Emily's Affair (30 page)

Finally
, Jake thought and took a step towards her. "Was it?"

"You know it was." Her breathing came in short, jerky gasps. She was livid and Jake was glad for it. He'd take anything, but her cold silence.

"How do I know that?" Jake circled the desk and stalked slowly, steadily towards her. "You spent the majority of our brief association convincing me that it was just sex. Remember? Weren't you the one who claimed you were wrong for me?"

"
You
were wrong for
me
," she shouted back.

Good, he thought, let it all out, Emily. "And who would be right for you?" Jake halted an arm's length away from her. "What other man would bend over backwards to accommodate you?"

The sandal in her hand shook and tears filled her luminous eyes. "A million other men would jump at the chance to have me!"

"Name one," he dared.

A tense silence staccatoed with their heavy breathing filled the room. Jake braced himself, knowing what he had to do and knowing that if this last effort didn't get her attention, then nothing else would.

"You can't, because—" Jake's hand snaked out and caught her by the back of the neck. "I'm the only one." He claimed her mouth in a hard punishing kiss which tested the limits of his shaky control. God, he wanted her.
Badly
. But he couldn't take her. She had to come to him.

It was all or nothing. No in-between. All or nothing.

Emily melted into his arms and sagged against him. She opened to him as always and welcomed his assault with a passion which mirrored his own frustration. It took all his willpower to end the kiss, but he did and gazed down on her flushed features.

Her lashes fluttered up and he took in the emotions swirling in her indigo eyes. Jake watched as her desire faded to be replaced by a tired, wary, vulnerability that signified the return of his sweet, innocent Emily and the departure of cold, show-no-emotion-but-anger Lee. He could stand here and look at her all day, but wanted more than that. He wanted all or nothing.

And so he said in a cool, detached voice, "I gave you every chance, Emily, and you didn't give me a single one."

Pain so acute it hurt to look into her exquisite features filled her expression and Jake released her.

It was up to Emily now.

All or nothing. That's what he wanted. All or nothing.

Jake took one long, last look at her, then turned on his heel and walked out for the last time.

Emily slammed the mailbox door shut, then swiped up her sandal and marched for the stairs. Tears streamed down her cheeks and she fought the urge to run after
him
.

If only he hadn't kissed her.

But he had. And she hated him for it. She had been doing just fine pretending that he didn't exist. That he'd dropped off the face of the earth.

"Ha! Like I would ever give him a chance." Emily jerked open the door to her floor and stomped down the hallway. "He doesn't deserve so much as a—"

"Emily."

Emily stopped dead in her tracks.
Oh no
. It couldn't be. Not today. Please, God, don't let it be who I think it is, she screamed in her mind. She looked up and came face to face with a tall, elegantly dressed woman with dark blue eyes and long black hair which held not so much as one strand of silver.

"Mom."

Amé Stafford smiled. "You remember."

"Not by choice," Emily muttered under her breath. She unrooted her feet and covered the distance between them. Why today? Of all the days in the year her mother could have shown up unannounced, why today? Her hands shook as she unlocked the door and shoved it open.

Amé didn't wait to be invited in, because she probably knew Emily wasn't about to utter the words. "Oh, what a charming place."

Emily dropped her mail and keys on the hallway table, then headed for the kitchen. She needed a drink. Anything to get the taste and feel of Jake out of her mouth.

Her mother trailed after her.

Emily poured herself a glass of Kool-Aid. It was Jake's fault she was drinking Kool-Aid.

"Mind if I fix myself something to drink," her mother asked, opening the cabinet where the glass were stored.

Emily waved a hand and forced down another gulp of the overly sweet, pseudo-fruit drink.

Amé moved down the counter and stopped next to Emily. "Is that what I think it is?"

"Yep."

"You hate Kool-Aid."

"Yep." Emily managed to get down another swallow.

"Then why are you drinking it?"

Emily stared down into the dark red liquid and wondered if there was any way to make this stuff sweeter. It was saturated with sugar. "I promised the doctor I'd forgo my normal twenty cups of coffee a day."

"Oh. I see." Amé picked up the pitcher and poured herself a very small glass. "I suppose twenty cups a day is a bit excessive."

Emily turned her head to study her mother's profile. "You once swore that you would never go to a plastic surgeon."

Amé smirked and glanced at her. "That was before I had crow's feet."

"He did a good job."

"I like to think so."

"How much did it cost?"

"More than I'd like to admit."

Emily held out her glass and watched as her mother refilled it. "Mom, what are you doing here?"

Amé sighed. "I'm here to visit my daughter. I haven't seen you in—"

"No. The real reason."

Amé set the pitcher on the counter and stared straight ahead at the cabinet. "Emily, I—"

"Are you out of money? That must be it. Well, let me get my checkbook and we can end this charade of a family reunion."

"Emily. Please. This is hard enough as it is."

"You brought it on yourself."

"So I did," Amé murmured. She drew in a deep breath. "Emily, I've changed."

"I'll say you have. Last time I saw you, you were stoned off your—"

"That was three years ago and if you came and visited me once in a while you would know that I gave up the drugs."

"Gave up which drugs? The sniffable drugs or the—"

"All of them."

"When?"

Amé held her head high. "It'll be two years tomorrow."

"Well, congratulations. I am so happy for you. Wow. Two whole years. You must be feeling great."

"Don't you dare mock me, Emily Katherine Stafford. You have no idea how hard it was for me to do it alone."

"No, I don't. But then again, I've never drank, smoked, or done any drugs which weren't prescribed by a licensed practitioner." Emily pushed off from the counter.

"Emmie, I want to make it up to you."

Emily gave a bitter laugh. "You're a little too late. I could have used this speech eleven years ago. Heck, even ten years ago, it would have been welcomed." She carried her drink into the living room.

"I… I know I was the worst mother ever and I hurt you, but… I never stopped loving you. You were and always will be the best of everything I have to give to this world."

Emily stopped in front of the balcony and watched the rain pour down. They said things happened in threes. First the doctor orders her to nix the coffee, tea, and soda, then Jake takes a crack at her, and now
this
. If there was a God in Heaven, then Emily could look forward to this family reunion being the last curve ball of the day.

"Emmie, I can't make up the past to you or erase it, but… I'd like for us to be friends. We were once good friends. We can be that way again. Please. Give it a chance."

"Of all the days," Emily mumbled under her breath. Her eyes burned and a lump was lodged in her throat. She had Jake to blame for making her into this emotional ball of fluff.

"Emily, aren't you tired of being alone? I know I am. It's been eleven years. That's long enough. I want my daughter back. I want some peace. We've both earned it."

Emily looked up and struggled to reinforce the flood gates. "
Why
?"

"Because you're my daughter and I love you."

"No," Emily roared. "You almost died! Why?" She spun around. "Why did you do it?"

"
Oh, baby
." Her mother looked at her through bright, teary eyes. "The answer is… so complicated that—"

"Tell me why," Emily ordered through clenched teeth. "Or get out. And don't come back."

Amé pulled back, wide eyed with shock. She blinked and then one by one words tumbled out of her mouth. "Because I couldn't take anymore. I… lost my husband. My job. My money. Our home. And then I lost you."

"You didn't lose me until after the ambulance carried you away." Emily touched her forehead. "What do you mean you lost your money?"

Amé waved her hands in a helpless motion, then paced the width of the room. "Ed."

"Your boyfriend?"

"He was never my boyfriend. He was my accountant," her mother clarified bitterly. "God, I was such a fool. A naïve, worthless fool. I let that man control every aspect of my life." She pivoted and faced Emily. "He manipulated me and I let him. I thought he cared about me. About us. But he didn't give a damn about us. He used me, then stole the money I worked so hard for."

A frown creased Emily's brow. "How?"

"How else? He embezzled it. Ed was your father's best friend and I thought I could trust him. But… when Maximillian died in the car crash, I went numb. I didn't want to do anything but take care of you, the only thing I had to remind me of my Maximillian. But Ed had other plans. Ed always had other plans."

The sarcasm and self-loathing flowed as freely as her mother's tears. "He told me that I had to go back to modeling, because your father's estate was bankrupt. And because I trusted him, I believed him. I didn't know that Ed had already spent all of Maximillian's estate. I let him fire my agent and put himself in charge of my career. He made me do more shows in one year than I had in the five previous. And when I complained about being tired, he gave me a little blue pill. And then another and another and… when that didn't work, he gave me a line of coke.

"Emily, I was twenty-one. You were barely two years old. When I wasn't working, I was taking care of you. I thought I was doing everything right. But I know now that it was all wrong. And for that I am so sorry. I should have made you my number one priority and said to hell with everything else, but… my little Emmie. I am so sorry. I hurt you so much and I don't deserve you. But, God help me, I can't keep going on without you. Please, give me a chance. Just one chance. That's all I'm asking for. One chance to make it up to you.
Please
."

Emily bit her lip to stop it from trembling. "You weren't there when I needed you. It hurt me to know that your career was more important than me. That Ed meant more to you than my father did. That—"