Duty to Love (2 page)

The
negotiations between Arthur and Francine's father couldn't have been pleasanter.
Whitmore had been excessively accommodating, happy to give Arthur a down
payment on the dowry in order that Arthur could settle with his creditors as
well as letting him have a couple of years to get his affairs in order before
the marriage need take place. To give Whitmore his due he wanted his daughter
to be happy as a Countess.

No
longer compelled to return James’s stare, Arthur moved to pour
himself
a drink. “I understood, we all understood, that I
was to marry Francine, but the contract I signed with Whitmore didn’t specify
which daughter. It was an oversight on my part and a canny move on Whitmore's.
According to the contract I am obliged to marry a Whitmore daughter, and as we
both well know Amelia is now his only daughter.”

Some
days Arthur felt bitter that he had been so skillfully manipulated. Whitmore
had been determined to gain a connection to the
Hentonbury
title for a long time, no matter the cost.

“Pour
me one, would you?” James paused his pacing long enough to take the measure of
whiskey Arthur poured him. Maybe it would calm him down. Arthur could hope.

“Surely
you could cancel the contract. Have you even talked to a lawyer?” James asked.

“I’ve
spent the money,” said Arthur with a bluntness he rarely directed at James.

“Spent
the money?” James appeared incredulous, although really it shouldn’t be a
surprise. James knew the debts their father had left behind. Arthur had assumed
it was one of the reasons James had been so keen to be able to support himself
in the Army, not to be an additional burden on Arthur.

“Yes,
I have received and spent a substantial sum of Whitmore’s money. I would have
married Francine two years ago, except her health took a sharp decline. Following
her death, the whole family was plunged into mourning, but still Whitmore found
time to visit me and bring the finer details of the contract to my attention.”

 
That was putting it politely, Arthur thought.

 
“It is my honor at stake. Whitmore would have
every right to call me out if I refused to marry Amelia. More likely he would
see my reputation ruined, and I would be unable to get credit or find another
suitable bride anywhere.” Arthur lifted his glass and drained half the
contents. “I am conscious of my duty in the situation, but let us be clear. I
want to marry Amelia.”

 
Arthur had known for years that while he
liked and admired Francine it was Amelia who could stir his deeper feelings if
he acknowledged them.

Francine,
poised, quietly caring, and loyal, with a good head for management, would have
made an excellent countess. Amelia, by contrast, was passionate, headstrong,
and full of an energy that drew others to her and enabled her to befriend
everyone.
 

Amelia
was all natural
woman
, a stunning combination of lithe
limbs and generous curves. She seemed unencumbered by a rigid posture, so often
maintained by other women; vitality seemed to flow through all her limbs. Even
her hair seemed full of life with its wayward curls. Her hair was a rich woody
brown, but where sunlight had danced through her curls copper trails had been
left behind. The shine of her hair along with the kiss of freckles spoke of
nature’s pleasure in her.

Arthur
took a great deal of pleasure in being in Amelia's company. She distracted him
from being too serious. She teased him; as did the thought of taking pleasure
in touching her whenever he was with her. Every time she tucked a wayward curl
behind her ear he had to resist the urge to set it free, to look her in the
eyes, to challenge her for control.

Amelia’s
eyes were a fascinating light brown, forthright, and giving of her undivided
attention. Looking into Amelia's eyes it was always too easy to become
enchanted.

Arthur
longed to have her eyes focused on his body, to watch as her eyes expressed a
dawning awareness of him as a man. Her gaze would be hot, a physical caress.

Arthur
was inclined to think that James also spent an equally ridiculous amount of
time imagining the pure sensual enjoyment of being with Amelia, a woman who
never held back in anything she did.

It
had always been Amelia whom both James and Arthur loved and desired.

To
anyone looking in and observing the three of them, Arthur had loved both James
and Amelia like an older brother while James and Amelia had been the best of
friends.

Arthur
had known the truth though. He knew the minute that James began to see Amelia
as more than a friend; he recognized the look of longing that he didn’t allow
to reach his own eyes.
 

Knowledge
of James's feelings for Amelia and his own duty to the title meant Arthur had
never allowed himself to consider Amelia more than a friend. He had intended to
be happily married to Francine, taking some small satisfaction from James being
happily married to Amelia.

He
had still longed though, longed for Amelia to see and desire him as a man, as
he desired her as a woman.

With
the change in his circumstances and Whitmore pushing for him to marry Amelia,
or pay the money back, Arthur had decided to court Amelia.

He
had proposed to her conflicted by hopeful anticipation and dread. The main
reason Arthur had never previously considered asking to marry Amelia was for
fear of creating discord between himself and James. Now it seemed inevitable.
Arthur prayed it might be short-lived.

Trying
to explain to James was proving difficult, but Arthur was determined to
persist.
 
“I'm not doing this to hurt
you, James. We haven't any choice; you know how father left the estate. It's
not just the hall that's run down. Roofs still need repairing on many of the
estate cottages. There were no investments remaining, just a long list of
creditors. Whitmore agreed to advance the dowry, and it's mostly spent. None of
us could have foreseen my marriage to Francine not going ahead. Her loss has
been difficult for us all, but Whitmore insists on buying his remaining
daughter a title, and we couldn't pay the money back even if he would take it.”

Arthur
knew that James understood the responsibility they had to the
Hentonbury
estate, not just because of the buildings and
land that had been in their family for years, but more importantly because of
the tenants and their families who worked the land to carve out a decent means
of living.

“You've
been gone four years, James. Did you think nothing would change? When her sister
was ill Amelia and I spent a lot of time together. I'm not saying you aren't
special to her, but she's grown up, grown to know me, and wants a marriage
between us.” Arthur filled a silence pressed upon him by James.

“I'm
just to return to the army then? A quick visit to witness the joyous occasion
of your marriage, if I'm lucky a quick listen to the sounds of you fucking her,
and then back to marching to the beat of the drum.”

Arthur’s
body snapped taut, physically taken aback by the crudeness of James’s words, not
the language itself, but the application of those words to thoughts of Amelia.
It was no bad thing though; if this conversation was going to go where he had
decided it must, they were going to need to speak frankly.

More
than anything, Arthur dreaded losing his brother's respect and affection as a
result of the current situation. He had already had to swallow his pride in
order to accept and precipitously spend Francine's dowry. It had left a bitter
aftertaste and the fear that in marrying Amelia he would alienate James.

Despite
his desire for Amelia, if that were his only consideration he wouldn't dream of
hurting James, the brother he had always taken care of.

  
Maybe it was a good sign that James had
admitted he would listen to Arthur and Amelia on their wedding night. There had
to be some way forward that concerned all three of them, or there would forever
be divisions among them.

For
the past year Arthur had been trying to think of ways that he could fulfill his
duty, make Amelia happy, and ensure that he and James weren't estranged. At
first the more he thought about it the more impossible it seemed. He was
resolved to marry Amelia; he was resolved to try and make her happy—with him—which
left his relationship with James at risk.
 
Not only would James never forgive him for the betrayal, but he wouldn't
be happy without Amelia, especially with Amelia married to another man, most especially
with Amelia married to him. Some things irrevocably shaped one’s life forever.

Then
Arthur had wondered if he could marry Amelia in name only and let her and James
develop a relationship if they so desired. It wasn't uncommon in arranged
marriages for one or both spouses to have affairs. Actually he hadn’t wondered.
It was more that the question had occurred to him, and he’d instantly dismissed
it.

He
wanted a real marriage with Amelia, which meant building trust. He didn't think
he could live with betrayal. Although he'd dismissed the idea immediately it
did lead him to wondering if there was any chance both he and James could have
a relationship with Amelia, at the same time. She would have to be willing, and
they would need to be honest with each other and not get jealous. However, he
knew jealousy would gnaw at him and probably James as well, and it wouldn't be
long before all their relationships were destroyed, including his with Amelia.

The
only solution Arthur thought might bring them all a measure of happiness was if
the three of them could somehow construct a relationship together. A relationship
where they all lived together, all shared emotional ties, and all shared the
marriage bed, where there were no secrets or divisive arrangements to cause
jealousy.
 

How
to broach the subject and get all parties to give the prospect serious
consideration was the challenge Arthur had been grappling with since he’d come
to the conclusion it might be possible to all share a marriage together if they
all truly loved each other. The problem was Arthur didn't know how deeply
Amelia really felt about him or James.

Suggesting
a ménage could result in Arthur losing both James and Amelia, or it could
result in them all gaining a great deal of love and happiness.

Arthur
wasn't usually a man to take risks, but he valued not giving up and being in
control of his own destiny far above letting a contract dictate his happiness
and the happiness of those he loved.

Taking
a sip of whiskey Arthur took a moment to choose his next words with care.
Slowly, slowly, was his mantra to himself.
 
He intended to bring James round to the idea first, and then together
they could introduce the idea to Amelia, showing her it could work rather than
scaring her by suggesting something her upbringing would not have prepared her
for.
 

“I
would be happy for you to resign your commission and return home—God knows the
estate needs us both—but I will not have you undermining my marriage. You will
have to accept Amelia and
me
together, or there will
be no alternative but for you to leave. James, I don't want it to come to that.
You are my only sibling, and you must know how dearly I hold you in my
affections.” There hadn't been a week gone by that Arthur hadn't written to
James while he was absent.

“I
don't know if I can bear it, Arthur. Whitmore refused to let me make an offer
for Amelia, saying I must wait for you and Francine to be married first. Given
no choice I determined to wait while never ceasing to love her, need her.”
James paused a moment, dragging a hand though his hair, before continuing. “Can
you say you are celibate? I have been since four years ago when Amelia turned sixteen,
and I knew I would not betray her, the woman I loved.”

James's
confession offered in a voice gruff with sincerity stunned Arthur. The
intensity of the emotions that James revealed convinced Arthur he was doing the
right thing in proposing they should both be allowed to show their love to
Amelia.

“Not
four years, no,” Arthur said honestly. “I would have been faithful to Francine
once our vows were made, but I was not waiting for her. However, since her
death and with the knowledge that I could marry Amelia I have had no desire for
dalliances.”

It
was fair to say he had never really desired them before. Sexual relations with
any woman inevitably found him making comparisons with Amelia. He would fondle
a woman's breasts all the while thinking that Amelia's looked as if they would
feel firmer, fuller. Plunging into a warm cunt led him to wonder if Amelia
would be tighter, wetter. He might not have been celibate for four years, but
Amelia was the only woman he had been having sex with in his mind.

“This
isn't a competition, James, to see who loves Amelia most. At least I sincerely
don't want it to be. I think Amelia has loved us both as friends for several
years while her feelings have deepened for me this past year. I had thought we
might all be able to be happy living together.” Arthur whispered the last
sentence.