Drunk With Blood (8 page)
Numbers 15.35-36
Number killed: 1
A Sabbath breaker
This one is pretty simple.
A man is caught gathering sticks on the Sabbath day.
While the children of Israel were in the wilderness, they found a man that gathered sticks upon the Sabbath day. Numbers 15.32
The people ask Moses what to do about it.
They … brought him unto Moses and Aaron … because it was not declared what should be done to him. 15.33-34
God tells Moses that everyone must stone the Sabbath breaker to death.
The LORD said unto Moses, The man shall be surely put to death: all the congregation shall stone him with stones. 15.35
So that’s what they do.
All the congregation brought him without the camp, and stoned him with stones, and he died; as the LORD commanded Moses. 15.36
Immediately after the stoning, God gets down to some more important business—like instructing the people on how to make fringes on their garments.
The LORD spake unto Moses, saying, Speak unto the children of Israel, and bid them that they make them fringes in the borders of their garments throughout their generations, and that they put upon the fringe of the borders a ribband of blue. 15.37-38
You see, God wants us to put fringes on our garments so that when we see the purple fringes we’ll say to ourselves, “Oh yeah, I’m supposed to follow all of God’s laws.”
It shall be unto you for a fringe, that ye may look upon it, and remember all the commandments of the LORD, and do them. 15.39a
That way, when we see someone working on the Sabbath, we’ll remember to stone him or her to death, on the spot, instead of following our own heart.
That ye seek not after your own heart and your own eyes. 15.39b
People who follow their hearts seldom stone people to death.
Numbers 16.31-33
Estimated Number Killed: At least 9
Korah, Dathan, Abiram and their families
Our story begins with Korah and his companions confronting Moses. Here’s what they say to him:
Ye take too much upon you, seeing all the congregation are holy, every one of them, and the LORD is among them: wherefore then lift ye up yourselves above the congregation of the LORD? Numbers 16.3
So what do you suppose Moses did when he heard this? Well, he fell on his face, of course. (People are always falling on their faces in the Bible.)
When Moses heard it, he fell upon his face. 16.4
And (while still on his face) offers this ingenious plan:
This do; Take you censers, Korah, and all his company; And put fire therein, and put incense in them before the LORD to morrow: and it shall be that the man whom the LORD doth choose, he shall be holy. 16.6-7
So they’re going to have an old-fashioned, incense-swinging, prayer contest, where God picks the winner. How cool is that?
They took every man his censer, and put fire in them, and laid incense thereon, and stood in the door of the tabernacle of the congregation with Moses and Aaron. 16.18
But before they start swinging their censers, God in all his glory shows up.
The glory of the LORD appeared unto all the congregation. 16.19
So God, Moses, and Aaron call a time out to talk things over.
Remember how, just a couple killings ago (
18
), God threatened to kill everyone for complaining? Yeah, well, he’s back at it again. He tells Moses and Aaron to stand back and get the hell out of the way because he’s going to kill everybody.
The LORD spake unto Moses and unto Aaron, saying, Separate yourselves from among this congregation, that I may consume them in a moment. 16.20-21
So what do you figure Moses and Aaron do when they hear that? Well, they fell on their faces, of course.
They fell upon their faces. 16.22a
And (while still on their faces) they try to talk God out of it (again).
And said, O God, the God of the spirits of all flesh, shall one man sin, and wilt thou be wroth with all the congregation? 16.22b
It seemed to work again, too, since God came up with a whole new game plan.
The LORD spake unto Moses, saying, Speak unto the congregation, saying, Get you up from about the tabernacle of Korah, Dathan, and Abiram. 16.23-24
So they gat up from the tabernacle of Korah, Dathan, and Abiram, on every side: and Dathan and Abiram came out, and stood in the door of their tents, and their wives, and their sons, and their little children. And Moses said, Hereby ye shall know that the LORD hath sent me. 16.27-28
If these men die the common death of all men, or if they be visited after the visitation of all men; then the LORD hath not sent me. But if the LORD make a new thing, and the earth open her mouth, and swallow them up, with all that appertain unto them, and they go down quick into the pit; then ye shall understand that these men have provoked the LORD. 16:29-30
So God and Moses arrange this test. If Korah and his companions die a normal, natural death, then God didn’t send Moses. But if they (and their families) are buried alive, then Moses is God’s special friend.
The test proved to everyone that God is on Moses’ side (since the other guys were buried alive).
The earth opened her mouth, and swallowed them up.... They, and all that appertained to them, went down alive into the pit, and the earth closed upon them: and they perished from among the congregation. 16.32-33
And that they should get the hell away from him before he buries them alive, too.
And all Israel that were round about them fled at the cry of them: for they said, Lest the earth swallow us up also. 16.34
But how many died in this killing?
Well, there’s no way to know for sure, but there were at least three men that opposed Moses (Korah, Dathan, and Abiram), and the story makes it clear that their wives and children were buried alive with them. So if each had at least one wife and one child, that would make at least 9 victims.
Numbers 16.35
Number Killed: 250
Incense burners
In his last killing (
20
), God showed whose side he’s on by opening up the ground and burying alive the leaders that opposed Moses (along with their families). And it made quite an impression on everyone.
All Israel that were round about them fled at the cry of them: for they said, Lest the earth swallow us up also. Numbers 16.34
But they were safe, at least for the moment, because God had his mind on other things.
Remember Moses’ original plan for dealing with Korah’s rebellion? He told him and his associates to burn incense before the Lord and let God choose who is holy.
This do; Take you censers, Korah, and all his company; And put fire therein, and put incense in them before the LORD to morrow: and it shall be that the man whom the LORD doth choose, he shall be holy. 16.6-7
But then God came up with the burying alive thing and the censer-swinging prayer contest was put on hold.
In the meantime, 250 of Korah’s followers did as Moses asked and burned some incense. So God burned them all alive to teach them a lesson or something. (If you do what he says he’ll burn you to death?)
There came out a fire from the LORD, and consumed the two hundred and fifty men that offered incense. 16.35
At least I don’t have to guess the number of victims this time.
Numbers 16.49
Number Killed: 14,700
Israelites
In case you haven’t been following along, here’s what has happened so far in Numbers 16.
- Korah and his companions question Moses’ leadership, saying “Ye take too much upon you, seeing all the congregation are holy, every one of them, and the LORD is among them: wherefore then lift ye up yourselves above the congregation of the LORD?” (Numbers 16.1-3)
- Moses falls on his face. (16.4)
- The glory of the Lord appears to the congregation. (16.19)
- God tells Moses to get out of the way because he’s going to kill everyone. (16.20-21)
- Moses and Aaron fall on their faces. (16.22)
- Korah, his companions, and their families are buried alive. (16.27-33)
- God burns to death 250 men for burning incense. (16.35)
So, as you might expect, the people who had witnessed all this were pretty freaked out by now.
But on the morrow all the congregation of the children of Israel murmured against Moses and against Aaron, saying, Ye have killed the people of the LORD. Numbers 16.41
Then “the glory of the Lord” appeared (again).
Behold ... the glory of the LORD appeared. 16.42
And God tells Moses he’s going to kill everyone (again).
And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying, Get you up from among this congregation, that I may consume them as in a moment. 16.44-45a
I think you can guess by now what Moses and Aaron did next.
They fell upon their faces. 16.45b
Then Moses told Aaron to burn some incense to try to stop God from killing everyone.
Moses said unto Aaron, Take a censer, and put fire therein from off the altar, and put on incense, and go quickly unto the congregation, and make an atonement for them: for there is wrath gone out from the LORD; the plague is begun. 16.46
And the incense burning worked. (Sometimes God will stop killing if you burn incense; sometimes he’ll burn you to death instead. He works in mysterious ways.) But not before 14,700 had died in the plague.
Now they that died in the plague were fourteen thousand and seven hundred, beside them that died about the matter of Korah. 16.49
So in this chapter (Numbers 16), God threatened to kill everyone twice, but settled for killing 14,959 in three separate killing events (nine or so buried alive, 250 burned to death, and 14,700 killed in a plague).
But don’t complain about it or he’ll kill you, too.
Numbers 21.3
Estimated Number Killed: 3,000
Canaanites
Don’t you just hate God-assisted holy war massacres? I do. They’re so damned boring.
But we might as well get used to them because God likes them. A lot. There are about 50 holy war massacres on the list of God’s 135 killings in the Bible. So there’s just no way to avoid them.
Here’s what happened in this one.
King Arad heard that the Israelites were coming, so he fought against them when they tried to invade his land.
When king Arad the Canaanite, which dwelt in the south, heard tell that Israel came by the way of the spies; then he fought against Israel, and took some of them prisoners. Numbers 21.1
So the Israelites asked God for help, promising to kill everyone in several cities.
Israel vowed a vow unto the LORD, and said, If thou wilt indeed deliver this people into my hand, then I will utterly destroy their cities. 21.2
God didn’t have to think about this one. Here’s how he responded.
The LORD hearkened to the voice of Israel, and delivered up the Canaanites. 21.3a
So the Israelites, with God’s help, killed everyone in several Canaanite cities.
And they utterly destroyed them and their cities. 21.3b
I’m glad we got this one over with. It was pretty boring, wasn’t it?
God’s next killing will be better, I promise.
The Bible doesn’t tell us the population of the Aradite cities. So I guessed there were 3 cities, each with 1000 people, for a total of 3000 victims.
