Easier to Run (20 page)

“All right, thanks.”

“I also called to tell you to get decent. I’m coming back to the apartment.”

I grunted and shook my head. “What makes you think I wouldn’t be?”

“My mind lives in the gutter. You really have to ask?”

“So you’re leaving your poor girlfriend to console Liz?”

“Hey, apparently the girl code is hoes before boyfriends… or something like that.”

As long as I’d lived with him, sometimes the things that came out of his mouth still surprised me. “You better not let either of them hear you say that.”

“I say a lot of things I wouldn’t let Paige hear. Liz is another story. Now get on some pants, or stay in your room. I’ll be there in fifteen.” He hung up.

“Everything okay?” Cassie asked.

“My roommate is insane,” I shrugged. “But that just means everything is pretty much normal. Liz seems to be reigned in.”

“He seems to know her well.”

“He should, he’s her step-brother.” I realized I had forgotten to mention that golden tidbit.

“Oh,” her eyes widened. “That’s awkward.”

“Yeah,” I dropped my gaze back to my phone for a moment. “But not in the ways that you’d think. His girlfriend is her friend and former roommate, so yeah… kind of a mess.”

“So which one did you meet first?”

“Brantley, he started with the Remington about five years ago. We’ve been living here for four. He’s a good guy, bit of a perv, but you spend as much time alone in a semi as we do and you”—I drummed my fingers on the counter—”find interesting ways to entertain yourself.”

“I don’t think I want to know.” She scrunched her face. “And considering your dad was a truck driver…. No. That’s not a curiosity I want to consider entertaining.”

I laughed and captured her waist again. “Why do you think it’s so easy for me to talk to Dad about anything?”

“No, Ben.” She shook her head. “No. I will never be able to face your dad again.”

She rested her hands on my shoulders and leaned into me. “Can we just skip dinner and go back to bed?”

“You’re still sleepy?”

“Not really. It just seems like a good day to curl up in bed and forget about the world outside.”

I chuckled and rubbed the back of her neck. “Brantley is on his way back.”

“Even better reason to shut out the world,” she said, staring down.

“Why?”

“Because,” she scoffed. “Do I really have to explain? He probably thinks I’m more nuts than your ex. And now he also knows… about everything.”

“He doesn’t think you’re nuts, Cas.”

She shook her head and pulled away.

I wondered about the best way to go about asking her if she’d start seeing a local doctor. But at the moment, I was afraid that’d push her too hard at once.

“So, what are the dinner options?” she asked after a long silence. Then, she pointed at me. “Do not say pizza or peanut butter.”

I couldn’t answer for a moment because I was shocked at the turn. She had the “pretending everything is okay” act down so well, I was almost fooled. Except for the abruptness of it all. “I picked up stuff for taco salad.”

She perked up. “
The
taco salad?”

“Is there any other kind?”

“Then what are you waiting for? Get cooking some hamburger.” She smacked me lightly on the hip.

“Damn, you’re bossy.” I was still hesitant to take my eyes off of her, fearing the change in attitude could just as easily swing in the opposite direction.

She smiled and caught me by the waist as I passed. “I know you’re worried about me,” she whispered. “I’m dealing the only way I know how. I just need to keep moving.” She gave me a withering smile. “I’ll call my therapist tomorrow to see if I can get a referral. Among the millions of things to do tomorrow, I guess. I’m trying.”

“I know, sweetie.” I lifted her knuckles to my lips and kissed each of them. “I’m trying, too.”

“Sometimes I just need to keep my mind off of it all. Especially when the thoughts are bombarding me a million times faster than I can handle. So, I divert and go in a different direction.”

“Okay,” I said. “How about you start washing up the lettuce and tomatoes. I got a bar of jalapeno cheese that needs grated up, too.”

“I can do that.” She grinned, and I watched the tension slowly fade from her face again.

By the time Brantley came home, we were only waiting for the meat to finish cooking.

“Damn,” Brantley said when he walked in the door—case of beer in hand. “Now this is something I’m not used to walking in to.”

He sat the twenty-four pack of bottled Yuengling on the counter.

“That’s a lot of b-beer,” Cassie said.

“I need a lot of beer,” he said, ripping out a bottle. “Beer makes the world go ‘round. Want one, man? Fresh from the beer cave.”

“No thanks,” I said, stirring the meat one last time. Ordinarily I would have jumped at the offer, but I wasn’t interested in setting Cassie off again. “For Brantley, it’s either beer or sex,” I said, nudging her.

“It’s a wonder he can d-drive a truck.”

Brantley’s beer hissed as he popped off the top. “She’s a smart-ass. I think I like her.”

I peeked over my shoulder. “As long as you like her from a distance.”

“Oh,” he put up his hands. “Already have these hands full with my own, but I’ll enjoy watching her give you a hard time.”

“Hamburger is ready.” I moved it to a cool burner and switched off the stove. Then, I grabbed the bag of Doritos off the fridge and handed them to Cassie. “Ladies first.”

She rolled her eyes but wasn’t going to argue. She snatched the bag and poured a layer out on her plate, followed by hamburger, cheese, lettuce, tomato, and Catalina dressing. I grew up on the salad—we usually had it when Dad came back from the road. And Mom had gotten Cassie addicted to the salad the first time she ate it.

After dinner, Cassie and I washed up the kitchen, then left Brantley on the couch, messaging on his cell phone and finishing off his third or fourth beer.

“Remember your glove, man,” he yelled just before I closed the door.

Cassie crossed her arms and gave me an indignant stare.

“Yeah,” I said. “I’d tell you he’s not usually like that—”

“But it’d be a total lie?”

I nodded. “You catch on fast.”

She tapped the side of her head. “I did skip two grades, once upon a time.”

“Right,” I said with a laugh.

She picked up her phone, checked the screen, then tossed it back down. “Did you see the text?”

“From your grandma? Yeah.”

Cassie pulled the bun out of her hair and shook it out. It fell in waves and curls around her face. “And people wonder why I’m always stressed.”

I half heard the words, but mostly I was lost in a moment where I just wanted to stare at her. She tilted her head and smiled. “How about we don’t talk about that?”

“What would you like to talk about?” My mouth was watering, but my throat suddenly felt parched.
Time
, I told myself,
she needs time to heal
.

She stared down for a moment. “I don’t.”

Don’t you dare take that as more than she means
. What exactly did she mean?

Cassie

He stared at me blinking rapidly for a few seconds. I wondered if he was ever going to move.

I wanted to know only him. For him to kiss my neck again like he had in the kitchen. To make my knees go weak. To make my mind go blank.

I wanted to feel his touch, his kiss, his breath on my skin.

I had wanted it the whole time we’d been in the kitchen. Longer than that. But I didn’t know how to say it. How to tell him.

Especially since I’d freaked out the last time we’d gotten remotely close.

“Ben,” I whispered, and he stepped closer but not close enough. I wanted to feel again. I wanted my heart to race for a damn good reason.

I met him at the foot of the bed, standing on my toes to kiss him. He caressed my face with one hand and placed the other at the small of my back, drawing me closer. This time, I felt like the aggressor, flicking at his lips with my tongue. But he didn’t leave me in control for long. Our tongues dueled out our unspoken fight as he pushed me backward against the bed. My knees gave way and I sat down, pulling him with me.

He leaned over me, hands planted on the bed next to me. His energy pouring down on me. Quickening my pulse. I kept my hands clasped behind his neck never breaking the kiss.

The kiss was hungry, passionate, yet never enough. He broke away and pulled back fist, leaving me breathless, and even more anxious to continue.

“You sure?”

I nodded.

He pushed me across the bed, moving me back until we were in the center of the bed. Then, he pressed down on me again and straddled my hips. His kiss was relentless, pinning me to the bed.

I couldn’t move. His body pressed down on me, not enough to feel suffocating or make me panic. Quite the opposite. I was his. I was safe.

He sat back and pulled his shirt over his head. The sight of his chest quickened my breath and gave me goosebumps. How could I feel so warm while my skin reacted as if I was freezing cold? His fingertips moved across my waist in delicate touches near where his thighs straddled me. He traced the hem of my tank top, then inched the fabric up slowly, and I lifted my back to help until he pulled the shirt over my head.

I teetered on the precipice between nerves and arousal.

He leaned over me again, covering my exposed skin with his body, pressing a quick kiss to my lips. Then, he pulled away and trailed slow sensual kisses down my neck and across my collarbone.

He traced the top lining of each cup of my flimsy bra, then kissed down my stomach to my belly button. Stopping just shy of the button on my shorts.

He looked to my face again for permission before his fingers moved to the blue fabric.

I nodded, trying not to let my nervousness shine through. He unfastened the shorts, then left them there while he unfastened his jeans and discarded them off the foot of the bed. He moved to kneel beside me and inched my shorts down my legs.

His hot calloused hand moved up my leg, then my stomach, while he reached over to the side table with his other hand and fished around for a moment. He palmed the condom and left it under the edge of the pillow next to my head.

He cupped my cheek and pressed his thumb to my lips. “We stop whenever you want.”

I nodded, not trusting my mouth to even make a sound.

“No matter what,” he said. “Just say it.”

“Okay,” I managed on a shaky breath.

He lay on his side beside me and took my mouth again, his erection pressing at me through the thin material of his boxer briefs. His finger slid into the waistband of my underwear.

Then, his hand slid down the front.

I inhaled sharply drawing in the heated air from our kiss.

I felt like I’d hyperventilate.

My legs parted for him, without my thinking about it. And a moan brushed past my lips as he slid a finger inside of me.

I closed my eyes. Tried not to think. Tried to let my body go. I followed his lead. Panting as his fingers stretched me, and his thumb massaged my sensitive clit.

“Shhh,” he whispered into my ear, with a hint of a chuckle. “Let’s not give my roomie too much to talk about tomorrow.”

The thought should have embarrassed me. But it made my pulse run quicker and my blood run hotter until I ached for more.

Ben slid my underwear down my legs and flipped it off the foot of the bed, then be moved to kneel between my legs. He kissed the insides of my thighs, the sensitive skin near my hips and up my stomach, to where my breasts giggled with each sharp breath. He stopped at my face, hovering above me and smiling. “You’re so fucking gorgeous.”

I reached down and pulled at the waistband of his boxer briefs, and his eyes closed over for a moment before he quickly shed them. He ripped open the condom pack, slipping the rubber up his long, hard shaft. I grabbed ahold of the sheets next to me and squeezed the material.

This was it.

Not like I hadn’t ever experienced it before. But… I hadn’t.

This was different. New.

Terrifying.

Beautiful.

He didn’t enter me right away, instead, his hot penis pressed against me as he resumed kissing my neck and chest until my hips pushed at his, and I didn’t think I could take it anymore.

Then, he pushed inside of me, slowly and gently until he filled me and stretched me.

I squeaked when his pelvis pressed into mine, then I bit my lip. Wondering if that was the first noise I’d let slip.

And how much of an earful Brantley was getting in the next room.

Then again, I didn’t care.

Ben’s first thrusts were slow, filling me then leaving me strangely empty.

I wrapped my legs around his hips. No thrust was ever enough. I wanted him to consume me. His pace quickened and I met his thrusts, rocking up to meet him so that he filled every millimeter of space.

I grabbed at his hips, his back, his neck. Anywhere to get a handhold for more than a second as I squirmed under him.

I moaned, and he covered my mouth with his capturing most of the sound.

More
. I arched my back and grabbed at the top of the mattress.

He slid a hand below me, lifting up my hips as he thrust.

I moaned and tried to keep my cries quiet, but the coos slipped by my dry lips.

Ben paused, raising up over me and putting one hand on the top of the headboard.

I couldn’t take it. I squirmed and wiggled, trying to press him deeper inside me again, but he just smiled down at me, enjoying the torture he was putting me through.

Then, he squeezed the headboard using it as leverage as he slammed into me.

I cried out, pressing one hand into his bicep and the other into his side as the bed creaked, popped, and groaned beneath our shifting weight.

The heat in my stomach grew, then suddenly exploded, taking everything I knew with it. Ben continued thrusting and jerking wildly with his own climax as I rode wave after wave of my own.

I dropped my legs to the bed, and he rolled off of me, sliding off the condom and dropping it into the trashcan next to the bed.

“Holy shit,” I said.

Ben chuckled. “Now there’s a reaction.

“There’s no way Brantley didn’t hear that,” I whispered. My cheeks were already flushed and hot.

“May as well go big, right?” Ben nudged me over and pulled the covers up around us.

“Can we do that every night?” I asked my brain still running on autopilot.

“We do that every night, and we’ll have to replace my bed once a month.”

I curled up against the heat of his chest. “It’s not like you ever sleep in it.”

He laughed again, pressing his lips to my neck so I could feel the sound waves. “Very true.”