Emergence (Awakening Series Book 2) (7 page)

Chapter 11

1 year ago

Lou

"What do you mean, you're 'getting a divorce'? Derek is your soul mate, your once in a lifetime..."

I sighed, having expected Charlie, my twin, to balk at my mention of divorce.

"He's not my soul mate, Charlie. He's changed, and he's become someone I just can't be around."

"Lou, you need to really think about this. You can't just go throwing your marriage out the window without even trying to fix it."

"I have been trying. I've tried everything," I said, exasperated.

"Well, you obviously aren't trying hard enough."

Her words caused me to flinch, searing my heart with their derision. Charlie was my best friend, my twin, my family. How could she not be on my side?

"Have you heard a word I've said over the last two years? He's become emotionally and sexually abusive, and he's been unfaithful! We've talked and talked about it. I've forgiven him only to have him do it again. I've tried to get him to go to counseling but he doesn't even have the balls to show up. I'm done, Charlie, completely done."

"Do you even hear yourself Lou? It isn't like you've got it so bad. Derek loves you and he takes care of you. That's worth something in my book. Just because you're going through a rough patch doesn't mean it's time to throw in the towel. "

I rolled my eyes, thankful that we were talking on the phone and not in person. Charlie and her husband, Aiden, had been married almost as long as Derek and I, and their relationship was anything but perfect. She was the last person I should be taking advice from.

Aiden's gone all the time for work, never calls, comes home in the middle of the night from "meetings", which in my opinion are probably of the indecent variety, rarely spends time with Charlie and their daughter, Margaret, and blows obscene amounts of money on nothing but stuff.

Charlie told me they had to take out a second mortgage on their home, but yet  Aiden goes out and buys Armani suits and Tumi luggage that he "needs" for business travel. Not to mention he's obsessed with keeping up with the Jones' and insisted on Margaret attending the most prestigious school in the area, even though there was no way they would even be able to pay off that debt. With two houses, one with a second mortgage, thirty thousand dollars in credit card debt and climbing, two brand new cars, private school tuition, only one income and an unhappy marriage, they were in a lose lose situation.

"Look Charlie, just because you choose to stand by your man, even though you're miserable, doesn't mean I have to do the same. I want more for myself. I want to be happy, and Derek doesn't make me happy."

"I am not miserable!" she said.

I rolled my eyes to myself. She was miserable, that much I knew for sure. In fact, sometimes I thought that Charlie wanted me to stay with Derek just because she wanted me to be unhappy too. Misery loves company, as they say.

**

"I swear Liz, it was like she wanted me to stay married to Derek even though I'm unhappy. What is that all about?"

"Lou, you're doing the right thing. Don't worry about pleasing everyone else. You aren't happy, he's treating you like shit. No one should have to go through what you've been through. You've tried a million times to get him to open up, to talk to you about what's going on, to get him to go to counseling, and nothing's working. I think you're making the right decision by walking away. Nobody likes to throw in the towel, but it's time."

I sighed with relief, feeling lucky to have Liz. Who else would sit and listen to me talk about my problems for hours on end, and encourage me to make the hardest decision of my life? Certainly not my sister.

"Have you told Derek yet?" Liz asked, taking a sip of her wine.

"Not yet. I still need to figure out a few things. I keep waiting for the call from that job I interviewed for in Savannah too. That's really going to be the deciding factor in when I can afford to move out."

Liz reached over and put her hand over mine.

"Don't wait too long Lou, it's only going to make things harder. You know you can always stay with us if you need to. You can store some things in our garage, and we can even help you move out if you need us to."

"Aww, thank you! That really means so much to me. You've been incredible to me." Liz rolls her eyes. "No really, you've been an amazing friend, and I really am so glad to have you in my life. Where else would I get free therapy sessions and wine?"

I clinked my glass against hers and we laughed. The next day I had a doctor's appointment, and I vowed that afterwards I would start making plans.

Chapter 12

Present

Lou

"Hey sweetie!" I said, opening the door to Charlie and Margaret, who were visiting for the weekend.

Margaret threw her arms around my knees while Charlie struggled to get through the door with their bags.

"How was the drive?" I asked. They lived in Raleigh, North Carolina. It was about a five hour drive.

"Not too bad. Miss Priss watched Mickey Mouse Clubhouse the whole way here though, and I swear if I never hear that hot dog song again, it'll be too soon."

I laughed and picked up my niece.

"Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggity dog," I sang as I bounced her around the room, her dark pigtails swinging back and forth framed by red ribbons.

"Ugh," Charlie groaned. "I need a drink!"

"Me too!" I said. "Kelly will be over in about an hour to watch the girls and you and I are going to this really cool martini bar I found downtown. You're going to love it."

**

Charlie tugged on a strand of her dark pixie cut hair while swirling her martini in the glass. We're fraternal twins, and we don't look exactly alike, but it's easy to tell we're sisters. Charlie's hair is straight, where mine has a natural wave. Her eyes are blue like mine, but they're not as large, and she's also several inches shorter than me, and curvier.

Her eyes met mine over her martini glass and she asked me, "Have you talked to Derek lately?"

"Charlie...." I huffed.

"Come on Lou, you were married to the man for almost four years. He was upset when you left him, and I'm just wondering if you've talked to him at all."

I sighed and leaned back in my chair. I really didn't want to have this conversation with her because I knew where it would lead, but I hoped we could get it out of the way and then enjoy the rest of our weekend together.

"No, Charlie, I haven't talked to him since I picked up the rest of my things from our storage unit. He calls me a few times a month, but I don't answer. I have nothing to say."

"He misses you Lou."

"And how do you know that?" I asked, narrowing my eyes.

"I talk to him pretty often. He's Margaret's godfather, you know? I want to make sure he stays a part of her life so we Skype."

I rolled my eyes and let out a big puff of air.

"He wants you back Lou. I swear he's changed. He wants you and Carly to be his family," she continued.

At her statement my eyes grew wide and my heart started pounding in my chest.

"Do you even remember what he said about Carly when I told him about her?"

"He didn't mean it, Lou. He's tried to call and apologize, but you won't even answer the phone. If you would just talk to him, you'd see what I see. He's changed, I promise. You could have the old Derek back."

"Look, Charlie, I know you two were close, and I know he's Margaret's godfather, and if you want to keep in touch with him, I guess I can accept that, but let's get one thing straight. I am not ever getting back together with Derek. I'm happier right now than I've ever been in my entire life, and I don't need him, nor do I want him. I wish you would quit perpetuating the problem. Don't encourage him to get back together with me because it's not happening."

"He made some mistakes is all. You should be more willing to forgive. Everyone deserves a second chance. He's willing to forgive you too. Plus, don't you want Carly to have a father?"

"I've met someone," I blurted out, hoping to put a stop to all this Derek talk. "We're just getting to know each other, but we have a special bond, and I'm really excited about seeing where things go."

"Oh yeah? What does he have to say about Carly?" she asked.

"He doesn't know about her yet."

"You need to tell him soon, Lou. If things get serious with him, he deserves to know. Not every man is willing to raise someone else's child."

**

"Liz, what do you think I should do?" I asked, switching the phone from one ear to the other.

"I think you should go with your gut, Lou, but I agree with Charlie that you need to tell Carson about Carly. He deserves to know so he can decide if he wants to be an active part of your lives or not. Regardless of what idiocy Charlie spewed about Derek, she's definitely on the right track with Carson."

I sighed. Telling Carson about Carly was something I felt like I needed to do on one hand, but on the other, I wanted to get to know him better and see what kind of a role model he would be for her. I didn't even feel like I knew him all that well myself, and I was concerned about putting her on his radar. Although, if I was completely honest with myself, that was pretty much just a lie I told myself so I could feel better about keeping it from him until I could work up the nerve to be honest.

"I know you're right," I said, "it's just going to be one of the hardest things I've ever had to do," I said thinking about the conversation Carson and I had had where we agreed not to keep things from each other.

"Listen Lou, if he's the kind of guy you think he is, it won't matter to him at all. He'll accept her and he'll be thrilled to have her in his life, along with you. You'll see."

As I thanked Liz for her advice and hung up the phone, I prayed that she was right about Carson, and that he wouldn't disappoint me when I finally told him about Carly.

Just then the phone rang in my hand and I looked down to see Derek calling. Rolling my eyes I ignored it. It's like his ears were burning or something.

Chapter 13

Carson

The weekend flew by in a flash. Friday after work I'd spent looking for apartments again, and not having any luck.

Lou's sister was in town for a visit and had the whole weekend planned out already since she'd never been to Savannah before in her adult life. I was a little frustrated because I had just found Lou again and wasn't ready to let her out of my sight yet, but I also didn't want to come off as overly possessive since I got the idea that she'd had enough of that with her ex.

I thought about staying in Savannah to hang out with Caroline for the weekend but she wasn't up for being very good company. Apparently Luke's mother was less than accepting of her relationship with Luke because Caroline had previously been engaged to Luke's brother Mark.

It was a complicated story but Caroline saw Luke's mother's rejection of her as the last straw, and she was refusing to see reason. I talked with her until I was blue in the face, trying to convince her that it didn't matter what Luke's mom thought as long as she and Luke loved each other.

She wasn't in the mood to listen to reason so I packed a bag and hightailed it to Bluffton to help my parents clean out the last few closets in my grandmother's house, tossing out the junk and setting aside anything with a potential value.

By the time I made it back to Savannah on Sunday I was thoroughly exhausted.  I'd hit the shower, texted Lou goodnight with no response, and crawled into my bed. I passed out as soon as my face hit the pillow.

After my Monday morning run and my second cup of coffee, I found myself seated behind my desk wondering how long I should wait before calling Lou. Not having seen her in three days, I was chomping at the bit for some contact, and knowing she was just a floor above me was making me anxious.

Fuck it.

I decided to send her and e-mail. That way, in case she was busy, she could answer it in her own time.

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Subject: Singing The Blues

Lou,

I hope you and Charlie enjoyed your weekend together.

It's been three days since I've seen your beautiful face and I think if I have to wait another moment I'll go mad. Mad I tell you!

Can I treat you to lunch today?

- Carson

I pressed send as soon as I finished typing and then leaned back in my chair, folding my hands over my head and willing my Outlook notification to ding.

I didn't have to wait long.

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: Cry Me A River

Carson,

Charlie and I had a wonderful time exploring the city. I think I discovered as many exciting new things as she did.

I don't know why, but I never even thought about you working here. How did that not come up before?

Lunch sounds excellent. B. Matthew's Bakery? Meet me in the lobby at 12:30. I'll be the one with the giant smile on her face.

XO, Lou

Feeling relieved for the moment, knowing I would see her shortly, I dug into my work, only looking up when my dad poked his head into my office.

"Lunch today son?"

I checked the clock, noting it was 12:28.

"Sorry dad, I'm taking Lou. Rain check?" I asked, standing up and walking around the desk toward the door.

"Sounds good Carson. Tell Lou hello for me. Your mother and I would love it if you both could come out to Bluffton for dinner some night. Maybe this weekend?"

"I'll talk to Lou about it at lunch," I said, slipping past him on my way to the lobby.

Lou looked damn sexy in her black pencil skirt and heels. Her hair was pulled up into a bun on top of her head and her bright blue eyes were laser focused on me as soon as I was in her line of sight.

"There's my girl," I said, kissing her on the cheek as I slipped my arm around her waist and guided her towards the door.

It felt so good to have her in my arms again, and as soon as we made it to the side of my truck, I pushed her against it, sliding my hand up to the nape of her neck and crushing her lips with my kiss.

Our tongues worked in tandem, setting my veins on fire. When I pulled back from her we were both breathless.

"I missed you," I said against her swollen lips.

"The feeling's mutual," she whispered back.

"So, my parents want us to come to the house for dinner this weekend. Think you're up for it?"

"Let's talk about it over lunch," she suggested, giving me pause. I got the distinct impression that there was something she wasn't saying, but I decided to brush it off until after lunch. Hoping she would tell me whatever it was then.

After helping her into the truck, and driving down to the restaurant, we ordered our food and I waited for it while she went to find a table. Once I brought the food over and sat down I noticed she looked uncomfortable.

"You okay?" I asked, unfolding my napkin, my eyes searching her gorgeous face.

"Carson, before we go any further with this, there's something you should know," she said, keeping her eyes on her lap.

My nerves spiked and my brain was going ninety miles a minute as a million possible scenarios ran through my head.

Was she sick? Did she have a sordid past? Different sexual proclivities? What? I waited with baited breath for her to tell me whatever she needed to say.