e (48 page)

Not what you think. He’s reconnecting my PC to the printer. He’ll be done in about . . . um . . . six minutes.

	[email protected] 1/10/00, 11:13am
to:	[email protected]
cc:
re:	jobs II

Don’t worry, Si, darling, all requests in hand. Pinki is still being funny about sending you Coke stuff so maybe you should e her direct. By the way, I’m having terrible trouble with the new girl, Lorraine. I don’t think she’s going to be “one of us.”

	Lorraine Pallister – 1/10/00, 11:16am
to:	Zoë Clarke
cc:
re:	help!

Fancy lunch? Only been on this floor ten minutes and Susi is already getting right on my tits. Need to know how the fuck you handled her.

	Zoë Clarke – 1/10/00, 11:19am
to:	Lorraine Pallister
cc:
re:	help!

Bar Zero, 1:00. I’ll give you the full monty on the cow!!!!!! Zxxx

	[email protected] 1/10/00, 11:34am
to:	[email protected]
cc:
re:	Coke

I hope this reaches you in Mauritius without getting chewed up and spat out in cyberspace. Everything is going well, I trust. I’ve just been going through your draft of the Coke presentation and I have to say that there are some bits that didn’t make complete sense. I hope
you don’t mind but I’m going to have a bash at rewriting it. Of course I’ll fax my attempt to you upon completion. I’d appreciate your input.

	[email protected] 1/10/00, 12:11pm (4:11pm local)
to:	[email protected]
cc:
re:	Coke

Susi tells me that you are reluctant to forward the Coke work to me.

You cannot have forgotten already that “IT’S IN THE CAN” is
my
idea.

Nor will you fail to remember that it was only my trust in you that enabled you to be promoted in my absence.

Bearing those two things in mind, you will fax the work to me forthwith.

Si

	[email protected] 1/10/00, 12:14pm
to:	[email protected]
cc:
re:	Coke

Simon, it is honestly not my idea not to send you the Coke work. David is adamant that he see everything first. I’m sorry, but I can’t go against him on this. Of course I’ll get everything to you as soon as he approves it . . . 

	[email protected] 1/10/00, 12:18pm (4:18pm local)
to:	[email protected]
cc:
re:	migraine, migraine . . .

Add Migraleve to package.

	Lorraine Pallister – 1/10/00, 12:26pm
to:	Creative Department
cc:
re:	reminder

Pinki has asked me to remind you that the creative gangbang starts in five in the boardroom. Enjoy.

	[email protected] 1/10/00, 12:30pm (4:30pm local)
to:	[email protected]
cc:
re:	DATELINE MAURITIUS: DAY 1

Just read your e. Sure I’ve seen that Coke line somewhere before. It’s bugging me now. I’ll ask Vin when he gets out of the shower. Just got back from his location search. Says all the beaches were shite and Mel and Nathan both got stung by jellyfish. Vin reckoned his O’Neill wetsuit saved him (£200 well spent then). Horne still hasn’t emerged from the honeymoon suite and he’s got a room service waiter on permanent standby. You should see Westbrooke. He’s one of those fashion tragedies who wears his socks on the beach. He’s spent the day running after the client who’s cruising the deckchairs like a fat, sweaty David Hasselhoff. Got to go. Mandi has put my Deep Heat on her sunburn and she’s squealing like a piglet. She’s none too bright but she’s got BJ lips (collagen is
A Good Thing
).