt him stiffen for a split second, before he ripped my hand away from him.

“Why did you do that?” I was almost out of breath just as I felt his teeth graze my nipple and his hand squeeze my free breast. I tipped my head back and let out an involuntary moan as he had me this close to having an orgasm before he was even inside me.

Pauly lifted his head up, hand still in place, and he said, “If I’m going to come, it’s going to be inside you where I belong.” Reaching for his pants at the foot of the bed, he grabbed a condom, and removed it from the foil. “Are you sure you want to do this, Luce? I don’t want you to feel awkward with me or feel like I’m pressuring you.” As sweet as he was being at the minute, we had gone this far already, so I snatched the condom form him and placed it over his cock myself. “Shit, next time you touch me like that, I’ll come right inside that pretty set of lips.”

I felt myself blush at the way he was talking to me, but I liked it. I was at the point where I craved his dirty talk; I wanted him to fuck me like this was the only time we’d ever be together. I was completely, one hundred percent ready with desire.

He repositioned himself so he was in between my legs. “I promise,” he whispered in my ear as he slowly slid his way into my wetness, inch by glorious inch. “This will be something you’ll never forget.”

The next couple of days flew by as we wrapped up our short two-week tour. I wouldn’t really even call it a tour. We played a few shows around the Midwest and drove back home again. Our record label wanted us to have a new record out by the end of summer. However, with the time off that we’d had so far this year, everyone has been so caught up in their own lives to think about song writing.

I was thankful to get home to the 2- bedroom apartment I’ve had ever since I moved out of my parents’ house when I graduated high school. I’ve never really cared about having a big huge mansion or anything like that because I had no one else to share it with. My siblings, Lucas and Lizzy, who were almost thirty, had families of their own and lived around the state of Michigan. The only time the three of us got together or saw each other was when I was off on a break during holiday season. Those were few and far between.

The first night back home, I immediately went to my Jacuzzi tub, took my clothes off, and just enjoyed the warm water crashing over me, relaxing my muscles. I have been on edge ever since the night I woke up in Pauly’s arms after we had sex. It was the most amazing night of my life; we spent almost the whole night taking out our aggression and passion on each other. I had no other words to describe what happened.

However, I realize now we shouldn’t have done it.

I lifted my head off the crook of Pauly’s arm and noticed he was wide-awake, staring at the ceiling, keeping his breathing quiet, and music on his phone low so he wouldn’t wake me.

“Hey,” I whispered, my lips on his neck, giving him a good morning kiss. “Please tell me I wasn’t the only one that got sleep.”

Pauly shifted, so he wrapped his arm around my waist, kissing me on the forehead. “Yeah, it’s a little hard when I heard girls screaming in the hall way not that long ago.” We both shook our heads and laughed, knowing very well what happened outside of those doors last night.

“Damon probably grew tired of the company and kicked them out once they did their job,” I retorted, and Pauly ran his hand up and down my back as I laid a hand on his chest.

“Not surprising.” I felt him take a deep breath before he  said, “I had fun last night.”

Oh, shit. Here comes the bad news. It always started with “I had fun last night…”

“But?” I egged him on. “Was I bad or something?”

Pauly immediately shook his head, unwrapping his arm from around me so that he could sit up against the headboard. “No, Lucy, it wasn’t that at all. You blew my goddamn mind and I don’t regret any second of it.”

“I’m still waiting for the ‘but.’ You can just spit it out; it will make things go a lot smoother…”

“Why do you expect me to say something bad?”

“Because you’re forgetting that I know you all too well, Paul.” I used his name this time, which meant I was deadly serious. I scooted up against the headboard and kicked my legs out of the covers, attempting to get out of the bed. “Just tell me the truth.”

There went another loud sigh. I couldn’t even face him; I had such a bad feeling in my gut that he was going to reject me after everything we had done last night.

“I think we should keep this as a one-time thing,” Pauly finally spat it out. “But, listen Lucy, please.” He reached for me across the bed, stopping me from getting off the bed.

I pulled myself out of his grasp, planting my feet on the ground, and standing up. “Why should I listen to you? What was this to you? Was I like some fucking groupie slut to you last night?” I tried so hard not to cry in front of Pauly because he would feel bad for saying this to me. Nevertheless, he’d said it, and that was that. There was no going back and pretending he actually cared about my feelings.

That was out of the question.

I quickly walked to the foot of the bed where my clothes were lying in a heap. I snatched them up and started putting them back on again.

“Lucy, that’s not it at all.” Pauly sounded frustrated. “We have to see each other every day and you’re my best friend. I don’t want to ruin our friendship…”

“And create tension in the band?” I retorted. “I should’ve fucking known, Pauly. I’m going to go. One of the others should be up by now.” I snatched up my luggage and made a dash for the door before Pauly could make it over to me. He was standing fully naked in front of me, trying to find clothes to put on so he could chase me and explain some more.

“I know you feel the same way, Lucy. Come on now… I’m not saying you were terrible because you weren’t. Please don’t think that. You were the best person I’ve ever been with…”

I wasn’t ready to hear this. I flipped him the bird without looking back and slammed the room door shut.

I hate to admit it, but he was right. We couldn’t have sex with each other or even date for that matter because if we were to end it, it would only create problems down the road. In addition, if things didn’t work out, how would that be for the band? He was better off being single Pauly while I was just… Lucy. I didn’t want to be single forever, but I’ll suck it up for now because this band is my family and I’ll do anything for each and every one of those guys.

After soaking in the Jacuzzi for almost a half hour, I heard a knock at the door.

“Just a second!” I shouted. “I’ll be right there.” I ran out of the bathroom and into my bedroom where I had a pair of shorts and a T-shirt I had just bought before our mini tour. I threw the shirt over my head and the shorts over my legs, rushing toward the door. I peeked through the hole in the door to see Damon standing there with his hands in his pockets.

“What were you doing in there Luce, touching yourself or something?” Damon chuckled as he gave me a bear hug, kicking the door shut behind him.

“You wish Charming. I was soaking in the Jacuzzi. It looked awfully lonely after being away for the tour.” I grinned. “You should be at your place. What are you doing here?” I always liked to tease Damon because he was the one that had a decent sized house on the outskirts of the city. Pauly, Alex and Mike had their own houses too, but Damon being… well Damon, had to go all out and show all of us up; hell, his was practically a mansion.

“I felt like coming to see my sis instead.” Damon, ran a hand through his blond hair. He had buzzed it off back in winter and was slowly letting it grow back, complaining that he felt like an old, bald man with buzzed hair. “Plus, I had an idea.”

I cocked my head to the side. “Idea, huh? This better be good…” We sat down on my black and gray pinstriped couch, flipping the TV on to one of the music stations.

I tried changing it to the next channel, but Damon stopped me mid-song. “Keep this on, Luce, I love this song!” I chuckled and set the remote down, leaning back into the pillow behind me. I loved how soft this couch felt on my skin, I could sleep on this thing if I wanted to, but I preferred my bed any day.

“If you say so, boss. So what was your brilliant idea?” 

“What would you say to a couple weeks up at The Manor?” Damon suggested, mentioning the cabin we visited when we had the chance. “I mean since it’s getting close to the fourth of July and everything, we could throw a huge bash up there on the lake, invite some friends, it’ll be pretty kick ass.”

“But what about putting out our album by the end of summer.” I interjected. “We only have a couple of songs written, and the label wanted us to have everything done by now.” We’ve been receiving phone calls almost daily from our representative at the label, asking us how the recording process was coming. Quite frankly it was a pain in the ass knowing they were on us like wildfire. We all agreed we were going to take a decent sized break, especially after what happened in Pontiac last November when Brayden Schaefler, Bryn’s brother, injured her, Cale and their Everlasting band mate Tyler, ultimately killing himself.

“We can write up there like we usually do,” Damon replied casually, stretching his arms over his head. “Plus we got the studio in the downstairs, we don’t need those fancy ass producers this time around.”

I chuckled. That was easier said than done. However, I really liked the idea of spending some time up at the official “Ignite the Flames” cabin we purchased in Alpena a few years ago with our first royalty check. It was right along the lake and was absolutely enormous, but that way the five of us each had our space when we needed it.

“Sounds like a plan to me.” I rested my feet on the coffee table in front of us as we bopped along to the song that was now playing on TV. “Have you mentioned this to Pauly, Alex or Mike yet?”

“Hell, no. You’re my go to girl, Lucy. I always like to go to you first for stuff like this.” He ruffled up the back of my hair and I glared at him while he shot me a broken smile. “Are you okay, Luce? I know we just got back but even the past couple of days you’ve been really tense and haven’t said much.”

As much as Damon Charming loved his women and acted cocky and arrogant when he was around them, he was a softy and a big teddy bear when it was just him and I hanging out, playing music. Neither of us have had any feelings toward each other which makes things a lot more relaxed between us.

“Thanks, Charming, I knew I liked you for a reason.” I cracked a smile, leaning into him.

“That still doesn’t explain what’s wrong with you. Did something happen between you and Paul?” I always thought it was weird to hear anyone say Pauly’s name, not his nickname. Just hearing it gave me a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. My mouth tensed up, and I started to bite the inside of my mouth when Damon finally caught on. “Holy shit, I was right that night! You two totally fucked like bunny rabbits, am I right?”

I nodded slightly, trying to block the memory of that night out of my mind. “You got it Sherlock.”

Damon slapped his knee. “Shit. I should’ve known from the way you’ve been completely silent around him.”

“And I’d like to not talk about it, D, please.” I pleaded with him. “That morning ended very badly and I don’t want to relive it right now.”

“Do you need me to kick his ass? Best friend or not, I will Lucy. I know you love the guy, actually Alex, Mike and I do. It’s obvious he cares about you, too. I don’t know how he screwed that up between the two of you, but he’s an ass for doing so.” I tipped my head back and laughed. This was exactly what I needed… quality talk time with Damon. He usually makes me feel better about everything.

“It’s fine, Damon, that trip up north and spending my days writing might do some good. Are your brother and his band coming up, too or are they busy?”

Damon shrugged. “I don’t know yet. You should drive up with Emily; she’s been blowing up my cell about seeing you.” Referring to his close cousin Emily Charming, she and I shared the same birthdate and went to school together until the band started touring in late High School and we’ve kept in touch and hung out whenever I was back home. She was one of the only true friends I kept in touch with except Bryn.

“Yeah, I think I might call her. It’d be fun to catch up with her.”

“I guess I better get going. I still have a shit ton of laundry to do and I’ll get ahold of the guys and give it a couple of days and we can plan on going up north.” We both stood up and Damon drew me into another hug. “Let that shit go with him, Luce. You’re way too good for Pauly and he doesn’t realize he lost a damn good woman.”

“Well, he never really had me,” I said truthfully. “But he hasn’t lost me as a friend.” That’s the way it had to be.

“That’s the spirit, tommy girl,” Damon chuckled, opening the door. “I’ll text you sometime later ok?”

“Sounds good. And thanks for stopping by, Damon.” I waved to him as he shut the apartment door behind him.

***

Damon called me back bright and early the next morning to tell me we were leaving the next day. So I called his cousin Emily for a girl’s day with me before we were supposed to leave. She was so excited when I asked her if she wanted to drive up north, too.

“You need to spill some dirty secrets about those gorgeous men you tour with every day. Well, except for Damon since he’s my cousin.” She said to me as we sat on the middle of my bed painting our toenails before I finished packing.

“Have at them, Em. They’re like family to me. Although you’d be good with Alex.”

“Alex Dawson? Girl, you definitely know my taste in men!” And we both started giggling uncontrollably. Emily and Alex briefly dated when we were all freshmen.. I think Emily still had a little bit of a crush on Alex, and I didn’t blame her. He was the nerd of the group, always building a computer for someone or fixing my laptop whenever I couldn’t get it to work. In addition, he’s easy on the eyes.

“Now, don’t base your decision going with me just because of him…” I scolded her, and she threw the closed bottle of nail polish at my arm.

“No way. I’m there for you chickadee. And this little road trip is going to be ah-mazing!” She shrieked, and I couldn’t help but laugh. After ordering pizza around midnight, and slamming it back in less than 15 minutes, we finally decided to get some sleep.

Pauly: Wake your asses up.

I woke up to the next morning that text. I rolled over in my bed and was tempted to throw my phone against the wall. I felt tired and didn’t really like being awakened like that, but that was Pauly for ya. I ran a hand through my snarly bed hair as I looked at the message again, thinking of my comeback.