Doubt (11 page)

Joanna
’s stomach started turning. The sushi was playing havoc with her intestines.

“
Do you really need me to answer that question?”
Jenna said, looking into the distance, as if analyzing the situation and considering all her options.

Joanna sat back, trying to think as well. But her thoughts were wandering away.
She knew she just betrayed the Truth Seekers. More importantly, she understood now she had just started something
.
Exactly what, she didn’t know.

CRISTAL SAW A COUPLE OF tourists at the hotel counter arguing with the concierge. She scanned the lobby and noticed two boys who looked like they were local, hanging around the American girls who were apparently staying at the hotel. A stout man dressed in a black suit with sunglasses was seated in a chair near the front door of the lobby. He was watching her carefully.
That must be the security agent who asked to see me.

She took her tim
e walking over to the counter, grateful that the concierge was busy with the tourists. It would give Harry enough time to get there and assist with the interrogation.

She had texted him
immediately after receiving the phone call, “Urgent. Get here ASAP. Agent in lobby wants to question me.”

His response was,
“Stall until I get there.”

From the corner of her eye, she could see that the agent had stood up.
He was walking towards her.

“
Ms. Hernandez,” a woman’s voice called from behind her.

Cr
istal turned, expecting to see someone from the hotel staff.

“
Yes?”

St
anding in front of her was the full-bodied woman who had sat beside her on the airplane.
What was she doing here?

The woman was holding up
her identification, which read, “Yaffa Bauer, National Security Agent.” The photo on the ID displayed an expressionless version of the woman.

“
My name Yaffa,” she said, putting her ID into her pocket. “You remember me?”

Cristal
couldn’t figure out what this lady was doing here.

“
Sorry, but what do you want from me?”

Yaffa
Bauer motioned for her to follow her to a room off the side of the hotel counter.

“
We talk in private,” Yaffa replied loudly with a strong Hebrew accent.

Cristal glanced over to the
hotel entrance, relieved to see Harry walking inside. She noticed that since he had come to Tel Aviv that his looks had changed somewhat. Perhaps it was the Middle Eastern sun that painted his hair with gold highlights and warmed his skin color from a pale white to a copper bronze. Was it the same sun that made his blue eyes appear bluer and deeper than the ocean?

“
Ms. Hernandez,” Yaffa prompted, as if impatient with the delay.

“
Just a minute. My boss is here. Can he join us?” Cristal asked.

Yaffa turned to
look at Harry who now stood beside them. Cristal noticed that Harry was much taller than the agent. Yaffa had to stretch her neck to look up at him. Quickly, as if on cue, Yaffa put her pudgy arms on her wide hips and glared at Harry.

“
Shalom,” Harry said, stretching his hand out to shake her hand.

The ag
ent gave Harry a quick nod in acknowledgment of his greeting. She eyed him suspiciously and then shifted her attention to Cristal.

“
Better we speak alone,” she said in a firm voice.

Cristal crossed her arms
over her chest.

“
Have I done anything wrong?”

Yaffa
’s nostrils flared slightly before she responded, glancing briefly at Harry.

“
No, I have questions.”

Harry said,
“Do you have a warrant?”

He stepped closer to
Yaffa.

“
No, no warrant,” she sneered. “This is Israel, not episode of
Law & Order
.”

H
arry chuckled. He responded to her switching from English to Hebrew. His voice had softened as he reached into his back pocket to take out his wallet. He showed her his Israeli ID. Yaffa took a look and nodded her head, her body relaxing as she listened. They spoke with each other in Hebrew for a few minutes, while Cristal stood and watched.

Yaffa
began to smile as she faced Cristal, and said in broken English, “Okay, we speak like friends then. Just tell me the truth.”

She motioned to the people sitting
in the lobby chairs to get up, at the same time that she flashed her ID at them. The man and woman looked at each other, obviously frightened that an agent was in their presence. They quickly gathered their things, got up, and left.

“
Sit,” she said as she sank down onto the couch.

She flashed a dirty look at another couple
who were about to sit beside her. When they ignored her, she waved her ID at them. They apologized in hushed voices and walked away.

Cristal
glanced at Harry, unsure of what to do next. Harry gave her a small and comforting smile.

Yaffa opened her
handbag and rummaged about until she pulled out her smartphone. She swiped the screen and tapped icons before turning the phone towards them.

On the screen was
a photo of the inside of an airplane. The people visible in the photo were screaming, as if fearing for their lives. Cristal felt Harry’s hand cover hers. Her stomach was twisting into knots.

Yaffa swiped the screen to display another photo.
In this one, Kerim was reclined in his seat, and Cristal’s head was resting on his shoulder. Cristal bit her bottom lip, wondering what Harry was thinking.

“
Look closer,” Yaffa said as she pinched the screen, zooming into a close-up of Kerim’s head.

As the photo sharpened,
Cristal saw something odd. Surrounding Kerim’s head was a soft white glow, almost like an aura. Were her eyes playing tricks on her?

“
Who is this man?” Yaffa asked.

Cristal cleared her throat before answering
, and replied, “That’s Kerim Ilgaz.”

“
How you know him?” Yaffa inquired.

Cristal
paused. Her insides were shaking. Part of her was afraid to lose control and cause another
event
.

She managed to say,
“Kerim is a subcontractor that Harry hired. Maybe you should ask Harry.”

“
Ah, yes, Harry told me. Excuse, my English is not so good. I want to know who is Kerim to you? Lover?”

“
What?” Cristal asked, trying her best not to sound defensive.

Yaffa pursed her
lips, and her nostrils flared even more than before, as she said, “We were on same flight. Two of us agents are always on flights from New York to Tel Aviv. After the plane stop shaking, I check to see that passengers are safe. When I come back, I saw you with this man. I took the picture. Submitted it with report.”

Cristal
crossed her arms.
She is driving me nuts.

“
I still don’t know what the issue is.”

“You see the halo around him?” Yaffa said gruffly.

Harry took the phone from her hand and examined the picture more carefully.

“Very good Photoshop job, Yaffa,” he said with a grin.

“
Hmph!” Yaffa snorted and grabbed the phone back.

“
This is photo I took. No Photoshop.”

She swiped the screen quickly and more photos of Kerim and Cristal flashed before them.
The same weird light was around Kerim’s head in each photo. The last one was a video. Yaffa tapped the “Play” button.

In the video, the glow
surrounding Kerim’s head was more obvious. Harry’s gaze met Cristal’s briefly. Yaffa snorted, pleased that she had finally gotten the attention of both Cristal and Harry.

“
So, you want to answer my questions now?” she asked, facing Cristal.

Her other hand waved
for Harry to keep his mouth shut.

“
Kerim is a friend, a good friend. It was my first time flying on an international flight. He was helping me relax and keep calm.”
It was true.

Yaffa scribbl
ed notes in her notepad, while mumbling to herself, “Hmph…friend.”

Cristal
looked at Yaffa sideways and asked, “Why do you say
friend
that way? It’s like you don’t believe me!”

Yaffa
’s pea green eyes met hers. Her smile widened, which pushed her chipmunk cheeks aside.

“
When Ilgaz asked me to give my seat to him, he tell me you are his half-sister and you are afraid to fly in airplanes.”

Cristal
choked back her laughter.

“
I’m not laughing at your English, Yaffa, really. I’m not good at languages. But I think Kerim pulled a fast one on you. Maybe he thought you would give up your seat if you thought we were brother and sister.”

Yaffa
’s eyebrows raised as she spoke.

“
Ah…is that so?”

She scribbled again in her notepad.
Putting down her pen, she raised her head and focused her eyes on Cristal.

“
Okay, I want to know more about Kerim. Who he is, his past, who his friends are, and why he is in Israel. From our investigation, we do not have much information on Kerim Ilgaz before 2009. No family, no friends, no lovers, no work history,
shvm dbr
–nothing.”

Harry said,
“I told you everything about Kerim. He is here as a subcontractor for Global Nation. He provides security for Cristal, myself, and the staff at the GN office in Haifa. You can check this with our head office. Cristal does not know much about him because I was the one who hired him.”

Yaffa sighed, giving
him a polite smile before standing up.

“
Yes, yes, you tell me this. It is time now for me to go. Take my information. You remember more, contact me. Like I tell Harry in Hebrew, Kerim Ilgaz is considered threat to national security. Here, we say someone is guilty until he proves he is innocent.”

She
gave them a grunt and then motioned to the other agents who were scattered around the lobby that it was time to leave. Harry gave Yaffa a smile, tapping Cristal on the foot to signal for her to do the same. Cristal gave her a forced smile. Yaffa returned the fake smile, turned around and walked towards the hotel entrance, the agents tailing behind her. She glanced over her shoulder briefly before leaving the hotel.

“
Shalom,” she said before walking out the door.

HARRY PACED BACK AND FORTH in front of her. He glanced at his watch while mumbling under his breath.

“
Sit down,” Cristal demanded, pointing to the chair beside her. “You’re making me nervous.”

“
I’m trying to figure out what to do next,” he said quietly.

“
Kerim is going to be here soon,” Cristal stated in a matter-of-fact way. “Are you going to tell him what happened?”

Harry
whirled around and pointed a finger at her.

“
Don’t say a word! You got that, Cristal? Until we find out more about him, consider him a hostile.”

Cristal couldn
’t believe her ears. She leapt out of her chair, and stood facing him eye-to-eye, as if daring him to challenge her.

“
Hostile? This isn’t a game, Harry. You said you checked him out before inviting him to the Truth Seekers. Just because some crazy agent shows us some weird photos, now you think that Kerim is a hostile?”

Her voice echoed in the lobby.

She
followed Harry’s gaze to see where he was looking. She noted that he was peering at the main entrance of the hotel. She sucked in her breath and gasped when she saw Kerim standing between the opened glass doors. His olive-colored skin contrasted his white unbuttoned long sleeve shirt and black jeans. But what made her hold her breath was the bright blinding light that blazed around him like angry flames.

He
moved away from the door, and the light behind him flooded into the lobby. She realized that the setting sun had played optical tricks on her. Or so she thought.

He stood motionless.

“Kerim,” she called out, walking over to him.

He
looked past her, as if not seeing her. His grey eyes were fixed on Harry.

“
What’s this about?” he asked.

Harry
moved in closer, but he didn’t volunteer a response. Cristal sighed, knowing that she would have to be the first person to speak.

“
An agent was here asking questions about you,” Cristal said.

The heat from
Harry’s glare could have disintegrated steel.

“
Agent?” Kerim asked.

“
Let’s go somewhere else to talk,” Harry demanded, glancing at the group of hotel guests that were entering the lobby.

“
Sorry,” Kerim announced, “but I’m not going anywhere with anyone who thinks I’m the enemy.”

His jawline was tense,
his voice quiet. He gave Cristal a look.

She reached out for
his arm. He pulled it away from her, turned and walked back towards the hotel entrance. The doors opened and he marched outside onto the street towards his motorbike.

“
Kerim, please,” she called out in a loud voice, while running after him.

“
Cristal, let him go,” she heard Harry say as he followed behind her.

“
Leave me alone, Harry,” she snapped.

Kerim was
already on his bike with the engine roaring.

“
Wait for me, please!”
You can’t leave me here
.

Kerim turned around and looked at her.
His eyes met hers.

Please, don
’t leave me here.

He
paused for a moment and then tilted his head for her to climb on. Without hesitation, she grabbed his shoulder and jumped onto the back of the bike. This bike wasn’t as flashy as the Ducati—a matte black color, shorter in length and not as shiny.

Kerim
looked hot on any motorcycle as far as Cristal was concerned.

Kerim revved the engine and
glanced over his left shoulder to check the traffic.

Cristal
saw Harry standing on the sidewalk, his shiny blue eyes stabbing her a hundred times with his piercing stare. He shook his head as Kerim pulled out into the street.

***

Although there was a breeze, the evening air was heavy and her sweat clung to her like a heavy coat. Kerim weaved in and out of the chaotic traffic like a seasoned local. Plumes of black smoke from the tailpipes of cars and trucks as they rode past filled her lungs. She could taste the diesel fuel in her throat. When he turned off onto a side street, she marveled at how many homes could be squeezed onto one street.

She watched
rows and rows of short, three-story buildings pass by them; they all seemed to have the same crumbling alabaster, sand-colored stucco with splashes of spray-painted graffiti angrily emblazoned here and there.

A
ir-conditioning units stuck out from windows and grey satellite dishes pointed their noses in a south-easterly direction. But regardless of the passing terrain, Kerim adeptly swerved around the narrow streets with motorbikes, scooters, and cars half-parked on the sidewalks and on the road.

Teenagers and twenty-something adults
hung out around shops and small grocery stores, apparently unmoved by the warm temperatures of the season. She saw soldiers walking by and thought of how safe she should be feeling. But what she couldn’t see were all the seniors and families who were tucked into their private residences. Presumably those people were probably trying to cool off with what little relief their window air-conditioners could provide.

As Kerim
leaned into a corner, wafts of hashish hit her sense of smell. A loud group of young men were horsing around in an alley lane. From a boom box, a rap-style song played
Shalom
Shady
, loudly. It was a wildly popular rap star whose Hebrew/English rap songs played day and night on the TV music video channel and on the radio stations. The boys jumped around, dancing and mimicking the rapper’s moves.

Kerim
decelerated and turned into a driveway in front of metal grey gates. He stopped the bike for a moment, letting the engine idle.

Cristal hear
d the sounds of people scrambling and voices calling out, “Kerim is back.”

The
gates creaked open. Kerim rode inside the cemented lot. Gabriel greeted him and when he saw Cristal, he grinned from ear to ear.

“
Hey, Cristal! Glad you finally decided to visit the bachelor pad.”

He helped her off the bike
, and immediately rambled on about what he and Rinaldo had done earlier in the day.

She watched Kerim disappear into the
house. He didn’t even bother to wait for her.

“
Rinaldo and Raffe are inside. Come in. We just picked up pizza. I’m sure you’re starving.”

“
Yeah, I’m definitely hungry, come to think of it,” she managed to say.

She followed Gabriel inside a narrow hallway
and up the stairs. Her eyes adjusted to the dim lighting, as she entered what she guessed was the living room.

The place was cluttered with shoes piled up on the side of the doorway
. Tons of family photos adorned the walls, and she laughed when she saw all the books and papers piled up on the coffee table. The only modern treasure in the room was a 52-inch flat screen TV that hung on the wall next to the fireplace.

“
Come into the kitchen. That’s where everyone is,” Gabriel teased while gesturing with his hand for her to follow him.

They walked
into the kitchen through another dark hallway that easily was double the size of her hotel room. Rinaldo sat in one corner of the room and he was chatting with a girl while he smoked a water pipe, which was popularly known in the Middle East as
sheesha.
Kerim was deep in conversation with someone and his back was turned to her. She thought it was strange that no one even noticed her when she entered the room.

“
Come, the pizza is on the counter. Help yourself. Don’t be shy,” Gabriel said, waving to the open pizza boxes.

She
walked over, her mouth ready to bite into a juicy slice. Her eyes widened when she saw that the pizza was covered with yellow corn niblets.

“
Corn?” she asked.

“
It’s an Israeli specialty,” Kerim announced.

She turned
and saw Kerim standing behind her. He was half-smiling, not as pissed-off-looking as he was earlier, much to her relief.

“
I guess it would be impolite to refuse to eat it?” she asked, smiling.

Kerim looked over his shoulder
, and said, “This is Raffe.”

Raffe
was short, coming only up to Kerim’s shoulder. His skin was honey-brown colored and his hair was a pile of black curls crowning the top of his head. He was muscular, dressed in a black T-shirt and ripped blue jeans. He stared at her with eyes so black, they looked like they were filled with liquid ink.

“
Ma nishma
,” he said in a deep guttural voice, putting his fist up.

Cristal remembered that this meant
what’s up
but she forgot how to respond.

She
looked over at Kerim who motioned with his hand for her to raise her fist up.
Oh, yes,
she thought. Kerim had taught her how to greet people with a fist pump.

Raffe
smirked as he touched his fist with hers. She felt an electrical shock run through her body. Suddenly, a feeling surged through her that she didn’t understand, and everything inside her began to put her on alert.

Raffe
shot Kerim a look, grabbed a bottle of beer from the counter and bumped against Cristal slightly as he walked past her out of the room. She thought she heard him say something, but she wasn’t sure.

“
Don’t worry. He’s harmless,” Kerim said as he put his arm around her.

“
He creeps me out,” she said. “Who is he?”

Kerim gave her a kiss on her forehead
.

I
s that his way of shutting me up?

Rinaldo
approached both of them and asked, “So, Kerim, were you serious when you said that we’re all going to the wall tonight?”

He had an anxious look on his
face.

Kerim smirked, lifting his chin,
which was his way of saying
yes
.

“
Without Harry’s approval?” Rinaldo asked.

“
We don’t need his permission,” Kerim said.

Cristal sensed
that he was trying to control his temper.

Gabriel joined the circle
and voiced his concern, by saying, “It doesn’t feel right, Kerim. I mean, Harry is our leader, and he told us that we couldn’t go there without him giving us the green light.”

Cristal
’s head began to spin.
What wall? Why did Kerim want to go there? And what was so special about that place?

“
You don’t have to come. None of you have to come. But if you want to know the truth, you don’t need to wait for Harry to tell us when.”

Kerim put his arm around Cristal
’s shoulder, and he told her, “Come on. Let’s go!”

She swallowed hard
, acknowledging in her brain what she had to do. Her heart started beating faster. Taking deep breaths, she tried to control her heart rate. She told herself, “
Calm down.”

“
I’m coming with you,” Gabriel said. “I always wanted to find out what the big deal was about that place.”

Rinaldo
’s body language was not in agreement with Gabriel.

Rinaldo said,
“No way, guys. I ‘a’ stay here and wait for Harry’s call. He has his reasons for saying not to ‘a’ go without him. I have a big trust for him.”

He turned around and went back to the corner where he
had left the girl pouting.

“
Let’s go,” Kerim said.

Cristal
wanted to say something, but she decided it wasn’t the right time. Sometimes keeping quiet is better than asking too many questions.

***

They rode for over an hour on the motorcycle with Cristal’s arms tightly wrapped around Kerim’s waist. Gabriel had caught a ride with Kerim’s friends in their mini-bus. Cristal had hoped that they would have ridden with them, but she realized that Kerim liked to do things his way.

She closed her eyes for most of the trip, feeling drained of all her energy
. Only once did she glance up to see a highway route sign that said 60. 
How far is this wall?

“
Don’t fall asleep. Don’t want you to fall off,” Kerim called back to her.

She mumbled,
“I feel awful.”